Hi, my lovely little darlin's! Welcome and thanks for stopping by my currently Elvis-obsessed blog. 💗 Here you'll find the links to my Elvis Presley fic masterlists. I so hope you enjoy!
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Read the entirety of Pink Scarf 💗🧣💗 HERE! (18+ only)
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Requests/One-shots (EP/Austin):
Snap (Post Army!Elvis 18+)
When Tears Are In Your Eyes (Austin Butler 18+)
Sergeant Presley (Army!Elvis 18+)
How Sweet The Sound (70s Elvis)
Sweet Symphony ('68 Elvis 18+)
Need Your Love Tonight ('61 Elvis 18+)
Paisley Dreams Part 1 ('70 Elvis 18+)
Velvet Sky Part 1 ('73 Elvis)
Trick or Treat ('74 Elvis 18+)
Paisley Dreams Part 2 ('70 Elvis 18+)
Velvet Sky Part 2 ('73 Elvis)
⚠️ This blog & my fics contain mature themes. 18+ MDNI
Prompt: You are part of Elvis Presley's coveted inner circle, and the currently-disgruntled wife of one of the members of Elvis' famous entourage, the Memphis Mafia. After Elvis' dynamite first performance in Vegas, you find yourself in deep water when his magnetism finally gets to you after all these years. [ Fem!Reader ]
TW: Brief talk of alcohol and drug use. Cussing. Mentions of infidelity. Historical inaccuracies in the Vegas timeline. Priscilla doesn't exist in this timeline. This part is rather tame. but the others definitely won't be.
Rating: PG (ish?) (but this story will be very NSFW, 18+, so minors Do NOT Interact) || Word Count: 3172
A/N: It's been a long time, baby! I am rather nervous about posting this because it's been so damn long since I've put my writing out there, but since Black Suit/Pink Scarf Elvis has us all in a chokehold, I figured I should get it out there, so I really hope you enjoy it! I imagined it with Elvis in mind, but Austin!Elvis works here, too, whatever floats your boat! If y'all like it, I've got a very smutty part 2 in the works...
I've linked the song Power of My Love that is referenced in the story, and I highly recommend giving it a listen to get the full effect of the moment.
Apologies in advance if there are any grammatical errors or TW that I didn't catch. I'm honestly trying to get this out into the world as quickly as possible before I chicken out, lol. I've never written a reader fic before, but here we are!
PINK SCARF - PART 1
You can’t take your eyes off him. They keep drifting to him like the pull of a magnet. You want to stop, you really do. You catch yourself and force your gaze back down to the drink you’ve been nursing for the better part of an hour.
Elvis Presley is a supernova. Every bit of him is lit up, shaking hands, telling jokes, drawing people into his radiance. You’ve never quite seen him this way, not like this. He is absolutely glowing after his performance, and you know why. You finally get it after seeing him live tonight.
It scares you a little, how captivated you are. He’d been so alluring, his voice smooth like butter but a little gritty around the edges, strong, deep, supported. You’ve heard him sing a million times, but with that band and the fuel of the crowd, it shook you to you core. Every word resonated with you, his dynamics and skill showing what a master he is of his craft.
Not many people could pull off a white jumpsuit, but he looked incredible—trim, tan, fit—doing his karate stretches on stage. Between that and his crooning, deep baritone, not one woman (and some of the men, to be sure) in that audience stood a chance. Even when the sweat began pouring down his face, you found yourself feeling things you didn’t want to feel.
You’d watched as prim and proper ladies fell apart at his feet. Part of it was hysterically funny to you, but another part understood that deep, biological need to be in his presence.
You’d always known that, no matter how much you’d pushed those feelings away.
You swirl your drink again, watching the last bits of ice melt, taking a small sip.
You knew how nervous Elvis had been about tonight, beneath all the bravado and jokes. You’d sensed it in his opening moments, his legs vibrating so quickly he could’ve taken off in flight, but the roar of the crowd had given him back what he needed most, that deep confidence of performing that had been buried under terrible, low budget movies for the last decade. It had been magical to watch.
Despite yourself, your gaze finds him again in the crowd. His breathy, musical laugh echoes across the room. It’s a beautiful sound, especially after years of his more moody, depressed state as he was being drained dry creatively. But tonight, his 1,000-megawatt smile lights up the room.
And, god help you, that tailored black suit with the high collar, with no shirt underneath, just a silky black and pink scarf over his bronze chest has you shifting in your seat a little to try and quell the warmth low in your belly.
Jesus, get a grip.
He just looks so fucking amazing, and with that natural charisma of his oozing out of his pores, even you aren’t immune to it. It is frustrating, in more ways than one.
Elvis suddenly looks at you, catching your stare. Those dreamy deep blue eyes sparkle and lock on you, but you look away quickly, blushing despite yourself, turning back to your watered-down cocktail. Your heart flips in your chest, which pisses you off. You’re an adult woman, for god’s sake, not a teenager. An adult married woman, for that matter.
You scoff bitterly at that thought. You wouldn’t really call what you were living with a true marriage. Marriage required two people to actually be in the same room, to actually communicate. Marriage seemed like a make-believe fairytale to you now, after all this time. You barely remember what it was like to feel happy around Jack.
Speaking of, you are alone at the bar, Jack nowhere to be found. Your husband has been part of Elvis’ inner circle forever, one of his early friends who remembered the days before he was a superstar. An integral part of the Memphis Mafia, helping keep the strange life of the world’s first superstar on track and less lonely.
You knew of the rumors, about the girls that frequented the house in Los Angeles. You tried not to dwell on it, but part of you hated Elvis a little for it. If not for him, you might have a normal, fulfilled marriage. Instead, you have a husband who is around a fraction of the time and when he is around, he’s either intoxicated with some substance or bending to EP’s every little whim. Not to mention the lipstick marks left on his clothes and the way he barely even hides the fact that he’s screwing around anymore.
Sometimes you cursed the day you met Elvis Presley.
Good, you think. The anger is tempering the swell of unwanted feelings you’re having for the man. And Elvis is just a man, after all, you remind yourself.
You’d been amazed by him in those early days, meeting the great Elvis Presley and being brought into his inner circle. It was like a dream. And he was every bit as magical as he appeared to be, though also surprisingly down to earth and generous. The gifts—jewelry, cars, the housing at Graceland—were unbelievable. And the man was insanely charming, friendly, and smart, making you feel like a part of the family. He’d even been in your wedding, for god’s sake.
But after that, the shine had worn off, and the partying lifestyle that was fun at first became a strain on your relationships. Years of living in the Elvis bubble took a toll. Days of the week no longer had meaning—you were staying up all night and sleeping during the day, which made it hard to have a job or friends outside the group or to see family. And then it became clear that there was no place for the wives on the road.
There was a cost to being EP’s friend, a deep, lonely one.
It didn’t help that Elvis sometimes played a bit of a cat and mouse game with you, his flirtations varying from light and fun to the occasional serious come-on after a long night or deep conversation. You had always rebuked him, laughing him off, which, considering who he was, was not always easy.
Over the years, it had become a bit of a teasing repartee between the two of you. It would be stupid to try and deny there weren’t a couple of times you’d when you’d gone to bed and let your thoughts drift towards the decidedly inappropriate in regard to Elvis, but you were only human. But you had loved Jack, and so did Elvis, so it was never truly an issue.
Plus, there was a “code” with the men—Elvis didn’t mess with their ladies, and they didn’t mess with his, though you weren’t sure how strictly that code was followed. Nevertheless, Elvis had never pressured you into anything more. You wondered if he enjoyed the fact that you were off-limits, though you had a hard time believing he thought about you much at all considering the throngs of pretty young things that threw themselves at him on a regular basis.
At that, you down the last of your drink, the slight burn tempered by the melted ice. I’m just tired, and honestly, it’s been too long since I’ve been laid, you think with chagrin, blaming all this uncharacteristic thinking on the hour. It’s been a long night.
You are about ready to call it quits when that deep Southern drawl rumbles from behind you, right into your ear, making you jump in your seat.
“Those pretty little eyes of yours have been burning holes into me all night, lil’ mama,” Elvis says quietly, the tickle of his breath sending a wave of heat over your entire body.
You stiffen and don’t dare turn towards him. “I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you scoff, but your face feels like it’s on fire.
“Mm hmm,” he hums in your ear, obviously amused by catching you. That in itself sends a shock of feeling into your belly that mortifies you.
His presence behind you looms large, and he is so close that you can feel the warmth radiating off him. He does not touch you but his essence, his powerful energy, surrounds you nonetheless. You don’t need to see his face to know he is still riding high from his performance, feeling particularly bold.
Elvis spins the barstool around, forcing you to face him, to look up at him. You steel yourself, trying to appear as nonchalant as possible, despite your flushed cheeks. You roll your eyes up at him slowly, as if bored by his playfulness.
“Is there something you need, Elvis?” you ask dryly. The unique scent of him surrounds you and you try your best to not be distracted by the tufts of dark hair on his tan, bare chest, which is currently at your eye level.
“Is there something you want to give me?” he smiles down at you, eyes sparkling with mischievousness. Closing the space between you, his lean body traps you against the bar.
The blatant innuendo is not lost on you, and you can’t seem to help the way it tingles down your spine. But tonight you want to wipe that smirk right off his pretty face more than you want to humor him.
