please for the love of all that is holy someone explain to me why little girls always want to play in bathrooms, I was once a little girl who played in the bathroom and I still donât understand, what dark pact have we made with the Bathroom Spirits,
have not added to this in ages because school this year is. hm how do you say. Absolutely Fucking Bonkers Batshit Crazy but here, enjoy some gems from room 601, previously room T7, because they moved us from our overflow trailers into one giant mega trailer which was sort of pointless but now we have a bathroom and a hallway and doors that lock so like. Thatâs good
Not me, Iâm a pacifist. I just make sad pathetic little noises while he strikes me and look up at him with my honest big brown eyes. He knows he killed a good man and it punishes him more than any physical harm I could do to him.
any decent man would take u in and nurse u back to health under the patronage of the old gods he once foolishly believed he could bring himself to sacrifice u to
HEARING MY ITALIAN PROFESSOR READ THE FIRST CANTO OUT LOUD IN THE ORIGINAL ITALIAN WAS A FORMATIVE EXPERIENCE FOR ME.
I COULDNT UNDERSTAND A WORD OF WHAT WAS BEING SAID BUT EVERY SINGLE PERSON IN THE ROOM WAS HIT WITH THE SUDDEN AND INTENSE FEELING THAT THE PERSON WHO WROTE THESE WORDS WAS A MASTER OF THEIR LANGUAGE.
IT IS FAIR TO CALL THE DIVINE COMEDY TRANSCENDANT IN ITS BEAUTY.
TRYING TO MAKE THE DIVINE COMEDY RHYME IN ENGLISH WOULD ABSOLUTELY BUTCHER IT
MOST ENGLISH POETRY IS BASED OFF ALLITERATION AND STRESS RHYTHMS BECAUSE ENGLISH IS A FRANKENSTIEN LANGUAGE WITH SO FEW RHYME GROUPS THAT RHYME OFTEN COMES OFF AS AWKWARD AND SING-SONGY
ITS WHY SHAKESPEARE IS SO IMPRESSIVE HE ROUTINELY MANAGED TO BEAT ENGLISH INTO SHAPE LONG ENOUGH TO RHYME FOR TEN WHOLE LINES WHILE MAKING IT SOUND PERFECTLY NATURAL
Sorry for who-posting in the year 2019 but the Doctor is actually so named because he wrote and successfully defended a dissertation at an accredited university whereas the Master completed a 2-year graduate program in his chosen field, which points to the existence of a third less-advanced and less-specialized counterpart, the Bachelor
I fucking hate this website because not only did I click this goddamn link expecting it to be a joke of some sort, but it wasnât a joke and I sat here spinning the screen around enjoying myself in a stupid bag of cornflakes like the dumbass monkey I am on Tumblr.com, enthralled by being in a bag of corn flakes in
You have no idea how much I want this mass migration to tumblr to be real. I would love it if there was an entire ecosystem on tumblr of tiktokers who don't know or don't want to reblog anything, so they are functionally incapable of interacting with the rest of this website. Nothing is funnier to me
"I understand. You found paradise on TikTok. You had a good fyp, you made good content. The censors protected you and they were friendly for advertisers. So you didn't need a friend like me. Now you come and say "Tumblr, give me content." But you don't ask with respect. You don't offer reblogs. You don't even think to call me "Hellsite." You come into my house on the day my blorbo is to be married and you ask me to do content - for likes."
"(10)" means there are ten stitches at the end of the row
*sc, dc* 6 means repeat the pattern inside the *asterisks* 6 times
slip stitches and chains don't count as stitches
Pieces (in order):
- Belly patch
- Arm (2)
- Leg (2; left and right)
- Tail
- Body
- Muzzle
- Facial marking (2)
- Ear (2)
- Head
.
.
BELLY PATCH
Start: Using brown yarn, ch 8
1. dc into the 3rd chain from the hook, dc 4, 6 dc into the last stitch, turn it upside down and dc into the bottom of the next 4 stitches, dc 5 into the last stitch, sl to join (20)
2. ch 2, 2 dc, dc 4, 2 dc 6, dc 4, 2 dc 5, sl to join (32)
3. ch 2, 2 dc, dc 5, *2 dc, dc* 6, dc 4, *2 dc, dc* 5, sl to join (44)
Bind off, leave a 8+ inch tail for sewing onto the body.
.
.
ARM (2x)
Start: Using brown yarn, create a slip stitch so that the tail end of the yarn is what you pull to adjust the size. You will work into this loop like it is a magic circle.
