Archer141

he/she/they. 20. Spoiler warning for aftg, SoC, Hazbin Hotel, Dead Boy Detetives and Stranger Things

[astriiformes]

To be quite honest with you all I do think that aro/ace-spectrum fans in fandoms where people are desperately inventing crossover ships and humanizing non-human characters in order to have a conventionally attractive guy to ship the main character with, instead of possibly having to enjoy a story with no romance in it, have the right to refer to everyone else as cowards.

[astriiformes]

Sorry you almost had to entertain the idea that people like me exist, I'm sure that was very painful for you.

[robs-your-robins]

imagine Clark brings up Lois to the Watchtower to meet the other 7, but he forgot to tell Bruce, so he's just chilling there in his normal clothes and to cover it up he just does his best Martian Manhunter impression and tells them he's practicing his sense of humor. After all, why would a billionaire himbo be in a space station full of superheroes?

Lois and Clark appear at the Watchtower and Bruce is literally napping on a nearby sofa in his sweatpants, fluffy socks, Gotham Knights hoodie with a hot water bottle tucked under his arm because all the kids are home and the house is too noisy, and everything is sticky and messy. Lois is like, "Clark, who's hooking up with Bruce Wayne?" because she's here as a spouse afterall and Clark just panics and says "Oliver Queen" forgetting that Lois doesn't know that Ollie is Green Arrow which gets Lois wondering why so many hot young billionaires are up at the tower and suddenly, she's back on the whole secret harem thing.

[cheshireinthemiddle]

Oh, this definitely belongs on Tumblr.

[thesplendidsnout]

From the Nib, by Mattie Lubchansky

[the-sparrows-providence]

can you imagine the in-universe conversations between Exy fans and their Unaware parents fully not understanding that Exy and lacrosse are two completely different sports.

“How have your lacrosse teams been doing?”

“It’s not lacrosse, mom, it’s Exy.”

“But they both use racquets?”

“Yes, but—”

“So then whats the difference between the two??”

“…Well, one of them has a disproportionate number of players associated with international mafia networks.”

[natalieironside]

There's always a moment of intense cultural whiplash whenever I realize I'm talking to someone who thinks "legal" and "illegal" are meaningful categories and ascribes innate goodness to following the law. It's like meeting a space alien.

[rederiswrites]

Just watched Adam Conover (of Adam Ruins Everything) make such a solid point that I think we should spread far and wide. Yes, having AI write your emails is lazy, sure, but people love being lazy. We need to really emphasize that sending AI emails (or using AI responses on social media, or publishing AI flyers, or or or) is rude.

It's rude. You're making someone take their time to read something you couldn't bother to write. You're telling them they were so unimportant you couldn't be bothered to actually take the time to say something yourself. And frankly, you're lying about it while you're at it.

It's rude.

[robs-your-robins]

The Bats have this running joke of convincing people that Tim is a cryptid taken in by the family. In a family of arguably strange people, the rest of them decided that it would be hilarious if they started rumours that Tim is some kind of creature. Jason and Steph whispering frantically amongst themselves that Tim got out again and scramble to leave a function that leaves other heroes like 'what the hell?' Damian is ordering a lot of raw meat over the phone (it's for Goliath, Titus and Ace and the hyena he's petsitting for Harley) and the Teen Titans ask how come because he is a vegetarian, is he feeding the meat to the bats in the Cave and Damian just looks a little disturbed and goes, 'No, it's for... Tim.' Cass excusing herself from a gathering at the Manor where Tim is absent, lugging bucket of fish to somewhere in the house. And not to mention the eerie voice notes that is mostly growling and snarling and garbled incantations that Dick quickly pauses when somebody wanders into earshot. And the strange leaked footage filmed by Duke of a vaguely contorted silhouette of Tim, hunched on a rooftop, the eyes of his domino mask just catching the light just so before he scrambles to attack the camera.

[sthilarions]

Charles as Edwin’s dog but in the way that a dog is a captive cheetah’s. Emotional support dog for an animal that could theoretically be a record-setting predator and absolutely has the capacity to bite through your spine but 99% of the time is an anxious mess that will shake itself to death at highway speeds without The Dog

[oboy049]

What if in the future the 7 wonders of the world doesn’t exist, in booster gold they explain most of the past data got erased since the world basically almost got obliterated and society wasn’t that avance since basically they rebuilt it from scratch

So booster, all focus on yk knowing English and common lingo, plus the whole getting use to this new life, ofc hadn’t got time to learn more about general culture

I just imagine him on those random interviews from TikTok that ask basic knowledge and ofc he would accept bc duh publicity

Tiktoker: what are the seven wonders of the world

Booster: the 7 wonders? Uhh life, peace, friendship… uh

And the tiktoker founding gold he just nods along prompting him to keep talking : friendship?! Ofc!

Booster: loyalty, knowledge I’m very wise, respect, and the most important love

To Clark that confirmed this new hero is an complete idiot, others where just joking around saying things like “I thought he knew nothing but he knew everything” and “is this Socrates?”

And it makes you wonder how many things that are common knowledge, someone like Booster gold wouldn’t even know being back in the past

Maybe even flags change colors, or the ocean level grew in some places so the Pacific Ocean now isn’t the biggest one, there can be new world records, etc

So people will try to mock him and he keeps getting this “wise” yet wrong answers

[cherryhatter-deactivated2015072]

KICK THE CAN!

Let’s play the biggest game of kick the can on the internet.

