the prosecutor's proposal is proof that when you lean into what your country's good at (homoerotic police procedurals) you fuckin knock it out the park holy shit this show is so good
Misplaced Lens Cap

Origami Around
RMH
Today's Document
𓃗
No title available

roma★
Not today Justin
almost home

Game Changer & Make Some Noise

pixel skylines
d e v o n

titsay

#extradirty

blake kathryn
Doug Jones
Claire Keane

No title available

No title available
Interview Vampire Daily
seen from Türkiye
seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Russia
seen from India

seen from Germany

seen from India
seen from Estonia
seen from Pakistan

seen from Colombia
seen from United States
seen from Canada

seen from United States

seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from Singapore
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
@parvuspapilio
the prosecutor's proposal is proof that when you lean into what your country's good at (homoerotic police procedurals) you fuckin knock it out the park holy shit this show is so good
look at her
reblog for noises
Erika Toliusis (b.1969) - Pacific Angel. 2022. Oil with palette knife on canvas.
@teaboot
Painted with a FUCKING PALETTE KNIFE?
today I found out my mother doesn’t know what dandelions are and now I’m wondering what other strange secrets she’s been quietly harboring
Where do you live that you don’t have dandelions?
we have dandelions EVERYWHERE, they are basically our State Weed, it is absolutely impossible that my mom has never interacted with a dandelion before, this requires further investigation
So after extensive interrogation I have an update:
my mom is in fact aware that dandelions exist. she temporarily forgot the name and there was some miscommunication.
the truth is actually weirder
she’s aware dandelions look like this
she is familiar with this flower. she knows the name of this flower. she declines to believe, however, that these are also dandelions
she does not believe these are the same plant. I tried to explain, and she thought I was either misinformed or lying. so I asked her what exactly did she think the yellow ones were called?
she answered, with complete confidence: Daffodils.
gosh I enjoy this website
For comparison, this is a daffodil
See, folks in the southern US will tell you up and down those are buttercups, actually.
i don’t think so? i’m southern and buttercups are what we call these things (much tinier)
Wait I thought those bigger cup ones were Easter Lillies???
This is an Easter Lily. It is an actual lily and therefore deadly to cats.
They’re marigolds and I know a bitch when I see one!
This is a marigold:
….we need to start taking the phrase “go touch grass” more literally. go outside and examine a flower i beg u
Trust & Safety Phishing Comments
Date Posted: July 23, 2026
AO3 has recently seen a wave of comments claiming to be made by the "AO3 Trust & Safety team", notifying you that your account has been restricted. These claims are not true. These comments are not being made by real AO3 volunteers and your account has not been restricted.
AO3 volunteers, including the Policy & Abuse committee, will never communicate with you through comments on your work. All important communications from AO3 will be sent through the email associated with your account. More general announcements will be posted on our official social media accounts or published as news posts on AO3 or OTW.org.
If you receive one of these comments, do not click on any of the links in it, reply to it, or interact with it in any way. The links in these comments lead to sites asking you to verify your identity by providing payment information. This is a common credit card scam. AO3 does not ever ask users to provide payment information, and the Policy & Abuse committee will never comment on your works asking you to "complete an identity verification process".
If you encounter one of these comments or believe your account has been compromised, please view the instructions under the cut!
me holding a gun to a mushroom: tell me the name of god you fungal piece of shit
mushroom: can you feel your heart burning? can you feel the struggle within? the fear within me is beyond anything your soul can make. you cannot kill me in a way that matters
me cocking the gun, tears streaming down my face: I’M NOT FUCKING SCARED OF YOU
Hey OP? What the FUCK does this mean?
decay exists as an extant form of life
That’s a terrifying answer, have a nice day
THE ORIGINAL?!?!!!!!!!!;!!!!!!!!???
Yahhh I have to build Rome. Yup it’s due tomorrow.. noo I haven’t started yet haha is that bad?
like logically ofc i know my sleep disorder is indeed a disorder but it's still crazy to me that i have been taking my sleep meds every single night without fail for 3 months now, and as a result i have been sleeping by midnight and THROUGH the night every single night without fail for three months. but tonight i forgot to take it on time and now it's almost 3 am and i'm awake. it doesn't matter how long i stick to a rhythm, i will no magically become a healthy sleeper. these meds are genuinely life saving.
absolutely bonkers and actually MADDENING thinking about spending nearly three DECCAAAAADESSSS of my life believing i could just "fix" my schedule and get my sleep "on track." LMAO. i was up at 4 am when i was 6 years old sneaking downstairs to watch TV in misery bc i couldn't sleep and then i was still 32 YEARSSSS old like "no everyone listen THIS week i'm gonna avoid naps and go to bed on time and then i'll sleep normal from now on. for real this time." AJVBJAS SHUT UP!!!! NO YOU WEREN'T BABY!!!!!!!!! YOU WERE NEVER GONNA BE ABLE TO DO THAT!!!!!!
