The Beauty of Progress

[ophaneyjay]

You Reap What You Sow

The school of life:

* Insert Schoolin life by Beyonce.

The true test is not what you think you would do in a situation but how you react when you are in it.- Ophaney Jay

What a journey? I find myself back to square one. I miss writing because it is a true reflection of the exact moment. Honestly, I am VERY burn out because my external still does not reflect my internal. Well at least yet. I keep trying to understand where did I go left? How did I manage to manifest my last two years? (More stories to come). However, I do have big hopes that the beauty I have been manifesting is right around the corner. I started this blog when I was 20 years old because it gave me the space I needed to pour my heart out. Last week, I sat down to read some of my pervious works and I couldn’t help to nitpick at all my errors. I wanted to badly erase it and correct my mistakes. I am sure this piece will also have many mistakes 5 years from now. It just goes to show, I have a lot to work on when it comes to living in the present, 

Let me say this LOUD and CLEAR, if you are looking for perfection. Please press the red X on the right top corner. Sa-Roc said it best, “No, I'm not flawless, I'm scarred up and I'm fine with it.” I’m looking to connect with authentic genuine people that don’t believe in perfection but believe in progression because it is simply the truth. Nothing is overnight. We all struggle in our own way and work hard to improve whatever it is. The missing piece is no one wants to show the ugly cries, sweat, and bruises that come with it.

I want to build a loving and fun relationship with you. (My supporters) I am just grateful you are willing to take this ride and learn all of these Life Lessons with me.

 Xoxo Ophaney Jay

[ophaneyjay]

Share, Like, Comment, Subscribe!!!! Thank you for watching. 🌻

For five years, I've been on this self-love journey on becoming the greater version of myself & THE GLOW HAS BEEN REAL! lol Lately I've been seeing 333 all over the place and I've come to the conclusion that it's time for me to shine my inner light. In this video I give tips on how to conquer your emotions. I HOPE IT BRINGS PEACE, LOVE, & HAPPINESS to your heart, soul, & mind.Don't forget to share, like ,comment, & SUBCRIBEEEEE!

IG-Ophfunny Snapchat-Oreodimples

[ophaneyjay]

Hello Guys!!!!!!

I’m all about being sexy but comfortable. Check out my recent Youtube video, where I model Fashion Nova’s “Nova Season” Jumpsuit, as well as their “ We are never getting back together” dress.Let’s just say it wasn’t what I expected lol but both the items were high quality and worth the money.

[ophaneyjay]

I don’t know the first real thing about the dating game. I don’t know how to talk to a specific person and connect. I just think you have to go to person by person and do the best you can with people in general. - Jason Schwartzman

For the month of March, I decided to try something new when it came to my love life. At the age of 22, I think it’s important to not only learn and love yourself but also to date and see what qualities you like in men. When I was in NYC, my luck in getting a decent guy was like seeing a pig fly. Let’s just say dating there was horrible. I moved to another state for school and I thought this would be a great opportunity for me to join some dating apps. At first, I was reluctant. I kept telling myself you’re not ugly, prince charming will come, just wait on it. Only old desperate people go on dating apps (Sorry for judging lol). What if I get catfish or a creep try to pull a fast one on me. So, my mind automatically shut me down. Time passed and I told myself let’s try it out, If I get any weird vibes, I’ll drop him and go about my life. I went in with a mindset that this might actually be fun. The first dating app I tried was tinder. The crowd was much older than I was and I just wasn’t feeling it. My friend told me about this app call Plenty of Fish (Pof). Instantly I felt comfortable. It was a younger crowd and a lot of handsome black guys. I was overwhelmed but happy as hell. I was a kid at a candy store. Lmaoo. I couldn’t believe how full my message box was. I was definitely feeling myself, Ophaney had some type of sauce. Currently I’m off the app but I had so much fun meeting new people. I would recommend this app to someone who’s new to the dating scene.  If you’re over the age of 21 and you’re considering trying a dating app. Here’s some tips during my journey that I found useful.  

1 Be safe- On my profile I gave a fake name because my name is unique. I started off with 3 pics. Anyone that resembled a creep or came off as a creep. I gave them the “light skin” treatment and left them on seen lol. I meet everyone either in the morning or afternoon. Nothing pass 4pm. Every location I meet these guys at had A LOT of people, for example mall, movies, restaurants. I always had my own transportation.

2. No expectation- My GOAL was to just have FUN! Enjoy each guy company and get to know them as a person. I wasn’t looking for anything sexual and I made sure I made that very clear before meeting each guy. Just make sure his on the same wave length as you in terms of pleasure.

3.Try something new- Go somewhere that you never been to before. It’s a great opportunity to try something different and a great conversation starter.

