Kallanda Lee's Shangri-La

Kallanda Lee is the pen name of a girl who goes by many names, who has often led a life that was stranger than fiction and who made fiction her life. This is just a place for fandom stuff I like to geek out and squee over. I'm a multishipper, currently into most things Marvelverse, Assassin's Creed, Dragon Age, Game of Thrones, Doctor Who, The Blacklist. Oh, and I like musicals. Blog may contain spoilers. Blog WILL contain mature content. I totally suck at using tumblr interface, but feel free to say hi.

[glumshoe]

I’ll never understand why anthropomorphic animal cartoons like Robin Hood and Zootopia will go to the trouble of creating character designs that are meant to be understood as “attractive” or even “sexy” to the human audience but explicitly avoid showing interspecies romances between anthropomorphic animals. Why is THAT weird but, like, trying to make rabbits recognizably sexy-coded to humans isn’t?

[glumshoe]

Sometimes, sure, but why was Maid Marian a fox in Robin Hood? There wasn’t anything particularly “foxlike” about her personality, and it would make more sense for her to be a lion. They made her a fox only because Robin was a fox and making her something else would be “weird”, but I don’t think the wolf cop or the chicken maid or the lion prince were actually meant to represent race.

[countesspetofi]

The best inter species couple is Kermit and Miss Piggy as the Cratchits in A Muppet Christmas Carol, because all their sons are frogs and all their daughters are pigs, as God clearly intended.

[glumshoe]

there are only two genders: frog and pig

[forestdwellingrat]

I’ve pointed out to my friends that the fact that Kermit and Miss Piggy’s kids are like that means either

1) they reproduce asexually and the children are clones of each parent OR

2) Kermit and Miss Piggy are members of the same sexually dimorphic species, hence the split between their male and female children

yes I have spent too long running about potential muppet biology

[glumshoe]

oh god

[sailor-lady]

Third option, when they want kids they get some fabric and make one, and hope a Hand inhabits it

[glumshoe]

Do you think there’s a ritual for inviting An Inhabiting Hand to possess the empty husk of your muppet baby?

[jenivi]

[aflowerthatbloomsinadversity]

Just wanted to show u guys that in Muppets Most Wanted, Piggy fantasizes about her and Kermit having babies and this is what they look like

So do with that what you will

[fremedon]

Recall that in The Great Muppet Caper, Kermit and Fozzie are brothers. And this was their dad (right):

[capitalism-and-analytics]

Thank you for specifying, which one of the two individuals in the picture was the dad haha

[la-pou-belle]

I, for one, think Shrek handled interspecies coupling the best. By this I am of course talking about the Dronkeys.

[kestrelsparverius]

[adrnired]

In season 3 of BoJack Horseman, we learn Diane (middle) has been impregnated by Mr. Peanutbutter (left). The fetuses are confirmed to be puppies.

[autisticexpression]

This is the worst addition to this post

[araku-validrava]

I am reminded of Treasure Planet.

In which Captain Amelia (left), an extra terrestrial anthropomorphic cat, had hybrid babies with Doctor Doppler (middle), an extra terrestrial anthropomorphic dog, whom also gave birth to the babies

[wizardlizardinhislair]

I always thought that in muppet movies like muppet Christmas Carol the characters are played by the muppets (so kermit is acting and playing the role of Bob rather than being him) so the kids in that film would just be other acting muppets right?

Or is that just something my brain made up?

[ridiculouslyphotogenicsinosauru]

[kingscrown666]

Last time I saw this post (YESTERDAY) it stopped at the second Eggman

[the-haiku-bot]

Last time I saw this

post (YESTERDAY) it stopped at

the second Eggman

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[astronomical-bagel]

anyone in this thread smoke weed

[susiron]

In Leo the Lion (2005) a lion and elephant have the most cursed hybrid children and I think yall should see them

(also Matt Mercer voices the villain, Maximus Elefante and I think that’s very important)

[spaceinvaydr]

[headspace-hotel]

I think that what they are talking about is perfectly clear.

[hiveswap]

Amogus

[hellsitegenetics]

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Closest match: Clivina fossor genome assembly, chromosome: 13 Common name: Digger Slope-rumped Beetle

[nudityandnerdery]

[hekuuu]

[popepauljohn]

[yeahiwasintheshit]

Lol

[superiortrash]

[the-official-ceo]

I don't care if they're the highest grossing movies on planet freakin Earth, you say "Avatar" and everyone and their mom still thinks that bald little bitch and his magic cow. Soggy James can keep his millions, he'll never have the streets.