To kick the can, reblog it. I wanna see how long this can go on for.

[visibun]

the oldest reblogs for this post that i can find are from january 2nd of 2013. this can has been getting kicked around tumblr for almost 13½ years now

[drtanner]

And yet somehow this is my first time kicking it!

[solarprominence]

I maintain that the best summation of my feminist beliefs are that men and women are not fundamentally different. There are a few quantifiable differences if you average out every woman and every man, but they are not qualitative. And most of them are socially constructed, and would be fixed if we started treating men and women the same. Neither is inherently smarter, neither is inherently kinder, neither is inherently more stoic or stronger or angrier or softer. Everyone is obsessed with the differences between women and men, with finding them and creating them and distancing themselves from the "other half". It's fucked up

[embervoices]

Agreed. As many kinds of humans, our centers of variance are inevitably well within each other's ranges of variance. The differences are far, far smaller than the commonalities.

I get where a lot of it comes from - humans need to categorize because the world is Too Big to itemize it all.

But we have a lamentable tendency to then use those categories as morally qualitative when they are at best circumstantially quantitative.

*Deep sigh*

[sockth]

Hey if you See This can you reblog this or comment on this with a character you headcanon as aromantic, asexual, or both. It can be canon it can be founded on absolutely nothing I just need more aroace stuff on here #yay

[robs-your-robins]

Hear me out Bruce as Holt but he talks about his kids as much and how Terry talks about his daughters

Bruce: I was reviewing last night’s patrol logs when I was struck by a profound realization. My children are extraordinary. Hal: Oh? Did one of them stop a supervillain? Bruce: No. Something far more impressive. Duke successfully parallel‑parked the Batmobile on the first attempt. The Batmobile. A vehicle the size of a small maritime vessel. Hal: That… actually is impressive. Bruce: I felt a swell of paternal pride so powerful I nearly exhaled audibly.

[nvexe]

my pronouns are she/her bc I'll never be him (anthony head playing on his pink ds in full costume on the set of merlin)

[pretty-pendragon]

rest in peace, Anthony ❤️

[queernightly]

I feel like Bernard's mother could reach out eventually, you know? There are a lot of ways her marriage and her relationship with Bernard can be expanded on. But anyways this:

Bernard: Hey, Tim? My mom messaged me earlier. She says she wants to talk.

Tim: Seriously? She wants to talk? After all this time?

Bernard: Maybe I should give her a chance. Listen to what she has to say....

Tim: No! Don't give her a chance!

Bernard: Tim-

Tim: Fuck your mom!

Bernard: ....

Bernard, smirking: You weren't happy when I said that about your stepmom. Such double standards,Timothy.

Tim, red in the face: Fuck you, Bern.

Bernard: That's the spirit.

[enjolbear]

I hate x reader fics with a burning passion. These are are my dolls not my friends. Get me outta there

[papayafromtv]

every now and then i remember how funny the lego batman Dick Grayson adoption story was. like, Dick was just a fanboy in an orphanage who decided it would be cool if Bruce Wayne was his dad, so when he met Bruce he straight up just asked if Bruce would adopt him, and Bruce wasn't listening to a word this kid was saying because he was distracted, so he just assumed Dick wanted an autograph and signed the adoption documents in Dick's hands, and then he just got in his car and drove off. Alfred had to be the one to go back and get him, just sighing as he opened the car door like 'well, i guess it's legal now, you better get in'. like that's gotta be top ten funniest fucking ways for Bruce to adopt a kid. i think that method should be used more, and i personally think it should be used by Tim.

like- fanboy/stalker child Timothy Drake; knows his parents suck and he decides he wants a new dad. and who would be fucking better than the man he knows for a fact to be Batman?! i want Tim to straight-faced no fear just march up to Bruce during some kind of event with guardianship papers he's already forged his parents signature on, deciding to face-to-face randomly ask this man to be his new dad.

Bruce is not paying attention to anything this kid says, by the way. Bruce is trying to leave the event because Jason's with him and he wants the kid to get an early night before school the next morning. there's press and people asking for pictures swarming the street between him and his car. it's too loud, he's got Jason clinging to his hand and trying to keep up from behind, and there's so many people clamouring for his attention that when this little kid somehow manages to slip up to his side, paper and pen in hand, that he vaguely remembers as one of the kids in his neighbourhood, Bruce just quickly scrawls his signature where the kid points and then tries to shove the paparazzi back again.

Jason's the only one who notices, having tuned out all the other visual and audio mess because he trusted Bruce to handle it. when he sees the glee on Tim's face his hand slips from Bruce, and while the man steps away to demand everybody clear a pathway to his car for him and his kid, he leans over and actually reads what Bruce just signed.

he looks at the paper. he looks at Tim. he looks at the paper.

it's genuinely the funniest fuck up he's ever seen the man do. he visibly has to hold back laughter as he claps Tim on the shoulder and solemnly declares, "welcome to the family, weirdo." before Bruce reaches back to grab him by the sleeve and tug him away again.

Tim goes home to pack his bags and then smugly shows up at Wayne Manor the next day, where Jason lets him in and shows him to one of the empty bedrooms. Alfred spots them and stops for a minute, wondering if this is something he should be involved in. then the kettle goes off and he figures it's not his problem. Bruce does not clock that there is another person unpacking and starting to live in his house until Tim sits next to him at the dinner table and no-shame starts referring to him as dad while Jason gives him the most shit-eating grin imaginable.