Underground Hamster Rave

[duplicitous-nature]

[justiceleague]

Aquaman (2018)

[ariellymm]

PERMISSION GRANTED

[justiceleague]

[zhouxuns]

suddenly these moments make so much sense

[ariellymm]

When people talkin shit about my friends whom I love deeply

[averagefairy]

i haven’t been able to forget this guy’s look from school of rock ever since i first saw that movie i was only 9 but i knew he was serving

[worrdless]

Demitri Martin once said,

“I saw a guy at a party wearing a leather jacket and I thought, “That is cool.” But then I saw another guy wearing a leather vest and I thought, “That is not cool.” Then I figured it out: ‘Cool’ is all about leather sleeves.””

and you know what? spot on.

[ariellymm]

Who IS HEEEE

[spaceyjules-deactivated20180305]

If you call pedophilia a kink please unfollow me and never talk to me again

[spaceyjules-deactivated20180305]

Isn’t it disgusting that 23 people just unfollowed me

[clarknokent]

Unfollow me too

[gothhabiba]

this goes double if you call paedophilia a disability. unfollow me twice

[closet-keys]

and if you call pedophilia an “orientation” or in any way compare it to being LGBP+ you can unfollow, delete your blog, and set yourself on fire. 

[peachypastel]

I just lost 50 followers.. bye

[katiemcgrxth]

clearing out the trash

[bway-grimes]

GO ON AND S M A S H THAT UNFOLLOW BUTTON

[moonedknights]

BUHBYE U McNASTIES

[bogleech]

I’ve seen this circulating forever and genuinely thought “no way do I have any of them following me” until this week when it turned out I had all these fuckin “MAP” (pedophile) followers sad to find out I’m an “anti” (normal person) Please leave and also please get guinea worm.

[flerpdederp]

GET THE FUCK OUTTA MY BLOG

[bunchofdoodlesinspace]

I reblogged something similar to this a while ago but again:

if you support pedophilia,

kindly get the fuck off of my blog.

Thanks.

[princet-ofthe-rivers]

I reblog these regularly.

STAY OFF MY BLOOOOOOG

[littlebabiebear]

Shoo fly, don’t bother me👋🏾

[fragilelikeabomb0106]

Pedophilia is not welcome in the LGBTQ+ community nor are MAPs or pedophilia apologizers welcome on any of my blogs. If you support pedophilia, unfollow me. My blog is a safe space but I will not tolerate the sexualization of children.

[artaeum]

Add zoophilia and zoophiles to that

[luna-deegan-blog]

Get out you grotty fucks

[dajo42]

if you dont have me on facebook you are probably not missing out on any posts but the comment section is important too lmao

I went to the Renaissance faire dressed as a warrior.  I had a real sword with me, too.  I was standing (in character) next to a sword-fighting ring, where kids of all ages got the chance to pick up a sword and challenge the champion.  Some woman walks by, with her little girl.  The girl starts walking towards the ring, saying she wants to fight.  But the mom pulled her away hella sharply, and was like, “That’s for boys.”  You don’t want to be a BOY, do you?”    And the girl looked around and saw me.  I think she thought I was a boy; I had my hair in a ponytail, and was wearing a hood.  So she comes up to me and asks me, “Do you think girls can be fighters, too?”  And her mom looks like she’s silently gloating.  Like she thinks I’m going to say no.  So I take off my hood, untie my hair so that it flows freely, and kneel before her.  And I’m like, “Milady, anyone can be a fighter.”  I swear, the look on that mother’s face made my day.

[maneth985]

[luxgalador]

This post was good but then it got better

[celticshenanigans]

Okay, this is a slight topic diversion, but in response to the above comment. I’ve volunteered at the CT Ren Faire for years now. For the last 5 or so I’ve worked in the game section, and we have a game similar to the above comment called “Smite the Knight”. I’ve been in the ring before, it’s a ton of fun getting to run around with the kids. The main goal is entertainment. Have a good shtick, keep the crowd engaged, and let the kids have a good time.

