path of the drunken master but instead of booze and drunken swaying its coffee and hyperactive jittering
This is just me after a gallon of death wish coffee
we're not kids anymore.

tannertan36

Love Begins
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Xuebing Du

祝日 / Permanent Vacation

#extradirty
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ

★

ellievsbear
$LAYYYTER

Discoholic 🪩
taylor price
Today's Document

shark vs the universe

Origami Around
almost home

Kaledo Art
Claire Keane
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
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@souldevowerer98
path of the drunken master but instead of booze and drunken swaying its coffee and hyperactive jittering
This is just me after a gallon of death wish coffee
It’s fucking WILD to me how some people follow Critical Role. Like. How? Where do you pull all your time from? What eldritch being have you sworn allegiance to to grant such boons of time?
The first campaign of Critical Role has a greater run time than THE ENTIRE PAST THIRTY YEARS OF THE SIMPSONS.
Just process that. You could run Critical Role and The Simpsons simultaneously and you would still run out of Simpsons before you finished Critical Role.
That is insane. That is too much time to comprehend.
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHOOOOWWWWW
1.15x speed on YouTube: it is your friend
Just setting aside Thursday evenings for relaxation, listening while you eat dinner, do crafts, plan your next d&d session, etc, and trying not to miss more than one episode in a row
The podcast and a work that allows me to listen to podcasts for the entire time
When I first discovered critical role I binged campaign 1 up to episode 98 I think on YouTube in about 3 weeks to catch up while I worked as I work night shift and they don't care what we listen to. After that I made sure to listen/watch every Thursday while I work or relax if I'm off.
[ Find your better self. He is still there. ]
Don’t think I need to tell yall how hard that one hit. The feelings and lines those folks improvise at that table!!!?
(Words: Quotes & additions by me)
my interpretations of laura and taliesin’s descriptions! apologies for the messy sketches! :’) which outfit would you most want to wear?
(edit: also yes, there is no pirate hat I’m sorry!! maybe in a future drawing!)
I love these!!! I'd wear Caleb's outfit.
Goodness, look at the time! I was supposed to be rambling about Caduceus Clay HOURS ago.
There’s this moment in episode 96, when Caduceus is instructing Calliope to return to the grove in his stead and plant the crystal, where she says, “Hopefully you’ll come back to a safer homestead.” And he says, with some bite, “Then you can leave.”
And she replies, “Well…yeah.” And he folds completely.
That interests me.
I’ve been thinking a lot about status quos, the assumptions of the Clay family, and how they have spent ten years in literal stasis. How Matt takes care to point out that their relationships (innocently, so he puts it) haven’t developed past a very simple parents-and-children dynamic, despite being goddamn adults (excepting Clarabelle, who is a teenager; she seems to be about as sophisticated as Luc, a 5-year-old). It’s pretty established, at this point, that they would have gone on as they were indefinitely, if the Grove had not begun to die. They were frozen before they ever set foot in the menagerie.
Liam said something insightful on Talks, which is that, putting aside the fantastical relative age of something as long-lived as a firbolg (Caduceus is around a century old; that makes him like. Twenty-one.), that is a lot of time to spend with one group of people, in some few-square-miles of forest. So much time to wear grooves into the pattern of your life.
One of those patterns: Caduceus would remain at home, always, the good child, the dependable child. A comfort to his parents.
Now he’s getting drunk, attending high society parties, keeping the company of pirates and mob bosses. Spending multiple platinum on a new outfit just because he can. And he doesn’t want to go home.
The Clay family (including Cad, at first) essentially went on this quest to try and turn back the clock. A return to status quo. So, Calliope assumes that her brother is going to do what he’s supposed to, and then everything can go back to the way it was. He can stay at home and make their parents happy; why should anything have changed?
Why should her little brother want anything more?
But Calliope wasn’t alone in that grove for a decade.
At this point, the main drive of Cad’s character is that he has changed. He literally says he doesn’t know who he is anymore. Because he lived those ten years, and then he found the Nein and went on adventures with them, the scope of which his family hardly seems capable of imagining (Empires and dynasties! Cults! Multiple encounters with dragons! He died!).
And yet. Calliope says, “well…yeah.” And, “maybe some family time will do you good” (as if the influence of his friends is a bad cold he has to weather out), and he seems…resigned? Accepting of that? He breaks eye contact and says, “You’ve wanted it longer than I have.”*
Like, yes, he can have his cute little gap year of self-discovery, but then certainly he’ll be back to the grove. And certainly he’ll go back to putting what other people want first. And certainly he won’t leave again.
Maybe right now, he thinks so. I’m not so sure.
Anyway. Big Last Unicorn vibes.**
*it’s interesting that Caduceus can only admit to wanting something in the context of, ‘but so-and-so wants/deserves it more, so.’ And by interesting I mean get therapy, Mr. Clay.