4.Learn more about yourself- With each date I got more comfortable with interacting with the opposite sex.

Joining the dating app has given me a new viewpoint on the dating scene. I enjoyed myself and I learn some Life Lessons  

[ophaneyjay]

Singling Out all the Singles!

Being brave enough to be alone frees you up to invite people into your life because you want them and not because you need them. - Mandy Hale, 

Single life. This phrase alone can either have you huffing and puffing or nonchalant, depending on how you look at it. When you are single, life can either feel very lonely or like a turn up party. No matter which one of those feelings you resonate with, I’m sure all my single people can agree when I say, THEY CAN DO WHATEVER THEY PLEASE! You move how you want to move. Everything is about you, for you. which can be healthy. What I have observe is high school and adult relationships are the complete opposite and this is not to say that High School love isn’t serious. According to Melbeta, less than 2 percent of all marriages were between high school sweethearts in 2014. Just to give you some perspective. There are 7.53 billion people on earth, 2 percent of 7.53 billion is 150,600,000 people. (One hundred fifty million, six hundred thousand people) Now that’s a lot of people! On the other hand,  Being in my early 20’s, i find it important to stay single and embrace this moment of my life. I can only speak from my experiences. So I decided to come up with 5 simple reasons why you should consider being single in your early 20′s.

1.Single Life Gives you the chance to re-evaluate yourself. You will have the opportunity to realize what you like to do as a hobby on your free time and get to know your true values. 

2.Single Life Helps you learn how to build your own confidence without having to get reassurance from someone else. You will get in the habit of complimenting yourself everyday.  

3.Single Life Can Saves you money. Instead of having to pay for two….You only have to pay for yourself baby! Wait there’s more, the extra money you have you can start putting it in your bank account. 

4. Single Life Can help you enjoy spending time alone.

5.Single Life Allows you to DATE, DATE, DATE! Find out what you do like and what you don’t like. Find out what qualities you look for in a person and change some qualities you don’t like in yourself.

Now don’t get me wrong being in a relationship can be beneficial too. I’m a person that appreciate the idea of love. If someone walks into my life ready to take the inner journey with me, I will be all for it. However, I don’t stress not being in a relationship. I’m just chilling. I just want to help open your eyes to why being single can be great. If you’re single, try to remember at the end of the day it is all about Life Lessons.

Xoxo Ophaney Jay

[ophaneyjay]

I Wanna Go Home, Where I’m Stress Free

I like this place and could willingly waste my time in it. ― William Shakespeare

My home is nature baby! Lol

Being a college student. Being a woman…Being black….Being young…..Forget that. Just from being a human being, I’m sure you can realize that life can be very “stressful”. I put that in quotation marks because I do believe in good stress. That’s that thing that kicks your ass to tell you keep moving punk whenever your mom (guardian) isn’t around to physically do it for you. I take that ass whopping as don’t give up child lol. We have all these “guidelines” and “rules” to follow in order to be accepted in society, our family, our friends group, & that shit can be overwhelming, Forrrr reallll lol. I use to hold people to a high standard but what I’m starting to realize just because I was taught and raise to do something one way, DOES NOT MEAN EVERYBODY WAS TAUGHT THAT SAME WAY. Even being raise with two sisters under the same household for many years, I see how we do things differently. That’s just life, God has made us different for some type of reason lol. I believe your personality, how you perceive yourself in this world, and how you react to situations can contribute to your stress levels.

Someone once told me if you don’t believe in the devil, then he can’t hurt you. He can’t show up in your life because you don’t even entrain the idea of his existence. If you focus on the light then you’ll understand that everything will turn out okay. I laugh at this because she probably don’t even remember telling me this but it was said so that I wouldn’t be afraid of the dark anymore.

However, I took it and ran with it. Using it as motivation for my life. Now, I only focus on the light and entrain whatever I want to come to me, even in my darkest times. Now I don’t want you to think I’m just no stress girl walking around in cloud 9, flying with the birds. Nah sometimes I be like WTF is this stage of life lmaooo but I get through it. Here are some things I do to relieve stress:

1.I go into nature. My two favorite places to go to is the beach and the park. I love going alone. I love siting on the grass/sand and just looking at the sky for hours. Indeed it’s a place where I willingly don’t care to “waste my time” I just go there and absorb the fresh air and energy that the tree gives me.

2.I meditate. In pervious post, I’ve wrote why meditation helped me. It leaves me calm. Reminding me that I’m just human at the end of the day. I’m just trying my best and I’m learning every day.

3.Music. I read a post on IG. Sometimes you need the beat, and sometimes you need the lyrics. When you put it that way, you can see how music is pure gold.

4.I laugh. I laugh at myself. I love. I love myself.

