Beams @un-be-spoke - Tumblr Blog

how life feels when you want video essays that aren’t just plot/wikipedia summaries and are made by people who have read at least one book in the last decade

wizard0rb

this was just an excuse to post

tumblr user wizard0rb's video essay choice awards:

(note: i'm using the term "video essay" to broadly refer to long form videos on youtube. not all of these are essays)

The Other Half of the West (A Travelogue) - Noah Caldwell-Gervais

This one goes at the top of the list in the hopes that you read it first, it sticks in your mind the most, and you watch it in full. Genuine contender for greatest piece of long form content on Youtube. Noah makes videos about games as well, but this is his best work imo.

Metal Gear Solid 4 was a Mistake - Steak Bentley

The definitive take on an absolutely insane piece of fiction. Funny enough that you can enjoy it even if you don't know anything about MGS. Steak Bentley is genuinely one of the best to ever do it.

THE PISS SAGA | Short Documentary - Derek Milton

A brief investigative documentary concerning the bottles of human piss that keep mysteriously appearing on an electrical box in California.

who firebombed friendlyjordies? - friendlyjordies

0% clickbait- someone firebombed Australian Youtuber friendlyjordies' house, and this is the video he made trying to figure out who did it.

The Tyler Perry Video - F.D Signifier

I was struggling to pick a single FD video for this list (because they're all so good), so I went with his most recent one. Go watch this video and then go watch all his other videos.

a normal creepypasta retrospective - hazel

An exceptionally good retrospective on some interesting creepypastas like The Peeker, Gabbit Rabbits, ShareThis, etc.

The Unreality of Pro Wrestling: FINISH THE STORY - Super Eyepatch Wolf

I wasn't originally going to put an Eyepatch Wolf video on here, for the same reason there's no hbomberguy or Defunctland- I feel like most people are already familiar with his stuff. But this video made me go from not giving a fuck about pro wrestling at all, to being deeply invested in a fight between 2 dudes I had previously never heard of, so it makes the list.

NEED FOR SPEED - A Brief History - Noodle

I want you to close your eyes and enter the Theatre of the Mind with me. Imagine, if you will, a reality in which Sequelitis was extremely good, and also made by someone else. Now open your eyes. You were so powerful that you brought that vision back with you into the material world.

The search for the saddest punt in the world | Chart Party - Secret Base

Jon Bois of 17776 fame once again making compelling football media that is accessible to the layman.

Art in the Pre-Apocalypse - Jacob Geller

My favorite video from a channel that pretty much never makes bad videos, Jacob Geller talks about living at the cusp of the end of the world. And also Final Fantasy

BONUS SINCE I'M HERE: OTHER NOTABLE YOUTUBE VIDEOS I ENJOY

these are just some youtube videos i like. no description because i think you should experience them without pretense

Badass swords AND grim reapers.

how to make pickle pepsi at home for free

Homemade dinosaur documentary

When the lights go out at night #shorts #viral

Drinking Orange Crush

Hermeto Pascoal - Música da Lagoa (Sinfonia do Alto Ribeira, 1985)

Center Core Never More

Lil’ Slimer - Online Video

My Movie

Japanese toilet experience 1

When you play games in your dreams, you don't use a controller, do you?

Cocaine & Crack

Give it All You've Got

may you never have a youtubeless dinner

headspace-hotel

video essays are unfriendly with my brain but jacob geller's videos are pretty much all fantastic

spaceshipsandpurpledrank

She right

spaceshipsandpurpledrank

@free-range-tiddies

dogpuppy

At the local hamburger shop and they said yelled out “order 167!” And three middle school age kids yelled in perfect unison “ 6 7!” Life is sometimes so beautiful

moisterpeggingchampion

If you reference 67 you deserve to be executed on the spot tbh

dogpuppy

If I was king for a day the first thing I would do would be to sentence you to a life full of love and understanding.

internet-sentences

Please hit me up if you know where I can find more of these surreal ~2014 (?) 4chan memes of female NEETs that I find incredibly compelling

trashfirefallon-deactivated2019

You fools. You can’t see the forest through the trees. This is literally revelations, complete with the mother harlot, the four horsemen, the behemoth with seven heads, and various other imagery.

trashfirefallon-deactivated2019

In care you think I’m joking. Revelations 17:18 is when the whore of Babylon is mentioned.

this is a quote from Anne mccarfferey (wrote dragon riders of pern)

Revelations 7:13

A great multitude stand before the Throne of God, who come out of the Great Tribulation, clothed with robes made “white in the blood of the Lamb” and having palm branches in their hands. (7:9–17)

Seventh Trumpet: The Third Woe that leads into the seven bowls (11:15–19) The temple of God opens in heaven, where the ark of His covenant can be seen. There are lightnings, noises, thunderings, an earthquake, and great hail.