So, you stand, slowly, refusing to step back, boldly holding his blue-eyed gaze with your own. This causes you to practically roll up his lean body, so close you are almost, but not quite, touching. His bedroom eyes change from playful to surprise to something a little more dangerous as you continue to stare at each other.
“Goodnight, Elvis,” you say, tilting your head, meeting his challenge. Your heart thunders in your ears, but you make no indication of it. The tension between you sits, heavy for a beat and it might be your imagination playing tricks on you, but you swear he leans forward the slightest bit.
This prompts you grab your clutch off the bar and sidestep him, leaving him hanging there, as you stride towards the exit, the heels of your shoes striking the floor confidently. You smile to yourself, at the fortitude of your will to repel the advances of the most desired man on the planet. It doesn’t even matter to you that those advances were more in jest than anything. At least you had the upper hand in the end.
Or so you think.
(In actuality, your ability to reject him is exactly what piques his interest.)
Then you’re out into the cool lobby, a refreshing change after the humid room full of people you’d been in for the last few hours. It wakes you up a little, clears your head a bit. You’re almost to the elevator, reaching for the call button, when suddenly Elvis is there, cutting you off. You didn’t even hear him approach.
“Jesus!” you cry in surprise, jumping back despite yourself. Your heel catches, and you begin to tumble backwards.
He’s there in an instant, one arm grabbing you by the waist, the other steadying you on your back. You grip his firm bicep, gasping. He pulls you up into him.
His touch burns through your dress, and you suddenly realize that all these years, you’ve often avoided touching him beyond a casual arm graze or shoulder grab.
And now you’re intimately confronted with the reason why.
It’s electric between you, positively buzzing, lighting your nerves on fire. Being this close, too close, your body actually pressed into his is completely unraveling to your senses. The deliciously spicy smell of his cologne mingled with his sweat surrounds you to a nearly dizzyingly degree.
“Not Jesus, y/n honey, just me,” he jokes, but it’s practically a whisper, a dreamy lullaby. He grips your waist.
Don’t look up, don’t look up, don’t look up, you warn yourself, but you cannot help it, it’s like you are under a spell. It’s like you are seeing him, experiencing him, for the first time again tonight.
His skin is glowing with the lightest sheen of sweat and his jet-black hair is somehow perfectly mussed. His lips are luscious and soft, the lower one perfectly pouty. Dark stubble covers his angled jaw and upper lip in a shadow (he must have to shave every day to keep it at bay, considering the insane state of those sideburns, you think absently). But it’s his eyes that nearly destroy you.
Still slightly rimmed with dark makeup, those blue eyes pop and burn as they drift down you face. His lashes are dark and impossibly long, batting closed then open again as he looks back into your eyes. It completely takes your breath away. His preternatural handsomeness overwhelms you.
You are only human.
Suddenly, the elevator dings and opens. This jolts you out of the spell, and you push back quickly at the distraction, both grateful for and a little sad at the interruption of whatever strange moment you were having.
He watches you intently, curiously as you fluster, brushing yourself off. You’re looking everywhere but him because if you truly look at him again, you are afraid you’ll never stop. You skirt around him for the second time that night, escaping into the open elevator.
He stops the door closing with his hand, then leans, his long body filling the doorway.
“Where you goin’, honey?” Honey comes out just like it sounds, dripping and viscous. It pours through your veins, warm and sweet. A thousand times he’s used that word, but he’s never said it like this, not to you.
You can barely think, thoroughly discombobulated, but wanting more than anything to not appear that way. You lift your chin, hitting the number for your floor, if nothing more than to give you an excuse not to look at him. You heart rams against your ribcage so hard, you’re afraid he’s able to hear it.
“It’s late, and I’m tired,” you say, trying to keep you voice even, crisp, definitive. You grip your clutch in front of you as if your life depends on it, as if the small thing will create a magic boundary around you that keeps you from whatever hold he’s got on you. From doing something entirely stupid.
Elvis just cocks his head at you, that beautiful lip of his curling up the slightest bit, as if in on a joke you’re not privy to.
That’s when you hear it, the music in the elevator. The hotel has been playing him nonstop because of the opening of the show. It’s one of his most recent hits—Power of My Love—his sexy, gritty voice shooting through the speakers with a heavy blues beat, punctuated by the moans and sighs of women in the background. It’s nearly obscene.
He continues to hold the door, watching you too intently as the music plays through the chorus, each lyric making you blush more than the last:
There’s just no stoppin’ the way I feel for you
‘Cause every minute, every hour you’ll be shaken
By the strength and mighty power of my love.
Yeah, yeah, baby I want you, you’ll never get away.
My love will haunt you, yes, haunt you night and day-ay-ay.
Elvis looks you up and down, eyes smoldering in a way you’ve never seen directed at you, that famous slow, knowing grin of his spreading across his face. It’s like he can sense what all this is doing to you and is pleased by your reaction.
“Couldn’t have said it better myself,” he muses. He stands straight, releasing the door, and begins to step into the elevator with you. The move is confident, presumptuous, dangerous.
Oh god, oh god, oh god, please do not get on this elevator. Shock ripples through you, freezing you to the spot.
If Elvis gets on with you, there is no telling what will happen. You feel completely off the rails, out of control, and are barely holding yourself together because of this man. Which is entirely stupid because you have known him for years and he’s your husband’s friend, your friend, but for some silly reason you are having this crazy physical reaction to him. He’s got a hold on you and the worst part is, he knows it.
Squealing suddenly comes from the lobby, and Elvis is suddenly caught in a wave of female fans, begging for his attention. Distracted, he turns, and the elevator doors begin to close. He’s not quick enough because of the onslaught to catch it again, instead giving you a regretful look before succumbing to the horde.
As the doors shut and the elevator lurches up, you gasp, not realizing you’d been holding your breath. You are shaken that you were so suddenly and intensely caught up in him. It’s ridiculous, especially after all this time, after seeing him in his worst moods and practically living in his house for years.
Maybe it’s because tonight, you are seeing him at his best, and that is why you are so overcome.
His voice comes through the speakers, surrounding you, still crooning about how there’s no way you’ll escape his love. You shiver again, down to your toes, remembering the look on his face as you listened to the song.
Oh, this is bad. This could be very bad.
Or very good, a small voice counters.
You shake your head, then burst out of the elevator and book it for your room.
What has he done to you?
As the door closes behind you, you find yourself fluttering around the room with nervous energy. Why now? Why after all this time are his silly flirtations affecting you like this?
For once, you are relieved that Jack isn’t here, preferring to work through this on your own without having to put on an act. Pulling off your heels, you try and convince yourself you must have been imagining it, that the electricity between you two was most likely the product of your tired and slightly tipsy brain coupled with Elvis’ post-show magnetism. You’d never seen him perform live before, and it was kind of an otherworldly experience.
That must be it. It had to be.
If you could only shake that dangerous, heated look he gave you. The bold innuendos. The burn of his hands through your dress.
Stop it! you chide yourself.
Knowing Elvis, this could go one of two ways, you think:
He could instantly write it all off as a joke, poking and teasing at you now and again, like he’s done for years. You hope this is what he decides on and think since most of it is probably in your head anyway, this is the most likely scenario.
On the other hand, if you aren’t imagining things, it’s possible he could get focused on it. And you know that when Elvis homes in on something he wants, he’s not liable to give up easily. The man could be relentlessly stubborn.
And based on the heat coursing through your body right now, you’re not sure after tonight how long you’d be able to resist him.
Or if you even want to.
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Happy one year anniversary to the post that started it all!!
And happy 54th anniversary to this legendary outfit!! 💗🧣💗
It’s amazing how much has happened in a year and honestly, this anniversary overwhelms me a little bit for both obvious and not so obvious reasons. Making this post was where I got my original inspiration for Pink Scarf and my first post in this fandom that got any sort of traction. Since then, I’ve met so many wonderful, supportive people in this amazing community and I am so happy to be a part of such a group. You’ve changed my life in so many incredible ways and I wish I could accurately convey my feelings in this moment but it really comes down to being so grateful: to you all, to Elvis, to all the friends I’ve made here, to the multitude of little things that brought me here. I love y’all. 💗 And happy anniversary—this one’s for us! 💗🧣💗
Warning: Consensual smut, fingering, boys talking about sex and being crude.
Summary: Elvis and the guys get into Shreveport late one Friday night and he runs into Freddie. Taking advantage of the opportunity, Elvis takes her out for dinner as he hopes for something more.
Read it here
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the
Organization for Transformative Works
Thanks to my alpha @whositmcwhatsit for reading multiple drafts of this chapter and to all my Elvis fic friends @vintageshanny @from-memphis-with-love @shakerattlescroll @be-my-ally @missmaywemeetagain @powerofelvis @peskybedtime @lookingforrainbows @ellie-24 for helping me get through the summer and keep hope a live. xoxox
Let me know if you would like to be added to the taglist, and thanks for reading. Reblogs, comments feedback and corrections desired and encouraged
“As far as the humor is concerned,” says Ronnie Tutt, “Elvis, as much as anybody I’ve ever known in my life, loved to laugh. He was a very emotional man when it came to that. He didn’t hesitate to laugh or cry. His whole life was built around trying to find humor in things.”
