#traumatic mutism

[wyrmlord]

I HAVE THOUGHTS ON GHOSTBLADE AND HIS WHOLE FATHER DEAL!

Ghostblade's entire father arc makes me really upset on his behalf (because it was written so well.) An I feel like people are missing some crucial factors here that disabled and neurodivergent people have to deal with all the time.

Ghostblade is not some deadbeat parent figure whose job was more important than family. He didn't leave them, he didn't emotionally cut them off, he had fatherhood taken away from him for things out of his control. More importantly, he was then made to feel like it was "for the child's own well being" because he wasn't good enough. If he really was some deadbeat or work was more important, he wouldn't have tried so hard.

It's established that he grew up with horrific sensory issues that kept him from connecting with people for most of his young life right? So he meets this girl right:

Who's kinda like him and he doesn't feel so alone right. They don't talk physically, but they text. They enjoy one another's company. They both are weirdos but the same flavor of weirdo. They get fucking MARRIED. The baby might have been an accident, but the rest of their lives together wasn't. She knew who he was. An what their life was like.

So then she drops the bombshell right. They're pregnant. An she kinda drops it from a confrontational perspective. So Ghostblade panics cause valid and that's a normal human response. Now he's trying to figure out what they're going to do, he can't TALK to her physically. An she takes this as some kind of sign that he's unfit to parent a child. That he doesn't want the baby, or her and that she's better off leaving.

I bring this up because panic is a valid response no matter what your life looks like. That and both his inability to talk and his panic attack got in the way. My biggest issue is that she knows who he is. Not in the hero way, but as a person. She freaks out on him and acts like this is some example of his inability to function. It's not just a one time response either. This persists and she CONTINUES to keep him away from his daughter even when he shows her otherwise.

People do this to neurodivergents all the fucking time too. People treat anyone with a disability like they are evil for even trying to he a parent. With no regard for circumstances or actual effort being put it. An it doesn't stop at dirty looks, its like straight up actionable things to take away their children. Blind parents, deaf parents, queer parents, (which isn't a disability but another form of being DIFFERENT that people discriminate against) even just autistic parents.

An it wrecks his confidence. A woman who previously made him feel normal and safe, is now using those same traits they SHARED as proof that he's a bad person who can't raise a child. It makes him feel bad and like he really can't be a parent.

But even then, despite his reservations and his fears he still reaches out. His stalking and the way he does it proves that if given the chance he would have been a plenty capable father. He puts himself in environments that tests his sensory issues. Completely and soley for his daughter. He reaches out in the ways he can to learn what she loves and to absorb her life even though he can't interact with her.

But he's still pushed away despite visible and clear proof of his efforts. I understand why he is the way he is. But I'm still so fucked up at the idea of how much he lost for ableist bullshit. Literally just imagine how good a father he could have been.

[thousandyearphantombunker]

if your someone who says that prince Eric only fell in love with Ariel because she was mute and therefore meek/unable to fight back then your an ableist idiot or you didn't watch the movie

Cause where was she meek? Where was she unable to fight back? Why is it wrong that Eric fell in love with a girl who can't talk? Please explain

[theinvisiblewoman73]

https://archiveofourown.org/works/59184913/chapters/150916465

My completed work Honey is on AO3. I did start to publish her but I’m old and I forgot but here it is 😂

Summary: After a few months in Jackson, Ellie has settled in. Joel, however, still feels on edge. But a new arrival in town, and Ellie’s instant connection to them, will force Joel to confront parts of himself he’d rather not think about.

You have lost everything when you arrive in Jackson. Will the town, and the community you find there, be enough to give you a reason to carry on, to stay?

Chapter One - Prologue

“we are continually overflowing toward those who preceded us, toward our origin, and toward those who seemingly come after us. ... It is our task to imprint this temporary, perishable earth into ourselves so deeply, so painfully and passionately, that its essence can rise again “invisibly,” inside us. We are the bees of the invisible. We wildly collect the honey of the visible, to store it in the great golden hive of the invisible.” Rainer Maria Rilke

———

“Would you get a move on!”

You could hear her saying it but your attention was caught by the sun glinting through the leaves of the tree outside your house. The oak that your great grandfather had planted there, according to family legend. Now it was a beautiful old fellow, always there when you stepped onto the porch, casting its shadow onto the front lawn.

Erin lent on the horn, snapping you out of your daydream. “Magpie!” she shouted, leaning down across the passenger seat to peer at you. “Come on! I’m gonna be late for work. Again.” Running down the steps and down the path to the car, you got into the passenger seat, worried that she was irritated, but she just started up the car and smiled at you.

“Maggie Magpie,” she laughed, as she checked the side mirror and pulled away from the kerb. “Always looking at something.” Erin had been calling you that for almost as long as you could remember. She hadn’t used your real name for years, firstly calling you Magpie and then settling into Maggie. People you met now thought that was your actual name and sometimes you didn’t correct them. You liked it and because she had given it to you, it was special.

The car pulled out into the street that morning, the houses still quiet, the sun still low in the sky. That morning. September 26th 2003.

———

Late 2023

“You have to keep quiet,” you whispered, trying to make her see that speaking out would only lead to trouble. But Erin was angry.

“That’s easy for you to say,” she snapped back at you, but seeing the hurt on your face, she sighed. “Christ I’m sorry, Magpie,” she said. She hadn’t used that version of your nickname for a long time, and it made you think of her as a teenager, as a young woman. It hurt. Hurt to think of her this way, of everything that the two of you had gone through.