5.Don’t take things personal (This been the hardest one for me). Learning to accept that everybody isn’t going to agree with my views, my reactions to situations, my beliefs. That doesn’t mean I got to stop doing me. I’ve also learn to dust my shoulders off and go about my  life.

6. I don’t hold back my emotions. I express my love, my anger, my sadness, my happiness, disappointments, etc.  The only way I can be fully comfortable is if I show you the real me and vice versa. I always say at least you’ll always know I how I felt. Whether it was verbal or body language. However, I use to be passive aggressive lmaoooo. That didn’t come out clear. So as I’m getting older, I’m learning how to just express myself and get it over with. Life too short to be holding shit in and stressing over it.

I don’t stress things that I can’t control. I don’t stress things that I don’t understand. I only stress things that I want to manifest. You never know you might be stress less with these Life Lessons.

XoXo Ophaney Jay

[ophaneyjay]

Tune-In Vision!!!

As I'm Maturing More Into The Woman I Want To Be,I've Dedicated My 2017 Year On The Idea Of Not Rushing.Don't Rush My Career. Don’t Rush My School Life. Don't Rush My Relationships With My Family & Friends. Don’t Rush My Money Flow.Don't Rush My Love Life. Don’t Rush The Doggy I Want. Don't Rush The Growth I Have With God.Anything I Need Will Gravitate To Me.Whatever I'm Passionate About Will Come To Me,Just As Long As I Water My Seed Everyday & Give It Sunlight. I've Realize Once I Began To Focus, People & Things Started Slipping Away. I Was Battling Two Worlds.I Wanted Everything To Be The Same But I Also Wanted A Change. I Wanted Desperately Everything To Grow With Me!.However, This Was One Of The Reason Why My Ass Was Stagnant. Unfortunately Everything Can't Grow With You Oph. I Had To Let Go.Now With Understanding How Earth Energy Works,I Have Learned & Experience Stuff Must Go, In Order To Recieve Better & Greater.I Know There Is Someone Who's Struggling With The Two Worlds Or Wanting Life To Hurry The Hell Up As I'm Writing This.Shit Even Some Days I Struggle With The Two .Lol But Here's My Word Of Advice:

Keep God (Your Higher Being/Your Faith) Close.Drink Your "Nectar", Learn Yourself, & Gain Strength.Then One Day You'll Be Able To Shed You're Skin Caterpillar,Take A Leap Of Faith & Fly Into Your New World Like A Bomb Ass Butterfly. Don't Give Up. Enjoy The Life Lesson.

 XoXo Ophaney Jay

[ophaneyjay]

A Table For One Please!

Now that you’re an adult, you might still feel a pang of guilt when you decline a dinner invitation in favor of a good book. Or maybe you like to eat alone in restaurants and could do without the pitying looks from fellow diners. Or you’re told that you’re “in your head too much”, a phrase that’s often deployed against the quiet and cerebral. - Susan Cain

 Everything in that quote applies to my life lol. As I get older I find myself wanting to be alone more often. Now don’t get me wrong I love socializing and being in big groups sometimes. LETS PARTYYYYYY!!!! Being able to hang with family and friends is truly a blessing. However, when it comes to being alone I don’t think we do it to feel lonely. Not at alllllll but to be alone is to know thy self. Often times when we’re caught up in a big group, we don’t learn who we are as a person. We never give our mind a chance to do that. We get so caught up wanting to please the next person or wanting to be liked by everyone else. This just becomes draininggggg. I’ve always been my own person but I found myself sMOTHERING the people around me. I believe this can hinder people opportunities to grow. Sometimes you have to take a step back and let people learn for themselves. So that they can be able to tell their own personal experience. I’ve finally learn that I’ve been placed on earth to pour my water into people lives but not to drown them. I recommend anyone to take the time to learn themselves and learn to be alone. Here are some reasons why:

1.Know Thyself: This gives you the opportunity to learn what you like. What do you like to read? What are your hobbies? Who are you as a person? What shows do you like to watch? What do you stand for as a person? When you’re given a chance to spend countless hours alone, you figure out things that are interesting/ unique about you as a person.(I definitely recommend this for young woman in their early 20’s)

2.You Begin To Grow Up: You become independent. You start to rely on your own instinct for things .You start to remove people and habits that no longer serve you for the path you’re heading to. You being to focus on whatever you consider your goals are for this world. You begin to transform.

3. Focus On Your Passion: You begin to realize how much time you waste on social media/television/people. You begin to gain an understanding on what you should put your energy towards. Whether it’s towards more knowledge on your goals. Traveling. Getting more mula for security (If that’s what you believe money is). Building a better relationship with God, family, and/or friends. I know this might sound cliché but the little things become more important.

