PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Kaledo Art
sheepfilms
styofa doing anything
NASA
taylor price
Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
JBB: An Artblog!
KIROKAZE
art blog(derogatory)
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Discoholic 🪩
$LAYYYTER
DEAR READER
Andulka
Product Placement
JVL
occasionally subtle
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
seen from United States
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seen from China
seen from Malaysia
seen from Brazil
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@phantomofrandom
memorial twin towers themed bong. with two chambers, so you and a buddy can both hit at the same time. theres a plane themed downstem. and when the smoke comes out the mouthpiece it’s like the towers are really getting hit right in front of you.
go ahead. do it. hit the twin towers.
Happy Pride!
Every pride, you must reblog this. No exceptions
I love that four different people on my feed scheduled this joyous person to reblog by 8am on June 1. I look forward to seeing this a dozen more times today.
the way you can resent your parents but also sympathise with and ache for them… so sick
bro oh my god … vanilla extract
vanilla extract smells wonderful but tastes horrific on its own. but mixed with sugar and flour and cream it tastes just like it smells. we need the support of others to reach our full potential
no man is an island everyone is vanilla extract
everytime you reblog this tumblr gets gayer
Ship dynamics :-)
i love how french accents sound so much theyre so funny and delightful. i wish they werent attached to french people
Venom learned about Miette
target audience
oh time for my antidepressant! *sucks ur cock*
villains are hard to design. making them ugly is dangerous, depending on what traits you choose to frame as monstrous or undesirable, you could very well end up saying something fatphobic, racist, anti-semitic, etc
but if you make a hot villain then people will get thirsty and demand redemptions and refuse to acknowledge their evil actions, no matter how despicable
…………..you think?
…………..don’t look up Sauron on AO3
Nothing fails to crack me up like this post - the vain hope that somewhere out there is some awful nasty thing that there is not also a person whose kink that is, the idea that covering something up won’t make people obsessed with finding out what it looks like underneath, the surface level understanding of Sauron and complete lack of knowledge of the Silmarillion and it’s fandom, the fact that Sauron was canonically hot as fuck, the amount of Sauron erotica I have seen, God this post never gets old
The Poster Of The Comment: You don’t see people shipping themselves with Sauron!
The Very Large And Dedicated Community Of Sauronfuckers In The Tolkien Fandom, collectively:
Point. For those who have not read Sillmarilion, Sauron used to look something like this
September 22 2020 - A Hillsboro man convicted to 6 months for drug possession managed to make his escape from the courthouse. A cop trying to stop him gave himself broken ribs and a concussion and had to be taken to hospital, while the hero of our story managed a clean getaway and is still on the loose. [video]
I’ve watched this over and over again and I laugh every time
I’m still trying to figure out what he was hoping to achieve by diving headfirst over the banister like that.
Bold of you to assume cops have any thought process other than “im a cool action hero”
Rolling down the stairs like a fucking slab of ham lmao
I’m at my dog sitting job in a pretty old countryside farm and the lady who does the cleaning up here told me this morning that there are old tunnels (now closed up) running from the house to the church (1km) and I did not want to know that
Imagine what could come from there? Ghouls, ghosts, vampires?
Mammals both produce milk and have hair. Ergo, a coconut is a mammal.
I know you’re being facetious, but this is an actual issue with morphology-based phylogeny.
*leans over and whispers to person beside me* what are they talking about
*leans over and whispers back* Human ability to quantify and categorize natural phenomena is sketchy at best and wildly misleading at worst
consider the coconut
this reminds me of that time Plato defined humans as “featherless bipeds” and Diogenes ran in with a plucked chicken screaming “BEHOLD A MAN!”
i love how you say “it reminds me of that time” like you were there.
listen if an immortal feels brave and supported enough to come out we should respect them
This post is a journey
1 Reblog = 1 Respect
I maintain that humans started attempting classify animals, and some god or another made the platypus, and is still laughing.
Zeus: *hits joint* okay so like. It’s gonna have a duck bill right. But an otter body okay? And then a beaver tail. It’s a mammal. But. It lays eggs!
Hades: wait wait dude. Give it. Give it poison. Make it poisonous
Athena: You mean venomous, and make sure the eggs have both reptile and bird traits. Hermes: *takes the joint* Give it extra senses. Poseidon: It should be aquatic.
I MEAN where’s the lie
Demeter: … And where exactly do you expect me to put this? Everyone: Australia.
Reblogging for that last exchange.
@shanastoryteller
Trainability in cats is a funny thing.
My cats understand and will obey a number of verbal commands, one of which is “go away”. I don’t use it often, but if they’re bugging me and I’m trying to work or doing something that could be dangerous for cats, I can tell them to go away, and off they go - they’ll only keep pestering me if there’s a serious problem they need me to look at.
That said, their idea of a serious problem that requires my attention is somewhat eccentric. Previous instances have included:
There was an unfamiliar car parked across the street
Their water bowl was four inches to the left of its usual position
One of them had puked on the stairs and they didn’t want to walk past it
It was raining
One of them saw a weird bug
These are all very important things that required your attention. They’re doing a good job.
Dogs really aren’t much better. I teach all my dogs the command “show me”. How it works is if the dog needs something but I’m having trouble understanding what exactly they’re trying to tell me, I say “show me” and they lead me to whatever the problem is. Usually they lead me to a real problem (like a toy that got stuck under the couch, their water bowl is empty, etc). But sometimes they want me to fix things like this-
They pulled the covers off my bed and now they want me to put the covers back
They put their ball on top of the ottoman but the ottoman won’t throw it for them
The cat is sleeping and won’t chase them
A flower fell off the potted plant
The cat is sitting in a box and they don’t like it
One of them lost their bandana
The cat won’t take the toy they’re trying to give her
The cat DID take the toy they gave her and now they want it back
These are all very important things that required your attention. They’re doing a good job.
This just in: miscommunication is the key to a stable marriage.
@endoshan holy shit you figured it out
you forgot the best part tho
(via @butchmuppet)
Harbinger
PUPPY HAS RECEIVED SO MANY PETS AND IS ALL WARMED UP NOW