Prompt: You are part of Elvis Presley's coveted inner circle, and the currently-disgruntled wife of one of the members of Elvis' famous entourage, the Memphis Mafia. After Elvis' dynamite first performance in Vegas, you find yourself in deep water when his magnetism finally gets to you after all these years. [ Fem!Reader ]
TW: Brief talk of alcohol and drug use. Cussing. Mentions of infidelity. Historical inaccuracies in the Vegas timeline. Priscilla doesn't exist in this timeline. This part is rather tame. but the others definitely won't be.
Rating: PG (ish?) (but this story will be very NSFW, 18+, so minors Do NOT Interact) || Word Count: 3172
A/N: It's been a long time, baby! I am rather nervous about posting this because it's been so damn long since I've put my writing out there, but since Black Suit/Pink Scarf Elvis has us all in a chokehold, I figured I should get it out there, so I really hope you enjoy it! I imagined it with Elvis in mind, but Austin!Elvis works here, too, whatever floats your boat! If y'all like it, I've got a very smutty part 2 in the works...
I've linked the song Power of My Love that is referenced in the story, and I highly recommend giving it a listen to get the full effect of the moment.
Apologies in advance if there are any grammatical errors or TW that I didn't catch. I'm honestly trying to get this out into the world as quickly as possible before I chicken out, lol. I've never written a reader fic before, but here we are!
PINK SCARF - PART 1
You can’t take your eyes off him. They keep drifting to him like the pull of a magnet. You want to stop, you really do. You catch yourself and force your gaze back down to the drink you’ve been nursing for the better part of an hour.
Elvis Presley is a supernova. Every bit of him is lit up, shaking hands, telling jokes, drawing people into his radiance. You’ve never quite seen him this way, not like this. He is absolutely glowing after his performance, and you know why. You finally get it after seeing him live tonight.
It scares you a little, how captivated you are. He’d been so alluring, his voice smooth like butter but a little gritty around the edges, strong, deep, supported. You’ve heard him sing a million times, but with that band and the fuel of the crowd, it shook you to you core. Every word resonated with you, his dynamics and skill showing what a master he is of his craft.
Not many people could pull off a white jumpsuit, but he looked incredible—trim, tan, fit—doing his karate stretches on stage. Between that and his crooning, deep baritone, not one woman (and some of the men, to be sure) in that audience stood a chance. Even when the sweat began pouring down his face, you found yourself feeling things you didn’t want to feel.
You’d watched as prim and proper ladies fell apart at his feet. Part of it was hysterically funny to you, but another part understood that deep, biological need to be in his presence.
You’d always known that, no matter how much you’d pushed those feelings away.
You swirl your drink again, watching the last bits of ice melt, taking a small sip.
You knew how nervous Elvis had been about tonight, beneath all the bravado and jokes. You’d sensed it in his opening moments, his legs vibrating so quickly he could’ve taken off in flight, but the roar of the crowd had given him back what he needed most, that deep confidence of performing that had been buried under terrible, low budget movies for the last decade. It had been magical to watch.
Despite yourself, your gaze finds him again in the crowd. His breathy, musical laugh echoes across the room. It’s a beautiful sound, especially after years of his more moody, depressed state as he was being drained dry creatively. But tonight, his 1,000-megawatt smile lights up the room.
And, god help you, that tailored black suit with the high collar, with no shirt underneath, just a silky black and pink scarf over his bronze chest has you shifting in your seat a little to try and quell the warmth low in your belly.
Jesus, get a grip.
He just looks so fucking amazing, and with that natural charisma of his oozing out of his pores, even you aren’t immune to it. It is frustrating, in more ways than one.
Elvis suddenly looks at you, catching your stare. Those dreamy deep blue eyes sparkle and lock on you, but you look away quickly, blushing despite yourself, turning back to your watered-down cocktail. Your heart flips in your chest, which pisses you off. You’re an adult woman, for god’s sake, not a teenager. An adult married woman, for that matter.
You scoff bitterly at that thought. You wouldn’t really call what you were living with a true marriage. Marriage required two people to actually be in the same room, to actually communicate. Marriage seemed like a make-believe fairytale to you now, after all this time. You barely remember what it was like to feel happy around Jack.
Speaking of, you are alone at the bar, Jack nowhere to be found. Your husband has been part of Elvis’ inner circle forever, one of his early friends who remembered the days before he was a superstar. An integral part of the Memphis Mafia, helping keep the strange life of the world’s first superstar on track and less lonely.
You knew of the rumors, about the girls that frequented the house in Los Angeles. You tried not to dwell on it, but part of you hated Elvis a little for it. If not for him, you might have a normal, fulfilled marriage. Instead, you have a husband who is around a fraction of the time and when he is around, he’s either intoxicated with some substance or bending to EP’s every little whim. Not to mention the lipstick marks left on his clothes and the way he barely even hides the fact that he’s screwing around anymore.
Sometimes you cursed the day you met Elvis Presley.
Good, you think. The anger is tempering the swell of unwanted feelings you’re having for the man. And Elvis is just a man, after all, you remind yourself.
You’d been amazed by him in those early days, meeting the great Elvis Presley and being brought into his inner circle. It was like a dream. And he was every bit as magical as he appeared to be, though also surprisingly down to earth and generous. The gifts—jewelry, cars, the housing at Graceland—were unbelievable. And the man was insanely charming, friendly, and smart, making you feel like a part of the family. He’d even been in your wedding, for god’s sake.
But after that, the shine had worn off, and the partying lifestyle that was fun at first became a strain on your relationships. Years of living in the Elvis bubble took a toll. Days of the week no longer had meaning—you were staying up all night and sleeping during the day, which made it hard to have a job or friends outside the group or to see family. And then it became clear that there was no place for the wives on the road.
There was a cost to being EP’s friend, a deep, lonely one.
It didn’t help that Elvis sometimes played a bit of a cat and mouse game with you, his flirtations varying from light and fun to the occasional serious come-on after a long night or deep conversation. You had always rebuked him, laughing him off, which, considering who he was, was not always easy.
Over the years, it had become a bit of a teasing repartee between the two of you. It would be stupid to try and deny there weren’t a couple of times you’d when you’d gone to bed and let your thoughts drift towards the decidedly inappropriate in regard to Elvis, but you were only human. But you had loved Jack, and so did Elvis, so it was never truly an issue.
Plus, there was a “code” with the men—Elvis didn’t mess with their ladies, and they didn’t mess with his, though you weren’t sure how strictly that code was followed. Nevertheless, Elvis had never pressured you into anything more. You wondered if he enjoyed the fact that you were off-limits, though you had a hard time believing he thought about you much at all considering the throngs of pretty young things that threw themselves at him on a regular basis.
At that, you down the last of your drink, the slight burn tempered by the melted ice. I’m just tired, and honestly, it’s been too long since I’ve been laid, you think with chagrin, blaming all this uncharacteristic thinking on the hour. It’s been a long night.
You are about ready to call it quits when that deep Southern drawl rumbles from behind you, right into your ear, making you jump in your seat.
“Those pretty little eyes of yours have been burning holes into me all night, lil’ mama,” Elvis says quietly, the tickle of his breath sending a wave of heat over your entire body.
You stiffen and don’t dare turn towards him. “I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you scoff, but your face feels like it’s on fire.
“Mm hmm,” he hums in your ear, obviously amused by catching you. That in itself sends a shock of feeling into your belly that mortifies you.
His presence behind you looms large, and he is so close that you can feel the warmth radiating off him. He does not touch you but his essence, his powerful energy, surrounds you nonetheless. You don’t need to see his face to know he is still riding high from his performance, feeling particularly bold.
Elvis spins the barstool around, forcing you to face him, to look up at him. You steel yourself, trying to appear as nonchalant as possible, despite your flushed cheeks. You roll your eyes up at him slowly, as if bored by his playfulness.
“Is there something you need, Elvis?” you ask dryly. The unique scent of him surrounds you and you try your best to not be distracted by the tufts of dark hair on his tan, bare chest, which is currently at your eye level.
“Is there something you want to give me?” he smiles down at you, eyes sparkling with mischievousness. Closing the space between you, his lean body traps you against the bar.
The blatant innuendo is not lost on you, and you can’t seem to help the way it tingles down your spine. But tonight you want to wipe that smirk right off his pretty face more than you want to humor him.
So, you stand, slowly, refusing to step back, boldly holding his blue-eyed gaze with your own. This causes you to practically roll up his lean body, so close you are almost, but not quite, touching. His bedroom eyes change from playful to surprise to something a little more dangerous as you continue to stare at each other.
“Goodnight, Elvis,” you say, tilting your head, meeting his challenge. Your heart thunders in your ears, but you make no indication of it. The tension between you sits, heavy for a beat and it might be your imagination playing tricks on you, but you swear he leans forward the slightest bit.
This prompts you grab your clutch off the bar and sidestep him, leaving him hanging there, as you stride towards the exit, the heels of your shoes striking the floor confidently. You smile to yourself, at the fortitude of your will to repel the advances of the most desired man on the planet. It doesn’t even matter to you that those advances were more in jest than anything. At least you had the upper hand in the end.
Or so you think.
(In actuality, your ability to reject him is exactly what piques his interest.)
Then you’re out into the cool lobby, a refreshing change after the humid room full of people you’d been in for the last few hours. It wakes you up a little, clears your head a bit. You’re almost to the elevator, reaching for the call button, when suddenly Elvis is there, cutting you off. You didn’t even hear him approach.
“Jesus!” you cry in surprise, jumping back despite yourself. Your heel catches, and you begin to tumble backwards.