4.Inner Work: Boyyyyyy is this one a hard one but in my opinion the most important one. You’ll start digging into your past. You’ll start  to heal your wounds. You’ll start to work on yourself. NO ONE LIKES SEATING ALONE FACING ALL THEIR EMOTIONS but this can help you change. If you learn more about yourself on why you do certain things or why you act a certain way. NO ONE CAN TELL YOU WHO YOU ARE. You will start changing things about yourself you feel you need to improve on. This will only bring confidence into your life. The end results are pleasing, I promise you. You’ll start to live.

5.Think For Yourself: You will no longer soak in what society tells you. You do your own research for knowledge and have your own beliefs. You’ll start moving as you please. At first this will be tricky because now you’re in a position that forces you to be alone. This only will make you feel lonely. I say try your best to volunteer in something that you’re passionate about or anything that interest you. Also go into nature (The park/ocean). This is what grounded me, and then you’ll start to find likeminded people. Just always remember there is at least one person that has similar thoughts as you.

You never know. Next time you might really turn down that dinner date to read a book. Next time you might tell the host a table for one. I feel that everybody will one day in their life have to face being alone. For some it might be voluntary, for others it might not be. All I know is that it’s beneficial when it is time to become an individual.I wish you the best of luck when it comes to this challenge in your life.I know it’s very difficult but I believe in order to grow to become the better version of yourself, you’ll need this important Life Lesson

Xoxo Ophaney Jay

[ophaneyjay]

Help A Sister Out!!!

Hey guys!

Can you guys just share my GoFundMe Link Or support me with whatever you have. Thank you in advance. There are more Life Lessons for me to learn.

https://www.gofundme.com/OphaneyJEducation

Xoxo Ophaney Jay

[ophaneyjay]

I Think I Can...No I Know I Can!

Don’t let mental blocks control you. Set yourself free. Confront your fear and turn the mental blocks into building blocks. - Roopleen

YES YOU CAN!!! Obama said it best.

Get that word can’t out of your vocabulary and embrace the word can. Over the weekend I was listening to Upbeat Buddha podcast on Youtube. He stated a phrase “If I don’t, I won’t”.  Often times it is us who is stopping ourselves from achieving a goal. We rather blame it on time or financial expenses before blaming it on our habits. It’s okay, I was on the same boat. The word can’t derive from our fear of the unknown. It’s normal to be terrified but it isn’t normal when it stops us from living life.  You know how many times my inner voice had to tell myself yes I can, so that I could do another pull up?  I mean at the moment I can only do about two or three lol but there was a time where I couldn’t even hold my weight up. I was scare that I will fall right on my face lol but I knew I had to try in order to get better. The point is you’ll go as far as you allow yourself to go. You’ll go as high as you want to see. It is you that have to believe in yourself and go for the big dream. Here are some reason I think you should let go of the word can’t and instill the word can in your daily life:

1. You’ll learn something new. How will you ever learn, if you never try? What’s the worst that can happen; it doesn’t go as plan? (This doesn’t apply to situations that may cause you to die lol)However, that’s the beauty of growing. The word can’t just stop you from trying something new. Regardless you’re going to encounter situations that are going to force you to change, if you’re not making a change already. Eventually you’ll have to say yes I can one day.

2. This can’t word. Yeah… it gives you an excuse to not build a flourish life. You become stagnant and boring as shit. This will eventually make your life dry. Same ole routine every day, for the rest of your life. Come on! Tell me that don’t sound dull. All I’m saying is that the word can’t, can stop you from doing fun things.

3. You will always have fear eating at you until you finally die. In order to not be scared of something you have to face it and do it. For example, I was shit scare to drive on the highway. (Side note: I’m from NYC, so MTA is our best friend) However, I brought a car and I needed to know how to drive on the highway to get to school. What to do? Let’s just say one day I woke up and told myself you need to get on this highway and face this fear. Long story short, I can drive on the high way now. The point is once you overcome that fear for whatever it is, it becomes second nature. It can no longer take over your life. You’ll tell yourself “I’ve been there! Done that!” So what’s next will be your new attitude.

4. I believe the more you experience in life the more wisdom you can teach. Personally, I like to be my own test dummy for my own life. Everything I write on my blog is things that I’m doing in my life, so I know these tips work. I can only teach my experiences. However, if I say I can’t in all my situations then I can only teach you what I assume is going to happen because I never went to try for myself. I don’t know if that makes sense to you guys, but I try to explain it the best I can lol. Basically the word can, can make you certain on things.

The more you tell yourself yes I can, the more you push yourself to become the person you envision yourself to be. Nothing is easy but it’s worth it. Get rid of fear today and become a better you tomorrow. Build yourself first, so that one day you can teach people these Life Lessons.