[pup-purgatory]

[marz-genesis]

bang bang

[kallanda-lee]

50000 likes!

[paparaxote]

the odyssey of recollection

[petewentzisblack1312]

we seriously need to stop conceding to the personhood trap when it comes to abortion rights. is a fetus a person? thats a spiritual question. i dont care about the answer. should another person dictate what someone can do with their body? simple answer: no.

[petewentzisblack1312]

like if a fetus isnt a person it has no right to my body and if a fetus IS a peson it also has no right to my body because there is no other context in which we are required to put ourselves at risk of physical harm to preserve another persons safety or even life.

you dont have to save someone from drowning even if youre a strong swimmer. even in death youre not required to donate organs and that could save several people. you can kill someone if you truly believe your safety is at risk. we dont mandate preservation of life over autonomy in any of these circumstances.

[harrystyles420]

the first smut i ever read was about a girl listening to these people having sex in a bathroom stall and when they were done she snuck in and it was like “she saw semen all over the floor and bent over to pick one up”

she picked up a sperm

just one

[plain-flavoured-english]

a seman, if you will

[lilboreddev-blog]

reblog if your name isn't Amanda.

[thatblackwatchdouche-blog-blog]

2,121,566 people are not Amanda and counting!

We’ll find you Amanda.

[world-heritage-posts]

world heritage post

[wheezecheese]

I HAVE to reblog this eleven million note post. That’s the most notes I’ve ever seen on tumblr. Also my name is Jade, not Amanda.

[zsnes]

Melanie Martinez wishes she was Grimes. Grimes wishes she was Bjork. Bjork wishes she was 2 inches tall so she could go inside the computer and have a big adventure

[bakedbakermom]

saying ao3 needs to censor certain content is like saying a museum can't have still life art that includes strawberries because you don't like them.

these are not real strawberries. you do not have to, and in fact cannot, eat them. no one with a strawberry allergy will be harmed by looking at them. no migrant workers were exploited in the picking of these strawberries. there were no questionable farming practices or negative environmental impacts from growing or transporting them.

because - and i cannot stress this enough - they are not real strawberries.

if you don't like strawberries, you don't have to look at the paintings. in fact, you can get a map of the museum that lists what works are in what rooms and just. not go in there. if you see one by mistake, you can look away. just keep walking. there's plenty of other stuff to see.

yes, real strawberries can cause real quantifiable harm to real people.

but again. these are not real strawberries.

you may have whatever feelings you like about strawberries, and so can i. you can draw and write about whatever fruit floats your boat, and so can i, even if that happens to be strawberries. and we can hang our art side by side in the same gallery, provided you understand that my strawberries are not about you (and your kumquats are, shocker, not about me) and that - and this is true - neither are real.

and when the fascists break down the doors and grab all the strawberry paintings and heap them in the street and set them on fire, please know that they are coming for your kumquats next.

so if you want a place where you can show off your beautiful kumquat art safely, you're gonna have to tolerate having some strawberries in the next room.

and that's okay. because the strawberries aren't real.

[k-wame]

[cricketcat9]

As a 76 y/o with two marriages and a good number of relationships behind me, I had a good and very approving laugh.

[kosmogrl]

[manwhorewednesdays]

This is actually such a crucial part of healing from neglect and abuse and I have to add to this.

Because indeed, people who like you will not roll their eyes and sigh at the idea of accommodating your needs, they will value your voice and be upset with you about injustice done to you, not at you for "being difficult". They will be happy when you find a way to live a better life, and help you to get there. If you are struggling, someone who loves you wants to see you smile, not tell you to smile because "you have it so good".

[fridayindulges]

[adaswordlace]

https://twitter.com/CriminelleLaw/status/1037511306906099712

Reminds me of my mom getting remarried several years ago, for about a weekend - dude waited until after the wedding to tell her he expected her at waiting at home with dinner waiting when he finished work.

I dunno, like I get that this version of manhood is “normal” but goddamn is it the most brittle, contemptable fuckin thing

[unified-multiversal-theory]

This is NOT these women’s fault in any way - these men hide their misogyny until they think you’re hooked. They know what they are doing.

[kittiesatemypronouns]

These women are wise and brave. I admire them so much!

[geekandmisandry]

Not even touching the fact that he thinks teachers and nurses are lesser…he wants her to be less so that he can be more.