In both work and observing, I have learned something about kids. A lot of parents try to get their boys to go fight. Of the young ones that do, they tend to be shy. You get the ones who just swing the boffer swords around with no regard for life, but, mostly, they’re reserved. It’s adorable. I mean, they’re kids.

But the girls. THE GIRLS. Holy crap. I swear, the pinker the dress, the more taffeta and glitter…the more intensity. I remember, the first year I worked there, one girl came in, grabbed the biggest sword she could, and WENT TO TOWN on our knight. Lifted it over head, let out this primal scream and mowed him down. Homeboy is 6′2″, she was FIVE. And once he was in the fetal position (He was fine. It was for show.) on the ground, she stopped, put her foot on his chest, and yelled “I AM A FIERCE PRINCESS!!”. Later in the day when she walked by a couple of us yelled “Ah! It’s the fierce princess!” and she stopped and flexed. It was the best, and I will never forget that girl.

[complete-in-ix-deactivated20230]

OH MY GOD IT’S BACK YES

[the-ironhobbit-deactivated20170]

This has improved since last I reblogged.

[tinierpurplefishes]

I taught karate for like 5 years, and the girls were always, pound for pound, better than the boys. Even the girls who didn’t really want to do it and were only there because their parents made them were better than like 95% of the boys.

[shadesofmauve]

I was playing fiddle at a ren faire, and two little girls were really enjoying our set. After quite some time one of them walked up to me and shyly offered me her star tinsel tiara, because she “didn’t have any money. And this protects you from trolls!” I said “Thanks, that’s really sweet – but what about you? Don’t you need protection from trolls?”

At which point this six-ish-year-old girl whips out her certificate from the axe throwing booth and says “Nah, I’m fine.”

I still have that tinsel tiara. It’s draped over my modem. I figure it’ll protect me from the most trolls that way.

[callmebliss]

I am not in the habit of reblogging a post and slapping an “it got better” on there BUT I SAY GOTDAMN

[bob-belcher]

[ariellymm]

These are the real questions

[jedavu]

Honest Posters of Our Relationship with Technology

Designer Ajit Johnson, living in England, has imagined a series of posters called “#This_Generation”. With honesty, the posters show anecdotes linked to our daily relationship with technology and social networks.

[thelunarboy]

[blur-berry]

“Can’t work a computer to it’s full potential or send an email, proceeds to ask someone a 1/3 to ½ their age for help.” #LastGeneration

“Can’t accept the fact that meaningful relationships can be made online, struggles to respect and accept said relationships.” #LastGeneration

“Has drained and abused the Earth for it’s resources, and believes that a young person would choose internet over survival. Expects us to survive and solve the problems they have created.“ #LastGeneration

“Does not understand that phones are meant for communication, also does not understand that the average semester lasts 4 months.” #LastGeneration

“Refuses to give proper sex education, shames the younger generation for not knowing.” #Last Generation

“Does not understand how social media works and that not deleting/avoiding your recent ex online is just as bad as seeing them every day.” #LastGeneration

“Also texts and drives, pretends that they are not responsible for any accidents caused by their idiot mistakes.” #LastGeneration

“Shames teenagers for taking photos of themselves that make them feel positive about their physical image, probably can’t work the camera themselves.]” #LastGeneation

“Believes that a person’s way of texting with people they are comfortable with is a sign of their intelligence level, texts just as bad, if not worse.” #LastGeneration

“Believes our generation are internet druggies, does not even acknowledge our reasons for being online, or what we do online.” #LastGeneration

“Has caused wars, economic failures, environmental disasters, perpetuated hate based on gender/race/sexuality/religion [or lack of]/and more, pretends that the younger generation is the problem.”  #LastGeneration

[deactivated555-deactivated20171]

Whoop there it is

[akitron]

did he not……make these on a computer though…lmao.;……

[ariellymm]

🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

[luxeforum]

[kittnpaws]

oh god, they were roommates

[trunchbull]

This straight guy, who we’ll call Mike, has been roommates with Alex for a year. When Alex told Mike he was gay, he was absolutely fine with it. But then when Alex started to bring guys home…he started getting annoyed, resentful, disgusted.