1. ch 1, sc 6, sl to join, pull tail of the yarn tight (6)
Bind off, sew the hole shut, leave a 6+ inch tail for sewing onto the body.
.
.
LEG (2x)
Start: Using brown yarn, create a slip stitch so that the tail end of the yarn is what you pull to adjust the size. You will work into this loop like it is a magic circle.
1. ch 1, sc 6, sl to join, pull tail of the yarn tight (6)
After row 15, the pattern for the two legs will differ.
LEFT LEG:
16. ch 1, sc 8, turn (8)
17-18. turn, ch 1, sc 8 (8)
19. ch 1, sc 6, dcr, turn (7)
20-21. ch 1, sc 7, turn (7)
RIGHT LEG:
16-18. turn, ch 1, sc 8 (8)
19. ch 1, sc 6, dcr, turn (7)
20-21. ch 1, sc 7, turn (7)
Bind off, leave a 6+ inch tail for sewing onto the body.
.
.
TAIL
Start: Using brown yarn, create a slip stitch so that the tail end of the yarn is what you pull to adjust the size. You will work into this loop like it is a magic circle.
1. ch 1, sc 4, sl to join, pull tail of the yarn tight (4)
2. ch 1, incr 6, sl to join (8)
If the piece is tight, you can pinch the tip so that it folds
Bind off, sew the hole shut, leave a 6+ inch tail for sewing onto the body.
.
.
BODY
Start: Using orange yarn, create a slip stitch so that the tail end of the yarn is what you pull to adjust the size. You will work into this loop like it is a magic circle.
1. ch 1, sc 6, sl to join, pull tail of the yarn tight (6)
Bind off and leave a 6+ inch tail for sewing onto the face. Either pop in a safety nose or use your yarn needle and some brown yarn to sew one in, like in the photo.
.
.
FACIAL MARKINGS (2x)
Start: Using white yarn, ch 7
1. start in the 2nd chain from the hook, sc 2, inc 2, sc 2
2. turn, ch, inc, sc 2, inc 2, sc 2, inc
Bind off and leave a 6+ inch tail for sewing onto the face.
.
.
EAR (2X)
Start: Using brown yarn, ch 11
1. start in the 3rd chain from the hook, sc 9, add a stitch marker, turn (9)
2. ch, skip the first stitch, sc 8, turn (8)
3. ch, skip the first stitch, sc 7, turn (7)
4. ch, skip the first stitch, sc 6, turn (6)
5. ch, skip the first stitch, sc 5, turn (5)
6. ch, skip the first stitch, sc 4, turn (4)
7. ch, skip the first stitch, sc 3, turn (3)
Bind off brown yarn, weave in the end. Using white yarn, ch 1 where your stitch marker was placed
8. starting in the stitch you anchored to, sc 7, incr, sc, incr, sc 7 (19)
Bind off and leave a 6+ inch tail for sewing on later.
.
.
HEAD
Start: Using orange yarn, create a slip stitch so that the tail end of the yarn is what you pull to adjust the size. You will work into this loop like it is a magic circle.
1. ch 1, sc 6, sl to join, pull tail of the yarn tight (6)
I canât draw very well and hated that I couldnât draw my DnD character, a tabaxi cleric named Merry Thing, but then I remembered Iâm pretty good with a needle and thread so I made her
All made by hand, hand embroidered details, and I even crocheted the lace trim on her shift!
Update: I made Thingâs twin brother, Cheeky Night! Cheeky is my favorite npc in the campaign and I couldnât have a Thing without him. Heâs an absolute bastard of a man but I love him so much. The belt heâs wearing I wove by hand with embroidery floss, and the designs on his vest are symbolic to the campaign and his character.
Anyway I love him, I love my tabaxi twins, and I never want to use metallic embroidery floss ever again.
These guys have been getting notes again so I thought Iâd mention that they got me a full time job at my favorite locally owned fabric and yarn store.
you can do this with basically every cartoon animal and some real animals as well. I'm picturing fucking otters and like. snoopy and shit but garfield was the perfect prototype
[I.D. Two drawings of Garfield. The first is sitting down like a normal cat, as he used to be portrayed in the comics. The second, he is standing on two legs like a human and points to himself with a red glint in his eye. Text above and below reads âBecome Bipedal.â End I.D.]
I was messing around to make some icons for my phone, and fell in love with this. Unfortunately it didnât make the final cut for my phone. But I wanted to show it off!
