[doingitatmybirthdaydinner]

you guys are probably talking about a 60 year old gruff straight man with a beer belly and a can of dip in his cargo shorts who kicks back after a long day of work in his lazy boy by jerking it to lesbian porn. he is not a woman, not even a trans woman, and certainly not a fucking lesbian. he’s probably “transphobic”. even if you’re joking, this is so offensive to actual lesbians because I know you people actually believe that men can be lesbians if they just fetishize us hard enough that they want to be us. imagine genuinely seeing a man fetishize lesbians and lesbian sex and immediately referring to him as she and saying he probably actually is a lesbian and giving him the benefit of the doubt and being sympathetic and sweet towards him. that’s a DUDE! who jerks it to lesbian porn! which is not unique to him or special to him at all! we’re so fucking cooked y’all

[hyeenalady]

before you lecture that lesbian about her lack of attraction to dicks, maybe unpack YOUR discomfort with her orientation. fucker.

[cinnamonflavoredgirl]

no bc nowadays it’s controversial to say that penis is not a vagina and lesbians can’t like men …. ? 😀

[newbieecosocalistboy]

[horsebacteria]

“TERFS are obsessed with genitals”

says the people who threaten suicide if they can’t surgically modify theirs to mimic the opposite sex

[kragehund-est]

people don't like to acknowledge that the "heh LUCKY, where was she when i was in school?" reaction to female teachers predating on male students is primarily because those men are sexist towards women.

yes, she is the abuser and the student is the victim. yes, it is also sexist and gross that they would assume young boys have those sexual feelings towards their abuser. so the RESULT of those comments is harm towards the victims and defense of the abuser.

but the SOURCE of those comments is less that they can't see boys as victims and more that they think women are sex objects, so how could a boy be victimized by a sex object? you can see that because mentions of the victim are always throwaway lines and projection like "eh, he probably liked it anyway" and the mentions of the abuser are rants about how hot the teacher is and how bad THEY want her.

they KNOW boys can be victims, you can see that when there's a male perpetrator. but to those people, it's the same as if you'd said the boy was given a free cheeseburger to eat or a sports car to drive. this is not to defend the abusers in any way at all. this is to explain my analysis of where these comments from come from, and what the result is.

[trans-masked]

Trans guy got a kind of lame tattoo of a uterus and people are saying it’s equivalent to getting a swastika oh my fucking god bro

[woman-respecter]

“we should reframe feminism as [something other than women’s liberation]” <- i’m going to be productive here. i think you should kill yourself.

[scifi0lver]

[g1rluninterruptedd]

this is 1 dangerous, and 2 weird to me. if you know people aren’t going to like that or may not be into that… why wouldn’t you disclose that first?? it’s not that hard. i find it very weird. i dunno. it’s not like you’re entitled to sex. if someone’s not into that, they’re not into it.

[sweetshifter]

This is actually rape by deception, and it's pretty normalised in the trans community. Here are a few examples of tra/trans trying to normalise rape by deception and raping lesbians.

[carbonemissionshater]

Why is it they’re loud and proud about being trans online—literally tagging themselves as such with their faces—and yet want to hide it when they’re trying to have sex? Hmmm

[camomileapplesyrup]

this is genuinely rapey conversion therapy language & i can't believe other lesbians (pick me-bians) enable this rhetoric.

we keep being told that "genital preferences are okay/valid", but this coercive language is what we are met with & what we see. it's like we've forgotten that everything other than an enthusiastic yes is NOT consent.

if everyone is calling the homosexual lesbians expressing concern, transphobic, then how can they say no and practice homosexuality openly?

(keyword is: they can't)

they can jump over hoops & skrt around the definitions of what a penis is, but that won't change our attraction.

[finnishrogue]

a classic rape culture strategy: always try to place the WHOLE responsibility, burden and point of view on the shoulders of the person you're trying to deceive so you can make them sound ridiculous for even falling for your trick, and make everyone forget your own role in all of it.

"oh you didn't notice the entire time? well then it would have never been a problem, don't bring it up anymore!"

"oh you found me attractive at one point? TOO LATE TO SAY NO, YOU ARE ALREADY FINE WITH ME!"