You looked at her, thin, older than she had any right to look. If things had been fair on the two of you, you would have had careers by now. Families. You should have been living next door to each other and car sharing on the school run. Not here. Not this.

“I’m sorry,” she said again, and put her hand on your arm. “I just can’t stay here any more. Can’t live with these people any more.” And she was right, but the idea of leaving made you feel terrified too. What would they say? How would they take your departure?

Erin was standing by the open window of the room you shared, the autumn wind lifting her hair slightly. Suddenly you both heard footsteps and the sound of someone running away. Erin spun round and looked outside.

“That fucking brat,” she grimaced angrily, and you leant to look out seeing a child running away towards the meeting house. “Shit, he was listening. We have to go, Maggie,” she told you, “The sooner the better.” She slammed the window closed as if it could hold in the secret that you had been discussing. But it was too late. Her voice had been heard.

———

It was freezing the day you finally walked away, smoke on the horizon behind you, silence after the storm. You had gone to get your coat, your bag, your few belongings. Stood in the crowd with everyone else, but finally had turned your back on them, left that nightmare behind you. You had no food. You would find that on the way. Or you wouldn’t. Because what did it matter now?

You skirted the village, keeping to the bare tree line, and focused on putting one foot in front of another. The snow was new, only a couple of days old, as you walked the line between what was behind you, still burning, and what lay out there. And there in the snow were footprints, leading out into the forest. Someone had already made a path there, and you let the footprints decide your way. You had no idea of where you were going, but this seemed as good a start as any. Or as good an ending.

You followed the steps into the silence.

———

Read on at

https://archiveofourown.org/works/59184913/chapters/150916465

[amity-candylust]

Guys I have a question

How would someone know if they have selective mutism and not just random verbal shutdowns, because im having a hard time trying to figure out if we’re actually selectively mute

We have alters who don’t talk at all when they front, and alters that only experience random verbal shutdowns, then theres alters who have specific triggers that cause them to be unable to talk

What are some causes of selective mutism

[pragnn]

I had a nightmare today. It was the passive kind, Not the one where you jerk up all sudden and sweating. This was slow and muting, silent Just like all the rest. In my sleep, you were showing me 'love' And even after five years, I relearn everyday that my body and mind did not forget. I went mute for quite a while after waking up I went mute in the dream when you moved away on hearing footsteps. I did not wake up then I did not wake up when you followed me in and locked the door of the room I had wanted to get away from you in. I sat down on the ground, put my knees to my chest so that your hands had something in the way, to hesitate first. I did not tell you to get out. I did not tell you "no". I was shaking. Open haired and red eyed- all your deeds, proud of it as you were. I did not say anything, but I knew from your eyes you could hear me pleading and crying: "Please please please don't touch me. Please don't do this to me. I am your little sister. What do I do to get your hands to stop-" And you smiled your knife-sharp smile And cut me open- again- and again- and again- Until my brain lost count and blacked like the curtain falling in a theatre. Later, after waking up, I went to the bathroom, and I fucked myself over my own teary eyes and muted screams. This is what you did to me. This is what you have done. And then when I was finally empty, still and silent in the bathroom floor, My body crumbled. Will I ever be worthy of someone whose hands stay, stay, stay— I imagined a future where a man said "We can stop if you want." After I had gone still as a corpse— Something that never stopped you. And I apologised so many times, like I never forgot to speak in a dream once. I was crying, and he tentatively held his palm out for me to hold on to The action a mirror of what I do when I comfort my little brother. I hold out my palm near him and he takes my hand if he likes. I teach him boundaries to his body that no one should cross. In the back of my head, you love me over and over and over again, So I double down and ensure he never experiences that "love". And when the man in my head, holds out his palm— I hold it like the anchor to a ship at storm. I tell him 'thank you', while bawling my eyes out My throat feels reborn, pained but alive— Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

1st March '24 4:24 pm

[selectivechaos]

traumatic vs. selective mutism

selective mutism (sm) is technically not caused by trauma - there is no evidence that people with sm are any more likely to have trauma than people without sm.

still trauma can be a factor in the development of sm, but it’s a myth that selective mutes are necessarily traumatised.

sm, when trauma is a factor in its development, tends to develop slowly and gradually after the trauma, whereas traumatic mutism can sometimes be sudden and in all situations right after a trauma.

that being said, this depends on the nature of the trauma; trauma that is repeated or across several years can mean mutism as a response is gradual. this might be traumatic or selective.

i think one key difference would be that traumatic mutism is often (complete or partial mutism) in almost all situations; whereas with sm there tends to be one significant situation (person, setting etc) in which the individual is completely fine with speaking.

im not an expert nor am i well versed in traumatic mutism, but they are different things that are often confused

[outspoken-mute]

Hi. I has a character in my novel that didn't speak because of traumatic event in his life until one moment. Can person with a selective mutism gradually speak more often if he finds that he can trust people around him and feels safe?

yes! you can recover from selective mutism, often with therapy and support from others. if your character does not speak at all after trauma, that would be psychogenic mutism, and usually goes away with time if the traumatic event happens in adulthood. so, yes, your character would likely recover from mutism and it's totally possible for that to happen around friends :)

[ineedashrinkinator]

i self isolate bcs they never understand me let alone do they know how to comfort me. not that i have a speakable mouth btw