**tfw you go on an epic adventure to save your disappeared kin only to find yourself altered forever by the experience, and by the time you’ve defeated the nightmare bull that’s keeping them prisoner you just know that you aren’t like them anymore, and the quest which began to end your solitude has ended with you more alone than ever. Vibes.
I love this aspect of Caduceus. The whole put others before myself thing, yet I feel like he may be the one in the end of the story to go home just to say he'd like to keep helping others in the world like he's been. Not telling his sister to stay but maybe go with her and help her along through the nightmares of the world and I feel his parents would accept that for both of them as long as they both bring their stories home to share with the family.
However these are just the vibes I've been getting from them since he talked with his family in the menagerie and right before sending them home.
A crooked merchant with a carefree attitude and a winning smile. He travels in a large wagon filled with all kinds of magical items and weapons designed to catch the eye of the many adventurers on the road. With his natural fast-talking and magical abilities, he has not met a person not willing to buy from him. However, his goods are far from what they appear. Every item in the cart is a mimic. Mimics that have been highly trained for one purpose, kill the adventurers that buy them and then come back to Edwin.
Where did Edwin get so many mimics? How did he train them? How many people have fallen for his game?
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All an evil dm would have to do to really scare their players is have this character sell the party a bunch of healing potions.
1d10 Fey quirks
A strong floral scent suffuses the air around them, so much so as to be overwhelming.
A shimmer around their body, as though they were a mirage.
Wherever they lay their hand, new blades of grass and other plants spring up.
The heady tang of red wine fills your mouth whenever they speak.
The air grows colder in their presence, fogging your breath.
Their laughter is underscored by birdsong, or perhaps that’s wind chimes? Hard to say.
Their glamour flickers every time you blink, changing their appearance almost imperceptibly each time.
A lavender sheen seems to obscure your vision when you look at them.
A buzzing, the pins and needles of a limb fallen asleep, takes over your hands where they brushed their hair.
They are forever trailed by spectral snowflakes or leaves.
all d10 lists
Reposting just to have easy access to all these d10 lists. They are amazing!
DM: Time to get out the Monster Manual, or as some people like to call it: the Waifu Catalogue.
Me: WHAT.
Sometimes I smash or pass the whole book
What the fuck guys
I like to smash or pass monsters in DnD and Pathfinder books.
BugBears are legit.
can we not
@celestial-guardian-ragnarok @chika-ann
Smash or pass
Heh… that depends… what’s on the list
dogs
there are dogs on that list
you wanna fuck a dog
wait
this is tumblr
don’t answer that
dogs? pass.
Liches tho……. ;)))
That’s actually not a terrible entry to thirst after. I mean, you could technically count it as necrophilia, but its consensual necrophilia, so you do you.
What the fuck
Of all the reblogs and additions to this post, this is the one you’re shocked by?
Consensual necrophilia is not a phrase I thought I’d hear. Then again this is tumblr, so maybe that’s on me
Hot take: the term consensual necrophilia also applies to vampires, since they’re undead creatures. Wanna fuck Strahd? You’re in the same boat with the lich fuckers.
However, what I think the real treasure we’re all sleeping on is liches….in love. Just immortal wizard gals being pals.
I am absolutely here for the immortal undead lesbians
IS IT STILL NECROPHILIA IF YOU’RE DEAD TOO??
I don’t think so?
Ok next topic is a dragon and a human beastiality for the dragon?
both are sentient, so its just interspecies sex.
…I am now reminded of that argument I got into about whether or not a half-dragon would have a cloaca.
This post is an entire dungeon of bad decisions at this point
I think you mean legendary decisions
Legendary for being bad
This is not what i expected when i started this blog
To be fair, i wasnt expecting a whole lot when i started this blog in 2014
But it definitely didnt include 10k notes of thirsty monsterfuckers
11 approaching 12 thousand
Fuck you’re right
ok but can we just talk about abberations cuz like they’re intelligent and adults but their minds are inscrutable to humans. so like does that mean you can consent to sex with them? cuz you’re on wayyyy different levels of intelligence? but also they’re an adult with the capacity to give and understand consent? but could a normal sentient’s mind comprehend consenting to sex with them? help me out here i’m confused.
If both parties are sentient, its just interspecies sex, stop trying to overcomplicate things. Just because one species is better at calculus does not complicate the less intelligent species’ capacity for consent.
true but in most fiction an abberation’s mind functions in a completely different way from a non-abberation. essentially what i meant to point out was the potential issue of blue and orange morality
Are you seriously trying to start a philosophical debate on this post?
