illogically

Transformers, etc. I write things! Visit me on AO3. This blog can sometimes be NSFW.

[bellamynochillblake]

we’re going to have to call smut ‘lemons’ again, aren’t we? 

[im-reddie]

LEMONS!? WHEN THE FUCK WAS THIS?!

[bellamynochillblake]

oh you sweet summer child 

[fool-errant]

I actually made this a button last convention

[smooththegoofyshark]

Gaud I remember when it was lemons, I feel old now

[butteryswimmingthing]

explain pls

[smooththegoofyshark]

No

[smol-bean-meme-machine]

What are lemons??

[phylix]

I don’t own the copyright to this, others own the show. All I have is this saaaad little computer and a sketch pad. ^-^ Please don’t sue! I don’t need anymore stress!

Please R&R!!!!!!!

No flames. >///<

[lotrlocked]

lol this story contains slash! Don’t like don’t read. Rated M. AragornxLegolas. lemon. Lololol ^-^ NO FLAMES OR I WILL KILL YOU WITH MY STABBITY SPORK OF Death! -__-

[dayoldhakarl-deactivated2021011]

#this post made me age ten thousand years.

[tangolove]

CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM ONLY PLZ THNX

[geekandmisandry]

Are literally any of you speaking English???

[hayloumac-deactivated20220427]

Limes too tho

[somath-cegem]

O.o no, I can’t relive this! NO!

[rhube]

I’m old enough to have not been sure what ‘lemon’ meant the first time around.

You guys, I know you’re just torturing the n00bs, but I thought I was gonna finally find out!

[moniquill]

10k citrus pure fluff, Gundam, 1x2, 1xR, 3x4, 5x13 Rated E unless you think all slash should be M because you’re a butt. Plans for M rating and lemons in future chaps. Don’t Like Don’t Read Concrit only Flames will be deleted.

[perictione]

I still immediately understood this

[perictione]

Hi! I loved "ethics and employee management" - do you have the html/css for the hadron/convoy messages? I'm trying to figure out how to format something similar for a fic of mine and I just can't get it to work! Thank you so much!!

Hi! Thank you so much! Yes would to help! It’s formatted for AO3 using what is called a work skin, which is local css applied only to this fic. To view the html itself: I haven’t had a chance to check the effectiveness on AO3, but you should be able to use the inspect feature (on chrome, named differently on other browsers but I learned it as inspect and can’t remember anything else) to view the html directly.

AO3 has a ton of resources about how workskins work! Check out here for a tutorial and here for the FAQ.

Workskin itself pasted below. My one big tip for formatting html/css on AO3 is to be super careful with italics and other inline text tags. I forget what triggers it exactly but the tag closures must enclose the punctuation following the text or a space will be ‘added’ (it’s not really a space it’s an illusion? Maybe? Not going to test this rn). Telling you this from memory so def do tests first yourself. So instead of “Gosh, I do wish I had brought an umbrella! Darn!” AO3 displays: “ Gosh , I do wish I had brought an umbrella! Darn !”

My other tip is to find a script to do an html conversion. I had one in Google Docs (not made by me) for a while but I have not published anything in four years so 🫡

The Ethics formatting I had to do manually or with a little find/replace of course.

The work skin is itself as follows:

#workskin .courier {

font-family: Courier, "Courier New", monospace;

color: black;

background-color: #f1efef;

}

#workskin .hadron {

color: #324273;

}

#workskin .convoy {

color: #5d70ab;

}

#workskin .letter {

width: 80%;

margin: auto;

}

#workskin div .chat {

width: 80%;

margin: auto;

}

#workskin .cited {

margin-left: 35px;

text-indent: -35px;

}

#workskin .works {

width: 60%;

margin: auto;

}

[aces-to-apples]

Hey just in case anyone was on the fence about going to see Project Hail Mary in theaters or ever this is your sign to go see Project Hail Mary in theaters and also buy it physically. This movie fucks severely. It is immaculately paced, not a single second was I bored or waiting for a scene to finish up. It is incredibly charming, with strong characterization and main characters who are charismatic and flawed and incredibly compelling at every second. The plot is bananas in the best way and every second of it feels reasonable and earned. It's funny as shit, with the entire theater around me laughing out loud at least a dozen times. It's tragic and hopeful and made me at least tear up several times. And it's beautiful and that man's soulmate is a rock and it's the best fucking movie I've ever seen, I would recommend it to absolutely anyone in a heartbeat.

