Ironically prefers goblins

|Crissy-bi-27| I post shenanigans. if you were here when I was an mtg blog: you are a real one, if not: that's understandable. It's been a while, and you are also a real one :)

[pixiecaps]

big fan of whatever the youth is doing to torment scientology buildings

[pixiecaps]

they couldnt take the heat

[doctordotdj]

[teathattast]

[thickness-protection-program]

Dang rip America

[karlyboyyy]

[dietranch]

ballroom dances

[animentality]

[poppyseed-art]

[sharkgirldick]

Playing Magic the Gathering with a tgirl and I play Mindbreak Trap to exile her spell. She looks at the card, then back to me, then looks away and her face gets really red.

[sharkgirldick]

I should have predicted this.

[neapolitanmilk]

[noahnomore]

[clauonacloud-deactivated2022071]

[latinajedi]

[gay-jesus-probably]

YOU GET THE FUCK BACK HERE AND EXPLAIN THAT RIGHT NOW

[riluri]

well damn

[ospreyonthemoon]

[letslipthehounds]

Every time, I know what's coming, but every time, I just lose it at "Uh. That"

[kyraneko]

I already lost it at "that time we ate our prime minister" and "Uh. That" didn't really help.

[wearemercs]

She was forbidden to handle the feather duster after this incident by scribblesquab

[almightychiru]

Stellar~ 🌟

[almightychiru]

Red carpet ready~ 👗

[kaijuno]

[kittykattaffy]

Yeah, that doesn't prevent pregnancy.

[kaijuno]

Dfgajagakala it’s so you don’t get a UTI 😂

[jabberwockypie]

*facepalm* So, given that sex ed in the US is a tire fire:

Vagina-having people have a shorter urethra, which means we’re more prone to UTIs because the bacteria doesn’t have to travel as far to get up into your bladder and cause a problem.

Which means if you’re exposing your bits to bacteria (as with sex), peeing will flush out bacteria in the urethra. (Urine isn’t actually sterile - that’s a myth - but you’re *supposed to* have a little bit of bacteria - that’s how bodies work. But it still flushes things out that shouldn’t be there.)

Oh! You should ALSO pee after you masturbate, especially if it involves penetration with fingers/toys/etc

[jabberwockypie]

So I’ve blocked like five transphobes on this post, which I feel should have been relatively uncontroversial.

If you’re one of the people saying “You meant ‘women’”, fuck you. I meant “people who have a vagina, regardless of their gender or lack thereof”, and you can go fuck yourself with a cactus.

And you should pee afterward, so you don’t get a UTI.

[silveryoasis]

Lmao! That last line! 😂

[thotsoflore]

Keep this in mind if you recently started having sex again after vaginoplasty. It's a super important habit to get into. Especially if you weren't super careful about it preop.

[calware]

i really love this genre of image

[lunarthesugarglider]

[villaqueen]

The best part of that video is that the owner found the ORIGINAL plush later on the beach and took another video with it after their grandmother stitched it back up

[i-am-a-lonely-nerd]

I love the death grip after the toy was fixed up. Lessons were learned. Try to steal it this time you fucking bird. I dare you.

[katestewartt]

SAY IT LOUDER

[guineapiggies]

Via mrs_larissa_domogalla

[cryptotheism]

I know you want mommy to recreate that lesbisn makeup image but do you know how hard tight lining is? Mommy will partially blind you.

[jame7t]

L + Unskilled Mommy

[cryptotheism]

Kitten I'm not gonna lie mommy is straight ass at this

[reefsharkivist]

[stormtide-leviathan]

I love how they just let an artist say "kaalia should fuck skitheryx" and then make cards for that

[thecrayongal]

these are from the Tragic Romance Secret Lair Set and this is the actual description for the set