Ei gude wie?

[swordi001]

My blog isn't a safe space btw. It failed the last TÜV inspection due to lack of handrails and Notausgangschilder

[optimisticrunawaygalaxy]

I Love germans "Da ist hopfen und malz verloren" like man we cant even make beer out of that guy

[itsyveinthesky]

[seabassapologist]

[penismage]

Hello!

Howdy!

I’d like, uh, two normal rolls.

Sure thing!

And one with the… With the pumpkin seeds.

Which do you mean?

The one with the… With the seeds.

What are they called?

Uhm… A, uh, “crunchy pumpky.”

Sure thing. Would you like anything else?

Uhh… I’ll also take a, uh… A… A Nutella donut…?

Unfortunately, I don’t know at all what you mean…

A… One of those right there!

You really must tell me, what’s it called??

I… I’m… I’m a dumb piece of shit.

Sure thing! Anything else?

That one there?

You know what you need to do. [Here she switches from the formal, customer service voice to addressing him casually and familiarly.]

I… I’m a little greedy pig, oink oink?

Do it!

[grunts like a pig]

That comes to €13.50, please! Have a beautiful day!

Hello! I’d like an “I hate my father” and two “I have a small willi—” [The word that gets cut off is Pimmel, an un-sexy term for penis.]

[13shapeshifters]

ich glaube das wetter hat vergessen dass es bei pride month ums schwul sein geht und nicht darum wie unglaublich schwül es sein kann.

[langernameohnebedeutung]

Finally. Gay weather.

[official-hessen]

Wettervorhersage: Es wird schwul

[beetroot-murdertime]

Hallo nette deutsche Menschen of Tumblr, mein Britischer Kumpel hat mich was gefragt und ich gebe diese Frage nun an Sie weiter.

Wie ist Ihr Mittag-/ und Abendessen normalerweise? (warme/kalte Gerichte)

Mittag warm essen, Abends warm essen

Mittags warm essen, Abends kalt essen

Mittags kalt essen, Abends kalt essen

Mittags kalt essen, Abends warm essen

Voting ended onJun 10

Und bitte auch schön weiter rebloggen :) damit wir ne größere Gruppe befragen. Oder so.

Mfg, eine Rote Beete

My British friends version btw falls ihr sehen wollt was in der uk abgeht von @blueest-owl he started this debate

[moghedien]

I feel like I need to share this because idk if Europeans are familiar with the presence of Aldi in the US, but at least especially in my area they’ve been growing a lot recently. Like Aldi bought out some local failing grocery chains where I live (Louisiana) and have opened Aldis in all these somewhat rural communities and small towns, which for the record I’m fine with

But as a result of this they are advertising a lot more in my area and also in many cases, the people in these areas have never been confronted with Aldi or any European grocery store. So the ads that Aldi is pushing out to its new US customer base feature a cowboy shopping at Aldi who is explaining to new Aldi customers how Aldi works. Like this cowboy is explaining you gotta put a quarter in the shopping cart and why there are very little name brands. A cowboy is how they want to reach their American customer base. They gave us a cowboy

[moghedien]

Here he is, the Aldi Cowboy

[shabbytigers]

in other developments re german/anglo cultural exchange on breadstuffs, this image was posted to a facebook group yesterday

the following events ensued:

1. predictable lively discussion on the preparation of Wienerschnitzel, in which natives and wurstaboos are pro-puff and everybody else is like *confused dog head tilt* why wouldn’t you want the crust to stay ~attached to the thing you put it on? as with other fried foods?

2. thirty “Bad Schnitzel is my band name” jokes

3. thirty “Bad Schnitzel is my stripper name” jokes

4. one “ah yes, Bad Schnitzel! a lovely spa town” joke

5. this absolute masterpiece:

[tieflingkisser]

[purlturtle]

German Windows:

[langernameohnebedeutung]

Ich habe gerade nur den restlichen Fetzen der Ansage gehört, als ich im Radio auf WDR2 geschaltet habe, dass eine KI-Vorhersage folgt und wollte das überprüfen weil ich dachte, ich muss mich doch verhört haben. BUT ALAS-

[unfug-bilder]

Die Krosse Krabbe (im Hintergrund) hat sich aber massiv verändert

[boybeetles]

Sie transvestigaten meinen ikea hotdog…

[thatswhywelovegermany]

A stroll through the picturesque old town of Homberg (Efze) in Northern Hesse

The Efze in brackets refers to the river Efze on the banks of which this Homberg is located. The appendix (Efze) is necessary because there is another Homberg in the state of Hessen, which is located at the river Ohm and consequently named Homberg (Ohm).

[teachablr-moment]

Is there a reason why they are associated with their respective rivers instead of their respective states? As an American I find this very interesting.

[thatswhywelovegermany]

@teachablr-moment

In this case both cities are in the same state, so there is no point trying to distinguish them by using the state as a byname. But there are other cases that use rivers or other geographical features although they would be distinguishable by state.