Go see Project Hail Mary!

[bebx]

Reblog if you have contributed to the 17 million fanworks posted on Archive of Our Own ♡

[veliseraptor]

that ‘pakige?’ post but me, a couple hours after posting a fic, like ‘comints?’

[kitten-kin]

[leahazel]

F5 F5 F5

[kitten-kin]

… F5 F5 F5 F5F5F5F5F5

[apricops]

The worst part about writing fantasy is being keenly aware that you’re writing fantasy, which means that you always have to straddle a thin three-way line between anachronism, cliche, and clunk.

Take money, for example. You can’t just have people in a fictional fantasy world walk around using Euros. You consider something generic, like ‘silver coins,’ but before you know it your world starts sounding like a shitty ren faire.

So you think about the world you’ve built and its needs and its history to come up with some unique and relevant terms. But if your terms are too unique and relevant you wind up writing “yarr, you’ll be ransomed for a hundred Trade League Silver Gyrblonks” and realize your worldbuilding is now getting in the way of basic readability.

[shieldfoss]

“They’re using golden valley coins!”

…didst thou mean dollars?

“Nevermind. They’re using some basic silver coin and then enough gold to be worth ten silver coins is called a ten-piece”

…Si, si, el Peso!

Trying over, they’re minted by the king so they’re called crown coins, or, these days, abbreviated, they’re just Crowns

Naturligvis, vi skifter Daler ud med Kroner!

—

The Lesson Of The Day is that all the names are already claimed by IRL, and all the almost-good-names that you could invent to get around that were used by some SFF author in the seventies e.g. I bet you can’t do Suns and Moons for your gold/silver coins, I bet some author did that already.

[garmbreak1]

My fantasy nation uses solid gold coins marked by the dental impressions of the reigning king, as a sign of their purity and authenticity.

They’re called Bitcoins.

[brazenautomaton]

oh you can go the fuck to jail that’s what you can do, where you’ll be shackled to a chain gang hitting the blockchain with a pickaxe

[thedupshadove]

Opera plot: Local Noble realizes that his affections for Pretty Village Girl have a rival in the form of Honest Laborer. Having read enough romances to know that a girl asked to choose between a rich man and a poor man will always pick the poor man, whereas in a love triangle between two rich men it's anyone's game, he decides that his chief object must be to elevate his rival's wealth and status as quickly as possible. What the Compte de Genre-Savie over here forgot to account for, however, was the overwhelming power of the Pygmalion Effect, and now he has to deal with watching two people he's in love with develop ever-stronger feelings for each other. Eventually all of this resolves via...I don't know.

[queenofattolia]

#first of all: ''comte de genre-savie'' is PERFECT. just great. absolutely no notes.#I would love an opera with this exact plot. bonus points if the comte is genuinely genre savvy#he keeps bringing up opera tropes only for the other characters to look at him like he's insane.#the score is diagetic to him; when he points out reoccurring themes or transitions to minor keys#the other characters ask him what the hell he's talking about. the whole chorus gets together to sing about how#comte de genre-savie is going mad. the comte tries to sneak away and keeps getting pulled back in.#I wonder if you could even push it further - have it so that only the comte can speak or 'hear' spoken words;#all other characters communicate in recitativo secco or formally composed songs#then you can have scenes where the comte is speaking but the other character in the scene can't hear him.#this can be played for laughs (the comte tries to order something from a shopkeeper; the shopkeeper walks away as he's talking)#and for dramatic effect (the Honest Laborer is singing a heartfelt duet with the Pretty Village Girl#and neither of them can hear the comte saying 'I love you' in between their lines)#........I am into this actually. I had to convince myself that this wasn't just cyrano de bergerac but no. it isn't. I'm into it.#upon the stage (via @notbecauseofvictories)