He’s there in an instant, one arm grabbing you by the waist, the other steadying you on your back. You grip his firm bicep, gasping. He pulls you up into him.
His touch burns through your dress, and you suddenly realize that all these years, you’ve often avoided touching him beyond a casual arm graze or shoulder grab.
And now you’re intimately confronted with the reason why.
It’s electric between you, positively buzzing, lighting your nerves on fire. Being this close, too close, your body actually pressed into his is completely unraveling to your senses. The deliciously spicy smell of his cologne mingled with his sweat surrounds you to a nearly dizzyingly degree.
“Not Jesus, y/n honey, just me,” he jokes, but it’s practically a whisper, a dreamy lullaby. He grips your waist.
Don’t look up, don’t look up, don’t look up, you warn yourself, but you cannot help it, it’s like you are under a spell. It’s like you are seeing him, experiencing him, for the first time again tonight.
His skin is glowing with the lightest sheen of sweat and his jet-black hair is somehow perfectly mussed. His lips are luscious and soft, the lower one perfectly pouty. Dark stubble covers his angled jaw and upper lip in a shadow (he must have to shave every day to keep it at bay, considering the insane state of those sideburns, you think absently). But it’s his eyes that nearly destroy you.
Still slightly rimmed with dark makeup, those blue eyes pop and burn as they drift down you face. His lashes are dark and impossibly long, batting closed then open again as he looks back into your eyes. It completely takes your breath away. His preternatural handsomeness overwhelms you.
You are only human.
Suddenly, the elevator dings and opens. This jolts you out of the spell, and you push back quickly at the distraction, both grateful for and a little sad at the interruption of whatever strange moment you were having.
He watches you intently, curiously as you fluster, brushing yourself off. You’re looking everywhere but him because if you truly look at him again, you are afraid you’ll never stop. You skirt around him for the second time that night, escaping into the open elevator.
He stops the door closing with his hand, then leans, his long body filling the doorway.
“Where you goin’, honey?” Honey comes out just like it sounds, dripping and viscous. It pours through your veins, warm and sweet. A thousand times he’s used that word, but he’s never said it like this, not to you.
You can barely think, thoroughly discombobulated, but wanting more than anything to not appear that way. You lift your chin, hitting the number for your floor, if nothing more than to give you an excuse not to look at him. You heart rams against your ribcage so hard, you’re afraid he’s able to hear it.
“It’s late, and I’m tired,” you say, trying to keep you voice even, crisp, definitive. You grip your clutch in front of you as if your life depends on it, as if the small thing will create a magic boundary around you that keeps you from whatever hold he’s got on you. From doing something entirely stupid.
Elvis just cocks his head at you, that beautiful lip of his curling up the slightest bit, as if in on a joke you’re not privy to.
That’s when you hear it, the music in the elevator. The hotel has been playing him nonstop because of the opening of the show. It’s one of his most recent hits—Power of My Love—his sexy, gritty voice shooting through the speakers with a heavy blues beat, punctuated by the moans and sighs of women in the background. It’s nearly obscene.
He continues to hold the door, watching you too intently as the music plays through the chorus, each lyric making you blush more than the last:
There’s just no stoppin’ the way I feel for you
‘Cause every minute, every hour you’ll be shaken
By the strength and mighty power of my love.
Yeah, yeah, baby I want you, you’ll never get away.
My love will haunt you, yes, haunt you night and day-ay-ay.
Elvis looks you up and down, eyes smoldering in a way you’ve never seen directed at you, that famous slow, knowing grin of his spreading across his face. It’s like he can sense what all this is doing to you and is pleased by your reaction.
“Couldn’t have said it better myself,” he muses. He stands straight, releasing the door, and begins to step into the elevator with you. The move is confident, presumptuous, dangerous.
Oh god, oh god, oh god, please do not get on this elevator. Shock ripples through you, freezing you to the spot.
If Elvis gets on with you, there is no telling what will happen. You feel completely off the rails, out of control, and are barely holding yourself together because of this man. Which is entirely stupid because you have known him for years and he’s your husband’s friend, your friend, but for some silly reason you are having this crazy physical reaction to him. He’s got a hold on you and the worst part is, he knows it.
Squealing suddenly comes from the lobby, and Elvis is suddenly caught in a wave of female fans, begging for his attention. Distracted, he turns, and the elevator doors begin to close. He’s not quick enough because of the onslaught to catch it again, instead giving you a regretful look before succumbing to the horde.
As the doors shut and the elevator lurches up, you gasp, not realizing you’d been holding your breath. You are shaken that you were so suddenly and intensely caught up in him. It’s ridiculous, especially after all this time, after seeing him in his worst moods and practically living in his house for years.
Maybe it’s because tonight, you are seeing him at his best, and that is why you are so overcome.
His voice comes through the speakers, surrounding you, still crooning about how there’s no way you’ll escape his love. You shiver again, down to your toes, remembering the look on his face as you listened to the song.
Oh, this is bad. This could be very bad.
Or very good, a small voice counters.
You shake your head, then burst out of the elevator and book it for your room.
What has he done to you?
As the door closes behind you, you find yourself fluttering around the room with nervous energy. Why now? Why after all this time are his silly flirtations affecting you like this?
For once, you are relieved that Jack isn’t here, preferring to work through this on your own without having to put on an act. Pulling off your heels, you try and convince yourself you must have been imagining it, that the electricity between you two was most likely the product of your tired and slightly tipsy brain coupled with Elvis’ post-show magnetism. You’d never seen him perform live before, and it was kind of an otherworldly experience.
That must be it. It had to be.
If you could only shake that dangerous, heated look he gave you. The bold innuendos. The burn of his hands through your dress.
Stop it! you chide yourself.
Knowing Elvis, this could go one of two ways, you think:
He could instantly write it all off as a joke, poking and teasing at you now and again, like he’s done for years. You hope this is what he decides on and think since most of it is probably in your head anyway, this is the most likely scenario.
On the other hand, if you aren’t imagining things, it’s possible he could get focused on it. And you know that when Elvis homes in on something he wants, he’s not liable to give up easily. The man could be relentlessly stubborn.
And based on the heat coursing through your body right now, you’re not sure after tonight how long you’d be able to resist him.
Or if you even want to.
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The rehearsals for the filming of the documentary That’s The Way It Is began at the International Hotel in Las Vegas, and continued for the following three days. Elvis’ background singers, The Sweet Inspirations, The Imperials, and Millie Kirkham, were scheduled at 1 pm with Elvis. Elvis and his entire group consisting of singers and his band began at 7 pm.
Photos: Elvis in rehearsals for That’s The Way It Is; August 4, 1970.
Thank you so much for your patience as I got this up on different platforms due to unforeseen life crap! 💗 Okay, so Chapter 11 got a bit away from me length wise, so for sanity's sake (and so I can make some more revisions to some much-anticipated sexy times 🤭), I am posting part one of the chapter instead of making y'all wait any longer.
Some major, life-altering things went down in Chapter 10 and this chapter from Lori's perspective deals with a bit of the reality and consequences of that. (You can refresh your memory here if you need to!) We jump back in the next morning. She's got A LOT of feels going on in this chapter leading into some more twists and turns in 11.2, so the ending of this might feel a bit abrupt since it will all be part of the same chapter. Sorry!
Also, please excuse my alterations of some of the recording dates a bit to serve the story!
Anyway, as always. I can't wait to hear what you think! 💋
Loves and kisses, Madi xoxoxoxo 💗
TW: So many angsty feels, the Colonel, pregnancy and related symptoms, fear of miscarriage, Elvis and his endless PDA...smut to come in part 2 🤭
Broken Glass Chapter 11.1
“You’re what?!”
You wince at the way Tom Parker spits the words out, his shock and ire so palpable it feels like a slap to the face. The anxiousness skyrocketing through you, paired with the rapid beat of your heart knocking against your ribs, leaves you unable to look at the man, but you know he’s furious.
“We’re getting married. As soon as possible,” Elvis repeats firmly, grabbing your hand and squeezing. It seems unconscious the way he steps slightly in front of you, as if shielding you from the older man’s anger. You appreciate the gesture. No one, save for your mother, has ever protected you.
Elvis sounds so steadfast and sure about all of it. He’s a better actor than people give him credit for, but this performance is going above and beyond anything you’d assumed he was capable of.
Or maybe he means it.
Your heart flips, just the way it did last night when he asked you to marry him.
The last 24 hours have gone and changed everything so quickly that your head is still spinning. The moment when Elvis kneeled on the bathroom floor with you, wiped away your sick, and offered to fix everything, it felt so very real. There wasn’t an ounce of hesitation in his eyes.
And despite it being an arrangement born out of necessity and not love, it was nothing like Gianni’s horrific proposal.
Your stomach turns at the memory of that nightmare before Parker’s voice cuts through, bringing you back to the task at hand.
“What in God’s name has gotten into you, boy?” The beady-eyed man glares around Elvis’ broad shoulders at you. You resist the urge to shiver under his accusatory gaze. “Did you threaten to go to the press, young lady? Is this about money?”
“Hey, now, Colonel,” Elvis says, deceptively calm, but his voice is low with warning. “It’s not like that at all. And you best mind your tone.”
Parker’s eyes flicker to Elvis with an edge of surprise, taking in Elvis’ protective stance and words in silence. You get the impression Elvis hasn’t stood up to the man before, not like this, anyhow. The crackle of tension in the air has you all on edge.