This is a quote from “ The Year of Living Biblically: One Man’s Humble Quest to follow the Bible as Literally as Possible “

In the book, Jacobs discusses biblical rules, both the obscure and the well-known, and tries to follow them as literally as possible. He even attempts to stone an adulterer and to offer animal sacrifice. He also goes to visit numerous religious groups in order to show their particular views on the Bible, as well as their methods of worship.

Do I even need to explain the four horses?

The Four Angels, bound to the river Euphrates

THE SEVENTH TRUMPET: (il) THE SIGN OF THE WOMAN .2 Then a huge sign became visible in the sky the figure of * a Woman clothed with the sun, with the moon under her feet and a crown of twelve stars upon her head

I dont feel like looking for more, but here you go.

ache-of-saint-vick

This is the most cursed post I’ve ever seen

afloweroutofstone

You are fucking kidding me

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

today I found out my mother doesn’t know what dandelions are and now I’m wondering what other strange secrets she’s been quietly harboring

krystal-prisms

Where do you live that you don’t have dandelions?

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

we have dandelions EVERYWHERE, they are basically our State Weed, it is absolutely impossible that my mom has never interacted with a dandelion before, this requires further investigation

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

So after extensive interrogation I have an update:

my mom is in fact aware that dandelions exist. she temporarily forgot the name and there was some miscommunication.

the truth is actually weirder

she’s aware dandelions look like this

she is familiar with this flower. she knows the name of this flower. she declines to believe, however, that these are also dandelions

she does not believe these are the same plant. I tried to explain, and she thought I was either misinformed or lying. so I asked her what exactly did she think the yellow ones were called?

she answered, with complete confidence: Daffodils.

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

gosh I enjoy this website

authoratmidnight

For comparison, this is a daffodil

quietlygrousing

See, folks in the southern US will tell you up and down those are buttercups, actually.

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

i don’t think so? i’m southern and buttercups are what we call these things (much tinier)

maejacrezz007

Wait I thought those bigger cup ones were Easter Lillies???

$fractiousrvt blog's avatar$

fractiousrvt

This is an Easter Lily. It is an actual lily and therefore deadly to cats.

blood-trip-god2

They’re marigolds and I know a bitch when I see one!

delphinidin4

This is a marigold:

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

….we need to start taking the phrase “go touch grass” more literally. go outside and examine a flower i beg u

jmtorres

“buttercups” is a name applied to MANY flowers. in my part of the south it was this one:

imo there’s correct identifications of dandelions, daffodils, easter lilies and marigolds in this thread, but buttercups are simply impossible to agree on and the only solution is for everyone to post pictures of their local buttercups

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

*squints* is that a motherfucking EVENING PRIMROSE?!??

demon-and-human

Hello I would like to add to the confusion:

That purple fella is a Morning Glory as told by my mothers (texan)

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

⬆️ morning glory

biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist

#amazing work everyone hit the flowers

un-be-spoke

Fuck you, marigolds!

edgebug

happy 20 year anniversary of Neil banging out the tunes!

though every rat is special, it's a wonderful and unusual thing for their accomplishments to be remembered and cherished by so many people so many years later. we're all so fortunate to know about the rat who banged out the tunes!

thank you to all the people who sent me reference photos of their beloved rats for this piece!!! credits under the cut!

brightwanderer

I think a lot about how we as a culture have turned “forever” into the only acceptable definition of success.

Like… if you open a coffee shop and run it for a while and it makes you happy but then stuff gets too expensive and stressful and you want to do something else so you close it, it’s a “failed” business. If you write a book or two, then decide that you don’t actually want to keep doing that, you’re a “failed” writer. If you marry someone, and that marriage is good for a while, and then stops working and you get divorced, it’s a “failed” marriage.

The only acceptable “win condition” is “you keep doing that thing forever”. A friendship that lasts for a few years but then its time is done and you move on is considered less valuable or not a “real” friendship. A hobby that you do for a while and then are done with is a “phase” - or, alternatively, a “pity” that you don’t do that thing any more. A fandom is “dying” because people have had a lot of fun with it but are now moving on to other things.