"why would you expect other people to clarify even the most "microscopic" parts of their medical history, as if you need to know or care about it?"

it's so fucking slimy and dishonest because it completely disregards the fact that right here, right now, these trans people are openly admitting this is a deliberate strategy to sleep with people that they KNOW aren't actually into them. these trans people are perfectly aware that being a responsible, caring and empathetic adult that wants to be clear and transparent about their own trans identity would shrink their dating pool, so instead of just accepting that as a normal fact of life (and maybe a part of their journey to full acceptance of who they are), they get fucking excited about the possibility that if they just keep quiet, they can push through people's boundaries and then blame them for not realizing what's happening. like the whole point comes from the idea of staying stealth for as long as you can. like that's what's getting them off more than anything else, that's what's "making them look so much happier".

like you would think it's your actual trans identity itself that gives you pride, not this whole game of "let's see how long it takes for you to notice, teehee".

but no, they don't just jump at the opportunity to do this as much as they can, it's also something they quickly want you to forget about so that they can point the finger at whoever "fell" for it and blame them instead. "you liked it!! you liked it!! don't pretend otherwise!! i said don't you fucking dare withdraw your consent at this point!! you fell for it!!"

i could never imagine being this antisocial, this dismissive of other people's boundaries, this triumphant over the fact that i managed to find a way to wiggle into someone else's dating pool without them noticing i am present. like it doesn't fucking matter if they can or cannot tell, the problem is and will forever be that i KNEW they would have said no, and i decided to disrespect that anyway.

i could simply never be like that. i do not get sexual enjoyment from using other people as my personal toys. i do not get off to power imbalances or cheating. i do not think it's fun to only have sex in a dark room where the other person can't really tell what i actually look like. i don't think it's sexy to have to wait in fear for the moment they notice something being off.

i don't think it's satisfying to know that the other person is only with me for as long as they don't know who i really am. i could never settle down with such an inferior dating experience.

but maybe that's only because i am not male.

rip to these rapist males but i am different.

[uvb76fan]

trans women are multiple times more likely to be sex offenders than cis men btw

[carbonemissionshater]

“What if they’re just identifying as women to be in a women’s prison? “ then gender identify has become a means for sexual predators to be incarcerated with women

[fact-fem-deactivated20221001]

If trans women would just acknowledge that they're men who alter themselves to look like women, in order to ease dysphoria, I wouldn't have a problem with it.

I'm all for men wearing skirts. I'm all for men enjoying whatever stereotypically feminine things they enjoy. I'll even support medical transition, provided you're over eighteen, understand the health risks, and have faced persistent dysphoria.

The problem is that they've redefined "woman" to be a feeling. I can no longer use "woman" to discuss the tangible reality of having a female body. Presenting as women isn't enough for them, they have to be women.

Not only does this erode my ability to discuss sex-specific issues, but it leads to self-identification policies that allow men into female-only spaces. Female-only spaces that were created because of the physical threat men pose to women.

I was accused of "driving a shiv between cis and trans women," when I tried to discuss how cis women, face different issues from trans women. I didn't even say that trans women aren't women, but acknowledging a difference at all was enough to elicit hostility. (Their follow-up sentence was, "Someone should drive a shiv through you.")

My issue with the trans movement isn't dysphoric individuals trying to feel comfortable, but the denial of how biology impacts our lives.

[enoby-terfness-dermatitis-way]

A rose by any other name would smell as sweet and a female by any other pronouns would still be oppressed in a patriarchy

[femalegrandma]

[dapperprincess]

women: i choose the bear because the way men are capable of raping, murdering, or even enslaving us is all far worse than being eaten alive or left to bleed out

this man: I choose the bear because female humans have said mean things to me

[fretami]

once again:

women are afraid of men because of the violence they inflict on us

men are afraid of women because their feelings get hurt

[kkoffin]

ironically this is the most male socialised thing this guy could’ve possibly said

[noblackwomannocry]

"love every trans woman before it's too late" and the "every trans woman" is trans women with pedophilic/zoophilic/rape fetishes and the "too late" is before her blog gets deleted for user guidelines violations for the 20th time

[moralintern]

some people are like I'm too much of a person to be a woman

[dreichsmirr]

As a woman in a fair few male dominated spaces, nothing annoys me more than seeing men come into a female dominated space like 'oh I'm so scared, I'm so worried. Is there space here for little old me? Will you welcome the smol bean that is me?"

Because 90% of the time they're just attention seeking and also a woman can't do that in a male space because it would count against her immediately. Women in male professions/hobbies have to bravado everything. You know you're not welcome, and you have to force them to even give you a chance, and they fight you at every step.

If I turned up to my motorcycle school with the "I'm a nervous widdle baby pls validate me" attitude that men turn up to our crafting group with, then they wouldn't have let me in the door.

Women can't show any weakness, men get to act like fucking babies and receive fawning compliments and welcomes.