The older man’s eyes narrow shrewdly, and you worry you won’t be able to pull this off. You’ve observed enough in the last month to understand the influence he has over Elvis, the slight manipulations he wields, pushing Elvis right where he wants him.
Parker looks at you with scrutiny. He takes you in from head to toe. Your breath catches in your throat and you want nothing more than to disappear and pretend the last day was a dream. But you cannot. Forcing yourself to hold his stare, you remind yourself of everything at stake here.
There is no doubt in your mind he will throw you to the wolves the moment he senses anything amiss, the moment you threaten the image of his star client. So it has to be crystal clear you are here to stay, even though it makes you sick to lie.
But there are much worse things than white lies waiting for you out in the world. And as heartbroken and shocked as you are about this baby, you already know you’ll do anything to protect it.
You aren’t even conscious of the way your hand splays over your stomach, not until Parker’s eyes freeze there. His eyes snap up to yours and then to Elvis.
“Oh, you didn’t,” Parker groans. “Christ, I picked this one specifically because I thought she was smart enough not to fall into bed with you the minute you two were alone. Turns out she’s smarter than I gave her credit for—she managed to ensnare you and ensure she’d always be tied to Elvis Presley,” he spits.
Your cheeks flame hot with the accusation, and you can’t hold back your gasp at his insinuation, even though it shouldn’t be a surprise.
Elvis squeezes your hand tight and points at Parker, his eyes stormy and livid. “Don’t you dare blame her for this! On the train, you made it clear how she needed to improve her ‘attitude’ towards me and I told ya not to worry. Well, I took care of it,” he shrugs flippantly.
You try not to gape at his blasé attitude, wanting to trust Elvis to do what he needs to make this convincing.
“You damn well know I didn’t mean ‘get her pregnant’!” Parker hisses. “And we had this talk when you were just starting out! I know you know better than to—”
“I’m in love with her,” Elvis interrupts with such conviction your stomach swoops and you need to school your face to look like you aren’t amazed by how truthful his statement sounds. The earnestness on his handsome face takes your breath away.
Tom looks sorry for him. “Oh, son, we both know how easily you fall in love. But I don’t think you understand the gravity or responsibility of starting a family. What it’ll do to your image. Girls want you unattached and available, and they’re the ones buying the records."
From anyone else, it might be imbued with caring and concern, but coming from Parker, it is backhanded and insulting with the way he talks down to Elvis, as though he were still a 19-year-old kid instead of a 25-year-old man. But he does it with the finesse of a snake charmer.
You watch Elvis carefully as he recoils a bit, an innocence flashing over his features you’ve only seen in his most vulnerable moments making a quick appearance. For a second, you are terrified he’ll cave and you’ll have to pack your bags and head West after all. Thankfully, he blinks it away, steeling himself with the stubbornness which usually drives you crazy but just might work in your favor today.
“We’re in love. We’re gettin’ married, and that’s all there is to it.” It comes out as a growl and the sound reaches down to your toes.
Parker shakes his head, grasping at anything to control his client. There’s a carefully veiled desperation in his voice which barely conceals the threat he now lobs at Elvis: “This’ll ruin you, boy! What will your father do when the money is gone, hmm? Your cousins? Your friends? That big house you bought your mother? It’ll all be gone.”
Elvis looks as though he’s been slapped. But not you. Life has made you good at reading people, at seeing through men like this. Perhaps it is the fact you are running on adrenaline or because you have so much to lose, but you find yourself furious at Parker for speaking this way to Elvis.
“And after everything I’ve done to ensure your success, you’d throw it all away for—”
“How?” You barely register you’ve spoken until Parker’s glare lands on you.
Elvis looks down at you with surprise. It wasn’t part of the plan for you to interject; Elvis thought he could handle Parker on his own.
“How exactly will getting married and having a family ‘ruin’ him? Last I checked, you weren’t a young woman. How do you know it won’t help him? His audience is growing up and getting married, so why can’t he?” you say, a fierceness you usually rely on at work slicing through your nervousness.
“Young lady, you best shut your mouth before you get yourself in more trouble than you’re already in,” Parker seethes.
“You don’t talk to her that way!” Elvis yells, stepping in front of her, pointing in the older man’s face.
Parker looks taken aback, and you wonder if Elvis has ever stood up for himself the way he’s standing up for you now.
Your heart beats in double time, but you gently put your hand on Elvis’ arm to bring it down. His eyes are blazing but they catch yours and you breathe in slowly, hoping he follows your lead. Once he doesn’t look like he’s going to launch himself at Parker, you speak.
“I was going to be around for the foreseeable future anyhow, isn’t that right? Perhaps much longer based on what the doctor said,” you say, miraculously keeping the tremble out of your voice. “It is easier—and more proper—to explain a wife being by his side than a long-term girlfriend living in his house, yes?”
Parker scoffs but doesn’t speak.
“And there’s nothing more young ladies like me want more than weddings and babies, even more so when the groom is the most handsome and charismatic man on the planet, one they want the best for. They will look at pictures of us and imagine themselves as me, I’d bet. And the men will be much less threatened by the family man who served his country and might come around, too,” you continue with fervor, surprised at how easy it is to be assertive when it’s Elvis you are fighting for.
“It doesn’t matter if he is married or has a thousand babies, Mr. Parker. As long as Elvis is alive and keeps doing what he was born to do, they will flock to him because he is an incredibly talented, gorgeous, and kind man. My being by his side won’t change that one little bit. In fact, a wedding will be free publicity for his comeback album, I’d imagine.”
A breath wooshes out of you now your speech is finished. Your fists squeeze to hide the tremor in your hands. Silence hangs heavy and you shift uncomfortably on your feet, but you force yourself to hold Parker’s eyes.
At first, he looks at you with something akin to shock, which quickly morphs into a smirk as he throws a cigar in his mouth, considering your words, perhaps. He holds the silence and your gaze much longer than he should, and you know it’s a show of dominance. You’ve seen a similar look on the men in la famiglia when they seek to intimidate.
It equally makes you want to stand your ground and shirk back into the woodwork. You don’t want him to win, but you also know you must play a role here, and a man like him will want any good idea to seem like his own. You lower your eyes in faux deference.
“Well, Elvis, we may be able to salvage this yet,” Parker purrs, gumming the end of the cigar.
Elvis’ eyes haven’t left you since your speech—you know because you feel them boring into you—but it’s not until you look back up at those depthless blues that you see the unabashed way he’s staring.
He looks at you like he’s smitten. Like you are everything he could ever need. And he’s blushing as if bashful about what you said. His movie star gaze pins you to the spot, with his bedroom eyes at half-mast and his full lips falling open like he’s going to say something.
You would love to be able to say it didn’t make your heart flip over and your knees a little weak to be looked at like this by him; in fact, you are going to chalk it up to your hormones because this is all part of the act, you are sure.
It’s almost painful, the way you tear your eyes away from him to look at your shoes. Suddenly you are winded and exhausted.
He’s just a patient. Maybe even a friend after everything you’ve been through together this past month. A better actor than anyone gives him credit for.
Madone, I will not swoon over a man just because he’s good at pretending he loves me.
Elvis may have acted like a spoiled, sullen child the days prior to arriving back at Graceland, but you’d never in your life seen had a man so entirely consumed with your wellbeing once he knew something was wrong with you. No man had ever treated you with such care.
A swell of emotion sits like a lump in your throat when you think about his proposal. What he’s giving up to save you. To save your baby.
And he’s been so earnest it makes it hard to compartmentalize the fact this arrangement is a quid pro quo and not some romantic folly. Your mind knows this, but your heart is having trouble keeping up. It doesn’t help when he is looking at you like you hung the moon. Like you are precious and beautiful. Like you matter.
You clear your throat and look away, feeling the blush spread across your cheeks. Then, a wave of overwhelm threatens to consume you. Everything in your world has been upended in the last 24 hours, and on top of that, you still have a job to do, yet your body is fighting you every step of the way.
Pregnant.
Your stomach lurches, but you swallow the toast you’d managed to eat earlier back down. Now is not a moment to appear weak by losing your breakfast all over the floor.
Parker is sizing up the both of you, chewing on the end of his cigar like a cow chewing on cud. It makes you want to squirm, yet you force yourself to remain still.
Elvis grips your hand reassuringly, sensing your discomfort. “It’s early, so that means we should do this as soon as possible, yeah?” He says it as if asking, as if the two of you hadn’t already decided it. You can’t quite tell if he’s asking for approval or if he’s smart enough to know it will go over better if the old man thinks it’s his decision. Either way, it seems to work.
“Mmm, yes. Though some are already going to assume the reason based on your impatience,” Parker counters, pointing at your belly.
“Let ‘em think what they want. But I want it public. I want everyone to know who I’m spendin’ the rest of my life with,” Elvis says definitively.
Parker looks at him and narrows his eyes. “Are you sure, my boy? It’s quite the gamble.”
“Didn’t get where we are by always playin’ safe, did we, Colonel?” Elvis counters.
“Hmm, I suppose not,” he replies after another long moment of scrutiny, “and I know you like to charge ahead without looking, but if we give them too much at once, they might be too ravenous. And we must control the narrative.”