i went to my doctor in march and i was like "man you gotta help me. i haven't slept in 75 hours. and i know sometimes people say that but they really mean they've only slept 2 or 3 hours a night for several nights, which is awful of course, but i mean quite literally i haven't slept in 75 hours. and i keep waiting to finally 'crash' but i don't."
and he was like, "has this ever happened to you before?"
and i said, "oh yeah loads of times, since i was a toddler."
and he said, "why are you just now getting help?"
and i said, "well recently when i hit the 60 hour mark i've started hallucinating birds. and that's new."
and he said, "what do you mean, birds?"
and i said, "i don't know, i think they're house sparrows"
and he said, "i didn't mean what kind of birds"
(true that's not what he said but it was hard to parse the nuances of the conversation because there were a bunch of house sparrows in the room)
Sometimes you log on to tumblr dot com and see your beloved mutuals thirsting over unrisen sourdough men and you have to say a very very quiet ‘pass’ to yourself and let it go because inevitably the flat circle of time will bring around your turn to go gaga over some butterface dude or bug eyed girl and you must know that your beloved mutuals are saying a quiet ‘pass’ to themselves and leaving you to your moment of insanity in peace.
sorry @notobadthings im incapable of leaving these thoughts in the tags bc i need to be able to see and contemplate them for all time:
just once I want to see a good post critiquing makeup culture that doesn’t turn out to be made by some janky radfem blog
oh hey!! I’m not a janky radfem I can do it myself!
makeup culture is wack and normalizes a ludicrously high bar as the bare minimum women can do. I saw a “lazy"makeup tutorial the other day that listed 22 separate goddamn products. you’re supposed to buy and know how to use 22 different things on your face just for the privilege of being considered lazy and that’s uuuuuuh what’s the word? bullshit.
0 products also works great
because I’m gonna be real here, the idea that 22 products is a minimum sucks but it’s really upsetting that any amount of makeup is the bare minimum at all
I would really just suggest some powder foundation, concealer, mascara and lipgloss/lipstick, or tbh just mascara works too, but that’s up to you
I’m sorry if I didn’t express this clearly enough in the original post but I’m not really looking for more concise makeup regiments. my intention was to point out how it’s Bad that makeup is considered a bare minimum at all, regardless of individual feelings on the matter
no face should be “required” to have “a minimum” of makeup. makeup has no health benefits and does nothing but fill the pockets of companies that prey on women and our insecurities.
makeup should not be seen as hygiene because it isnt. get that shit out of your head.
this post: makeup culture is ridiculous and 22 products should not be considered a minimum requirement for someones face. no one should have to do that
the notes: so like……. what youre saying is……. we need to make the minimum about 5 or 6 instead… i gotcha
#nobody survived this post
Official graveyard post
stop telling people I’m dead
Falkirk Cafes have started to beef over AI in advertising which led to one of the best ones posting this. Lol lol lol.
reminds me of this sign I saw in the Netherlands a few years ago:
No one - and I mean no one- could have prepared me just how much of my adult life would consist of keeping the dumbest dog ever created alive against his will
It's 103 degrees out and your brain is the size of pea dude I can't let you lay out there and bake all day you'll literally LITERALLY fry your little pea brain please stop screaming at me
Am I putting the mop bucket up high to keep it from my child? Now I am not. This dummy thinks Lysol is just flavoring even though it made him vomit.
He's sobbing uncontrollably, borderline howling because I'm cooking and I won't give him the ENTIRE ONION I HAVE ON THE COUNTER
If he was 10% more intelligent I'd think he wants to die but look at this face. This is not the face of a man with a singular thought in his head:
It appears that all parties with the exception of Restore are not going to entertain Farage’s media circus.
Count Binface - it is your time. People of Clacton, please do the funniest fucking thing that’s happened in UK politics for a while.
Shitposting at its finest.
extremely underrated subgenre of tumblr post: when someone makes a general statement about something, and another person offers a counter-statement that's just completely nonsensical, and the OP just agrees instantly even if it makes no sense at all
examples:
"Sewing is a gateway drug to thinking through complex problems. It seems really simple; culturally, we make it women's work. Let me tell you: real sewing at any kind of level of proficiency is a bloody magic trick. Sewing, like mold making, involves mental frames that require one to think inside out and backwards. It requires one to work on an order of operations that is often taking into account the reverse. It's a really, really important skill, and if you learn how to sew, you're mostly on your way to carpentry and welding and sheet metal work. I'm not kidding: these are planar forms meeting under rules and conditions. And if you can make a sleeve work, I swear to God, you could build a house."
