[villageidiotwitch]

i kinda just want to live in the woods and give mysterious prophecies to travelers for a while

[asterosian]

Burger King will give you a whopper for one cent if you go within 600 feet of a McDonald’s and order one from their app

First of all, power move

Second, this means any poor person with a phone and the new Burger King app can literally get food for a penny just by going to McDonalds, which is probably a goddamn lifesaver if you’re regularly worried about where your next meal is coming from

This lasts until December 12, 2018

So, yeah. Save some cash and stay fed.

[mementomoriiv]

[randomitemdrop]

Item: inflatable pink cathedral

[tetraterezi]

Thats the Pussy Church, Babe

[tamamita]

This Kirby will protect your posts from being flagged

[gingerlovesio]

I’m waiting for this to get flagged honestly

[tamamita]

Bold of you to assume Kirby will be flagged

[fluffballchikorita]

He looks like a boobie

[tamamita]

STOP SAYING THE NAUGHTY WORD

[yzghuldar]

Your powers cannot stop The Purge. Watch this:

Nipples.

[tamamita]

You fools have been trying your very best to make this post flagged, but you all underestimate Kirby

[tamamita]

30000 notes and you all still thought Kirby would get flagged, but Kirby is stronger than that

[just-shower-thoughts]

people who often say sorry even when it’s not their fault or it’s not in their control probably do it because when they were younger they were often blamed for things that weren’t their fault or weren’t in their control

[gaypeopletwitter]

[firesigh-deactivated20181118]

sometimes? i just be holding my titty

[skarchomp]

the Komodo Dragon is the biggest, strongest, most dangerous apex predator that is physically incapable of looking at all threatening

[skarchomp]

i could conceivably be torn to pieces and eaten alive by these things and my last words would be “lmao” 

[skarchomp]

me on my way to bring down an elk twice my size using deadly bacteria that grows on my fangs

[marauders4evr]

Abled Person: Hey man, can you hold this wad of $2,000 and this one penny for me while I open my wallet?

Disabled Person: YOU COMPLETE AND UTTER FOOL!

The United States Government:

(Watch how many people don’t get this.)

[marauders4evr]

#raises hand #i dont understand #please explain? 

In order for disabled people to receive any sort of financial assistant for their housing, food, bills, medical supplies, etc., they cannot ever have more than $2,000 of resources to their name. Ever.

It doesn’t matter what it’s for.

You’re saving up for a new wheelchair?

For college?

To put a downpayment on a house?

Hell man, you just happen to budget for once in your life so that you can have some extra money in case something bad happens?

Your benefits immediately get cut off if you’re a cent over $2,000.

And, even worse, you usually end up having to pay back every dollar the government gave you that month.

So say you get $400. If they find out you’re twenty dollars over the resource limit, you have to give them all $400 back and you undergo an investigation of your funds to see if you will continue getting money.

“What if I spend the money that day?”

Doesn’t matter. In fact, from what I can tell, people who do this are actually put under investigation for fraud.

And yes, this system literally kills people.

[locuas642]

Remember when “Guardians of the Galaxy” came out? one of Rocket Racoon’s creators, Bill Mantlo, suffered an accident in 1992 and has irreparable brain damage.

before the movie came out, Marvel gave him an exclusive preview screening. SOme people were upset because they felt if Marvel was really wanted to thank mantlo, they should have donated money to Mantlo’s family.

Bill Mantlo’s brother had to come out and explain: If Marvel gave them monetary aid, Bill Mantlo would lose his financial assistance.

[rootbeergoddess]

That’s so utterly depressing.

[sushinfood]

disgusting

[beeskeepony]

I have friends on welfare who won’t pick up a penny in the street because they’d risk the welfare they struggled to get for 10 years.

[raenboow]

oh look another fucked up thing in this world. let’s just add it to the list. number 63858b

[luvtonique]

My brother has been on California State SSI for autism for the last 10 years, and he absolutely has to (no joke, HAS TO) spend all 720 bucks of his SSI every month, because if he puts it in the bank he risks losing his SSI altogether.

Sometimes, at the end of the month, he has no idea what to do with his money because the whole month went by and he still has 400-ish bucks in his account, and he fucking panics because he doesn’t want to get anywhere near 2,000.