[ariaste]

Bonus points if the Comte can also see the stage manager and stagehands. At one point he's like "No listen I'll prove I'm not crazy" and he darts behind a curtain and drags out a woman wearing all black and a headset, with her hair in a messy bun and a clipboard in her hands. He's like, "Tell them I'm not mad." The other characters are like, "🎶HE'S SPEAKING TO GHOSTS 🎶" Stage manager runs off. Comte shades his eyes and peers into the back of the theater where the lighting tech is working. He's like, "Can you bring the house lights up so they can see the audience???" Lighting tech ignores him. The comte is like "FINE!!! It's nearly time for my quickchange, anyway. [to the other characters] WATCH THIS, here's proof, WATCH." And then he stands there stubbornly while the backstage assistants peek in and hiss and gesticulate for him to come get his new costume, and eventually they're forced to scramble out and undress/redress him right there on stage. The other characters are like "GASP!!!!!!! 🎶HE'S A WARLOCK, LOOK HOW HIS CLOTHES FLY FROM HIS BODY BY THE WILL OF HIS UNSEEN DEMON SERVANTS🎶"

Pretty Village Girl and Honest Laborer run off together. Comte falls in love with the stage manager.

[karis-the-fangirl]

My sister and I worked out the perfect cast for Muppet Dracula

[alwaysatomicconniseur]

#the gonzo and rizzo dynamic this implies is rizzo being like ‘gonzo i think we should get out of here’ at every turn#while gonzo is like ‘rizzo don’t be ridiculous’#gonzo: haha wow this castle is so cool and count dracula is such a nice guy!!#rizzo (trembling like a nervous Chihuahua) oh god oh god oh god#gonzo: check it out this guy’s got no reflection! crazy!!#rizzo: gonzo. we are gonna DIE here.#dracula *crawling down the castle like a lizard*#rizzo: GONZO ARE YOU SEEING THIS- wait#gonzo: *crawling down the wall like a lizard too* wahoo!!! (penny-anna)

[nooneknowsyoureadog]

[presentlydean]

online communities are so strange because people slip away so easily. you can be on here for years, folding people you've never met into the fabric of your daily life, and then they disappear, leaving only ghost posts scattered across tumblr behind. or their blog stays dormant, for weeks, months, years, until you're only still following them because you remember that they love sunflowers or they were kind to you when they didn't have to be or the last thing they posted was sad and raw and you still worry about them sometimes.

and sometimes they come back when you least expect it, years later, even, and there's this sudden rush of relief like there you are, there you are, even though you barely knew each other.

there's a strange kind of love to it. i don't know you and i want to hold your hand across miles and time zones and oceans. i can still see the imprint of you in this community you left. you don't think anyone will notice or care when you're gone, but we notice and we care and we wish you well.

i hope you're all okay out there. i hope the sun is shining on your face and you are breathing deeply. i miss you.

[requiem-on-water]

Meteor Shower, oil on panel by Mia Bergeron

[love-leah]

if you're looking for an olympics underdog narrative to get really into can I recommend

[copperbadge]

Hodag: Your pillbox looks like conversation hearts. You've got blue, white, pink, orange...

Me, pointing to the orange Adderall: Don't eat that one, that's meth!

Then I cracked up laughing picturing it:

[caesarsaladinn]

if you're ever wondering what popular media is getting wrong about basically any premodern society, the answer is that there are never enough lawsuits

[caesarsaladinn]

there's a common idea that in the olden days all disputes were resolved through violence, but even in settings where that was true, people would still sue each other about it.