Parker looks at your hand. “Get her a pretty ring, then go out and about and be seen. Tell your boys, your family, but no one else. Let them start talking.” His mind starts whirring, you can tell by the gleam in his eye. “We’ll sell an exclusive to the highest bidder, with terms to run the story along with the release of the album. We’ll push the release up, but that means you need to get up to Nashville in the next few days and finish cutting the record. With singles, RCA is going to need…” He pauses to do the math. “At least 11 or 12 more songs to have enough. You think you can do that, son? With everything going on?” The challenge is clear, but you are surprised to hear concern in his voice, too. Elvis is an ill man, after all, despite how gallant he is.
Elvis nods. “Yessir, I’ll get it done.” There isn’t a lick of doubt in his words.
You, however, are worried it’ll be too much for him. It’s a lot of pressure for anyone on a good day, but for Elvis, this could be dangerous. He’s already been pushing himself to the limit with his childish behavior in Florida. You want to say as much, but Elvis must know what you are thinking because he shoots you a stern look before you can get the words out of your mouth.
“Well, then, when you get back, we’ll have a small ceremony at Graceland. A church wedding is out of the question. Safety, timing, you understand,” Parker adds, shooting you a look like he’s sorry when you both know he is anything but.
You swallow and nod, but a snake of disappointment runs through you, nevertheless. You’d been raised to expect a Catholic ceremony but realize it wouldn’t be possible anyway. Elvis isn’t Catholic. In fact, you aren’t sure what religion Elvis is. The fact you don’t know sinks in your gut.
There is so much you don’t know about the man you’re about to marry.
But he’s not Gianni, you think. And he’s willing and able to give my baby the life it deserves.
And that is enough. It has got to be. Arranged marriages still happen every day—this is no different. A love match was never in the cards for you anyway. Not with your father and Gianni in the picture.
He may drive you crazy at times, but at least with Elvis, you and the baby will be safe and cared for.
You’ll just have to quell any expectations he will see you as more than his nurse. Or more than one of the many girls just passing through.
I shouldn’t have kissed him last night.
You blush at the memory. It was a moment of weakness, but you’d been so overcome with gratitude, shock and relief, you’d let your emotions get the best of you. It was too revealing, too vulnerable, considering your roller coaster of emotions recently regarding him.
It hadn’t helped he’d kissed you back with such commitment. Like he truly wanted you.
It scared you. But you’d backed away instantly after accepting his proposal, convincing yourself the look in his eyes was nothing more than friendly and then busied yourself with putting your clothes back into his—your—closet. Then you’d used your very real exhaustion as an excuse to go right to bed after that, ignoring the gnawing feeling of want in your heart.
Elvis would never love a woman like you. A woman who’s been chewed up and spit out by horrible men, a far cry from the actress and model beauties he is used to. He is a good man, helping a woman in need out of the kindness of his heart, out of a need of his own self-preservation, but you best keep reminding yourself that pity and helpfulness is not love.
Lest you get too caught up in the fairytale you are spinning for the world, you remind yourself that once things settle down, arrangements will need to be made for him to get his other needs met.
It wouldn’t be the first or last time a powerful, famous man had dalliances, after all. They would just need to be discreet.
The thought makes your heart ache and tears prick at the back of your eyes, though you instantly try to push away the uncomfortable feeling. You don’t have time or energy to waste on such nonsense.
It takes a moment to realize the men have stopped talking and are looking at you as though waiting for a response.
“I’m sorry, what?” you say, shaking off your thoughts.
“I asked if you had any family or girlfriends that could assist you in preparations? You’ll need to get a dress and have any family travel in to be here after you get back from Nashville,” Parker says with a raised brow.
Your heart sinks. “Oh, no. There’s no one,” you say, trying not to sound as full of regret as you feel. The few friends from nursing school you had weren’t close enough to stand with you, and while you’d love to have your brothers come, there is no way to do so without alerting your father. And you feel absolutely sick at the idea of him being anywhere near you or Elvis.
Elvis looks at you with surprise. You hadn’t told him directly about the issues with Pop, but you assume he at least expected you to have friends. It’s pathetic, to be sure, but this was the reason you’d agreed to work for him in the first place. You are alone in the world.
Swallowing thickly, you hold your head high, even so.
Elvis, thankfully, takes your cue. “I’m sure Patsy would love to help,” he says with a gentle smile, pulling you into his side, his hand resting high on your waist. His double first cousin had been kind to you in the interactions you’ve had, so you suppose she will do.
You nod in response, hyperaware of the warmth of his hand radiating through your dress. It steadies you, tingling the skin beneath, and his closeness is a welcome anchor in this uncharted territory.
“Well, then, by this time next week, you’ll be newlyweds. I trust you’ll be able to continue to take care of Elvis despite your condition, Miss Cannava?” Parker asks under a veil of concern, but the accusation is palpable.
“I have no intention of shirking my duties, Mr. Parker. I want Elvis to be as healthy as possible.”
“Please, call me Colonel,” he says, an edge in his tone that lets you know your refusal to call him Colonel annoys him. But as much as you want to rub it in, you know you need him on your side.
“Of course, Colonel,” you respond, forcing a smile on your face. “And know I’ll continue to do whatever it takes to help Elvis keep doing what he wants to do.”
You swallow down the threat, adding to your already churning stomach.
*
April 3rd, 1960
Nashville, TN
“Ready, Elvis?” the engineer up in the booth buzzes in over the com.
“Yeah,” he replies, shooting you a cheeky smile and a waggle of his eyebrows as he steps up to the mic.
You roll your eyes back at him, trying not to show just how much you are appreciating his presence. The secrets you two now share have matured him. You can’t help but worry about the dark circles rimming his eyes, though it is a bit unfair how it somehow only enhances his handsomeness.
Even so, he has been remarkably steadied and attentive these past few days, considering everything going on.
It is a godsend for you. Your nerves are fraying at the edges and more than ever, you want a cigarette, but you know Elvis won’t have it. Considering what he’s doing for you and this baby, you are happy to oblige him on this, despite your cravings.
With everything you’ve gone through in your life, you pride yourself on moving through adversity—for surviving as best you can—without falling apart. But since you returned from Florida, all bets have been off.
Along with putting on the performance of a lifetime in hiding your pregnancy, you’ve also needed to play the gleeful fiancée—a role that hardly feels natural for you, even if your relationship wasn’t a farce. A thousand other girls would be beside themselves to take your place, but for you it’s different. It’s like the ground is constantly moving underneath your feet and you are holding on for dear life, trying to stay upright.
It doesn’t help that your feelings for Elvis are rapidly slipping out of your control. While his poor behavior in Florida tempered them by the time you arrived back in Tennessee, his gallant actions since then, coupled with your exhaustion, have blurred the lines completely. Every touch, every knowing glance, every concerned look sends a cascade of tingles through your body.
You want to blame the pregnancy, you really do, but you aren’t sure you can at this point. Each sliver of attention and affection from him is peeling away the armor you’ve got around your heart, and you don’t have the mental or physical energy to keep rebuilding it.
It’s a recipe for getting your heart broken.
Your fingers twist nervously, still unused to the engagement ring now on your left hand. After telling him about Gianni’s gaudy monstrosity, you’d begged Elvis to keep it simple; he’d reminded you he has a standard to uphold. The compromise was a stunning ring with three large, round stones—a diamond in the middle, with blue sapphires on either side, surrounded by smaller baguette and single cut diamonds in a white gold setting.
You wanted to hate it, solely for its extravagance, but when he had shown you the piece ahead of the “surprise” proposal you both had planned for after dinner last night, you couldn’t drudge up an ounce of dislike. He’d looked so concerned about pleasing you, telling you over and over he could take it back if you didn’t like it, but frankly, it was one of the most beautiful pieces of jewelry you’d ever laid eyes on. It was elegant and sparkling, and the uniqueness of the sapphires set it apart. It didn’t take much acting to “ooh” and “ahh” when he’d gently placed it on your finger in front of his friends and family, cementing the reality of this strange situation. A flock of butterflies had erupted in your stomach as though he really had proposed, like the proud but blushing smile on his face was really because of his love for you and not an act.
Your ring catches your eye for the millionth time today and the sapphires suddenly remind you of Elvis’ eyes. How deep and endless they seem. There is no stopping the flipping of your heart.
Oh, Madone, it’s just a ring, you chide yourself. But it doesn’t stop you from twisting it around your finger again and again like a touchstone.
After a bit of back and forth, a heavy bass line and rhythmic snapping starts, jerking your attention to Elvis. The stripped-down jazzy sound is immediately recognizable—a Peggy Lee hit from a few years ago. Your brow quirks in surprise.
The slow grin spreading across Elvis’ face is sinful as he sinks into the music.
He wanted you in the studio from the start this time around, citing you as his “good luck charm.” Part of you balked at that. The other part was flattered. After the last two times you’d watched him come alive while performing, something deep inside you awakens right alongside the beat, scaring you in its intensity.
Never know how much I love you, never know how much I care…
He starts singing. It’s quiet and deceptively relaxed, but you know him well enough now to understand he’s a live wire under it all. And that makes it even more enticing when he locks his eyes on yours, singing the words directly to you.
You give me fever…
His voice skitters across your skin, lighting fires as it goes. After the beat drops, his limbs shiver with the drums and the movement feels directly connected to the shiver running down your spine.
And he’s just warming up.
Every line, coupled with the sultry timbre of his voice, drowns you further into the depths of his eyes. They don’t let you go for the entirety of the first take. Your face is flaming, your hands gripping the edge of your seat because it feels like he’s about to eat you alive.