Posting on Reddit, he said: ‘First things first, let me say that I’ve never thought of myself as being discriminatory before. I had a gay friend in high school and we made it through some tough times together, I never felt weird about him dating a guy. So all of this is coming out of nowhere.

‘”Alex” has been my roommate for one year, and I pretty much knew upfront about him being gay. At some point we became friendly enough with each other that we could even joke about it, as in, sometimes he’ll pretend to flirt with me and I’ll pretend to flirt back. I’m straight and he knows that, but I don’t feel threatened by him flirting with me and he says most straight guys do.

‘The problems started because of this: Alex brings guys home sometimes. At the start I thought I was okay with it, since it’s really not my business who he sleeps with. He’s usually discreet enough about it that I don’t see/hear anything I wouldn’t want to see/hear from anyone else, but for some reason I’ve started feeling weird if I even see him with other guys.

‘I don’t know when it started but one time that really sticks out to me is when I came home and saw him and some guy making out on the couch. I don’t know how to describe what it was like to see that, except that for a moment I felt so bad I thought I was going to throw up. Alex was embarrassed (he didn’t think I’d be back for a while), but I told him it was okay since I was embarrassed too.

‘I felt bad for being as disgusted as I was, since there’s NO good reason for me to have a reaction like that. I thought maybe they just caught me by surprise and that’s why I reacted so strongly, but it turned out it wasn’t a one-time thing. After that, every time he has a guy over (not that often, but every once in a while) I just start feeling like shit and wishing that guy would leave, and I can’t stop thinking about what these guys might have done to him even though I don’t want to imagine that. It makes me really uncomfortable and grossed out. And these are just guys he fools around with, I don’t know what I’d do if he ends up getting an actual boyfriend.

‘Alex has started to notice and it’s affecting our friendship. The other day I came home right when some guy was about to leave, and the guy tried to be polite to me but I ended up being rude to him (don’t remember what I said, but it was really obvious I was pissed). When the guy left, Alex asked me why I was being an asshole. I didn’t know what to say, but then he asked if I had a problem with him sleeping with other guys. I said no. For some reason that pissed him off more and he said I can’t complain since I used to bring my fuckbuddy over and he was forced to see me being affectionate with her sometimes. (I was in an FWB situation with a girl in the early days of me and Alex living together, but I broke it off after a few months and I haven’t done anything with anyone since.) I agreed with him and told him I was just having a bad day and I don’t care who he sleeps with, but he looked more upset and told me he’s going to a friend’s place to cool off. I said okay. When he was leaving for some reason he casually said, “and you’ll be okay if I sleep with him as long as I do at his place and not ours, right?” Or something like that. I told him it’s none of my business what he does at someone else’s place, but when he said that I felt sick to my stomach and couldn’t stop thinking about it.

‘He didn’t show up later that night even though he was supposed to hang out with me and my sister. He’s never blown me off before and it made me feel like shit, but part of it was my fault since I made him feel like I was judging him for sleeping with guys. Now he’s acting like nothing happened but I’m worried I might mess things up if it happens again. I want to keep him as a friend, but he’d be hurt if he knew that whenever I think about him with other guys it disgusts me.

‘How do I deal with this? I’ve never been homophobic but I’ve suddenly developed some kind of homophobia where just the idea of my roommate’s sex life makes me uncomfortable. And I don’t react like this to other gay people either, it’s just Alex. I don’t know if this means I’m only okay with gay people as long as I’m not living with them or what. Does anyone else have experience with this? I want to get over myself and stop whatever this is, but if I can’t I’m going to have to leave since the last thing I want to do is hurt Alex, and if I stay here and keep automatically judging him for his lifestyle that’s what’s going to happen.

‘tl;dr: Roommate is gay, I am not but I thought I was okay with him being gay until I realised I feel crappy when I see him with other guys and it’s started to affect our friendship. How to deal with this/stop being such a dick?’