Xoxo Ophaney Jay

[ophaneyjay]

Burst Out Laughing

The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter. Mark Twain

One of my favorite things to do is to have at least one belly laugh a day. If you personally know me then you know this is very true.  As they say “one laugh a day, keeps a frown away”. Okay no one ever said that but that quote should be valid. I know I’m not the only person that sits in their room and laugh at a silly memory that plays in their head .O_o.  Laughter is good for the soul. Laughing is literally contagious. Ever been around someone that’s laughing and you start to laugh too, even though you don’t know what the joke is. Yeahhh… Me too. Laughing puts out a positive vibe/ energy into the air that makes everyone feel good. Take the time out to laugh about anything or everything. I think laughing can help you remember to live a stress free life. Here are some reminders of why you should laugh:

1. Laugh at yourself. This will help you accept yourself even more. You know how much dumb shit I do in a day?  Lol can’t count but this method has taught me how to not be embarrass easily. We’re all humans, we all make mistakes. Even if you’re the most awkward person in the world, you better own it. You’re true friends will understand it and love it.

2.Laughing builds a stronger bond in your personal relationships. Whether it’s with your family, friends, God, coworkers, whomever. PEOPLE LOVE TO LAUGH. If you guys have the same sense of humor then you’ll instantly click. You might gain a lifelong friend by saying a silly joke. It won’t hurt to try it.

3.Can’t go a day without hearing “Ophaney you play too much”. Lmaoo. I love to joke around. I have the talent to take anything serious and make it into a joke. So why not use my talent? I enjoy putting smiles on people faces, it replenish my energy.  If you notice that you’re a natural born comedian put it out into the universe. People will appreciate your humor.

4.Laughing can bring liveliness into a room. You know when you’re in school/work and the environment is dead. No one is speaking, people are half a sleep, and then the funny guy/gal comes in .Now it’s lit, right. Lol. People like feeling happy , which makes the environment comfortable.

5.Laughter cures diseases. I’m not a scientist but most cancer survivors stated that laughing helped them push through life. Could that mean laughing is a medicine? I don’t know but I do know it can heal a lot of inner wounds.  

Spread love and laughter. Be the light for someone else. Be the light for your own life. Remember laughing is one of the best weapons human beings have. The good thing is it doesn’t kill people but it heals people. Remember to laugh while doing these Life Lessons.

Xoxo Ophaney Jay

[ophaneyjay]

To Be Rich, Come with a Million Thank you’s

I Am Rich! Both healthy and wealthy. –Ophaney Jay 

On Christmas Day, I woke up in the mood to go to church. One thing I know Is my angels always send me to church when I really need the message. I’ve never been the materialistic type. Give me a plate of food and I’ll love you forever lol. That day the priest was reminding us that if we have our health and our family, then we are rich. Personally, I had to agree with him. Service reminded me of a quote I have on my 2016 vision board “I Am Rich! Both healthy and wealthy”. I want to share with you how I break down this quote in my morning ritual.

  Abundance of Love. 

1.    I’ll start with the wealthy part, since that’s how I usually say my morning ritual. I always thank the universe for letting me have my family and friends that love and support me through my life journey. Sometimes we can overlook the cheerleaders that’s right besides us and focus on the people that isn’t cheering for us. Don’t even bother putting your energy into that. The more thankful you are in your relationships the healthier they become.   

Abundance of Money. 

2. Then I go on by saying I’m thankful for my jobs. Even though I’m not where I want to be career wise, I’m thankful for the skills that each job has taught me/still teaching me. I know these jobs are shaping me into the career woman I will like to be. Plus, responsibilities don’t stop for anyone Lol. I know this might sound crazy but I’m thankful for my bills/loans. I can either complain and moan like a bitch about them lol or just take them as it is lol. I rather the second one.

* I’m grateful that I can accumulate enough money every month, to save, pay my bills, and travel. (I speak this out loud to the universe).  Also, the thought of knowing there’s a lot more money flowing around, keeps me reaching for more.

 Abundance of Knowledge/Speech. 

3.I’m thankful for the knowledge that I have learned/experience. We are all different and we are all here to learn something different. God has placed certain challenges into our lives, so that we don’t only learn from them but teach others them as well. I thank Universe/Angels/God for sending me signals that I understand and protecting/guiding me through my life path. 

  Abundance of Health. 

4.After I finish with why I am rich on how wealthy I am, I begin saying how rich I am with having my health. I’m thankful for the body that I have and the organs that work together to keep me alive. Usually I try to name all my organs but the farthest I get to is my lungs and heart. So, I just stick to thanking them as a group. Lmaoo. 

Abundance of Strength. 