Madre di Dio…you’d let him. Willingly.
He wakes out of the spell he’s seemingly cast partway through the second take. You watch him whistle and blink a few times, coming back to himself. He’s slightly more unsure through the third, but regains his original focus by the fourth, sliding into the take like he’s been singing the song his whole life.
You can’t help but feel this is an intimate moment you shouldn’t be privy to, when he homes in on you once again. You are barely breathing the entire last take, a throbbing pulse consuming your heart along with your belly, something liquid and warm heating the core of you.
When he grits out: When her daddy tried to kill him, she said ‘Daddy, oh don’t you dare’, you hold back a gasp, wanting desperately to squirm in your seat to relieve some of the pressure in your body you don’t have any idea what to do with.
Perhaps it is because the line hits so close to your own experience, but it is as if he’s channeling you. Or channeling into you. You aren’t sure anymore, other that you are combusting from the inside out by the end of the song.
What a lovely way to burn… he repeats again and again, and trails off, finally.
Indeed.
He comes out of his near-trancelike state, bringing you with him and you are suddenly not at all sure you’ll make it through the next few days of recording.
How did you forget what happened last time you were in this room with him? With everything that had happened since, you suppose it’s not that outlandish, but those feelings of want, of need, seep back into your bloodstream just like the last time he sang to you in Miami, and here in this very room just a few weeks ago.
Seems like a lifetime ago…
Forcing yourself to breathe, you think maybe you’ll have a reprieve with the next song, but the bluesy Like a Baby is so sultry it does absolutely nothing to quell the fire in your veins. It doesn’t help he looks positively proud of himself every time he drinks you in, gauging your reaction, with every word he sings to you.
The seductive quality of it all is so overwhelming you need to excuse yourself to the restroom the moment the final take is cut. You clutch your trembling hands, splashing cool water across your rosy cheeks.
Get it together, Lori. He’s just doing his job.
Letting out a shuddering breath, you feel an unusual slickness between your thighs that sends your heartrate skyrocketing.
Oh, God—the baby.
Frantically, you hoist your skirt, pull down your stockings, and examine your underwear for any sign of blood. Panic slices through you until you discover you aren’t bleeding or miscarrying—it’s only a clear, slick discharge you’ve not had before. Something hormonal, no doubt, due to the changes in your body.
Then you realize you are relieved.
Your heart stutters.
You’re not sure you should be relieved. If this pregnancy ended naturally, it would save all of you a heap of trouble. It would mean you might be able to put the memory of Gianni’s cruelty behind you. It would mean Elvis wouldn’t have to settle for you. You could break off the engagement easily enough at this point.
But the thought of losing the baby, of losing Elvis, makes your heart ache so much tears spring to your eyes.
Oh, no. Oh, no, no, no.
You can’t want to actually marry Elvis. You barely know him. God knows you don’t feel ready to start a family, especially out of such horrid circumstances.
Then why does the idea of losing it all break your heart?
Sniffling, you look in the mirror and hold back the tears starting to well in your eyes.
It’s just hormones. Your body is just protecting itself and the baby, nothing more, you say in your calm and collected nurse voice. Nothing more.
Because anything more means perhaps your feelings for Elvis have truly gone beyond what you can handle right now.
Scrunching your eyes shut, you pray to understand the purpose of any of this. Why Elvis feels more like home than anywhere else, despite his sometimes infuriating nature. Why he has to be so alluring and charismatic.
Why the thought of being without him is untenable at this point, and not just because of Gianni or the baby.
It’s just a crush—a silly little crush.
No.
He’s all I have, you realize.
Of course, you feel connected to him. Right now, he is consuming your life and drawing out a safe future for the both of you. He is the only one truly in your corner. You may not know him completely, but he has not deserted you or thrown you back to your father. He is deep in this with you.
He could’ve easily fired and discarded you and been right to do so.
But for some reason, he did not.
A shuttering breath makes your chest heave. You can’t bring yourself to examine why that might be and you push away the thing you are most loathe to admit. The thing that makes pretending with him so very difficult, yet so sweet at the same time.
Shaking your head, you wipe your eyes, and straighten your spine. You powder your nose and reapply your lipstick. You put yourself back together, locking up the feelings you are trying so hard to fight.
Looking in the mirror, you see a young woman ready to do what she needs to do to survive.
Ignoring the headache brewing behind your eyes, you paste on a cordial smile and venture back to the studio. The light is on because they are recording, so you sit outside until it flashes off. You stand, brush off your skirt, and reach for the doorknob but it whips open before you can grasp it.
Gasping, your heart leaps in surprise as Elvis fills the doorway, looking a tad frantic.
“Little Bird, are you okay?” he asks, brow furrowed. He grasps your shoulders gently, taking you in as though you might be hurt. He thumbs your chin and looks into your eyes. “You disappeared on me.”
You bite your lip, concealing the smile wanting to appear at the fact he noticed you were gone.
“I was feeling a bit queasy,” you murmur. It’s not a lie, but not the whole truth, either.
The pad of his thumb brushes over your cheek. Your heart thumps and you look down to avoid the intensity of his gaze, lest he see more than you want him to.
“Let’s get you back to the hotel then, darlin’.”
“I’m fine,” you brush him off, “And I won’t leave you. You look tired. How are you feeling?”
The corner of his mouth quirks up. “Don’t think I don’t know you’re tryin’ to change the subject, little one,” he muses. His hands find your waist, burning through your dress. “I am tired. Let’s call it quits for the night.”
Your mouth pops open and your eyes narrow with suspicion. “Has hell frozen over? Elvis, you’ve hardly cut three songs, and the Colonel said—”
“I heard the Colonel, but I’m tellin’ ya it’s time to go.” There’s an edge to his voice, warning you his mood is shifting. “And I’m doin’ what I promised by knowin’ my limits.”
“Okay, I’m just surprised is all. I’m used to you fighting me like a stubborn goat,” you tease, trying to lighten the mood. You can’t discern if he’s doing this for your sake or his, however. Perhaps it doesn’t matter if it gets the job done.
His cheeks are flushed, so you feel his forehead with the back of your hand. “I suppose you do feel a bit warm,” you concede. “Alright, let’s go get some rest, then.”
He nips at your hand playfully as you bring it down, pulling you closer. The flirtation has you blushing and you resist the urge to giggle, rolling your eyes instead. You can’t help but notice there is no one to perform for but remind yourself he’s just an overly affectionate guy. It means nothing.
“Hey, EP, you comin’?” Charlie yells from inside the room.
“Naw, we’re heading out. I’m tired,” Elvis says, giving you a wink.
Charlie sputters but recovers quickly, gathering the group as Elvis entwines his fingers with yours and heads out to the car.
He doesn’t let you go until you arrive back at the hotel, safe in the room you share.
Something is building between you two. You can feel it in the care of his touch, in the warmth filling your chest and your belly with each beat of your heart. It’s in his eyes as he sits on the edge of the bed, releasing the mask he wears for the rest of the world as you check his vitals.
He is tired and a little feverish. You are proud of him for following through on taking better care of himself, even if you think it is because he is looking out for you and not himself. You give him a quick little smile before turning to put away the blood pressure cuff.
“I wish you’d do that more.”
“Do what?” you ask.
“Smile. I don’t think you realize how beautiful you are when you do it,” he says, low and quiet.
It rumbles through you like thunder, your heart skipping a beat. You pay special attention to clasping your bag closed, unable to look at him but feeling the weight of his gaze.
“Elvis—” you whisper.
“I want you to be happy,” he interrupts.
You sigh with the weight of your circumstances pressing on your shoulders, still unable to meet his eyes.
“But I understand why that’s hard right now. I jus’…I-I w-want you to know I’ll do whatever I can to make things easier on ya. Because you deserve to have more of those pretty smiles.”
The clasp of your bag becomes blurry and your throat tight. You clench the leather and force a deep breath. Tilting your head up to blink back the tears, you clear your throat before you can attempt to look at him.
Why does he have to say things like that? It makes it harder to resist the pull you feel towards him. You are teetering on the very edge of being professional and he seems keen to push you over, whether he knows it or not.
“Thank you,” you finally manage out, though so many words linger unsaid on the tip of your tongue. You meet his eyes and fireworks erupt over your skin at the way he looks up at you so openly. The air is sucked out of the room, deathly still, like before a summer thunderstorm. It leaves you buzzing and dizzy.
He stands, slowly, as if not to startle you, and steps forward. With each inch closer he gets, the air shifts, beginning to crackle with electricity. Your heart gallops faster. If he touches you, you are done for, you just know it. The lightning burning bright inside of him has the power to wreak irrevocable havoc on you. And you cannot afford to let your feelings get in the way of your survival because when he breaks your heart, which you know he will, you will have nowhere to go.
You have the baby to think of now. It is easier to sit in the discomfort of your complicated feelings than in the pain of the inevitable heartbreak that will come when he realizes you’re just like any of his other women—you’re replaceable, at least romantically. And God knows you’ve had too much pain in your life related to the whims of men to add more.
The air sizzles as he reaches for you, tempting you to burn with his touch. Part of you wants to burn—the deep heat swirling unbidden low in your belly dares you to let him—but you jump back out of instinct.
