Randomness

Just some random stuff. Things that I find interesting and want to reblog. Don't expect a whole lotta original content.

[chaoticgouda]

[dungeonmastersdiary]

Forgetting a Campaign Detail

[systlin]

Note as someone who has visited and driven in most of the 48 lower contiguous states of the 50 small countries in a trenchcoat that make up the USA;

The drivers of all states suck, of course, this is a given. HOWEVER. There are some very special places that stand out among these. In order of how in fear for my life I was.

3. Houston. Drivers in Texas in general treat speed limits as a lower limit for how fast you should be going and the drivers in Houston show no regard for life or limb.

2. Atlanta. The drivers of Atlanta do not fear death for themselves and would rather you both die than let you merge.

Fucking. New Jersey. If I never drive I-95 or the Turnpike again I will die happy. You've never known fear until you see someone neglect to use turn signals and Jersey Slide through 4 lanes of near bumper to bumper 80 MPH traffic and cut in front of you to make their exit as you slam the brakes on and miss rear ending them by about half an inch.

On the flip side, the BEST driving I've ever seen? Suprisingly, New Orleans. Now, I went NOT during Mardi Gras, but I found the drivers there to be courtious and cautious with a very few exceptions. 10/10.

[the-seelie-court-official]

I've driven in at least 30 states and I'd like to add what my wife and i call "the D.C. vortex" wherein the closer you get to D.C., the more drivers act like they're the main characters of this 4 lane highway and have plot armor thicker than my dick

[yorickalas]

Never driven in the North-East but all over the rest of the continental US and Alaska.

Michigan: there’s either snow on the roads or they are torn up for road repair. This explains why they make left turns from right turn lanes down in Florida (and vice versa).

[systlin]

The well known seasons of the upper midwest, from someone who lives there

Winter

still winter

still still winter

false spring

second winter

mud

actual spring (3 days)

Road construction

Autumn (1 week)

Winter

You will often find the driving is better in winter because our potholes fill with ice!

[knittingontheroad]

Drivers from Indiana and Iowa are timid. They will not go 1 mph over the speed limit and they are entirely in the way, no matter what type of road you're on or what lane you're in.

Drivers from Minnesota SEEM polite. They use their turn signals! Then they will cut over in front of you 23 feet ahead (for reference, safe space in front of a semi is 200 feet).

Don't even get me started on Nashville (tgat we call Crashville)

[systlin]

As an Iowan driver, it's true.

Sometimes the most daring of us go a whole 5 miles over the speed limit! But don't count on it.

[simonbitdiddle]

Minnesota Nice ends as soon as that key turns in the ignition. I've seen the kindest people I've ever known go /feral/ at someone who inches forward at a stop light.

[depsidase]

[isuggestrevolution]

i have a suggestion

[red-garden]

“Do dishes” and “take out trash” both require the use of a spell slot, vs “use phone” is a cantrip, and brother, I am a level one wizard

[wolfsilverlight]

As a D&D goober...this 100% accurate.

[slimepost-generator]

you're so beautifol :) may i sense you with my feelers

[technicolorcrows]

of course! let me just-

(source)

[dungeonmastersdiary]

screw you dice!

[the-big-mood]

During a high speed car chase pursuit, the FOX 11 Los Angeles helicopter had an unexpected moment when they spotted a rooster and a chicken casually walking down the sidewalk right in the middle of the pursuit.

[reblogmonstah]

The fact that they were walking 1-3mph

His joy and whimsy at seeing this

His acknowledgement of it not being as interesting as the chase

His little "huh" cuz you know they told him to focus

[anthonycrowley]

every time i search where a movie is streaming and it’s not on like one of the big streamers i whisper to myself ‘poob has it for you’

[anthonycrowley]

one of the most poobified movies i’ve ever seen

[probablyfunrpgideas]

Spell Idea: Leomund’s Horrendous Oubliette (Level 7 Conjuration) Components: Verbal, Somatic, Material (a tooth from a False Hydra)

This spell affects the target as Banishment, sending them to a harmless demiplane. While there, they do not need to eat or drink. However, the duration of the spell is different. When the target fails its saving throw and disappears, all creatures who witnessed the spell forget that you cast it. You forget that you ever had access to Leomund’s Horrendous Oubliette, and even the existence of such a spell - it vanishes from your spellbook and list of spells known. You can subconsciously make up an explanation for the target’s disappearance - they fled, or teleported away, or fell into the nearby well. If your target succeeds on its save, you retain your memories.