The most famous one in the USA may be Rothenburg ob der Tauber (Rothenburg above the river Tauber, Bavaria), which has to be distinguished from Rothenburg (Saale) (Rothenburg at the river Saale, Saxony-Anhalt) and Rothenburg/Oberlausitz (Rothenburg in the Upper Lusatia region of Saxony).

In addition, there are more places called Rotenburg without an h. Rotenburg (Wümme) at the eponymous river used to be called Rotenburg in Hannover after the eponymous kingdom until the government of Lower Saxony discovered in 1969 that the kingdom of Hanover did no longer exist since 1866. Rotenburg an der Fulda is also named after the river.

The reason why so many places are named after rivers is that they were founded at historic river crossings, first fords, later bridges. At these times, the places had no distinguishing byname as most people were not traveling. But with the expansion of trade, they were named after the most important feature for traders, the river crossing. And the reason why there are so many Rot(h)enburgs is because the castles protecting the river crossings were either made from red brick or from red sandstone.

It gets even more insane with Neustadt, New Town. These places were often founded long after the medieval period by the respective monarchs of the area, often to accomodate immigrant refugees. Here is a list of Neustadts:

Neustadt am Rübenberge historically Neustadt am Rouvenberge after a flat, rough (= stone-covered) elevation in the otherwise flat landscape

Neustadt an der Weinstraße after the wine-growing region in Rhineland-Palatinate

Neustadt in Holstein after the Duchy of Holstein in today's state of Schleswig-Holstein

Neustadt bei Coburg near the bigger city of Coburg in Bavaria

Bad Neustadt an der Saale river, the prefix Bad indicates that it is a state-recognized spa

Neustadt in Sachsen after the Kingdom of Saxony, largely identical with today's state of Saxony

Neustadt an der Donau (river, Bavaria)

Neustadt an der Aisch (river, Bavaria)

Neustadt (Hessen) (state)

Neustadt an der Orla (creek, Thuringia)

Neustadt (Wied) (river, North Rhine-Westphalia)

Neustadt an der Waldnaab (river, Bavaria)

Neustadt am Kulm (mountain, Bavaria, belongs to the district of Neustadt an der Waldnaab)

Neustadt (Dosse) (river, Brandenburg)

Neustadt am Main (river, Bavaria)

Neustadt/Vogtl. (historic region of the Vogtland, today straddling the borders of Saxony, Bavaria, and the Czech Republic)

Neustadt/Westerwald (forested hills in Rhineland-Palatinate)

Neustadt unter der Harzburg (after the medieval castle, now part of Bad Harzburg)

Neustadt am Rennsteig (ancient roadway over the heights of the Thuringian Forest, Thuringia)

Neustadt/Harz (mountain range, Thuringia)

Neustadt bei Hachmühlen (neighboring place, Lower Saxony)

Neustadt/Spree (river, Saxony)

Neustadt im Schwarzwald (Black Forest region, today part of the double-city Titisee-Neustadt, Baden-Wurttemberg)

Neustadt an der Rems (river, today part of the double-town of Waiblingen-Neustadt, Baden-Wurttemberg)

There are even more Neustadts not mentioned here because they are villages, located in Austria or Switzerland, or in formerly German territories.

You see that there are often multiple Neustadts in a state, so there is no point naming them after the state. There is also no rule whether to use brackets, a slash, write the byname out or abbreviate it. This has grown historically, and you have to deal with it.

[nothing-but-flowers]

screaming

[thatswhywelovegermany]

Zanke niemals in Gedanken mit jemand. Das verbittert das Gemüt oft mehr als wirklicher Streit und ist die Ursache vieler innerer Unruhe.

Never argue with someone in your thoughts. This often embitters the mind more than an actual argument and is the cause of much inner turmoil.

Carl Hilty (1833 – 1909), Swiss constitutional lawyer and lay theologian

[fansplaining]

The core of her project was, therefore, the sheep rather than the murder, though the book couldn’t exist without both. “Taking them seriously as sheep was really important,” she told me, as was not imposing human morals onto their perspective. “It was quite important to me that they don't have [our] moral background to work with. They have values, but they're not moral values; they're more like practical values. I find that refreshing, because it takes away a lot of things we take for granted, and it helps me to look at things the way they are or the way they would appear to somebody who doesn't come with all that moral baggage.” Though, of course, she does recognize that a truly realistic novel about the consciousnesses of sheep would be “grass and nothing else.” Fiction writers are allowed some creative embellishment.

In our latest, @morgan-leigh interviewed Leonie Swann, the author of Three Bags Full (originally published in German as Glennkill), aka the source for the film The Sheep Detectives. If you enjoyed the movie this weekend, read (or listen to) this piece—and then read the book! 🐑

"Three Bags Full’s Faithful Flock: How a German novel about Irish sheep (detectives) inspired a legion of devotees around the world."

[parakavka]

[cooldogpics]