--Adam Savage
Also, don't be afraid to "Be bad at sewing" check like ONE video on the basics for a good seam, go into any clothing store, check THEIR seam quality and quickly realize that you can do way better even as a complete noob. Sewing isn't wizardry, it's logic and patience and fun and practicality for all levels.
For people who are scared about "being bad at sewing" here are a couple concrete ways you can be "bad" at it (and what the consequences of that is). I still sometimes make these mistakes and i've been sewing since i was seven. ***Forgetting to add seam allowance. *** For some projects this is not a big deal and it'll just turn out a bit smaller than you intended. For other things, you will be crying and kicking yourself about expensive wasted fabric. Beginner Advice: Just don't start out making things that use expensive fabric. Make some cheap shit first to practice, like a muslin pillowcase. Beginner Reassurance: Even if you fuck this up, and you cry and kick yourself a bit, it might not the end of the world. You can always add an extra panel of fabric to make up the difference -- the real trick is figuring out how to do that in a way that looks like Intentional Design so no one else ever notices you were covering up a mistake. (This is something that even really experienced sewists do all the time -- you might have a piece of fabric in your stash that you bought years ago without a project in mind, and now you've figured out what you want to use it for, you discover that you don't have QUITE enough. So you adapt. Easy.)
***Not sewing in a smooth, intentional line*** For some projects this is not a big deal. For projects where it is a big deal, with most fabrics you can always remove the stitches with a seam ripper and try again as many times as it takes until you're happy. (The fabrics that don't tolerate this are ones with a coating, like pleather or leather, where if you poke a hole then it stays forever. Some really delicate fabrics like satins and fine silks (and sometimes knit fabrics as well) also don't like to be sewn multiple times, but you can usually rub the surface gently or dip it in water and flatten it to dry to get the holes to ALMOST close up. Beginner Reassurance: Woven cotton loves you and forgives you and wants you to succeed. Cotton is friend. Friend cotton. Smooch it. Beginner advice: Trust me, you don't want to sew on that tricky shit anyway. Satin is for masochists who don't take their own advice. Love yourself, stick to woven cottons until you feel confident. Also! Pins will help you sew in a straight line because they'll hold the fabric neatly together. Also, you can use a washable fabric marker to draw the seam lines on with a ruler. If you're VERY VERY VERY new to sewing, I would suggest getting a piece of trash fabric (if you can find a ratty old bedsheet at a thrift store, that's a GREAT thing to practice on), cutting a piece about a foot square, drawing a loooong wobbly meandering line on it with marker or pencil, lots of curves and sharp corners. Then sew along that line with your machine, aiming to get the needle perfectly through the line. This will help you practice manipulating the fabric around curves and corners. Further Advice: Keep your hands flat on top of your fabric on the "table" part of the sewing machine, rather than picking up your fabric with your fingers and moving it around. Just shift it gently with your palms. ***Fabric shifted while sewing and left a gap where the needle didn't go through both layers of fabric*** Hey! What did I tell you about using satin! Put it down and walk away! It is too treacherous for you, traveller! Friend cotton generally doesn't do this to you. Beginner advice: Use pins or fabric clips and this won't happen Beginner reassurance: You can always seam-rip the fucked up bit and try again. <3
***Thread keeps fucking up and getting tangled and snarled on the back of the piece (machine-sewing edition)*** Don't panic, this is not a you problem. You haven't done anything wrong. This happens because every sewing machine has the devil in it. Super normal and happens to everyone. Beginner advice: Remove the thread from your machine and re-thread it, both the top thread and the bobbin. Test it on a bit of scrap fabric to see if that fixed it. If it didn't fix it, try re-threading again and pay close attention to make sure you're doing it right (don't put the bobbin into the bobbin holder backwards, for example). Test again. If that didn't fix it, twiddle the tension knob a bit. If that didn't fix it, open up the part of the machine where the bobbin goes and try blowing the dust and lint out. If THAT still didn't fix it, turn the machine off and go have a cup of tea or a nap. If that STIIIIIIIIILL didn't fix it, replace your needle, it is old and blunt. Beginner Reassurance: I'm holding your hands while I tell you that this is the exact process of troubleshooting you will be using for the rest of your sewing hobby no matter how good you get. Professionals also do this. ***Thread keeps fucking up and getting tangled and snarled (handsewing)*** Also not a you problem. The thread just has too much twist in it. Beginner advice: Just hold up your project and drop your needle so it hangs free on the thread. Run your fingers down the length of it to loosen the twist, the same thing you'd do with the cord of your hair dryer or the vacuum cleaner when it gets twisty. Some people use a little beeswax to coat the thread to help it behave. I've never used that, because just letting it hang and untwist in the air works fine for me. Beginner reassurance: This is normal, just one of those things. You're not bad at sewing.