Like, I admire the chutzpah, dude, but it doesn’t matter if one species has a totally alien concept of everything. If both parties know what they want, communicate what they want, and agree with each other on it, its fully informed consent on each side and therefore just regular interspecies sex. Sentience is sentience, even if the way it manifests is wildly different.
honestly? i was drunk out of my mind both times i saw this post. also you make a very good point and are correct that flavors of sentience aside, as long as both parties are sentient and consent it’s fine. i apologize for drunk me’s ramblings.
… you get philosophically argumentative when you’re drunk? Thats a mood, my friend
what even is this post
Not sure. I lost it somewhere and I’m not sure where. Did it change from one subject to another or is it just me not understanding?
D&D logic & arguments
this post is a disaster and a tragedy and the essence of both D&D and Tumblr, what do y’all want from me
…wooooow
This post is truly a journey and yet if we look back to the innocent times of that original post we must all find ourselves reflecting: what did OP expect was going to happen?
Honestly? I didn’t really have any expectations. I figured, “hey, my DM said something stupid and funny, perfect, I’ll put it on the blog with the rest of the stupid and funny things people say in my D&D games,” and figured that would be that.
That being said, this is the Dungeon of Bad Decisions. As in, there are no good choices made here.
Also my IRL dump stat was probably Wisdom. I definitely have at least a -2 to Perception and Insight, I can tell you that. Forethought is not ny specialty.
Okay but this does raise the question of hyper-inteligent races with incredibly long lifespans. For instance, if a horny bard was trying to screw a god, from the bard’s perspective they’re both mature adults. However, by the standards of the god who has lived for millions of years and has a mind the size of a galaxy, the bard may be just a child. So, assuming the god consents, what would the implications of that be?
Now if you excuse me I need to go bleach my brain and stop thinking about this.
Ok but was it really necessary to make us suffer with you
Did the potential for eldritch pedophilia really need to be put out on the internet
Yes, yes it did.
I’d argue to follow the harkness rule, as long as both the god & the mortal are considered adults for their species, its not pedophilic.
In the same vein, if an elf was 300 years old and a gos was like 5000 but the age of majority for that pantheon is 6000 then it is pedophilic.
But what if, even though the mortal is technically a mature adult, the god doesn’t see them as such? Sure, at that point it wouldn’t technically be wrong, but still…
Made the mistake of sitting for half an hour reading the notes after reading this post. Now I send out the knowledge of this post and its depravity to any of you who haven't seen it already.
theres something very funny about people writing these rich and detailed backstories for dnd characters as if the characters aren’t gonna still be level 1 when they start
“my elf has been alive for a thousand years and has won ten thousand battles!!!” you’re still level 1 aint ya i guess you those ten thousand battles you won werent all that hard to win
i know this sounds all grumpy but i legit mean it when i say it is hilarious when someone writes it in to their backstory that they were the Smartest Mage on the Planet that has researched magic for A Thousand Centuries and then the game starts and they’re like “yeah i know fireball whats up”
the more detailed your character’s backstory is and the more you boast about the character’s competence and abilities, the funnier it becomes when you roll a 1 and your character just drops their sword and shits themselves. president of the dwarves for six centuries and you just shit yourself in a bar you were trying to find work in.
Like I know that this is a Goof Post™ and that you’re generally not supposed to try to offer any explanations for stuff like this for fear of Ruining The Joke™ but I feel like people do this because they fundamentally misunderstand what their character’s backstory is actually for.
The most interesting and compelling part of a character’s life is supposed to be the story you’re going to tell; you’re defeating the object by shoving all of the cool shit into their backstory. The actual purpose of the backstory is to inform your character’s behaviour and choices and the way they react to things so you can play/write them consistently! A solid backstory is a great way to make your character a whole person with a personality that makes sense.
tl;dr - A “cool” backstory doesn’t necessarily make for a cool character. It’s less about who they’ve been and what they’ve already done than it is about who they might become over the course of the story you’re going to tell with them.
hey! this! this is really really good advice for players!
Hot take: Wish is the most balanced spell in the game
To clarify, this is because the DM is explicitly encouraged to screw with the outcome in any way they want. Due to this, if the DM is smart, Wish cannot possibly break the game unless the DM wants it to, while also causing the players to be conservative with their uses of it.
30 Items
Viper Blade: An ornate sliver dagger with a hilt inlaid with emeralds. The blade itself has a faint green sheen. Deals an additional 1d6 poison damage.
Brew Of The Silver Tonge: A bottle of a shimmering sliver liquid. It tastes like mint and vanilla. Drinking it provides a +3 bonus to all charisma checks for one hour.
Cold Heart Locket: A heavy silver heart shaped locket, engraved with a pattern of thorns. It no longer opens. Wearing it gives advantage against persuasion on performance.
Raptor Talon: The talons of an ancient beast, fashioned into a glove. Deals 3d6+STR slashing damage.