5. I’m thankful for the strength that I have to eat and drink healthy. Now, every now and again I eat my ice cream, cookies, and cake. Boy do I enjoyyyyyy that! However, I have this understanding that it’s more for a treat then a daily thing. As I said before in previous posts, our body is our car that drives us through life. 

Abundance of Self-Love. 

6.I’m thankful for the kind words I say to myself and others. I never had a problem with supporting and pushing others. However, I’m not going to lie when I first started this journey it was so hard for me to say kind words to myself. Looking back, I can’t believe how hard I was on myself. I’ve come to a space in my life where I rather be my best friend than my worst enemy. 

This is my process of getting healthier and richer. Every day I gain more love for myself and give/receive from others. Take the time to do these Life Lessons.

Xoxo Ophaney Jay

[ophaneyjay]

Gaining More, Weighting less

You had purpose before anyone had an opinion-Instagram post

By the time, we’re adults, we see ourselves from someone else’s viewpoint. We often forget the superman/superwoman we thought we were as a child. I remember those days when I was perfectly fine with who I was. Didn’t have a care in the world about my appearance.  Then one day someone said I was fat and I actually believed them lol. Silly me! Growing up weight was one of my biggest insecurities. Looking back I definitely wasn’t fat but I was bigger than most girls my age. Lets just say God decided to give me my curves early on in the game. The only problem was that I was the only girl (well it felt like it) with all these over flowed riches in not only one but both areas of the female anatomy. I had a bootayyy and breast on me. Lol. Talk about change. I’ve always been physically active, so this wasn’t a health problem. Now that I’m older I understand different body types. I will never be a Mya no matter how much I try. Okayy. Lol. It took me 22 years to be fully comfortable with all my extra fat, jiggly ass, stretch marks, wide shoulder self. Basically, it is what it is. The weight that has been taking off my shoulders is greater than the actual weight that I have lost. I’m so happy to be in love with myself and I want to share my tips on how I became in love with my body

1. For a fact, I know you didn’t wake up one day and said to yourself “I hate my body”. Someone words, a media outlet, or your decision to compare yourself to someone did. I need you to understand, if you don’t love the body that you’re in now. You WILL NEVER LOVE YOUR BODY. It’s mentally impossible. You can add new rims and lights to a car but it will still be the same ole car. Your body is your life car. Accept yourself. Accept the model you are.

2 Be thankful you have a body that function correctly. If you can walk, run, and jump, you are blessed. God has giving you a vehicle that can start without a jump. Instead of criticizing your body, fuel it with positive energy. Say thank you to it. What a great job it’s doing to keep you alive. It will reward you for all your praises.

3. The good thing is, it’s just weight. It’s flexible baby lol. If you lose too much, you can always gain it back. If you feel you’re too heavy, you can always lose it. You do what makes YOU HAPPY.

4. Whenever someone tells me they feel depress or stuck. I ask them about their eating/exercise habits. The two actions correlate with each other. You eat well, you feel well. I’m sure you’ve heard this a million times. Well let me be the millionth and one time. I’m not saying eating and exercising will eliminate all your problems but it will be a start to fixing them.  You will look great and feel great. Let me say, I’m always the first one to say “I’m feeling myself”. (As I should =)

5. The progress that you will see from your workout routine will give you the motivation you will need for all other areas in your life. Once you put in the hard work in one section of your life and you begin to want to change your whole life for the better.

Be that infiniti and give yourself infinite love. You deserve it. Take one step at a time. The bigger picture will soon show itself. Instead of saying I want to lose weight tell yourself you want to let go of the weight. The change in words will let your mind understand that you’re doing this for a positive reason. I wish you the best of luck and that you enjoy these Life Lessons.

Xoxo Ophaney Jay

[ophaneyjay]

A Conversation With God

Earlier today I kept asking God."What would you like me to do on this earth?"Like i was deadass frustrated, Not because things aren't going well (Things are actually going well to say the least) but with being so young and having to choose your own life path it can be intimidating at times.So tonight i'm checking my emails and i come across one that was written by me earlier this year.I decided to open it & this is what it said:

There are many inspirational people that have left an impact on my life. I could say I want to dream of being like them but that means I would not be myself. Each of us were uniquely made with different talents and intelligence. I want to use the tools that I have learned from those who have had an impact in my life to create my own footprints. My dream is to see the potential in people who do not believe in themselves. I want to encourage people to follow their dreams and stray away from being afraid. I want to help others change their perspective and concentrate on their inner growth.I will encounter new challenges that will give me experiences, so that I can be able to help someone build their own character. I also dream of becoming a more well-formed individual intellectually. Being a student of life will expose me to a world of unlimited resources that will prepare me with the tools needed to share knowledge and resolve problems as a leader and advocate to help communities. Just like many influential leaders before my time I want to influence the nation. I will become the person I want to be.