[imnottechsupport]

Am i the only one that thinks they could have come back from this? Like please tell me this was just the straw that broke the camels back and not a one off event. He must be an at least somewhat respectable person if she managed to stay with him up til that point. Him feeling lesser is a taught facet of his life pushed upon him by the patriarchy. It obviously damaged the way he viewed his gf, and his relationship, but that doesnt mean it cant be untaught. And of course its not this womans responsibility to be his teacher, but i hope she at least made him aware that this is what happened and why she left…

[geekandmisandry]

Literally how can you come back from someone wanting to have more power over you?

He’s not a little kid, he’s a grown ass man and if he hasn’t learned that 1. Teachers and nurses are smart as fuck and 2. That women aren’t and shouldn’t be lesser to him then when the hell is he going to learn from that?

Why does it need to be a final straw? Signs that someone is this fucked up are logs, not straws. And being a “respectable” person is easy when you’re lying about who you are and what you think.

[dragonsrequiem]

These guys waited until they thought their women couldn’t possibly exist without them and then tried to shut down the things that made them special. Being nurses. Public defenders. Teachers.

These men pointed out what they were so proud of… how hard they worked… and tried suggesting that they stop. Tried making them feel bad about it. This is a common pathway into emotional and psychological abuse.

It was designed to make them feel bad and give it up. The next step would have been “what else can I take away”. Those situations where the woman’s confidence is shattered and it takes her years to get free of the asshole… 9/10 started with comments like this.

Please understand that this wasn’t an off the cuff thing. This was something he’s been thinking for a while, but waited to say til he thought he could make her change to suit him.

[crossbowsandunicorns]

This is so important. These are not normal or innocuous comments these are red flags and classic behavior of abusers. People like this are insanely manipulative. They hook you in and pick you apart piece by piece. It starts with this, moves on to isolating you from your support system, and then flashforward a few years and you’re convinced that you’ll never be good enough and you need them to survive. You end up broken and completely subservient. These women did the right thing and are brave for speaking. Abusers aren’t usually the neighbors you hear screaming and shattering dishes like you see in the movies. They’re your “friendly next door neighbors” and they keep quiet. People are too scared to talk. Again, why her speaking up is so important.

[porcupine-girl]

THIS STUFF ALL OF THIS.

People wonder how anyone stays with an abuser - this is how. Because manipulative people don’t hit you or insult you on the first date. They wait until you’re invested in them and the relationship, and then they start small, with comments like this.

And they rely on the fact that so many people’s reaction will be “okay, that sucked, but we can come back from this.” They bank on their victim thinking that way. They might even apologize and claim they won’t do it again. But they always do, and they escalate slowly, so you’re a frog in a pot of hot water.

Don’t wait for the tenth red flag, because by then you’ll be starting to think that hey, that’s actually kind of a nice shade of red, so maybe it’s not so bad to have all these red flags around, maybe if I just decorated with them they’d be okay.

[foxy-voxy]

Also, women are not rehabilitation centers for poorly behaved men.

[musashi]

Ladies, this is how you do it.

[swimmingblue]

And dudes absolutely start this shit slow. They gradually sprinkle it in, and slowly ramp it up, increasing the temperature of the water until the women are like the frogs, mostly unaware that they’re swimming in boiling water.

And when they do ramp it up to a new level, it’s often with something like this - when a woman’s committed to a new level on the relationship, like moving in together or deciding to be exclusive. They’re pushing the envelope now that the woman’s more invested.

And this woman did the right thing by moving out asap. Maybe she could salvage the relationship, but getting out is the first priority.

[inqorporeal]

I could tell you all about what a lovely, affectionate, A+ boyfriend my asshole ex was – how he loved how strong and independent I am – right up until I moved in witn him, and then he set about trying to systematically tear me to pieces. Lying about everything from how he wasn’t allowed to make a spare key for me to what people at work were supposedly saying behind my back, isolating me from potential friends and then trying to make me doubt reality. Putting my clothes through a hot wash so they shrank. Berating me for taking a sick day. Never mind the cheating; I’m more offended he thought I was so stupid I wouldn’t notice, than that he did it, because by that point I was well out of fucks.

Why did I stay, if I knew within two months that he was a piece of shit? Simple: I wasn’t being paid enough to leave, and all the people I could have asked for help also knew him, possibly better than they knew me; when I reached out cautiously for support, most of them said it was in my head, or some bullshit about cultural differences that I knew was false. I didn’t feel safe and had nobody to lean on.

If your partner throws up a red flag once they get you dependent, don’t wait until it’s an alarm siren. Get out.

[audacityinblack]

This is why you need to always HAVE an out. A friend or family member whose contact info isn’t in your phone. A bank account or debit card he’s not aware of. A place you can go to get away from him safely, even if it’s for a day or two while you plan your next moves.