Mechanical Owl: A bronze owl with onyx eyes. Animated with magic. Acts as an animal companion and on a players turn can make an attack with it’s talons, dealing 2d4 slashing damage. It also can record recent events and provides it’s owner with advantage on history checks.
Burning Gloves: Enchanted golden gloves that become skintight when worn, no matter the size of the wearer. They glow red hot and when used with a melee weapon will deal an additional 2d6 fire damage.
Flask Of Soup: A battered canister of warm, homemade chicken noodle soup. Drinking it fills you with joy and warmth and it heals 1d6 of your health. It has 1d4 charges per day.
Imperious Crown: A grand golden crown encrusted with rubies. It allows a player to cast command once per day and gives advantage on intimidation.
Sky Spear: An electrum spear that glow a pale blue. When used, it is engulfed in crackling electricity and deals an additional 3d6 lightning damage
Aegis: A massive shield emblazoned with the face of Medusa. Adds a bonus of 3 to intimidation and armor class.
Spell Specs: A pair of glasses with round lenses. One is tinted a soft pink, the other a blue green. These glasses allow the wearer to cast detect magic at will.
Whispering Tome: A battered leather-bound book written in a long forgotten language. Acts as an arcane focus for wizards. Once a day it can whisper its knowledge to the holder, giving them +4 on any wisdom check.
Cold Snap: A whip encrusted entirely in ice. Deals an additional 2d4 cold damage.
True Strike: A great sword that glows a soft gold, etched with runes. Every other attack made with this sword is a critical hit.
Leather Jacket: Shockingly, its a leather jacket. It provides a +3 in charisma and allows the wearer to cast charm person once daily.
Thorny Collar: A necklace of iron shaped into a pattern of thorns. Allows the wearer to cast vicious mockery at will.
Thanatos Scythe: An intimidating blade of black iron that emits a pulsing purple glow. It’s handle is bone from an ancient eldritch beast. It deals the typical 2d4 slashing damage with a bonus 3d8 necrotic damage.
Bone Crusher: A greatclub embedded with countless thorns. Deals an additional 1d6 piercing damage.
Trickster Ring: A ring of jade carved into the shape of a snake. Allows the wearer to cast misty step 1d4 times a day and provides a +2 bonus to stealth and slight of hand.
Healing Salve: A small jar of a sweet smelling green paste. When applied a player recovers 1d8 heath and is considered to have had a long rest. There is enough in the jar for 5 uses.
Brightblade: A shortsword that glows a brilliant white, so much so that it hurts to look at it. It deals an additional 2d8 radiant damage.
Corrosive Grenade: A grenade emblazoned with a biohazard symbol. Deals 1d6 force damage and 1d6 acid damage.
Stygian Waters: A pitcher of black water from the rivers Styx and Cocytus in the underworld itself. It burns, freezing, down your throat. When swallowed, it renders the player immune to cold damage for their next three turns OR allows them to cast cone of cold once.
Fleetfoot Boots: Soft leather boot with the outline of wings stitched into the sides. Raises a players base speed by 10ft and adds a +1 bonus to stealth checks.
Artemis Axe: A battle-ax with crescent moon blades. Has a +2 attack bonus and deals an additional 1d8 radiant damage.
Cruel Hammer: A semi-sentient Warhammer with a bad attitude. As it is swung it shouts insults and the target must make a wisdom saving throw of DC 15 or take an additional 1d6 psychic damage.
Light Fingers: Pale blue gloves. Provide advantage on sleight of hand.
Shifter Bone Powder: The powdered bone of a shape shifter allows you to cast disguise self. There is enough for 10 uses.
Storm Orb: A glass sphere that swirls with a miniature hurricane trapped inside. It fits in the palm of a hand. When shown, it will shatter and deal 1d6 force damage, 1d6 lightning damage, and 1d8 thunder damage.
Brainiac Glasses: Heavy, square and black rimmed glasses with dense lenses. Adds a +2 to intelligence but a -2 to charisma.
5e Backgrounds: 8 Backgrounds For Your D&D Character...
Commoner
You come from a humble social rank, perhaps working as a farmer, servant, or laborer.
Although your background is not as glamorous as others, you find it easy to blend in wherever you go and have a sort of folksy wisdom that can sometimes help you out of a jam.
When you choose this background, choose a profession that is found among the common folk, or roll a d20 and consult the following table to determine your particular expertise.
d20 Result
1–2 Fisher
3 Forester
4–7 Laborer
8–11 Messenger
12–16 Serf
17–18 Servant
19 Shepherd
20 Trapper Skill Proficiencies: Investigation, Persuasion
Trait — Salt of the Earth: Since you come from the ranks of the common folk, you fit in among them with ease.
You can find a place to hide, rest, or recuperate among commoners, unless you have shown yourself to be a danger to them.
