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Aqua Utopia｜海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
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@tunathena
A shrewsie, my answer to @bowelfly's call for more shrewnanigans.
slow shrews day is going to become part of my lexicon from now on
(for context, i made a joke post on bluesky that inspired a deluge of extremely fun shrew art in the replies & reblogs)
Javert is my favorite character because if I was a young yet-unaware gay Frenchman and like my first job ever was at the Sweaty Half-Naked Man Factory Where They’re All Twice Your Size And Have To Do Everything You Say, and on my first day there I saw the strongest guy alive like, hefting ship masts or whatever, kept him under my thumb every day for years, and then had screaming match with him shortly before he disappeared out of my grasp forever, I would also be doing all that shit
jekyll AND hyde
jekyll OR hyde
jekyll NOR hyde
jekyll XOR hyde
month starting on a monday we have no excuse guys lets get to work and lock the fuck in
yk its actually very chic and avant garde to start on tuesday the second
many claim theres nothing more subversive and revolutionary than starting on wednesday the third
boobs should have a toggle on/off feature
have you guys heard about the greenland shark. some crazy shit happening there.
they are sexually mature at ONE HUNDRED AND FIFTY YEARS OLD.
their (live!) young gestate for. wait for it. eight to eighteen (??) YEARS. can have up to 10 at a time. good grief.
longest lifespan of any vertebrate, up to five hundred years
toxic flesh
has giant eyes but is usually blind because of a weird little crustacean that's evolved to live on and eat their eyes. this doesn't seem to bother them much.
lives in deep cold water and has the lowest swim speed and tail-beat frequency for its size across all fish species. just generally lives life in extreme slow motion
largest genome of any shark
eats everything including moose and polar bears
ma'am you are delightfully strange and I'm privileged to share a planet with you
this post prompted me to refresh my memory on Greenland Shark Facts and this detail about how they feed goes so hard
just vacuuming up their unsuspecting prey. whole !
Good news good news good news! Recent research suggests the eye parasites do NOT blind them!
Dorota Skowronska-Krawczyk sits in her office, eyes fixed on the computer monitor in front of her. "You see it move its eye," says the UC Ir
I <3 you a normal amount Greenland sharks
Our lady 🙂↕️
real exchange i overheard between two of my bosses. ????
why is this getting notes again everyone STOP talking about white collar & rich guy shit i am a BLUE COLLAR DYKE!!!! THIS IS A JANITORIAL COMPANY!!!! i will NOT let you make this about white collar businessmen the poors are funny too ok
Writing tips:
“You feel the bulge in his pants” - implies that you are feeling some guy’s penis, may be sexy depending on context
“You feel the bugle in his pants” - implies that this guy has a military horn in his pants, invites confusing questions like why does he have that and how big are his pockets
Both options convey that he's horny
How dare you be funnier than me on my own post
There’s an emotion only unlocked when you live in a house with multiple stories. I call it “the stair emotion” and it’s when you realize the object you need is on the other side of yet another trip up and down those goddamn stairs. It’s the closest I get to transcending the desire for material goods. Maybe I don’t need that notebook. Maybe I don’t need anything.
girl you are so strange and offputting
REGRET TO INFORM YOU YOUR SON HAS DIED FROM TRENCH FOOT LOL HE SERVED WITH COURAGE AND HONOR LOL PLEASE ACCEPT OUR DEEPEST CONDOLENCES LOL
stop thinking with your dick and start thinking with your pussy. ok now stop thinking with your pussy and start thinking with your dick again. meditate on the differences between them. call me back when you get it.
[You should look a gift ungulate in the mouth: Using 2D occlusal cheek tooth morphology to study the evolution of molarization in ungulates]
Ashbaugh et al. (2026)
you learn something new everyday. unless you're a historian. then you learn something old
leornast þu aht niwe æghwylcum dæge. butan sie þu stærleornere. ðonne leornast þu aht eald
im awfully pretentious for someone who knows nothing and does nothing. solution is to become someone who knows everything and does everything. because i am not getting off this high horse. im velcroed to the saddle. im fused to the horse.