I'm not going to sit here and preach to yall lol but God do answer prayers. With whatever you're struggling with, I say talk to him and see what he says to you. I eventually got my answer and now my mind is back on track on what's my purpose on this earth.Today I definitely learn a Life Lesson. 

XoXo Ophaney Jay

[ophaneyjay]

Music Abun-dance

Music is a higher revelation than all wisdom and philosophy - Ludwig van Beethoven

Right now I want you to think of your favorite song. While you’re at it, sing a few lines. As you sing your heart out, I want you to think why is this specific song your favorite? How often do you listen to it? When do you listen to it? How does it make you feel? When I first started my journey, I remember waking up one day and just erasing all the music off my phone. Till this day I still can’t explain why I did it but all I know is at that moment in time I needed to switch it up. I took the time to google new song artists. At first nothing was catching my attention. I was over it! Lol .Then I came across two artists (Markel Cam Fletch| Album: Galaxy) and (Kehlani| Album: Cloud 19). Boyyyy did I play out their music lol. I ate to their music, I slept to their music, and I showered to their music. Basically any free time I had, I LISTENED TO THEIR MUSIC. Now I wasn’t the type to listen to hardcore music but the songs I did listen to were mostly selling sex, drugs, not giving a fuck, degrading both women and men. Nothing with heart or passion. Now don’t get me wrong I still listen to those songs now lmao but I’m more aware of the vibrations it sends me. Music can literally heal the soul. The question is what are you feeding your soul? Below are some reasons why I think you should change the music you listen to on a regular basic and put some new spice into your life.

1.Music has vibrations that can change your vibrations. When you listen to a song sub-consciously you’re aligning yourself to that vibration/energy. I say if you usually feel down, listen to a song that has powerful words or an instrumental that your body likes. You’ll see how fast your mood changes.

2. You become more conscious of the music you listen to. Now that you’re pushing yourself to switch it up, you’ll start to realize that you want to listen to something that is more uplifting. This doesn’t necessarily mean gospel but you’ll gravitate to songs that have a message.

3. Hey ! Its new music. Another song to add on to your repeat playlist. We all love that feeling of finding a new song that explains your current or past situation so well.

4. Strengthen your mind by giving it new sounds. I’m no scientist but one side of our brain deals with sound waves (Something like that) lol & by listening to new music you give that part of your brain the opportunity to grow.

5. You’ll be poppin when the aux cord is handed to you. Lmaooo but you can share it with friends. So that they can enjoy the art as well.

Take the time out to listen to a new song every day. If not every day, whenever you can. Remember music is supposed to be healing the soul not paining it. Take the time to smile and enjoy something new. Try it out, it won’t kill you. It would just be a Life Lesson.

Xoxo Ophaney Jay

[ophaneyjay]

Selfish V.S Selfull

If it doesn’t feel good with your soul, LET IT GO!!!- Ophaney Jay

This year I decided to write a vision board for my room wall. I had titled it “My 2016 World”; I wrote 12 quotes that would be my daily ritual, so that my 2016 would be full of joy and positivity. To my surprise these quotes have helped me a lot with expressing how I feel and being fearless. I read these quotes to myself everyday (Well I try) lol as a reminder that life is a blessing and not to stress the little things out. The quote above written by me is one of my favorite because it set the tone for my day. It always reminds me to be loyal to myself. Growing up I often heard that being selfish wasn’t a good trait. That these acts will delivery you right to hell lmaoo. I’m pretty sure all of us could relate to hearing this idea once in our lives. So as we grow up we do exactly what our parents tell us to do, give to the world but never learning how to receive from the world. No one taught me the difference between being selfish and learning how to listen to the soul(Selfull). Don’t get me wrong, giving is a way of life (give,give,GIVE!) but when does it turn into self-sabotaging? Trust me there is a big gap when it comes to the two lol but luckily I have come to understand the difference. Here are some examples that has taught me the difference between the two

1. Selfish: Giving all you can to the world but not giving to yourself. Now there is nothing wrong with helping others but once it becomes overwhelming and starts interfering with your own life negatively. Something has to change. Sometimes we give more than we can emotionally, physically, financially, and mentally. Either you want to be that worker that helps everyone, even though you have a shit load of work piling up or that family member that’s trying to keep the family together but your own life is falling apart. When do you say to yourself enough is enough? Start asking yourself what am I giving to this person /what are they going to use it for/ is this harming me in any way? Focus on how much time and energy you can give to something or someone. Remember you can give as much as you want or as little as you want because you’re living life for yourself.  (The last line does not pertain to your children. I have yet to become a parent lol)

Selfull: Making sure your glass is full so that people can drink from it. People that enjoy their own life can give more. You can’t help anyone that’s thirsty with an empty cup, NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES YOU TRY! The more water your cup has the more you can give. However, you first have to find the water by yourself and drink it to see if it’s even good. When people have are confident about their water it no longer feels like “it’s the right thing to do” but you know this stuff works, so you now want to share. Remember you can only pour as much water as you have, nothing more.So choose wisely.