They will shield you from the law or anyone else searching for you, though they will not risk their lives for you.
Suggested Equipment: Common clothes, iron pot, spade, tool kit (appropriate to your profession), 14GP, 4SP.
Guide
You know the wilderness like the back of your hand.
You have spent many days and nights in the wild, sometimes traveling on your own but more often leading others along rarely used tracks and paths.
Skill Proficiencies: Choose two from Animal Handling, Athletics, History, Medicine, Nature and Survival.
Trait — Wanderer: You have an excellent memory for maps and geography and can always recall the general layout of terrain, settlements, and other features around you.
In addition, you can find food and fresh water for yourself and up to five other people each day, provided that the land offers berries, small game, water, and so forth.
Suggested Equipment: Backpack, bedroll, hempen rope (50 ft.), tent, tinderbox, traveler’s clothes, waterskin, winter blanket, 40GP, 8SP.
Guild Thief
You made a living by stealing as a member of a thieves’ guild.
The guild is similar to a modern organized crime syndicate.
It exacts protection money from criminals and businesses alike, and uses its influence to keep the city watch focused on apprehending criminals who operate without the guild’s blessing.
Necessity might have driven you to this work, having no other means to provide for yourself, or you might have been an orphan taken in by a thieves’ guild.
Whatever your reasons, you learned how to slip into places where others would prefer you not go, neutralizing traps, locks, and sentries with uncanny skill.
Skill Proficiencies: Investigation, Stealth.
Trait — Thieves’ Cant: Among thieves, there is a secret language, a combination of jargon words and secret signs that members of the criminal underworld know and use.
Creatures hearing you converse in Thieves’ Cant might think you say one thing when you are actually saying something else entirely.
You have learned the secret language of thieves.
You can correctly interpret thief signs and doublespeak, and you can communicate in this manner to others familiar with this language.
Suggested Equipment: Thieves’ tools, lampblack, oil can, breeches with secret pocket, small steel mirror, belt pouch, 18GP, 4SP.
Jester
You were employed as a jester by a noble.
You performed acrobatic stunts, told jokes and stories, and provided entertainment for your employer and his or her guests.
However, you also served a key role, lacing your entertainment with criticisms and observations too controversial for others to speak aloud.
Skill Proficiencies: Acrobatics, Performance
Trait — Licensed Fool: You enjoy the rare privilege of speaking your mind with little concern for repercussions.
As a jester, it is your duty to use comedy to point out the absurdities of the world.
You can criticize through the lens of humor without offense.
In addition, you can gain access to nobles in order to perform.
When traveling, you can usually find a meal and a place to stay in the local castle or manor house in return for a performance.
Suggested Equipment: Jester’s motley, tin scepter, musical instrument (your choice), book of bawdy poems and jokes, traveler’s clothes, 38GP.
Knight
You have successfully completed your training as a squire and earned the title of knight.
Your title carries many responsibilities, and you are expected to behave in a chivalrous manner, protect the innocent, and mete justice across the land.
You might be sworn to a noble house or be a wandering knight, questing for some prize or glory.
Skill Proficiencies: Choose two from Athletics, History, Insight, Intimidation, Perception, Religion and Survival
Trait — Knight’s Station: When you are among nobility or some other group that would recognize your station as a knight, you can expect to receive free accommodations and food for yourself and your adventuring companions for the duration of your stay.
Certain nobles might decline, but this is a serious breach of etiquette and usually has social consequences.
Suggested Equipment: lance, token of affection, signet ring, sealing wax, light warhorse with saddle and bridle, grooming kit for horses, feed (seven days), traveler’s clothes, 32GP, and 5SP.
Minstrel
You wander the land performing music, telling tales, and entertaining audiences with your talents.
Rarely does a community not welcome you in, as you bring news of distant lands to the common folk.
Skill Proficiencies: Performance, Persuasion
Trait — Noted Performer: You can always find a place to perform, usually in an inn or tavern.
At such a place, you receive free lodging and food (within reason) as long as you perform each night.
In addition, your performance makes you something of a local figure.
When strangers recognize you in a town where you have performed, they typically take a liking to you.
Suggested Equipment: Fine clothes, ink, musical instrument (your choice), paper (five sheets), traveler’s clothes, 27GP.
Priest
You have pledged your life to serve a god, pantheon of gods, or philosophy.
You serve as an intermediary between your chosen power and the mortal world, conducting sacred rites, offering sacrifices, and expounding the teachings of your faith to those you meet.
When you choose this background, select a deity or power.
Your knowledge and experience is drawn from your time as a priest in the service of that faith.
Skill Proficiencies: Religion, Insight
Trait — Temple Services: You belong to a specific temple dedicated to your chosen power.
You have a residence there, and you can perform religious ceremonies and offer sermons drawn from the sacred teachings of your faith.