I just think that something can be good, and also end, and that thing was still good. And it’s okay to be sad that it ended, too. But the idea that anything that ends is automatically less than this hypothetical eternal state of success… I don’t think that’s doing us any good at all.

wizardarchetypes

there was a poll yesterday asking who is sexier, palpatine or smeagol and i was like "well talk about a rock and a hard place, but it's true that the answer is obvious" but when i cast my vote i saw PALPATINE was winning??????????????!!!!!!! palpatine is an evil dictator. smeagol has depth that palpatine never could. and with smeagol's nakedness at least we know what you see is what you get. palpatine??? over smeagol????? you people are so fucked in the head!!!!

un-be-spoke

Smeagol is your first highschool boyfriend who talks shit about your friends, steals your stuff, and only showers when his sweater gets too crusty. You later find out he's been sneakily taking pictures of your best friend, but gasslights you into believing they wanted to take a video to catch them talking shit behind your back. You leave highschool a broken mess with no friends.

Palpatine is your your boss' boss who, despite being so powerful, remains respectful and supportive. He likes you, woos you even, shares secrets, and trusts you. It's only after you burn all your bridges to follow him in his endeavour to split off from your former employer that you realize that there is no HR in his new company, the workculture is extremely toxic, and he keeps ordering you to kill OSHA inspectors so he doesn't have to install guardrails. You still end up a broken mess with no friends, but, you know, at least you're vice-president!

beguilingcorpse

vergess

A fun bonus fact for you: those No Longer Buyable DVDs?

They're the ONLY surviving NONDAMAGED form of the show. In the late 90s, the masters from which the show is printed were damaged with a red-pink hazy filter.

So. Good luck buying them even if you find them. They're some of the most valuable collector's items in the entire franchise.

Without piracy, there would be NO UNDAMAGED COPIES OF SAILOR MOON AVAILABLE TO ANYONE ANYWHERE, PERIOD.

ETA: Because these undamaged copies are how you colour correct the uncensored ones.

Piracy Is Preservation.

weevilsdaily

grasshoppers piss me off because what

weevilsdaily

Houston zoo spent actual money making this fucker a neck brace

NOT amused

un-be-spoke

This is an original George Lucas Star Wars alien named Slike Poopsmoo or something

robertreich

New York City Mayor Zohran Mamdani succeeded last night in his attempt to build a democratic socialist power base in the Big Apple. His endorsed congressional candidates — Brad Lander, the former city comptroller, and two democratic socialists, Darializa Avila Chevalier and Claire Valdez — all won their races Mamdani said the results showed that his victory in the mayor’s race last year marked a turning point in progressive politics. “It was not the end of a political movement, it was the beginning.” But I think it’s more than that. Democrats across the nation now face the biggest opportunity they’ve had since World War II to change the face of American politics. It’s time for Democrats to take on the class war that’s being waged by the nation’s oligarchy against most Americans by becoming class warriors themselves. By class warrior I don’t mean resorting to violence or name-calling. I mean recognizing that a billionaire class is bad for America and calling for bold changes to reverse it: taxing great wealth, busting up monopolies, strengthening labor unions, raising the minimum wage, demanding profit-sharing and capital-sharing, ensuring Medicare for all and a universal basic income, and getting big money out of politics. Congratulations to these candidates for taking on our rigged system.

micahdotgov

slimy to the moon

strictlyquadrilateral

i'm a notorious flake, is the thing. partly because of my health, partly because of my bad memory, partly because for a long time i didn't have a calendar. the calendar thing is actually kind of related because the reason i didn't have a calendar is because calendars kept being pushed on me as a miracle cure for my undiagnosed adhd in middle school, and they did not help because in order for a calendar to help, you have to use the calendar. i did not remember to use the calendar, so it only made me feel worse and created a broad aversion to all calendars that lasted for quite a long time. but i do like to successfully have social events and not pay no-show fees for medical appointments, and i have always been a horrible flake. the only solution is to identify possible barriers to fulfilling commitments and let people know about them as soon as i become aware of them. i've become quite good at cancelling things multiple days in advance. but you have to become neurotic about this, for it to work. you have to always be going "what are my commitments in the next few days, the next couple weeks, the next month? is there anything that might prevent me from making those?" and then once you're doing that, you become increasingly stressed about the idea that you've forgotten some upcoming event. you can write them down but if you only have a plaintext list it's actually pretty easy to doublebook yourself by accident and not notice for a long time. the only known solution from there is to start a calendar and become neurotic about putting things in the calendar the moment they're scheduled and then checking the calendar multiple times a day every single day. so now i'm a flake but no one has to actually know this. because i'm focused on correcting for it to the point of slight insanity but also, and more socially legibly, because i have a calendar.

