Cat Lord

Still a cat lord. Still a dweeb. Just married now. He/They 27

[transhuman-priestess]

You guys do know you're supposed to reblog things, right

[transhuman-priestess]

"well i like this post but i'm worried my followers might not" fuck your followers. The entire point of tumblr is to cause irreparable psychic damage to your followers. We are locked in mortal combat on the astral plane. You must win. You Must Win. You Must Destroy Them.

[moniquill]

"well i like this post but i'm worried my followers might not"

then those aren't the right followers for you.

This is going to sound like pithy nonsense, but this is important to consider: Tumblr is not a content creation mill. It's a playground. You're supposed to interact with other posts, reblog them, respond to them, add to The Bit or offer a rebuttal or a 'yes, and' to text posts.

Who are you curating your space for and why?

[cyber-corp]

this website’s easy watch. *dangles a bunch of greek gods like keys*

[cyber-corp]

i know what i’m doing dw

[cyber-corp]

Keep in mind I only know like. Two Greek gods by name. Homer is one of them, and he was good friends with Odysseus I think?

[cyber-corp]

Wait fuck Homer isn’t a god he wrote the fucking thing. Fuck

[cyber-corp]

POST CANCELLED NO ONE LOOK

[cyber-corp]

desperately google searching for “greek gods to pray to when people notice your online idiocy”

[pluto-officially]

You're failing.

[cyber-corp]

You don’t think I know that, God of Death? Can I pray to you so I can DIE ALREADY

[communist-mannyfesto]

Pluto is Roman, not Greek

[cyber-corp]

?????

[enigma-system03]

Short version is that Pluto is a later name for the god of death, which is often associated with the Roman era/Roman mythology. Hades is the earlier name.

[cyber-corp]

I set up my own house made of sticks and it has promptly fallen on me

[cyber-corp]

HE’S NOT EVEN REAL?????*

[cyber-corp]

I made this post thinking I knew what kind of fire I was playing with. Hephaestus, God of Fire, looking upon me from his fuck off tower or whatever said “Oh you think you know? Check this shit” and promptly set my post ablaze for everyone to observe

[legionoftuna]

Hephaestus doesn't have a tower, he lived in a volcano

[cyber-corp]

FINE THEN. BIG FUCK OFF VOLCANO. WHATEVER

[cyber-corp]

wrong.

[pointless-achievements]

Achievement Unlocked:

Lightning Bait

You're basically doing the post equivalent of standing out in a field during a storm with a ten-foot copper pole, you better hope Zeus is busy hiding from Hera.

[cyber-corp]

FUCK'S SAKE NOT AGAIN

[taco-bee]

I need you to name every greek God you know and what they are for plz

For science

[cyber-corp]

OKAY FINE HERE'S WHAT I'VE FOUND

HERMES: DA FUNNY ONE

ZEUS: DA LIGHTNING (NOTE: THOUGHT HE WAS NORDIC, FATHER OF THOR)

POSEIDON: DA SEA ONE

HEPHAESTUS: DA FIRE/FORGING/STEEL ONE

APHRODITE: DA HOT ONE

KRATOS: GOD OF WAR

HADES: DA HELL ONE. ROGUE LIKE

APOLLO: DA DODGEBALL/PROPHECY ONE

[boxxed-juice]

ares is the god of war, not kratos

[cyber-corp]

WHY THE FUCK DOES THE GAME CALL HIM GOD OF WAR THEN

[ironwoman359]

I can't believe this post is less than 24 hours old, it feels like something out of classic tumblr lore

[mysticalblue09]

It just keeps going. Hey op, would like a shovel to dig that grave a little bit faster?

[cyber-corp]

*yelling out from 12 foot hole* NO THANK YOU

[6qubed]

I'm personally offended that you didn't mention Hestia, given how many times I've mentioned her on this post alone, as well as the obvious fact that Hestia is Bestia™

[imsopopfly]

I’m absolutely DYING at the mix up between Zeus and Odin. Can you imagine those two switching places?

[cyber-corp]

MAN FUCJING WHATEVER. LIGHTNING BOYS

[mortimermcmirestinks]

afaik odin doesn't have lightning powers and the kratos you're thinking of is a video game character who has close to no actual basis in mythology

[tazmanian-cigarette]

Also did OP play God of War? Bc you have to kill Ares in the first game. That's how Kratos becomes the God of War. The game was originally named for the revenge quest you have against the antagonist, Ares, the God of War. So. Familiarity with the God of War videogame franchise should inform a person that Kratos is not, in fact, the God of War in the Greek mythological canon.

[cyber-corp]

….i have not played god of war

[theconcealedweapon]

[eatpussypraylove]

Favorite adderall review

[joebidensbignaturals]

[ralfmaximus]

You have to watch the dosage.

[mortimermcmirestinks]

You have to watch the dosage.

[theconcealedweapon]

[mumblesplash]

scurvy has got to have one of the biggest disease/treatment coolness gaps of all time. like yeah too much time at sea will afflict you with a curse where your body starts unraveling and old wounds come back to haunt you like vengeful ghosts. unless☝️you eat a lemon

[kata4a]

[theconcealedweapon]

[i-am-a-fish]

I'm having a good time :)

[the-dragon-mizu]

i am not, sadly. my tummy hurts :(

[i-am-a-fish]

I'm going to absolve you of this pain. I will transfer the pain onto myself.

[i-am-a-fish]

ouuuuuuuughghhggggggggggggg,,,,,,,,,,,,, guuhhhggggh ooouughhhffgg :( oooouuumnhhhhhhhhh......

[static-cephalopod]

My tummy also hurts :(

Cheese pizza bad idea for lactose intolerant

[i-am-a-fish]

jussts. senfdb it. send it to me ,,,,., . I can Take it

[i-am-a-fish]

it's a few days later and I'm fighting for my life right now, this post actually worked and now I'm dying. this is what I signed up for so I'll take the punishment but like, my stomach has never hurt this much in my life.

my hubris

[i-am-a-fish]

[teffiebell]

[arch-user]

as a completely cis dude, I would press this button immediately, without question. There are a lot of things I would do for money, but shit I'd do this for like 20 bucks... maybe less?

[arch-user]

She said with all too much confidence

[melynnwaters]

A DAY!?!?!?

[resetium]

happy almost one year anniversary to arch-user having her realization in well under 24 hours

edit: i checked. it took 6 hours.

[earhartsease]

all hail the 1% (for once)

[theconcealedweapon]

[depsidase]

[god-has-entered-my-body]

i need a capri sun and then i need to be shot

[depsidase]

[depsidase]

[wizardarchetypes]

being an extremely light sleeper who doesn't go to bed until 3-4 am so no matter where i live my roommates & friends say stuff like, "wake us up if the tornado sirens go off, "wake us up if the tsunami sirens go off," "wake us up if that bear comes back by camp,"

when people say these things i can't help but feel i'm satisfying my evolutionary purpose as night guard. it's just easier now than it would've been for me 10,000 years ago bc i have a flashlight and a weather app.

[wizardarchetypes]

I'm a fisher price Rescue Heroes action figure

[parkchanwoohoo]

I finished putting together the Irish-American heritage month display and Jesus CHRIST there are so few books about Ireland in our collection?? Once more, I must say:

[parkchanwoohoo]

Oh and for the people who asked me last time what "a lot of stuff" entails

[parkchanwoohoo]

How the FUCK did I forget this

[applejongho]

"I feel so normal about him" well I dont. move

[thornsnvultures]