While near your temple, you can call upon acolytes and fellow priests for assistance, provided the assistance you ask for is not hazardous and you remain in good standing with your temple.
Additionally, when you are in a location that has a temple, shrine, or other presence of your faith, you can expect to receive free healing, care, and religious services for yourself and your adventuring companions from others aligned with your faith.
Suggested Equipment: Holy symbol, flask of holy water, ink, ink pen, paper (ten sheets), vestments, 3GP, 9SP, 8CP.
Thug
Years of being a street tough have given you an aura of menace.
Your look communicates a basic message to those who annoy you: You’d as soon break their knees as receive an apology.
Threats and bullying tactics come easily to you.
Your demeanor has landed you jobs with less-than-reputable organizations in the past, where you’ve provided both protection and muscle.
Skill Proficiencies: Intimidation, Athletics
Trait — Bad Reputation: No matter where you go, people are afraid of you due to your connections to the dangerous criminal underworld or your history of violence.
When you are in a place of civilization, you can get away with minor criminal offenses, such as refusing to pay for food at a tavern or breaking down doors at a local shop, since most people will not report your activity to the authorities.
Suggested Equipment: Sap (equivalent to club), tattoo, half of a set of manacles, common clothes, 28GP, 4SP.
Cool stuff, I like it
Homebrew Distillery: Plague Domain Cleric
For as long as gods have healed mankind, they have also sent diseases to put them in their place. Some gods, like Apollo, even juggled the duty of both healing and diseases. As a Cleric of the Plague Domain, you serve the dual function of both spreading and healing diseases as commanded by your deity.
1st Hex, Ray of Sickness 3rd Melf’s Acid Arrow, Ray of Enfeeblement 5th Stinking Cloud, Vampiric Touch 7th Blight, Sickening Radiance 9th Cloudkill, Enervation
Bonus Proficiency:
When you choose this domain at 1st level, you gain proficiency with Medicine if you don’t already have it.
Immune System Overhaul
At 1st level, you become immune to poison and diseases. You resist poison damage.
Channel Divinity: Pests of Pestilence
Starting at the 2nd level, as an action, you can present your holy symbol and cast the spell Conjure Animals at third level. Creatures summoned in this way are riddled with disease. Their creature attacks deal an additional +2d4 poison damage that is magical for the purposes of overcoming resistances. They have a chance to poison those they attack. When the disease-ridden animals die, they risk spreading their sickness. Creatures within 5 feet of the animal when they die make a Constitution saving throw against your spell DC. On a failed save, they become poisoned. If the animals summoned this way are served and eaten, they are treated as rotten food. Casting Purify Food and Drink makes them safe to eat.
Sickening Aura
Beginning at 6th level, when a living creature you can see declares an attack on you, makes a saving throw, or a skill check, you can use your reaction to make them feel sick and nauseous, imposing a disadvantage on their roll. Creatures that can’t be infected with diseases are immune to this feature. This feature can be used equal to your Wisdom modifier. Once this feature has been used, you can’t use it again until you finish a long rest.
Noxious Casting
You have become so steeped in diseases that your very spells have become disease-ridden. Starting at 8th level, when you cast a spell of 1st level or higher, deal an additional 1d4 poison damage x the spell slot of the spell used. Creatures within range of the spell must make a Constitution saving throw or become poisoned.
Malefic Epidemic
Starting at 17th level, when creatures die while under the conditions of disease or poison, creatures within 10 feet must make a constitution saving throw or else contract the exact same conditions as the creature that just died. Infected creatures killed by Fire damage do not spread their epidemic further. If a creature that died with a disease is resurrected as a zombie, their animated corpse will still harbor the disease that killed them. Their bite deals an additional 1d8 necrotic damage, and can transfer whatever diseases they had in life to their victim upon a failed Constitution save.
It is admittedly weird that the Plague Domain doesn’t have the Contagion spell hardwired to its domain spells list, but I tend to prefer filling subclass spell lists with spells that fit the theme but aren’t available on that spell list. Contagion is a Cleric spell, so there’s no love loss in not picking it because any Plague Cleric worth their salt will pick it up anyway. Something I really like about this build is that thanks to Noxious Casting, you can cast Control Weather and essentially make it rain contaminated water over an entire city. And with Malefic Epidemic, it’s entirely possible to hit one person with the Contagion spell, have them die, and then spread that Contagion through an entire encampment. Worried about fighting an entire troop of strength-based orcs on the field of combat? All it takes is one case of filth fever, and by the time the battle begins, a good portion of that orc troop will be swinging strength checks with disadvantage. Spread Slimy Doom instead, and not only will their low constitution throws make them easy targets for your poison spells, but they’ll also become stunned every time they’re hurt, rendering a large chunk of that orc troop virtually helpless on the battlefield. This entire build is primarily focused on debilitating one’s enemies and making them easier to annihilate, and I think I’ve done that. Granted, it may need to be better balanced. If so, I’ll probably delete this post and repost it with the altered balance.
