food should sound like something delicious

food and recipe blog for @anais-ninja-bitch

[foodffs]

[foodffs]

Sichuan Dry Fried Beef

Follow for recipes

Is this how you roll?

[spaceshipsandpurpledrank]

[tiktoksthataregood-ish]

[spaceshipsandpurpledrank]

[anais-ninja-bitch]

not the moonshine!

[anais-ninja-bitch]

so i showed this to my mom, and here were our findings:

we love her

yes, mama, they do still make kool-aid

we now have a summer project

let it do what it do

[dragongirlsnout]

don't cry okay? huge as fuck bowl of strawberry

[dragongirlsnout]

Don't cry okay? Huge as fuck container of blueberry

[dragongirlsnout]

don't cry okay? huge as fuck bag of blackberry

[dragongirlsnout]

if i had a quantity of raspberries this large i would end up on the news

[biglawbear]

I need to start making cooking tips for all the things I've learned.

The first thing is that you have to preheat your oven, and also your pans on the stove. You think "oh I can just throw Thing in the oven and wait for it to come up to heat" that is the devil talking. Whatever you're cooking, you want it to go in the oven and the oven be a consistent temp and start those tasty chemical reactions that cook your food: crisping edges of veg, causing cookies to rise.

You also have to preheat your pan on the stove. Every time. You think "oh the pan is fine I'm gonna put Thing in it now" and then nothing happens so you turn up the heat thinking the stove needs to be hotter because Thing isn't cooking and then all of a sudden it's too hot and you ruined the Thing. Let the pan preheat. For several minutes. To test if your pan is hot, run your hand under the sink and flick a couple drops of water onto the pan. Sizzling? Good your pan is hot. Water just sitting there? It's not preheated.

Can't tell you how many times I've talked to someone who "can't cook" or "the recipe didn't come out right" and when I asked if they preheated the oven or pan the answer was no.

First rule. Preheat the stuff before you put the food in.

[thosetiktoks]

Credit: perfectopat2

[spaceshipsandpurpledrank]

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[arahir]

Just cause I love sharing this trick for scones, biscuits and the like: when I’m too lazy to cut in the butter, or the butter is a bit too soft etc. you can pop the cream in the freezer until a bit chilled and fully melt the better. Pour the melted butter into the chilled cream while stirring with fork and you instantly get beautiful little pearls of chilled butter that can be poured directly in the dry ingredients. Never have to worry about over mixing again. Very excited to try your recipe btw, thanks for sharing!

wait this is actually inspired... you are an alchemist

[spaceshipsandpurpledrank]

[spaceshipsandpurpledrank]

@tartrazeen

[pennywords]

X

[alexaloraetheris]

Oh, to be a little kitten who just got vaccinated and then taken to a high-end restaurant and tasted the best food the chefs could offer and then fell asleep in a basket.

[lastoneout]

I know this is a tiny part of the wider problems born of diet culture, fatphobia, classicism, and racism but like god the idea that "healthy" food must inherently taste bad has completely ruined us as a society.

[lastoneout]

Every time you feel bad for having coffee with cream and sugar or ranch on your salad or putting extra butter and salt on your veggies I want you to imagine the spirit of John Harvey Kellogg in front of you and then I want you to kill him with a real gun and eat your delicious food in peace.

[sixtwothree]

Sugar cookies by paintedladiespastry decorated to look like a seafood spread.

Source: x

[fuckyeahchinesefashion]

OP: My friend and I, just regular folks, stumbled into this fancy hidden paradise.

[shabbytigers]

the getoastetes Toastbrot post is getting traction and every time i read somebody new’s tags about it i lose my entire shit again. it’s the bit about ungetoastetes Toastbrot that gets me. not only does it look and sound Like That, but also just the deadpan/horror vibe of it

also, #class traitor but i refuse to despise Toastbrot! soft white bread has its use cases

i like heavily seeded whole grain bread from the bakery as much as the next food enjoyer. but in some contexts it strikes an overly assertive note? berlin especially favors a pronouncedly sour style that just doesn’t work very well as, for instance, the buffer to a spiced or strongly flavored meat. (probably because there isn’t any. i mean, i can see how the need for a naan or pita just never comes up. the bread might as well be the most strongly flavored thing on the table! what’s it gonna clash with!) (to my taste, the true rye bread heaven is riga. latvia gets it. also ukraine. but i would go back to riga just to eat rye bread)

also my gi system has occasional fits, during which Vollkornbrot is suicidal and wholemeal is risk-seeking. if one is in a bad way to the point of avoiding fodmaps, top tip, the soft spongy packaged stuff is gentler even than a good bakery white loaf

an advantage of the hilare German nomenclature is that even the haters here readily admit the shit is pretty good if you just toast it

come on

[shabbytigers]

[bookshelfdreams]

It's quite simple really

Bread (Brot, you get this from the bakery):

Toast bread (Toastbrot, bread intended for toasting. It's not meant to be eaten raw.):

Toasted toast:

What's so difficult to grasp about that