Branden Stewart

Stage Manager by day, Youtuber by night. Blogger in spare time.

[moveslikekeithrichards]

the role of the person in the passenger seat is not only navigator but secretary as well. you have to type up the drivers messages to random ladies on facebook about cbd cream & google whether that billy joel song was the theme song for that show or not

[moveslikekeithrichards]

you also have to provide a henchmans disdainful scowl at whoever the driver is flipping off in the target parking lot

[the-apocrypha]

other assorted roles may include

retrieval team for objects in the backseat

custodian of the parking garage tickets

"All clear my way"

en-route dining concierge

announcing "Horses!" when there are horses

[lynx-girl]

Don't forget the Tommy Gun

[help-my-ocs-breached-containmen]

You should never forget the Tommy Gun

[strongermonster]

the joke writes itself huh

[shitpostinguniverse]

[angstbotfic]

yes and

and 

[sic-semper-hominibus]

[rebel13lion39]

[pinkpy]

remember being a kid just blissed out and utterly hypnotized by the home depot fountain displays

[cock-warlock]

[albertserra]

Playing Witcher 3 and avoiding having sex with women

[thatguythatlikesmgsandfungus]

This isn't that difficult I'd say the majority of people that played Witcher 3 avoided it completely

[thatguythatlikesmgsandfungus]

Oh you mean in game

[qwertyu858]

[adonischildsupportcase]

[specialty38-deactivated20200930]

those is mcdonalds jeans?

[ynfynytscrolltbh]

Fun fact: those McDonald’s jeans are part of the standard uniform here in Colombia. I’ve tried at least 16x to ask where they source them, if I can buy them from the manager, even going McDonald’s not to order food but just to ask for the jeans. I asked someone high up in their marketing dept here to see if maybe they know which company sourced them, and still couldn’t get my hands on a pair. Apparently employees only get one pair per year. They’re slightly high-waisted, they taper very slightly, they’re always kind of high water at the bottom, and they’re the perfect light jean color. They’re not stiff, they’re not that stretchy, they’re the perfect denim material. They come with a cloth belt that’s either yellow or turquoise, and the stitching on the M is almost sensual. I will not give up

[lolt64]

theres a hourse in the dirve through

[tooies]

could you please stay on topic

[sinmenon]

Jeans are also part of the standard uniform in Brazil. They actually recently changed the uniform for the first time in 18 years and you might find some of the jeans in second-hand stores or sites

Apparently the jeans was made by the stylist Alexandre Herchcovitch so maybe it can help you in your search, @ynfynytscrolltbh​

[theterribletenno]

Oh my god that's fucking hilarious

[ziraseal]

The arrow:

[iampikachuhearmeroar]

this is the most horrifying ad i’ve had on my dash in a while

[tittyinfinity]

What if I swab my pussy with this at home covid test to see how absolutely sick it is

[stshipper]

[whitepeopletwitter]

True freedom.

[funnelcloudd]

Very true but why does this jpeg look like the fever dream of a dying man

[curioscurio]

[cumaeansibyl]

my parents trying to get ahold of me in 1998

[mysteriousartcentury]

Emil Lauffer (1837-1909), Kriemhild’s Accusation (Kriemhild accuses Gunther and Hager of murdering her husband Siegfried), 1879, oil on canvas, 191 x 300 cm. National Gallery Prague

[thebrandenscott]

He’s sus for sure

[thebrandenscott]

Sometimes when I’m sad I look thru my tumblr likes of ages past

[kimoramay-deactivated20170907]

I was told recently about a school that was shamed into changing its school motto. The motto was “I hear, I see, I learn.” Nothing wrong with that per se. Unfortunately the motto was in Latin, and the Latin for “I hear, I see, I learn” is “audio, video, disco”.

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

What the fuck that’s the best school motto ever change it back

[copperbadge]

Your yearly reminder that “I learn through suffering” can be translated into Latin as “Disco Inferno.” 

[saint-batrick]

learn, baby, learn!

[kedreeva]

you take that BACK

[rob-boss]

[cadaverkeys]

trying not to think too hard about how gen z/gen alpha casually use leet speak but when millennials used it it was because it was cool and internet age slang, and when gen z and alpha use it its because they need to get past censorship restrictions that would cause their videos on LBGT and civil rights to be algorithmically hidden.

[cadaverkeys]

or about how people use terms like "real life game over" and "unalive" to avoid saying death out loud because video streaming services apparently suppress videos with negative language. we are literally living in an era that was theorised by many states of fiction about a high surveillance cyberpunk reality...

[marlinspirkhall]

[Image ID: the meme which reads "You best start believing in cyberpunk dystopias, you're in one". End Image ID]

[bylinehearts]

olaf is the prime example of a genuinely bad character who did a few good deeds in his life and doesnt get redeemed because of it. the baudelaires did not mourn for him. they buried him because to them, they felt thats what they should do. they still hated him. count olafs ending is not an excuse to crown him your “uwu precious angel who was misunderstood.” he is a bad person who had a few good moments. dont romanticize his abuse of the baudelaires just because he carried kit to the island.

[huffleporg]

I think they buried him because watching a corpse decompose is traumatizing and unhygienic. Plus it would not smell good at all. 

Burying him was more their gift to themselves than any commentary on his worth as a character. 

[liquidstar]

damn wtf happened in frozen 2

[titkoks]

i don’t know why i love this so much but i do

[headspace-hotel]

they are going to do a crime to me possibly two of them

[thebrandenscott]

I want to be their friend