And here’s the funnest part of the story!

One day he did a huge commission on Second Life and wound up earning 1500 bucks off of it, and he told the guy to donate it 500 bucks at a time over 3 months. The guy didn’t want to, and just donated all 1500, which put my brother at 2,036 bucks.

The state IMMEDIATELY (I’m talking less than an hour) called him up to tell him over the phone that they were canceling his SSI, because they noticed he had gone over the 2,000 buck threshold. He had to tell them that someone had made a charitable donation to him and that this was not a common occurrence in any way shape or form, and upon not believing him, my mother had to call to talk to them as his legal caretaker and say basically the same thing until they called off the cancellation of his SSI money.

He also had to cancel his renter’s assistance because it put him to 1,062 a month, so if he went 30 days without spending any money they’d cancel his SSI altogether. Like, none of us in the family have any fucking clue why that regulation is in place and it’s the stupidest shit in human history.

Please, legal side of Tumblr, tell me what positive reasoning this law has?

[euryale-dreams-deactivated20201]

It’s not just money, though. Things you own can count against your resource limit as well provided that they’re not exempt and provided that they’re worth money.

Also, the rules about what is and is not exempt from being counted against your resource limit are incredibly vague and deliberately open to interpretation. Even things that are normally exempted like clothing or furniture could be deemed non-exempt if a capricious bureaucrat decides that it’s actually worth too much money and thus counts as an ‘investment.’

As someone who receives SSI this causes me a huge amount of stress.

[twodotsknowwhy]

This is so unbelievably fucked up

[prudencepaccard]

don’t couples have to divorce sometimes because their combined income disqualifies them from assistance?

[ranma-official]

Conservatives: be more frugal and save money instead of asking to get paid more

Also conservatives: if you save money you’re a sneaky thief and a fraud

[no-mi-torta]

not to mention if you can manage to get a part time job or something ssi wants like half of what you make. thats what the experience in arizona is about anyway

[ladylazarus33-deactivated202103]

Straight girls: I am bi but I’m not attracted to women and the thought of going down on a woman is disgusting to me

Me: lmao you’re straight and calling yourself bi is a huge insult to women who actually experience homophobia for being attracted to women

Straight girls: hmm this is literally SO problematic haha I grew up on tumblr and internalized the whole “straight ppl are boring lol” jokes that gay people make so now we are gentrifying the lgbt community move over queer identified folx

[positiveautistic-deactivated202]

[ripe]

hi yes you requested one rowdy boy?

🐢| ig: aquamike23

[relatable-autism-memes]

source: kittenautie on IG

[thelookingglassalice]

[rhube]

BABIES!!!

[roachpatrol]

so the best thing about this is that bobcats, like just about every feline besides lions and domestic cats, are pretty solitary. they don’t really have friends. they aren’t really equipped to make friends. 

domestic cats, on the other hand, do know how to make friends. they are friendly to the point that lots of feral cats live in colonies— the females hang out together, even raise kids together, and the males like to spend nonsexual time with their baby mommas. they groom each other, play around, and have a particular tail position to signal to one another— straight up with the tip curled— that they’re friendly and happy to see each other. cats learned how to be chill with each other in order to take full advantage of human food sources: an ancient granary supplies enough rats for a lot of cats, as does a modern lady with a big bag of frisky bits, so it would be a waste of time and energy for any one cat to try and stake the entire foodsource out for exclusive use. less fighting means more eating and resting which means a longer, nicer life and a lot more kittens. 

so this stray cat, she obviously has no colony if she’s wandering around and sneaking into zoo enclosures, so she’s like ‘hey! there’s food here! what up, other cat, let’s be friends, let’s be friends and share that food’. and the bobcat is like ‘??????’ because actually wild cats are pretty cautious about initiating hostilities and anything new and aggressive makes them very worried. and the domestic cat is like ‘haha cool, ok, we’re friends now, big guy. no problems.’ and the bobcat is like ‘????? well…?? ok?’ and then they are friends. 

the super interesting thing about most wild cat species is they don’t really have the capacity to make friends on their own, especially outside of sibling bonds, but, if someone comes along and does all the friend-making themselves, they’ll totally roll with it. zoo cats can get really attached to their caregivers— or, in this case, a very confident little calico demonstrating exactly why her species has been so darn successful over the last nine thousand years . 

so anyway that is the best thing: bobcats are not equipped to make friends, but luckily for this bobcat this homeless lady did not give any shits and made friends anyway. and now they are both happy. 