There is no save against the memory loss, but creatures affected by it can make an Intelligence check against (2+your spell save DC) if they actively probe their missing memories.

The target can escape from your Oubliette in three ways: first, if they can use Plane Shift or a similar ability (though they must make a Wisdom save against your spell DC). Second, they or an ally can cast Wish or Gate to make a way out. And third, if you learn and cast Leomund’s Horrendous Oubliette again, the previous prisoner is freed!

[scribefindegil]

I was in a long-term relationship that fell apart partially because I was ace and my partner was very much not, and every time we looked for relationship help we got told that I was the problem. Not just that a significant mismatch in sexual desire could be a problem in a relationship, but that it was My Fault, Specifically, for not being willing to suck it up and have a bunch of sex I didn't want. To my ex's credit, he cared about consent much more than any of the professionals we talked to and refused to pressure me even when my (lesbian, billed as progressive and pro-LGBT) therapist was actively telling him to.

But it meant that we had absolutely no help or support when we were trying to work on the relationship in ways that *did* value my autonomy. There's basically no advice for people who want to try to make a relationship where there's a big desire gap work that isn't "well you should just have sex anyway" or "just break up lol". And that sucks!

Sometimes breaking up is necessary, and that's what ended up happening with us because there were other reasons we worked better as friends, but there *should* be better frameworks for discussing what people want and need that don't automatically assume that one partner's feelings are automatically more important or valuable than the other's.

[geese-in-flight]

I was dating someone who wanted to be accommodating and work with me to figure things out but lacked the EQ to do so in any effective way. It was my first relationship and I was still figuring out what being ace meant for me. It’s been eight or nine years, but I still remember very clearly the moment I realized we’d been approaching the entire discussion as if my orientation was the problem to be solved, and that it would be equally as valid to say that hers was.

She was significantly less impressed with this revelation than I was, but I tried to hold on to it ever since (although obviously the real problem wasn’t either one of us, but the mismatch and the lack of tools to deal with it). I think it’s super important to remember that we aren’t the ones in the wrong while our theoretical partners are the ones in the right. I was surprised by how much I’d internalized the assumption and I don’t think I’m the only one.

[ineffectualdemon]

The other frustrating aspect of this is allo relationships will often have periods of time where libido does not match (I'm not derailing and this will swing back to asexual people)

Just after giving birth, during a family crisis, during a mental health episode, during health problems, during stressful periods at work

There are a lot of times when one person is horned up and raring to go and the other has no interest

And the solution often presented is that the person who is going through something should just put out because they are the problem instead of like...finding ways to engage in non sexual intimacy to reaffirm closeness

An asexual person is going to get 10x the amount of pressure and blame put on them and no advice on how non-sexual intimacy can help their relationships and if they get that at all it will only be to sell it as a bridge to sex they don't want.

I really hate the selling of intimacy as only equaling or facilitating sex. Intimacy comes in many forms and should be explored more by every couple as a non sexual act. And it the given importance it deserves. In fact I would argue if we as a society put more value on non sexual intimacy more relationships would be happier and healthier

And asexual people would stop getting shit for being themselves.

[the-haiku-bot]

And asexual

people would stop getting shit

for being themselves.

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[hylianengineer]

All of this, in ace AND allo relationships alike, is toxic as fuck. If someone is trying to pressure you into sex you don't want: that is wrong. That is sexual harassment at best and potentially sexual assault.

As an asexual, there are a lot of things I wish allos would learn from us. Right now I want you all to understand we ALL deserve better than this. Consent fucking matters, and sexual assault or harassment within a relationship is NOT okay!

[evelasco-art]

THIS is so true:

In fact I would argue if we as a society put more value on non sexual intimacy more relationships would be happier and healthier.

So many people put such a heavy pressure on sex to fulfill all or almost all intimacy needs in romantic relationships, because they haven’t learnt or considered other forms of intimacy. Because sex seems simple and straightforward, and socially has been constructed to be a way to measure romantic love. And there’s just so much more ways to connect beyond sex.

I myself was in a relationship with an allo guy for 9 years, and was pressured into doing all sorts of things I didn’t want to do, which left me badly scarred to this day. Seeked professional help, was told I was the problem and needed fixing, which kept me in that abusive relationship for a long time out of guilt. The “fixing”, as it turned out, only traumatized me further and didn’t change me (oh, surprise, conversion therapies don’t work!).

Thankfully I ended up breaking up with the guy.