My Love Domain Cleric doesn’t show up when you search my Tumblr, so I’ll link it here. [Homebrew Distillery: Love Domain Cleric]
Alternatives to "You meet in a tavern"... Reblog and add your own!
You all awaken, dazed and confused, locked in adjacent, subterranean prison cells.
You’ve been kidnapped and are currently on a ship to be sold as slaves.
You wake up outside the tavern with the worst hangover you’ve ever had.
You meet in a temple, having been given instructions to meet there by a great hero.
You wake up in a giant nest, next to a clutch of eggs, each as big as a man, and all shuddering ominously...
You’ve been summoned to sit on a high council that will decide the fate of one of the most powerful evil magical artifacts in the land. A Ring, some might call it, the one ring.
You all are sucked through portals on an average day in your life and dropped randomly in a city along with hundreds of commoners. After you collect yourself the guards come and take you to a shelter for people randomly appearing like you did and you see a handful of others in adventuring gear like yourself. Unsure of what has brought you here the city is yours to explore how you see fit.
A thought that arises from the idea of tiefling babies often ending up being abandoned: A rich tiefling adventurer retiring and starting up a tiefling orphanage that takes care of rejected tiefling babies and children.
A thought that arises from the idea of a tiefling orphanage: the rich tiefling adventurer regretting his initiative of filling a mansion with dozens of little devils that all can cast Thaumaturgy. At will.
Oh Boy. :’D
Personally I headcanon that tiefling magic starts to manifest around puberty, but if that wasn’t the case, they’d just have to suck it up and tiefling baby-proof the hell out of the place. B) Have no vases and stuff that might fall over and break during tremors. Have sturdy furniture. Lock doors and windows. Avoid having open flames around. Shove cotton or something into your ears.
Oh yeah, and some of the babies might in that case be able to cast friends, minor illusion, ray of frost, or mage hand. Could result in chaos…
My next one shot is definitely going to be “A party of tiefling babies escape from the orphanage (to go to the candy shop)”
sorry to hijack this post but i’ve been drinking coffee and had ideas for how to actually bring this to life so:
BABY TIEF HEIST ONESHOT
PLAYER RULES
You are all tiefling toddlers, each pick a different subrace
All your stats are 10, then apply your racial boosts.
you have 4 hp (5 if you have the con boost) if you reach zero, you are unconscious.
Your only abilities are your racial traits.
You have broken out of the orphanage with no money, and seek a treasure trove of candy from the store.
How you retrieve this candy, without being apprehended, is up to you.
DM RULES
Any environmental or effect that could potentially hurt a toddler will only deal 1 hp of damage.
The candy store functions as a dungeon:
the shopkeep is a final boss (objectively has 5 hp if they go the combat route, however, this would only cause him to fall unconcious— there will be no toddler murder.)
other patrons are to be befriended or avoided.
Any creature that is not considered Charmed by the toddlers, whether by magic or exceptional persuasion checks and baby tief cuteness, will report any thievery they see.
Environmental hazards can include
gumballs on the floor
getting distracted by a cute kitty or dog
the candy is on the top shelf!!! just out of reach!
To reach your goal:
you must steal a pound of candy for each player character. you may also steal excess to aid you in your heist just be careful how much you use.
Candy
Lollipops: if you consume a lollipop you can regain 2 hp. (5 lollipops = pound, you may grab 3 at once)
Gumballs: gumballs can be spilled on the floor, functioning like a bag of ball bearings. (20 gumballs = a pound, using gumballs wastes half a pound, you may grab 5 gumballs at once)
Chocolate: Invokes Sugar Rush. (2 chocolate = a pound, you may grab 1 at once, 1 chocolate = one sugar rush)
Sugar Rush gives you advantage on all strength and dexterity checks for five minutes (since initiative hopefully will not be a factor, if it is invoked in a combat situation, the duration is 1 minute), however after, you must make a DC: 15 con save to avoid falling asleep for a post-sugar nap.
You may design your candy store as you will for maximum chaos
roll a d10 + 1 for the number of potential patrons within.
those are just a few small things i thought of for how to run this oneshot for maximum cuteness, creativity and chaos!
Tiefling Babies, we make our dreams come true. Tiefling Babies, we’ll do the same for you.
I ran this one shot for my friends a little over a year ago and they loved it but I love these new ideas. Might have to run it again and go the extremely cute route this time.