One Redditor asked: ‘Are you sure that weird feeling isn’t jealousy…? i mean, this only seems to revolve around Alex specifically.’

And Mike responded: ‘I thought about that, but I don’t know what I’m meant to be jealous of. He definitely has a more active sex life than I do, but reacting like this to something like that seems really strange and irrational.’

The Redditor responded: ‘Yeah i thought maybe you don’t like seeing Alex with other people because you want his attention to yourself?’

‘The day I made the post, I met up with my sister Laura [24F] and I showed her the post. She read the whole thing and called me an oblivious walnut and said it sounds like I have a crush on Alex. The same conclusion some of you came to in the original post.

‘Anyway, she talked me through it and we confirmed I’m not as straight as I thought I was. She also pointed out something in my original post, where I said the more I tried to reassure him I didn’t mind who he slept with, the more he got upset. Also: how he brought my old FWB situation into it. I just thought he was understandably mad with me for being an asshole, but Laura thought it sounded like maybe Alex wanted me to be jealous? We moved on from that topic pretty quickly, though, since I couldn’t really handle the implications of that when I’d JUST started to understand that I like this guy.

‘The next few days were mostly me sitting on my ass trying to wrap my head around everything. I was scared of messing up our friendship and losing him, but I was even more scared that I might just let this pass without saying anything and then he gets a boyfriend and I have to see him with another guy…etc. Because if that happened I would probably have to end it anyway, since as we’ve established, I’m not great at dealing with him being with other guys.

‘Probably could have planned it better, but I told him. Right after a Tarantino marathon, if anyone’s interested, since nothing says romance like graphic violence. I told him I’ve been such a dick because I was jealous. I don’t think he got what I was getting at because he just laughed a little and said I didn’t have to be jealous since it wasn’t like I’d have any trouble finding people to sleep with me. No clue how I explained, it’s a blur. Luckily he saw how nervous I was so he knew I was serious.

‘We talked. Long story short: all that flirting was real, but Alex didn’t have any hope of it going further because of me being an oblivious “straight” guy. So he’s been trying to get over me. He laughed really hard when I told him about how I mistook my jealousy for homophobia, and he teased me by saying he’d never expected me to be the jealous type. Then again, we both ended up laughing a lot of out of nervousness and awkwardness. I’ve never seen him like that before since he’s usually pretty confident. In the end we agreed to maybe try something out, and we kissed. Never kissed anyone with a beard before, so…interesting experience, but also really good. (Plot twist: it turns out I don’t have any problem with Alex kissing guys if it’s me he’s kissing.)

‘Since then we’ve kind of been easing into the whole dating thing, I guess? I know this place is wary about roommate relationships and I get why, but it’s been great so far. We had our first proper date last weekend and it was incredible, though a bit weird since we’ve done that a thousand times already and this time there was a new context. At home we still do our normal thing, but sometimes we get distracted. Last night I almost burned dinner because I had to kiss him and we got kind of carried away, haha. We’re taking the whole sex thing slow though since I’ve never done anything with another guy before.

‘I’m a little worried about coming out to my family and my other friends, especially since this is almost as new for me as it would be for them. My parents are very openminded and my mom especially loves Alex. But I have some more conservative family members on my dad’s side, and I can already imagine them blaming Alex for turning me gay. They can also be pretty racist (Laura’s boyfriend is Latino so she knows all about that) and Alex is mixed. It’s something to think about in the longterm, I guess. Alex has said he doesn’t expect me to jump out of the closet right away, but if we end up calling ourselves a couple then I’m not going to keep him a secret or anything.

‘So…we’re trying. And I am not a homophobe, and nobody needed therapy. Honestly, I can’t remember the last time I was this happy, and I never would have expected this when I made that first post. It’s a good thing some of you picked up on the actual problem and tried to get it through to me despite me being an oblivious walnut, so…thanks, guys.’

Funniest self-realization in the world? ‘Plot twist: it turns out I don’t have any problem with Alex kissing guys if it’s me he’s kissing.’