[systlin]

Like 80% of Icelandic sagas involve lawsuits. Sometimes against ghosts.

This worked to get rid of the ghosts, incidentally.

[kuv8sh5]

captain and his princess

[trankinstein]

Less magic schools. More magic universities. Unlearn the simplified models of your secondary education. Discover how to reference scrolls written by a wizard possessed by a different wizard. Identify bias in the voices that whisper from beyond the veil. Have your institution be accused of promoting a Merlinist agenda. Become addicted to energy potions.

[earhartsease]

start an onlyacolytes account to pay for tuition

[probuccalfat]

a lot of ADHD behaviours and barriers feel like sims logic playing out in real time like i did my laundry but i had to pee and sleep so i stopped and i haven’t folded it yet except i can’t fold it yet because i need to eat but i can’t eat because the laundry basket is in front of the fridge. someone keeps queuing actions but they’re getting cancelled

[raptorific]

I still think it’s hilarious that the reason nobody ever figures out Superman’s secret identity or where he lives or what he does when he’s not saving the planet, is because he already told them all the Kryptonian stuff that can’t be tied to any of his human friends or family. I guarantee you the in-universe wikipedia article on Superman lists his name as Kal-El and the “personal life” section says that he lives full-time at his private fortress of solitude at the north pole. Nobody in the world looks at Clark Kent and thinks “oh my god, maybe he’s superman!” for the same reason nobody ever starts to suspect that their coworker who looks KINDA like Barack Obama is actually secretly Barack Obama – They know who Barack Obama is and know what he does and they know their coworker Greg is Greg and not Barack Obama. They have no reason to assume Barack Obama secretly moonlights as Greg The IT Guy at their workplace even though they’ve never seen Greg and Obama in the same place. At best, “Greg is secretly Obama” would be a running joke at the office, and the same is true at the Daily Planet. “Kal-El of Krypton, who lives in a CRYSTAL PALACE at the NORTH POLE and whose dayjob is SUPERMAN, sometimes puts on a suit and pretends to be a clumsy reporter and lives in a one-bedroom walkup in Metropolis” is a ridiculous concept to anyone who doesn’t already know it’s true

[comedowntheroad-blog]

@unpretty

[roachpatrol]

“Hey, that— that guy, in the corner, is that— is that Superman?” 

Clark looks up from his computer at the new intern. “Oh, no,” he says. “You caught me.”

“Clark, you pull this shit every time, man,” his desk neighbor Steve says. “Shut the fuck up.”

“No, the kid’s right, I’m Superman,” Clark says. He gets out of his seat and cracks his back out. “I guess we’re gonna have a superhero fight.”

“Clark, sit back down.”

“Nope. Superhero fight.”

“Clark if you don’t sit the hell back down and finish your article by lunch I am going to tell Perry on you.”

Clark points at the intern. “You get off easy this time, buddy,” he says, and sits back down. 

“So…” the intern says, very lost. “Uh…”

“That’s Clark,” a slightly older and more experienced intern says. “He’s Superman’s asshole twin.”

[beka-tiddalik]

The funniest part is when Clark does this in front of Jimmy Olsen, who is just staring in disbelief as Clark talks about using his superpowers to help Ma Kent on the farm in a sarcastic tone of voice, when Jimmy knows for a fact it’s 100% true, that is what Clark did last weekend.

Intern: “Ahahahah Superman in Kansas tilling the fields at superspeed, that’s a good one. What, if the tractor breaks down, do you just pick it up and take it back to the barn?”

Clark: “Nah, between my ex-ray vision and my heat vision I can generally find whatever the problem is and do a spotweld if necessary so long as I know where to get the parts - once had to nip over to South Korea because I didn’t want to wait 6 weeks for the ship to get there.”

Intern: “Bahahaha classic, Clark you are so funny! Superman fixing tractors with his heat vision, oh that’s a good one.”

Jimmy: “…”