[reaj3asa]

#THE FACT THAT THE KEY TO DOMESTIC CAT’S SUCCESS IS THAT THEY LEARNED  #THE MEANING OF FRIENDSHIP #IS A FUCKING HOOT

[fozmeadows]

I will never be over the floofpaws of the bobcat attempting loafstance in that first picture

[star-anise]

OH MY GOOOOOOOD

LOOK

A VIDEO OF THEM GROOMING AND HEADBUTTING EACH OTHER!!!

[comtessevoncorbuleac]

DIS IS FREND. IS GUD BIG FREND.

[d20-darling-deactivated20181011]

@rose-tinted-wings

[catlogicdefiesall]

💕💕💕💕💕💕

[kittiesatemypronouns]

Ohhhhhh….!💜💜💜

[siegfriedandroy]

im crying

[hmsindecision]

Do you know how many dogs I’ve met that get scared or anxious around men because in their previous home men hit them? A lot, and they are very protective of the women who have adopted them now.

Men who are violent towards women are often violent towards animals as well. They think we’re all chattel. If a man wants you to choose between your dog or cat or him, dump the guy. Those animals will love you for the rest of your life, loyal and true.

[corpsefluid]

Actually, I have something to add.

The other day I saw a story where a woman was asking why her dogs had suddenly started growling at her boyfriend whenever he was in the same room as her son.

And my immediate thought was ‘that boyfriend has hurt the kid somehow.’

Spoilers: that was exactly the case.

Trust ur dogs when they say something is off.

[katnissdoesnotfollowback]

The first time my sister came to visit, via plane, after I got my dog, pupper growled at her and wouldn’t go near her for the first day. Next visit was by car (two day drive)and pupper LOVED my sister. They snuggled and played and none of us could figure out why the change. We thought maybe the scent of my sisters cat had lingered on her clothes, making that first visit a rough one. Whereas when she came by car, the scent had had time to wear off. Well that was partially true…

Fast forward about six months when I went north to visit my family. My sister walked into my parents’ house and pupper ran to greet my sister. Stopped dead in her tracks and started growling and barking. Hackles raised, full protection mode. My sisters husband had just walked in behind her.

My precious puppy wanted NOTHING to do with him. She barked, growled, ran away, and sat between him and my sister. Y'all my dog had spent maybe a weekend a half around my sister but protected her like this was her flesh and blood.

Eventually, my sister filed for divorce on grounds of “Extreme and repeated mental, emotional, and sexual abuse.” Divorce was final in less than a month because her claims were substantiated.

Trust the dog, honey. They KNOW.

[catscatsholyshitcats]

I’ve never owned dogs, but I used to work with horses (which are a lot like big dogs).

There was this one horse I worked with named Tonto. He was a doll. He followed me like a puppy, snuck treats out of my pocket, he was the sweetest thing. We were practically inseparable.

A guy I was considering dating came to visit me one day, and Tonto wanted NOTHING to do with him. Normally well behaved, he shoved himself between us and would NOT let this guy near me. He was stomping, acting really aggressive, and tried to bite the guy. This horse was practically dragging me back toward the barn. At that moment, despite being like, 17, I knew something was up, and ultimately things didn’t pan out for guy and me.

A year later I found out he had lied about his age (he said he was 18 but he was actually 27) he was arrested for sexually assaulting an 11 year old girl.

TRUST THE ANIMALS.

[cryptodyke]

If an animal or child is weary of someone, trust the animal or child, they can sense it.

[helperhoopoe]

when you exhale, plants grow. you shouldn’t be sorry for that.

[slimegargoyle]

are you trying to be normal so people won’t know you’re traumatized and angry or are you trying to be larger-than-life so people won’t know you’re vulnerable and needy