[artemuscain-gamingandbs]

This was…. cute???

[decidedly-indecisive-bruh]

I need updates

[hipstermun-deactivated20150212]

[cloperella]

that was awesome

[lizawithazed]

this delights me

[burglethoseturts-blog-deactivat]

I TELL EVERYONE ABOUT THIS VIDEO BUT I NEVER FOUND IT AGAIN BUT HERE IT IS YEEES

[sushinfood]

I LOVE IT WHEN STUDENTS JUST DECIDE TO DO THEIR OWN FUN THING AND IT SOUNDS SO GREAT SINCE THEY ALL LOVE IT

[microcroft]

@schrodingers-kitty-cat

[tag-redfield]

Everytime this comes around, it’s still just as amazing

[millennial-review-deactivated20]

[airyairyquitecontrary-deactivat]

This post makes a good point but can I just say what a bloody surreal couple of years we’ve all been having that we have a context for this.

[ariellymm]

I, for one am very irritated with how difficult it is to open my goddamn laundry detergent.

[ariellymm]

The 6 months of my sons life.

[star-anise]

it has been a long week and i am very tired

pls show me your cats

[ishuzu]

this is Buster, showing us her very dirty feet.

[1000heartbeats]

This is Dany. He has anxiety, but he’s full of love.

[errantpixxi]

This is Tally, a 10 yo 18 pound Maine Coon, who will let you use her tummy for a pillow when you’re sad, and will just purr & groom you until you feel better 💕

[madamehardy]

This is Jareth, a rescue who advises you to consider the benefits of a good long nap

[nonelvis]

This is Miss Noir. Her hobbies include being besties with the food bag, running away from things in fear, and stairstep lurking.

This is Miss Nicole. Her hobbies include being an immense asshole.

[secondhand-glory]

This is Uno. He thinks things are gonna be okay. I intend to believe him.

[punmasterkentparson]

This is Kit. He likes chasing bugs, digging in his litter box, and being aggressively cuddly.

[boundtoanandroid]

this is crookshanks she’s orange

[jame7t]

this is Keyes he’s my lead strategist

[lemoneychicken]

this is toast, hes a cool dude

[crazybarks42]

This is Rosie. She’s loud because she’s full of bees

[courfeyracs-swordcane]

This is Sweety he is very large

[dog-dyke]

This is Khensu he belongs to my neighbors he’s half Maine coon I hang out with him when he gets lonely

[cumaeansibyl]

This is little cat, she loves headbutts and standing on people

[sashayed]

this is Elly she’s very soft and a butthole

[hayheyhey-deactivated20201030]

These cats are Mugi and Mio. They both like to interrupt you with their bodies and or loud meows. In Mio’s case: she blep

[lookatallthosereblogs-deactivat]

This is Chell. Her hobbies include sleeping under the covers and drinking out of my water glass.

[patrickat]

This is Kitty. She was a stray kitten who decided to adopt me and she always likes to help pack when I travel.

[ariellymm]

And my hubbies foot. He is also very tired.

[playmobilcha]

[chrismogaku]

MOTHERFUCKERS COULDN’T GET ON WONDER WOMEN’S LEVEL 

[babyanimalgifs]

oh my god that face.

[fapitalism-deactivated20120910]

[raisemysonbootlicker]

This is the money Patrick. Reblog so money will come your way

[gvldenhour]

“I’m getting back in line.”

[sniggadoodles]

OKAY but i just reblogged this last night and guess what i got today from my workplace’s self-audit!

THANK YOU PATRICK FOR FREE MONEY

[musinvenusian]

BLESS ME PATRICK

[lily-d247]

PATRICK I HAVE NEVER STRAYED YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVED YOU

[ghara2]

@billshitposts

[billshitposts-deactivated201608]

*rolls sleeves* aight dude lets get me some money

[merakid-0]

Can i just *Gets in line*…there

[borkdork]

HELP ME PATRICK, I AM IN SERIOUS NEED OF CASH!!!

[guy]

pls

[hancarolyn]

pls pat

[oatsandandrea-deactivated201701]

I need a new start in life.

