Random_Human @randomhuman45 - Tumblr Blog

Your love for him was the messiest, silliest, most predictable thing in the universe. And it always made me smile.

Nature Documentary: these deep sea creatures can withstand crushing pressures of thousands of pounds per square inch!

Me: they’re not withstanding a goddamn thing. The pressure is a part of them. Their interiors and exteriors are equalized. Just because your respiratory system is built around a pair of fragile poppable bubbles-

womanenjoyer

like at least 50% of internet lgbt discourse would evaporate if people quit using the term "spaces" when they mean "discord servers" or "tumblr blogs" because we would collectively realize how stupid that shit is

otabekisautistic

“this is a lesbian-only space” no this is the tiktok comments on a chappell roan video

papasmoke

I just want you all to know i am planning to drive across the country to steal this street sign and hang it over my toilet

zitongzi

Dont announced your crimes over unsecured channels dumbass

papasmoke

I've spent the past month cooped up in a motel in Orange County planning my theft, before I steal the sign I will set off a cache of fireworks I've placed 5 blocks away from the nearest police station which will rain down on the pigs, the perfect diversion.

my-flying-sister

I love rebloging. It’s the adult equivalent of showing everyone the cool rock I just found.

the-dandy-liar

tarichaosqueen

So I've been reading 9-1-1 different first meeting fics and there's a couple fake dating fics as well. Two were at a wedding, so I had this idea that I think would be hilarious for canon:

The Buckley family is hosting a family reunion for the first time in like 30 years, Buck and Maddie are invited. Buck doesn't wanna go alone, so he tells Eddie and Chris about it and asks if Eddie will go with him but they can make it a game about who can get people to believe the most outrageous stories.

When they get there, Chris announces to everyone that his two dads are celebrating their 10 year anniversary soon, and he's so glad both of his dads are so happy. Cue the chaos from there. Theo is just there for the food.

It's important to note that Maddie and Chim were not in on this little plan, and Buck and Eddie either intentionally or not, avoid them both for the entire day.

penis-peeper

“no kink at pride!!!” “no leather at pride!!!!” “no bears at pride!!!!” “no nudity at pride!!!!” “no slurs at pride!!!”

just stay home and watch an MCU movie bro

penis-peeper

‘’ PRIDE SHOULD BE KID SAFE!!!!!’’ I agree. every transphobe who wants to control trans kids bodies should be shot on sight.

oh you meant you’re afraid of leather. fucking lame go die

qillermeme

golongbyjoannanewsom

obsessed w this person in the replies

shutyourmoustache

When my mother forgets a word, she is the queen of coming up with new words. Words that would take a third National Treasure movie to fully decipher. I was talking to her yesterday, and she said this: “You know the time for los jibbities is coming up. You must be so excited!” Oh, is it time for los jibbities already? I must have missed it on my calendar. Are we celebrating something? “Of course! We should all be celebrating, shouldn’t we?” OK, so los jibbities is a happy thing. It’s not like something is giving you the heebie-jeebies, which would have been my one and only guess. “Los heebie-jeebies? Now you’re making things up...and this is my show.” You’re right. The time for los jibbities is coming up. Is this a season? “Yes, the season for love. The season for pride.” OK, los jibbities. “Yeah, sound it out.” Los…jibbities. LGBTs! “Sí, mira cuz you’re gay!” “You couldn’t just say pride season? You couldn’t just… *laughs*