ethernalium

Mog by Yoshitaka Amano

preserving-tiktok

hugintheraven

I say this every time, but people Do Not Realize just how short the timeline has been on gay people in kids’ media. And it’s an ongoing fight, but this was 10 - 15 years ago.

casuallyodd

I'm not in the Steven Universe fandom. I don't really even know the show. But the story she's telling here is important to remember. What feels like small snippets of representation took a lot of fighting to get and it wasn't as long ago as you think.

un-be-spoke

I never saw the kind of representation I did, until Steven Universe. When people started throwing it under the bus, I felt so dissapointed

cryptotheism

Humbert Humbert is hilariously conceited and bad at lying. This is an essential component of Lolita. He constantly lies about how attractive and sophisticated and darkly genius he is. For this reason, I firmly believe the only actor who could truly capture his essence is Tim Heidecker.

#Many of your posts are big brain in a way I don't comprehend #but this just cursed me with Insight with a capital I

bovid-beauty

The rule could have heavy impacts towards trans people across society.

Last week, the Trump administration quietly released a sweeping new federal rule that would use funding threats to force institutions across the country to reject transgender people. The 400-page proposed regulation would codify the administration's anti-trans executive orders into binding federal policy, imposing a blanket prohibition on federal funds going toward "gender ideology"

The proposed rule, formally titled "Regulation for Federal Financial Assistance," rewrites the government-wide framework governing all federal grants across every agency. Among its most consequential provisions, it requires that before a federal grant recipient can receive money, the award must pass a "pre-issuance review" conducted by a political appointee—not a career expert or peer reviewer—to ensure it is "consistent with applicable law, Federal agency priorities, and the national interest." The regulation explicitly instructs these appointees to screen for "denial by the recipient of the sex binary in humans or the notion that sex is a chosen or mutable characteristic." [...] An institution that acknowledges transgender people exist—through its policies, its training, its healthcare, its bathroom access, its HR procedures, its name-change processes—could be deemed to "deny the sex binary" or to “support the notion that sex is mutable” and have its federal funding blocked.

Importantly, the gender ideology prohibition has no age limitation—hospitals could be targeted not just for providing care to minors but for providing gender-affirming care to adults, because prescribing hormone therapy to a transgender patient of any age could be deemed promoting the belief that "sex is a chosen or mutable characteristic."

junequeer

THIS IS OPEN TO COMMENT UNTIL JULY 13, 2026

featherandstorm

This is all very bad and horrible, but I want to be clear that it’s worse and more sweeping than just eliminating trans research.

This torches everything. And I do mean everything.

A very abbreviated list of its ramifications include (but are not limited to):

ending funding for ALL DEI related initiatives

allowing the government to terminate grants at any point for any reason

preventing researchers from publishing, going to conferences, and being part of academic societies

requiring that topics must support the president’s agenda.

What this means, and if anything I’m under selling it, is the death of science and research in America. It allows the government to restrict any topic they please at a whims notice, putting officials who have no background in the topic in charge of deciding funding continuity. It controls what gets researched and if/how researchers are allowed to share their discoveries. There are no books to burn if the government never allows them to be written. This is fascism plain and simple.

Please, if you only ever write one public comment, this is the one to do.

genderkoolaid

Bringing back this guide to writing an effective public comment. This gives you the basics you need to know, what you need to include, a basic outline you can follow, etc.

Public comments are not a vote, it is a chance for you to say "here is an issue with this law I think you need to address" and provide justification for legal challenges if it goes forward:

"Comments raise the bar that agencies have to meet when making a rule; “if an agency fails to adequately respond to significant, relevant comments in a final rule, members of the public may seek to challenge the rule in court on that basis and claim it could be struck down.ˮ"

But also, if possible, don't stop at writing a comment. Don't stop at calling your representatives. You should ideally be talking to people in your community about this and organizing resistance on-the-ground; there is a good chance people are already doing that even if you aren't hearing about it.

mageofquandrix

Like they said- get the noise up. The administration has tried lots of ways to ban being transgender, and they've always failed. Make sure to tell community members and ask them to pass the word as well.

Don't let fear or feeling doomed stop you. If you're overwhelmed that's okay, but take a break, take a breath, talk to someone about how you're feeling, and continue.

We've beaten them before and we'll beat them again.

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