[ariellymm]

Meh. Might as well

[therealsongbirddiamondback]

IRON FIST IN A NUTSHELL!

SPOILERS CAUSE THIS SERIES MADE ME MAD!

Iron Fist: Hi!  I’m Danny Rand!  I survived a plane crash when I was a kid and now I want my company back.

Me: Oh, looks like you’re a hobo now.

Iron Fist: Yep!  But no worries! If I tell my friends Ward and Joyce that I’m Danny, they’ll believe me!

Me: This would be easier if you just told them stuff you personally knew about them that they didn’t tell anyone else.  You’re wasting a full hour of my time here…

Iron Fist:  MEET MY HOBO FRIEND!

Me: Um…

Iron Fist: NOW HE’S DEAD!

Me: What?!

Iron Fist: OH NO!  Joyce drugged me now I’m in an insane asylum!  CONSTANT FLASHBACKS OF MY PARENTS DYING!

Me: You played these like 3 times now.

Iron Fist: Really?  Well it’s time for me to tell the Doctors at this insane asylum here about it.

Me: Can you please talk about Kun Lun…

Iron Fist: Also, my father’s best friend died and came back to life and now leaves in this penthouse he can’t leave or else the Hand gets mad.  He’s also a dick to his son and obsesses over me with cameras.

Me: That’s…kind of cool, but he’s the obvious villain.

Iron Fist: Also, I found this girl name Colleen Wing who owns a dojo and call her from the asylum.  We seriously connected I approached her talking in Chinese and she’s Asian.

Me: That sounds kind of racist…

Iron Fist: Now that I escaped prison, I’m going to approach Hoggarth to sue my company to get back in business!

Me: Wasn’t she a horrible person in Jessica Jones?

Iron Fist: Never mind that!  Now the case has been dropped cause villain wants me in the company and forced his son to let me be 51% shareholder!

Me: So the legal stuff didn’t matter?

Iron Fist: Matters as much as the fucks I give about this company!  I’m pretty much telling them to do things for the people, close down plants, and I never show up at meetings!

Me: Why did you want to be the head of the company so badly if you don’t give a rats ass about it?!

Iron Fist: Oh!  We need to stop the drugs!  Colleen is helping!  Also Claire is here!

Me: WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!  And why does Claire feel so out of place?!

Iron Fist: Oh, Colleen is also in illegal fight clubs.

Me: That’s kind of cool

Iron Fist: GREAT! Cause it’s only a plot element for 2 episodes!

Me: UGGGGGH!!!

Iron Fist: Now we’re fighting the Hand lead by Madame Gao!

Me: Wait, wasn’t she a competing group against the Hand in Daredevil? Why is she part of the Hand now?  And why isn’t she speaking Chinese? 

Iron Fist: Now we have this Russian chemist who we need to rescue his daughter by going through fighting challenges

Me: That’s actually kind of cool.

Iron Fist: In fact, I beat Bride of Nine Spiders in a 5 minute cameo!

Me: WHAT?!  Bride of Nine Spiders is another Immortal Weapon!  She’s pretty much another defender of Kun Lun and is equal to the Iron Fist!

Iron Fist: VIIIIIIILLLAAAANNNNN!  Anyways, we got Russian guy’s daughter back!

Me: Great.

Iron Fist: But then Russian guy dies.

Me: We don’t see the daughter again.

Iron Fist: You don’t see the daughter again.

Me: Figures.

Iron Fist: OH! I have sex with Colleen!

Me: Didn’t you swear to celibacy an episode ago?

Iron Fist: Now we’re going to China to bust Gao! 

Me: This looks nothing like China.  This looks like a Warehouse in NYC with Chinese signs slapped all over them.

Iron Fist: WOAAAAAH!  Now Claire, Colleen and I are fighting off Hand Ninjas!

Me: How the hell is Claire beating fully trained Hand Ninjas?!

Iron Fist: Now we captured Gao!  But Colleen is poisoned!