EASY BREWIN’ AND FLAVOR
so there was this post going around about how in 5e flavor is your friend and i 100% agree. i wanted to add onto that theme by pointing out, that basic homebrew is a lot easier than you think! everyone can do it! here are some tips to start dipping your toes into the world of flavoring and homebrewin in 5e
disclaimer: this is not an actual guide for how to make homebrews! designing your own subclass/class/monster/spells/race tends to take more thought, effort, work, and originality. these are just some tips to add more originality to your character with the permission of your dm!
change the appearance. this is what most people think of when they’re flavoring things! the post linked above has good examples, but a well-known example i can think of as well is Caleb Widogast from Critical Role. His spell Cat’s Ire is just bigby’s hand, but renamed and reflavored in terms of appearance. Why can’t your Shield spell literally form a translucent shield of energy, just like your fighter’s shield? Or maybe it can just be orange, flame-like energy, melting an opposing spell attack away. change the way magic items look! change the way spells appear! add a supernatural flair to your fighter by making their second wind literally reknit their flesh. change the way your wood elf looks! who says they can’t have skin like bark and green hair, no one!
change the element. L i T e r A L L Y what drives me crazy about d&d is that there are SO MANY fire spells and not a lot of spells for other elements. It’s so easy! to make an ice based wizard! by changing the flavor and/or damage types of spells! turn Fireball into Snowball. turn Fire Bolt into Icicle! Turn Burning Hands into a Souped Up Poison Spray! Shadowblade? Fuck that noise we’re giving her a Lightblade! (NOTE: In my personal opinion, changing damage types for spells isn’t that unbalanced and wouldn’t ruin gameplay, however, other dms may disagree with this flavor tip in particular)
change the mechanics. if you’ve turned Fireball into Iceball.. maybe instead of just doing a ton of damage, you choose to deal less cold damage but also half your opponents speed for their next turn if they fail their safe, lending to the cold nature. “Hey, why is that spell a Charisma save… that doesn’t make sense to me.” SWITCH IT TO WISDOM! OR INTELLIGENCE!
rename it. after all of these, you should get the idea. it’s okay to rename things if the name doesn’t make sense or if there isn’t a dude in your setting named Nystul.
change spellcasting. this is another one of those that needs a disclaimer because i’m a bastard that takes a wrecking ball to spellcasting. but this is my hot take: you can take spells outside of your spell list if it fits your character, the plot, and the setting. now liza, doesn’t this destroy the point of expanded spell lists? maybe a bit, but i’d rather let my players have spells that MAKE sense for their character instead of being bound to spells that don’t fit their backstory and personality. also! if you think your Sorcerer seems more scholarly and probably did a great deal of research into honing their magic and is genuinely intelligent but you’ve had to pretty much dump intelligence in favor of your spellcasting modifier Charisma and constitution for concentration checks…. why don’t you just, make them an intelligence-based casting sorcerer. i’m going to just let that sink in. there is nothing inherently wrong with changing the spellcasting ability of your character if it fits their personality better. it will not change or break mechanics. all you need to do is change your save to it as well. MAKE that wizard that learned magic but sheer FORCE of WILL and CHUTZPAH. make that wise old bard, reluctantly trying to keep all these youngsters from running straight to their grave, singing songs about their adventures. MAKE that socially awkward paladin who isn’t charismatic, but sure does know a lot about smites! (NOTE: like i said this is another opinion other dms might murder me for but like, i’m putting it out there anyway.)
customize your background. do you ever make a character with a backstory that doesn’t completely mesh with one of the premade backgrounds? PICK AND CHOOSE. pick a feature from the entertainer background that fits your characters! pick the proficiencies of a Criminal if your character was a shady performer! there’s NOTHING stopping you from mixing and matching so long as you don’t exceed the limit of what is given with each background (proficiencies, feature, starter equipment, sometimes languages).
tldr; there’s literally nothing stopping you if you’re not satisfied with how something meshes with your character or your setting. so long as you have a willing dm and work with preexisting functions and examples in dm, you can flavor and shift subclasses, racial traits, spells, etc, so easily to make it a more cohesive fit.
if anyone else wants to add their own opinions feel free! just be respectful of other people :)
Just started following and scrolling through this blog on mobile maybe a day ago and I officially love it. Homebrew content is amazing but this post alone is one that every DM and player should see. While some may not agree with a few things in it, it is the backbone of much of DND. Customization and reworking things so they fit the character/ game you're running.
Whipped up an Infernal alphabet/script! Theres like absolutely jack shit for this language online, so I made my own script for it. It takes inspiration from a lot of ceremonial magick alphabets as well as the daedric alphabet from elder scrolls.
Personally I headcanon infernal basically being fantasy latin, but Infernal needs it’s own alphabet, so here we are.
Aside from DnD uses, this also would work good for grimories and whatnot. In fact, I actually plan to use it for making sigils.
So yeah, heres an infernal alphabet, free to use! Please reblog this so it gains traction.
This is awesome!