I’ve now been in a long-term romantic relationship with another allo person for some years, and it’s working. Because there are SO MANY ways to connect and feel fulfilled in a relationship aside from sex. All it takes is being kind, thoughtful and curious.

Never let anyone make you feel that your asexuality is a problem. It isn’t. It’s just another part of who you are. A beautiful, enriching, meaningful one. It should be embraced and honoured by your romantic partners, allo or not.

Sadly not all allo people will understand. But that doesn’t make you the problem. If they can’t see past sex into the infinite potential ways of human connection, the problem is theirs.

And, if it doesn’t work, it doesn’t work. But it will NOT be your fault for being ace.

[systlin]

Getting down on my knees and thanking the humans who invented dishwashers and washing machines.

[ihonestlydontknowwhattocallthis]

InsNe that dishwashers are more efficient and easier than just washing them manually but they also use less water. It’s a win win situation

[systlin]

They ALSO sterilize dishes, due to operating at a far higher temperature than human hands could ever tolerate. It's a win every way.

[systlin]

Made this post about 15 minutes after the repair guy who fixed the pump on my dishwasher packed up his tools and left, as the dishwasher was whirring along doing my dishes from that morning.

He said the exact same thing, which I did not know before that, so spreading this knowledge.

[sexygrammaticalerrors]

[scribefindegil]

I'm still thinking about the guy who saw me realize my wheelchair wouldn't fit in the elevator because he (also a wheelchair user) was already inside it and immediately quipped, "This elevator ain't accessible enough for the both of us."

[imkeepinit]

Judith Butler, philosopher: ‘If you sacrifice a minority like trans people, you are operating within a fascist logic’

[directactionforhope]

Feels like a good time to remind certain people that this is coming from Judith Butler, who is not just a leading feminist philosopher, but also THE COFOUNDER OF QUEER THEORY

The literal cofounder of queer theory as an academic field says that abandoning trans people is fascist logic.

The voices in our community trying to exclude us may be loud, but they are not right, and they do not speak for the community as a whole or our history or anything at all.

Trans people belong here. We always have, and we always will.

[millenniallust4death]

I’m paying to force seven thousand strangers to see a photo of my late husband having fun with his dog. Tumblr Blaze is totally worth it. XD

[millenniallust4death]

Thank-you to all of my new Internet stranger friends for being so gracious about having my post shoved onto your dashboards. I loved reading all of your kind tags and comments! Both Martin and Bosco have been gone for several years now but for 24 hours, they felt very present in my life. I greatly appreciate this gift. ❤️

[psycorax]

Reblog to have your dashboard be visited by the spirit of joy that death can end but not erase.

[millenniallust4death]

Thank you to everyone who commented in their tags or messaged me. Indeed, today is “Martin and Bosco Day”. I originally whimsically blazed this photo on 13 July 2022. I never expected Martin and Bosco to travel so far and make so many new friends. The experience has been such a gift for me.

[vrabia]

ambitious indie project this, surprise box-office hit that, iron lung (production budget: $3mil) is the 'someone who is good at the economy please help me budget this, my family is dying' tweet.

[vrabia]

set construction: $800

cast & crew wages: $1,200 + uber eats

fake blood (assuming generous discount on bulk purchase): $2,000,000 i am so not kidding i did the math this is nuts

editing: average adult body-weight equivalent in monster energy drinks

[vrabia]

update when markiplier announced he's producing the dvd/blu-ray himself i was like cool he's personally supervising the process and then he was like no i mean i'm making them myself at my house and i imagined some kind of complicated gargantuan contraption dutifully chugging along 24/7 blowing up this man's electricity bill and then he was like

anyway if you buy an iron lung dvd/blu-ray: it was made on a printer-sized machine. at markiplier's house.

[vrabia]

since this post unexpectedly blew up i'd like to note that the $2mil. of fake blood thing is unconfirmed and based on some rough calculations i did after googling 'fake blood price per gallon'. i'm sure they were able to get a more significant discount on the kind of bulk purchase that cleared all stock available in the state of wherever this movie was filmed, but i have no source. the rest of those numbers are what we in the industry call a funnypost

the dvd/blu-ray production was confirmed on a livestream i caught accidentally while dicking around on youtube that is now members only (likely this one but idk, i don't have youtube membership money). other things confirmed in that stream: the dvd/blu-ray burner cost $4k and iirc burns 8 blu-rays an hour. markiplier's one concession to productivity is that he might get a second burner so he can make 16 blu-rays an hour, at his house.