***Sewed things together with wrong-sides together instead of right-sides together*** Happens to the best of us, especially if you are sewing while tired and bleary. Just undo the seam with a seam ripper and try again. Beginner advice: If you immediately make exactly the same mistake a second time, this is not your fault. This is just a sign from the gods that it's time for a break (all sewists know about this sign, it's a very normal omen). Go to bed, or go eat something. Further advice: If you're making this mistake while well-rested and well fed, maybe your pattern or your fabric is just weird. Try sewing it with a very wide basting stitch, check your work, then sew again with a proper seam. It will at least save you time on ripping it out if it didn't work right again. Beginner reassurance: You're working with friend cotton, right? Then you're fine, you have basically as many chances as you want. :)
***Seam looks bad when I'm looking at the piece inside-out*** Does it look okay from the outside when you turn it right-side-out? Then you have succeeded. Beginner advice: You don't even have to fix this unless you want to. If it's a functional seam, who cares what it looks like inside out? (If you really care, your next step will be to watch some youtube videos about SEAM FINISHING, which is one additional step to make the seams look nice and tidy even inside-out.) ALSO, ironing helps. Iron your seams flat with the right sides of the piece still together just the same way you sewed it, and then fold the two sides apart and iron the seam open, gently pulling the fabric apart as you go so it gets REALLY nice and flat. On curves this is going to take some practice. Just don't do things with curves for your first couple of projects. Make a pillowcase.) Beginner reassurance: It's ok to have an ugly seam, especially as a beginner. No one's going to check the inside unless they're a sewing nerd, whereupon you should bashfully tell them, "This is the first thing I ever made," and they will explode in adoration and praise. Sewing people are like this because we are all a little bit crazy. Every sewist i've ever met remembers VIVIDLY the mistakes they've made while they were learning and the radical self-forgiveness it took to continue learning. A very good sewist is one of the nicest people you will ever meet, because they have made Ten Thousand Mistakes, processed their upset, and kept persevering. They WILL praise your ugliest nastiest most fucked up cotton pillowcase, and they will tell you that you should be really proud of yourself. They will tell you some of the mistakes they've made. They will probably say, "No this is so good, this is way better than the first thing I made when I started!"
***I made a thing but it doesn't fit right.*** Too big? pinch it closed and sew another line. Too small? Rip the seam and add a panel. Beginner advice: Measure twice, cut once. Further advice: Oh, and before you do any cutting or sewing, be sure to pre-wash your fabric on HOT (if you're using cotton; you're using cotton, right? Other fabrics might need something else) so that it can do all the shrinking it's going to do. Beginner reassurance: There's ways to fix every problem, you're not bad at sewing because it doesn't fit right. If you only knew the number of times I made a thing and it didn't fit right.... Ho hum, try again! There are of course other ways to fuck up, but you have to be AMBITIOUS to hit those, and really those are more like... subcategories or more specific flavors of these general ones?
Anyway yeah. Go play with some cotton, fuck around, make a pillowcase. Pay attention to what you're doing and check your work vigilantly at every step. You will be fine. <3
we’re going to have to call smut ‘lemons’ again, aren’t we?
LEMONS!? WHEN THE FUCK WAS THIS?!
oh you sweet summer child
I actually made this a button last convention
Gaud I remember when it was lemons, I feel old now
explain pls
What are lemons??
I don’t own the copyright to this, others own the show. All I have is this saaaad little computer and a sketch pad. ^-^ Please don’t sue! I don’t need anymore stress!
Please R&R!!!!!!!
No flames. >///<
lol this story contains slash! Don’t like don’t read. Rated M. AragornxLegolas. lemon. Lololol ^-^ NO FLAMES OR I WILL KILL YOU WITH MY STABBITY SPORK OF Death! -__-
#this post made me age ten thousand years.
CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM ONLY PLZ THNX
Are literally any of you speaking English???
Limes too tho
O.o no, I can’t relive this! NO!
I’m old enough to have not been sure what ‘lemon’ meant the first time around.
You guys, I know you’re just torturing the n00bs, but I thought I was gonna finally find out!
10k citrus pure fluff, Gundam, 1x2, 1xR, 3x4, 5x13 Rated E unless you think all slash should be M because you’re a butt. Plans for M rating and lemons in future chaps. Don’t Like Don’t Read Concrit only Flames will be deleted.
I still immediately understood this