2.Selfish:Staying in a relationship where you know you’re betraying yourself.To betray yourself is the ultimate level of disloyalty. People get so caught up with wanted to show that they are a “ride or die” or don’t want to hurt someone because they know that person truly loves them. (I been in both those situation, I know it isn’t easy) This could be a lover, a parent, friend, sibling, etc.  We often live life wanting to please people or to be like. Nothing is wrong with any of those things but the problem occurs when you’re not confident with your own judgment. Your soul is telling you it’s time for change, you and so & so is growing apart but you stay because it’s comfortable or you want to prove to the person you’ll stay no matter how unhappy you are. This isn’t compromising.(Please try your best to understand the next few lines)  When you compromise it’s a genuine action, it’s beneficial to BOTH OF YOU GUYS! You guys are BOTH HAPPY with the goals it will eventually turn out to be. However, staying in a relationship where you know it’s toxic is selfish to yourself because you’re not allowing new to come into your life, so that you can learn more and grow more. To grow as a person, you need to accept changes otherwise only your age will be the only thing that changes.

Selfull: Giving yourself time to know who you are. Once you know who you are as a person, NO ONE CAN TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOU. You’ll always ask yourself if you are happy in any situation. You put your positive emotions (Joy, peace, love. Etc) first. For example: Is this person/situation contributing to the type of peace I want for my life? If your answer is no to your question….then my friend you are betraying yourself.  

 3.Selfish: Doing something that you know you don’t enjoy doing. I still don’t understand why people do this to themselves. It’s okay to not like the “normal things” and it okay to like the “normal things”. That’s the beauty of life: We’re all different. Do what makes your souls truly happy. Soul happiness is when you overcome all your pains, triggers, low energies, self-hatred emotions and you’re able to just do what you love freely. 

Selfull: Doing whatever you please despite other people opinions on it. As long as your soul is happy that’s all that matters.

Don’t wait till next year to do a vision board. Do it now! Do one for the month of November and see how it goes. I suggest letting one of the quotes be “If it doesn’t feel good with the soul, LET IT GO!!!!”Every time you read this quote it will help you question your loyalty to yourself. Try it out,your soul deserves these Life Lessons.

XoXo Ophaney Jay

[ophaneyjay]

Be Yourself

A love similar to the sun and earth. The sun doesn’t warm up earth asking what’s in it for me. –I heard it somewhere can’t remember where but the statement was powerful to me.

The power of love….. is so strong. We all want to be love, at least for me I know I do. I love the idea of love. Having someone to speak to, support you, challenge you, encourage you, etc. This is what I consider love whether it’s from a family member, friendship, spouse, or God. I’ve come to learn that you can’t truly understand loving someone until you completely love yourself. We live in a society that is under the “depression spell” because we were taught to be everything but our true authentic self. I want to help anyone that is struggling on learning how to be comfortable with self. Here are some tips I do to have abundance of self-love.

1. Be kind to yourself. You are your most important teammate. For the duration of your life, just remember saying kind words to yourself will make life better for you. Focusing on your strengths and improving on things you’re not good at is better than doubting yourself. Learn to accept who you are.

2.Take care of your body. We all like different things. This also includes the things we eat. Figure out your taste buds. Figure out what workout routines you like best. Remember your body is your best friend. It is the car you use to drive through life.

3.ENJOY YOUR OWN LIFE. Comparison will only make you feel lower than someone. Social media has given us this illusion that people have a “fun-er life” than us. LIESSSSS!!!! I know some of us can’t jump on the next plane to God knows where and start turning up lol but take the time out to do something you enjoy. For example I enjoy going to the park and seating on the grass. Some might find this to be boring but this is where I can connect to my inner thoughts and be at peace. Find out what works for you and take the time to actually do it.

4.Support your own goals/dreams. No one can believe in you, if you don’t believe in yourself. Everyday do something that pushes you towards your dreams. Listen to your intuition on which path to walk on. Never give up and understand the power is in you and God.(Or whatever source you believe in)

5.Laugh, Laugh, Laugh ^__^

This will take many years to do but the results are so pleasing. I’m still learning myself but I know every baby step is worth it.I know I can make my big picture come true. I say give it a try and learn these Life Lessons.

XoXo Ophaney Jay