I need a fic where Sam is kidnapped for ransom because of her wealthy family but for some reason this 'pampered little rich girl' seems to give absolutely zero fucks and has way more snark than any human has any right to have when tied to a chair in a dingy basement
Same guys picked up Danny the week before and returned in after two days because man that child is mean. Danny sat there for 48 hours insulting everything from their names to their wardrobe, complained about an evil fruitloop, was attacked several times by ghosts, and somehow kept managing to get out of his binds when he was thirsty, hungry or needed to use the bathroom.
As soon as they hear Sam mention Danny they start to understand that kidnapping kids from Amity is a futile endeavour, they're all weird little escape artists with zero sense of danger. They find Sam sorting through their recycling, seperating paper and plastic, with Danny sitting on the bench chatting about something and they lose it, like KID WE SENT YOU HOME.
Danny's just like, "Yeah but Sam invited me back. I was thinking Mac & Cheese for dinner."
One of the kidnappers come home with good news about the ransom only to find the other one listening intently to Sam talk about the importance of protecting all pollinators, not just bees. And Danny's still there, eating the celebratory Hot Cheetos!
Okay but Danny and Tucker showing up like, "Hey Sam, hate to break it to ya but this place is a total downgrade than your usual place. No bowling alley, no theater, ugggg."
Sam sits there tied up, just, "Ehhh, but no morning people, room of total darkness, they don't complain about me not wearing pink AND they let me recycle. I'm tellin' ya, it ain't the fanciest, but definitely an upgrade."
The kidnappers just stand there like, "Look I don't know if we should be concerned that you prefer us over your folks, but the Fenton kid has to go. We don't want him here!"
Danny just deadpans like, "Well they like me just as much as your parents, so I vote downgrade."
If I may add/expand on a few points:
Danny as a hostage
There's a good chance that an embarrassing amount of time passes before he realizes he's in plain old human restraints that he can phase out of
Unties himself to eat/drink/go to the restroom AND ties himself back up after. Not because he's worried about getting caught, and definitely not because polite or considerate. It's just such a flex
Proceeds to complain that the ropes are too tight when he was the one that just tied them
Kinda loves the excuse to not be in school and catch up on some sleep
Goes ghost when no one is looking, then says (as Phantom): "Danny needed to run home and grab his homework. He asked me to fill in in the meantime. Hope that's cool"
"Hey, you know who'd be a much more dramatic and valuable hostage? Vlad Masters. You should kidnap him next. I'll help you!"
When the kidnappers try to ignore all his bullshit, he starts narrating everything they do. Like a very memeable nature documentary, or those Thomas Sanders vines
If the kidnappers torture him, his reaction is something like this
Sam as a hostage
Complains that the hideout is not sufficiently creepy. Needs more flickering lights, leaky pipes, etc. 2/10.
Plays mental games with the kidnappers. Mostly instigates in-fighting over the pettiest possible subjects.
Sam: None of you seem to understand. Iâm not locked in here with you. Youâre locked in here with me.
Kidnapper: That Fenton kid already used that line on us right before he leaned too far back in his chair and tipped over
Whenever her rescue party comes there's a 50% chance she's doing a tarot reading for someone.
If it's a situation where a) Danny hasn't been there already so he doesn't show up on his own and b) Sam exhausts all self-rescue ideas, she manages to break free and throw some kind of summoning spell together. She spends the time between finishing the spell and Danny's arrival humming My Boyfriend's Back (at half speed and off-key for maximum creepy effect)
You know what, she's not waiting for rescuing so much as a lift home. "Help" arrives and sees Sam is free and the crew of kidnappers is tied to chairs
Yeah she could've made more of an effort to find keys to the vehicles on site or a phone, but when Danny arrives Sam has an extra person to point and laugh at them.
Tucker as a hostage
"Getting kidnapped isn't ideal but it's nice to be invited to things"
Gets offended if his ransom isn't very high
Complains about not having his phone/PDA non-stop until the kidnappers relent just to get him to shut up
Once he has his gadget(s) back he's perfectly behaved (unless they try to feed him vegetables). They figure he's just playing games because there's no internet or cell service where they're keeping him. He is in fact playing games, but little do they know it took him all of two minutes to get around the "no service" issue and send out an alert to Danny and Sam with his exact coordinates. He's playing games to kill time until they get there.
If the kidnappers are foolish enough to get their ransom electronically, Tucker figures out a way to have it redirect to his own bank account
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