Me: I feel like the hero being injured in a Netflix show for an episode is par for the course…

Iron Fist: But have no fear!  Now her sensei appears and tells me to use the Iron Fist to heal her and now we’re going to his compound.

Me: This sensei guy feels like he came out of nowhere.

Iron Fist: OH, he’s a SUPER IMPORTANT CHARACTER!

Me: There’s only 5 episodes left!

Iron Fist:  BTW, Ward is now going insane cause I bail from his business meetings and his dad is forcing him to hide bodies!

Me: Christ, what an asshole-

Iron Fist: And now Ward killed his father

Me: Oh, sort of saw that comi-

Iron Fist: But now his dad is alive again and is wondering the street terrorizing children and sticking his hand in boiling hot dog water.

Me: …okay, I’m laughing my ass off at this stuff and I don’t know if it’s meant to be funny.

Iron Fist: 

Me:

Iron Fist: So yeah, he’s gone off the deepend, and now Ward is CRAAAAZY!

Me: That’s kind of interesting.

Iron Fist: Back to me!  Now I’m in a college campus and Gao is captured!

Me: Hurray!

Iron Fist: But it turns out that this campus is really ran by the Hand!

Me: What?

Iron Fist: And Colleen Wing is part of the Hand too!

Me: WHAT?!

Iron Fist: See, there are separate factions of the Hand, both named the Hand, and the Gao side and Colleen side hate each other.

Me: I need to lie down.

Iron Fist: As I escape, Colleen’s pupil got injured!

Me: Why do I get the feeling he’s going to disappear from the story…

Iron Fist: Now Colleen and I are on bad terms.

Me: Ugh, this is boring.  How is Faramir doing?

Iron Fist: Oh, he just shot the old black guy who was the head of Rand because he booted Joyce, Ward and Danny from the company.

Me: …

Iron Fist: Also, this guy hijacks a Burrito car and makes shurikens

Me: Seems like an asshole.

Iron Fist: Well that asshole is my best friend and now he’s helping me fight the Hand!

Me: YOU HAVE THREE EPISODES LEFT AND YOU INTRODUCE ANOTHER CHARACTER?!

Iron Fist: Yep!  And he’s saying I’m doing a shit job leaving Kun Lun!

Me: YOU ARE!

Iron Fist: Anyways, we now must stop the Colleen side of the Hand leader!

Me: Who I don’t care about.

Iron Fist: Colleen Won, but we won’t kill him.

Me: Why fight with a sword if you don’t kill?!

Iron Fist: Oh, but my best friend killed him.

Me: I feel like that’s his only purpose in this story.

Iron Fist: Now me and my friend are fighting!

Me: Please stop.

Iron Fist: Now I hate my best friend!  Oh, the dead body is gone too.

Me: Of course

Iron Fist: OH NO!  Now Faramir has taken control of the company again!

Me: Is nobody going to question how a dead man took over a company?

Iron Fist: NO TIME FOR THAT!  TIME FOR FIGHTING!

Me: How are you losing to Faramir?!  He’s fighting with a pole and has no Kung Fu skills!  How are you losing so badly to him?!

Iron Fist:  LOOK!  The dragon!

Me: Those are just red eyes…

Iron Fist: Ward shot his father!  Now the day is saved!  Better burn his body.

Me: I feel like Ward is the only character with a solid character arc.

Iron Fist: Which is why Joyce is now conspiring with my best friend and Gao as a future villain!

Me: Why though?

Iron Fist: Now Colleen and I are going to Kun Lun and…OH NO!  Kun Lun was invaded because I was not guarding it as the Iron Fist!

Me: 

Iron Fist: Still, bet you were disappointed to not see Kun Lun.

Me: Honestly, with how much talking you did about it, I was doubting it even appearing.

Iron Fist: So what do you think.

Me: I felt you were leading me somewhere but it turned out to be shit.

Iron Fist: Oh, you don’t like me cause I’m not Asian.

Me: Your whole show could be a multiracial trans rainbow of diversity, and it would still suck.  Give me back my 13 hours.