Idiot Rights

Suh dude whats poppin? uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh im sam hi

[talking-fox-actual-deactivated2]

I upset a few people in my intro to western philosophy class with this one.

[missouriangothic]

[furbearingbrick]

[freelyunder]

[zukriuchen]

[theemotionmachine]

[cyberbullyinc]

[emiliusthegreat]

I had previously seen the bottom image with zero context like 5 times before finally finding the context post and that’s why I love tumblr.

[gremlinservant]

Just vaccinated three kids and got kicked thank GOD I am selling them today

Edit:

THIS IS A POST ABOUT GOATS!!

[loulooser]

Can’t wait to not sleep at all on September 11th

[spinostarz]

i know ur from the uk(?) but reading this as an american is really really funny

[loulooser]

why 😭 it’s about twenty one pilots???? Their new album is out sep 12th????

[jarsjam]

THERE'S TWENTY ONE THIS TIME???

[willgrahamscock]

[janawijete]

[contact-guy]

sherlock holmes deduces you are trans before you've figured it out yourself and refers to you with those pronouns and then when you look confused is like "ah...had you not arrived at that conclusion yet?" and wafts away in his dressing gown to smoke seventeen pipes, leaving you in a gender crisis

[skipppppy]

Hercule Poirot deduces you are trans by accident because he suspected you of murder and broke into your house and searched your stuff then puts 2 and 2 together when Hastings makes an innocuous observation about your fashion sense or something and he jumps up and cries “mon dieu!!!” before striding over to you kissing you on both cheeks and saying “ah, cher ami, you must live as you choose!” and then running off to confront the real culprit while you stand there in befuddlement

[ospreyonthemoon]

Columbo deduces you're trans from context clues while he's talking to you about the area, immediately uses your preferred pronouns and starts telling you about his cousin, who's also transgender, and how they got this job doing security, and how they told him that a security guard always locks up, and asks you if the guard locked up last night, and isn't it weird the place was open? And you're like, well, someone else must have opened it up. Maybe the guy in charge? He has a spare key. And then he nods and goes "the guy in charge has a spare key... well, how about that?" And then he offers you a cigar and wanders off, and a day later your boss gets arrested for murder.

[deathsmallcaps]

Fanon Batman deduces you are trans and suddenly a free hormone clinic opens up by your home a couple months later

[answeringmysister]

Miss Fisher learns youre trans and simply gives you hormones, and a little cocaine as a treat. she also invites you out to a club to meet like minded individuals. at the club you watch as she seduces the bartender and then the next day the bartender is arrested for the murder.

[viridianchronicle]

[stealingpotatoes]

pretty sure this is exactly how lessons at qifrey's atelier go

(links // tip jar!)

[chefboy-argirl]

Americans will really measure in any form of unit huh?

[mail-me-a-snail]

he's free now

[utilitycaster]

I'm going to *remembers suicide jokes are detrimental to my mental health* quit my job and start making shoes for American Girl Dolls

[haarute]

me: i can't do anything... i don't know what my life is anymore...

the jacob wysocki tulpa manifesting inside my brain:

[gamechangershow]

Welcome to Game Changer season 8

[sesamie]

learning that addiction is a progressive narrowing of the range of things that make one happy was kinda life changing for me. i apply it to everything not even just addiction i am always checking to ask if i am narrowing my range of happiness or widening it

[argumate]

always good to check whether your coping strategy has become something that needs its own coping strategies

[ooppo]

A PORN BOT UNFOLLOWED ME?

[ooppo]

not that i care

[ooppo]

[jamesroach]

4:35 Blaze it sorry traffic was crazy

[jamesroach]

oh we missed the ten year anniversary of the worst post i’ve ever made

[professionalchaoticdumbass]

traffic again?

[worldheritagepostorganization]

World Heritage Post

[gorbling]

Im enjoying the longevity of tumblrs recontextualization style of humor. a seemingly innocuous post followed by like "posts that a gnome would make" or like "are you a phone"

[gorbling]

[hapalopus]

[hapalopus]

More from the notes:

[vexwerewolf]

I love this post

[karifaevt]

The horse thinks as it scratches an itch

[dogpuppy]