(jumps down from kitchen countertop) i'm gay

Blue, he/they/any neopronouns | Home of a very sleepy, very gay bastard | Feel free to like, send me shitposts and memes and shit cause I thrive off of the most dumb things

[beepathan]

hey everyone its april fools. but dont worry i dont have anything planned. just going to sit here and...

I LIED !!!! GET PRANKED

POST BELOW ME GET FUCKING WET

[tahthetrickster]

[correlatedcontents]

The night is cool and balmy.

Your SECURITY GNOMES are raising an alarm.

> define 'balmy'

Balmy means "pleasantly warm."

Your stock of DICTIONARIES has decreased to 31.

Your SECURITY GNOMES report BANDIT ARTILLERY!

> observe night

The night is cool and balmy.

Your SECURITY GNOMES have entered COMBAT DELIRIUM.

> resolve temperature discrepancy

You haven't acquired enough THERMOMETERS to notice the discrepancy.

Your SECURITY GNOMES have activated the MEAT THRESHER.

[goldensunset]

you! tumblr user!

[goldensunset]

can you reblog a two-part post in the correct order?

[stylographic-blue-rhapsody]

“who is linkin park?” - one shot KO by my younger coworker

[stylographic-blue-rhapsody]

I am going to unfold all of your clean laundry and leave it in a pile on your bed

[skullhaver]

it's like every step that I take is another mistake to you

[stylographic-blue-rhapsody]

bestie…. it’s taking me one step closer to the edge and I’m about to break

[stylographic-blue-rhapsody]

do. Not

[pointless-achievements]

Achievement Unlocked:

Points of Absurdity

You've Lost your Castle of Glass and now you're just Numb, having Given Up Waiting for the End while you Bleed It Out, From The Inside.

Jeez these song titles are bleak.

[nem23]

[nonepronounwithleftboy]

translation:

panel 1: the triangle machine is acting up

panel 2: im paid 9.11€ per hour with tax so circle it will be and fuck you

[geminisee]

a collection

[elierlick]

This was published weeks ago, yet I haven't seen a single mainstream news source covering this massive scandal. Read the full article here: https://www.erininthemorning.com/p/trans-youth-suicides-covered-up-by

[uglygirlstatus]

babe get out the yaoi dinner settings we’ve got company

[priezpourlui]

[hotcoward]

cyberfrot

[abalidoth]

Two trucks having wrecks

[the-motan]

two trucks having wrecks

[lithish]

(via @lagowings)

[sadomarxist]

[june-egbert-official]

Like to charge and reblog to cast Chinese scientists destroying the Insulin industry

[acepalindrome]

Here’s a link with more details! They got an insulin dependent patient medication free in just 11 weeks using a cell transplant! It’s still very early and needs a lot more testing to see if they can replicate the results, but having success in a human is very promising!

[indridsglasses]

This is,, one of my favorite moments from the MBMBAM tv show

THIS IS JUST A PHONE NUMBER YOU CAN CALL

[bulkhummus]

[helloitsbees]

[cryptotheism]

The fact that the homophobic term the Pope used is like, intercommunity Italian gay slang, adds a whole nother level.

Imagine if the Pope called someone a "passoid." Holy Father who taught you that word.

[eightyonekilograms]

> take off my hoodie in class

> someone behind me says “yeah boymoder get your tits out”

> turn around fast, i’ve got them this time

> it’s the fucking Pope

> mfw

[datanazush]

"Call that nun a brick your holiness"

[maybuds]

Your attention didn’t collapse. It was stolen by Johann Hari

[year-of-the-terf-deactivated202]

let me tell you, i could barely make it through this paragraph, but this shit is important

[starry-stitch]

Another part of the article that really grabbed me:

“At the moment it’s as though we are all having itching powder poured over us all day, and the people pouring the powder are saying: ‘You might want to learn to meditate. Then you wouldn’t scratch so much.’”

[teaboot]

This post is about why you're scrolling past

[bethanythebogwitch]

Some writers: *meticulously plan out every plot point and the tone and meanings before they start writing*

Me:

[tobiasdrake]

This is basically how Dragon Ball was written and it's one of the biggest anime/manga in the history of the medium.

Write in whatever way works for you and don't look back.

[misogynistcatgirl]

I loved when AI art could never be anything but AI art. the dreams of a computer. now it's all boobs and photorealistic women doing bad kink. but I remember you. I miss you. I love you, Secret Horses.

[misogynistcatgirl]

remember what they took from you

[one-time-i-dreamt]

Dolly Parton has come to do a show in my town. We couldn't afford tickets, so me and my mom sold my stepdad so we could go.

It turned out that we sold him to Dolly Parton, she made him sing with her and then she gave him back.

[moo-moohead]

I threw my short, blonde hair into a messy bun before putting on my cowboy boots. I stared at my big blue orbs in the mirror and sighed. I'm nothing like the other step-dads in town. I'm different. I like to mow the grass.

"Stupid man!" I heard my stepdaughter yell, and I quickly hurried down the stairs to see my wife and stepdaughter standing there, arms crossed.

"What's going on?" I asked.

"We need money for concert tickets, so we're selling you." My wife roared.

I felt tears flow down my rosy red cheeks as I held my Horse Monthly magazine to my chest.

"Howdy honey!" Someone's voice drawled from behind me. I turned around

"Dolly Parton!?" I gasped.