“I-I should get ready for bed,” you stutter, racing to your suitcase to grab your nightgown before hightailing it to the bathroom and slamming the door harder than you intended. You think you hear him chuckle as you lean back on the door to catch your breath.
Your body shakes but not out of fear of him. No, it’s like you’ve refused it something vital and it quakes with the need of release. Like the crack of lightning in him would bring the relief of rain, cutting the heat between you.
It doesn’t make sense. You’ve never felt this before, but you know it is dangerous. Lightning is beautiful but deadly, after all.
As you stumble your way through your bedtime routine, you realize in a few short days, the storm of a man out there will be your husband. And one more boundary between you you’ve relied on to keep you on solid ground will be gone.
And one look in the mirror at the exhaustion lining your features, you wonder if it is too late; perhaps the coming storm is inevitable and will tear you to pieces no matter what you do.
There are worse ways to perish than in the arms of Elvis Presley.
*
The swell of electricity doesn’t go away. It abates some, at times, but your body is hellbent and hyperaware of Elvis’ every move, of every breath he takes.
You desperately want to blame your job—you’re supposed to be observant of him, after all—or the changes in your body because of the baby, but the waves of rolling thunder build under your skin despite the physical space he is trying to give you.
The marathon of a session on Monday does not make things better. You’d hoped it would be a distraction. He needs to be completely focused to bang out at least nine more songs to finish the album. There will be no time for anything but music.
Except you somehow forget music fuels him and makes him glow from the inside out. Instead of dissipating, the storm just builds and builds, like wild thunderheads in the sky. He lives each song so completely, expertly maneuvering through mournful ballads and bouncing pop and raunchy blues like he was born to do. It’s mind-bending and alluring, and every time he draws you in, it feels like he’s singing directly to you, about you.
He's enjoying himself, despite the long hours. Completely in his element. And electricity zings though your body during the playful moans at the end of Such a Night. By the Thrill of Your Love, you think you might combust.
And he knows it, by the sparkle in his eyes and the pull of his defiant but tempting upper lip. He wasn’t offended by the boundary you set last night in the slightest, giving you the physical space you desperately needed unless needed to keep up the ruse of your engagement. But everything he does, every lyric he sings, every twitch of his body, makes you feel as though you are swirling out of control. The more he respects your need for physical space, the more you want him to box you in.
He's doing just that, just not with his body.
You are completely on edge when not absorbed in his performance and technique. God, what an idiot you were to think he wasn’t talented. His stint in Germany only served to strengthen his craft. The world isn’t ready for this new and improved Elvis. Girls will be beside themselves.
You just never thought you’d be one of them.
By the time he gets to the last song, he can’t stave off how tired he’s getting. The marathon session has taken all night and into the dawn. He lets everyone know he’s not entirely convinced he should even sing this Are You Lonesome Tonight? but the Colonel, along with Steve, the RCA rep, press him.
Worry for Elvis’ wellbeing has you voicing your concern, but the men look at you as if you are a silly little girl and not a professional. It takes a moment to remember the only one who really knows your role here is Parker, and despite nearly being asleep on your feet, you are ready to go toe to toe with him. Elvis concedes to his manager, however, before shooting you a look and running his hands down your arms to placate you. The long touch of him distracts you enough to lessen your annoyance for the moment.
This last song is the only time he kicks you out of the room, along with everyone except the musicians, but you manage to sneak into the booth to listen. You can’t see anything through the window because he’s ordered all the lights be turned off, but the result has goosebumps rising all over your body with the emotionally eerie but gentle lilt of his performance.
By the end, tears are streaming unbidden down your cheeks, though you aren’t entirely sure why. You race to wipe your cheeks before the lights pop back on, but he catches your eye through the window and swell of emotion rises again.
You know you are careening quickly towards something beyond your control. The pregnancy is one thing pushing you towards the edge, but this new arrangement with Elvis, the intimacy involved, has your heart racing with both curiosity and fear. It is all so far out of your experience but there is no real choice. It is whatever this new normal is or running for your life.
Being off kilter and filled with feelings you don’t understand is uncomfortable, but you’ll take it versus the alternative, though you can’t help the fear you’ve put Elvis in terrible danger crawling at the edges of your mind.
It’s this that keeps you alert as you all board the bus to head back to Memphis after a quick diner breakfast. Elvis is dying on the vine, the energy of performing all night taking its toll. The darkness around his eyes and the pallor of his skin tells you everything you need to know, but his limbs twitch restlessly all the way home, even when he doses, curled up into you with his head on your shoulder. It’s as if he can’t shut it off even when he is completely drained.
It’s too much for him. Your anxiety builds and builds in the hours it takes to return to Graceland. You are worrying your lips raw between your concern for him and the position you’ve put him in. Guilt swirls in your stomach, making your carsickness worse.
On top of it, your body is desperate to be close to him, as though his presence is a balm to your burdens, but those feelings just bring more confusion. You relish the tickle of his long, soft hair against your jaw and the way his fingers interweave with yours, even in sleep. Despite how ready you were to leave mere days ago, you aren’t quite sure you could do so now without damaging a part of yourself you didn’t know existed.
It frightens you, but the tingle that zings down your arms and into your palm lets you know it is exhilarating, too.
The bus is quiet of its usual boisterousness when it pulls through the gates of Graceland in the early afternoon. It is hard to believe how much everything has changed in a few short days, since the last time you arrived like this.
“Elvis,” you whisper, but he barely stirs. His eyes are closed, and his full lips are open slightly, giving him an air of innocence that tugs at your heart. “Elvis, sweetheart, we’re home.”
Sweetheart? Madone, where did that come from? You blush at your use of the endearment, not having used it since your brothers were little boys and certainly never with a man.
Elvis sputters and his long eyelashes flutter open as he stretches his long arms. “Mmm, ‘sweetheart,’ huh?” he murmurs, his lips turning up in a small, sleepy smile.
“I—you must have dreamed that,” you reply, flustered, but you know your pink cheeks and the way you twist your ring give you away.
He just grins. “You can call me sweetheart all day, Little Bird.” Then, he pulls you down for a sweet, chaste kiss, which surprises you. He tastes of sleep and coffee and chewing gum. The kiss is quick but sends a tremble through you all the same, especially since the bus is nearly empty.
When he pulls back and takes a look at you, his eyes fill with concern. He runs his thumb under your eye, as though he could wipe away the darkness you know is there. “Did you sleep at all, baby?”
You shake your head no, trying to brush him off by getting up to walk away, but he stands and grabs your arm. Pulling you back gently, he wraps his arms around your middle. You give up trying to wiggle away—he’s stronger than you. You’re surprised to find you don’t mind it. If it were any other man, you’d be panicking at the closeness, but it seems you’ve grown used to Elvis’ near constant displays of physical affection.
“I’m fine, Elvis. Let’s go inside.”
“Little one, the doc said you need sleep…”
His vacillation through pet names and endearments should annoy you, but they don’t. Not anymore. You sigh.
“…and you’re gettin’ married tomorrow. You need ta look your best for your husband,” he says, waggling his eyebrows.
Rolling your eyes at his silliness, you try and mask the surprising buzz of excitement running through your limbs at the reality that in a day you will be married to this exasperatingly handsome and talented mess of a man. It’s overwhelming and a little exhilarating, but you can feel exhaustion pulling at you, knowing you’ll be knee deep in preparations in a few short hours.
You resist the urge to lay your head on his shoulder, but he senses your resignation in the way your body deflates. It’s hard, you realize, to let anyone else take care of you.
“How ‘bout I rest with you? Will you at least try to take a nap then?” If he’s conceding to more rest, you know you must look worse for the wear. But it does the trick.
“Alright, fine. I will rest if you do, too,” you concede.
Being back at Graceland—back home—helps you relax more. No one can get to you or Elvis here. You fear you won’t be able to sleep, but once your head hits the pillow, Elvis safe and resting inches away, you slide into the dreamless dark.
Thank you so much for your patience as I got this up on different platforms due to unforeseen life crap! 💗 Okay, so Chapter 11 got a bit away from me length wise, so for sanity's sake (and so I can make some more revisions to some much-anticipated sexy times 🤭), I am posting part one of the chapter instead of making y'all wait any longer.
Some major, life-altering things went down in Chapter 10 and this chapter from Lori's perspective deals with a bit of the reality and consequences of that. (You can refresh your memory here if you need to!) We jump back in the next morning. She's got A LOT of feels going on in this chapter leading into some more twists and turns in 11.2, so the ending of this might feel a bit abrupt since it will all be part of the same chapter. Sorry!
Also, please excuse my alterations of some of the recording dates a bit to serve the story!
Anyway, as always. I can't wait to hear what you think! 💋
Loves and kisses, Madi xoxoxoxo 💗
TW: So many angsty feels, the Colonel, pregnancy and related symptoms, fear of miscarriage, Elvis and his endless PDA...smut to come in part 2 🤭
Broken Glass Chapter 11.1
“You’re what?!”
You wince at the way Tom Parker spits the words out, his shock and ire so palpable it feels like a slap to the face. The anxiousness skyrocketing through you, paired with the rapid beat of your heart knocking against your ribs, leaves you unable to look at the man, but you know he’s furious.
“We’re getting married. As soon as possible,” Elvis repeats firmly, grabbing your hand and squeezing. It seems unconscious the way he steps slightly in front of you, as if shielding you from the older man’s anger. You appreciate the gesture. No one, save for your mother, has ever protected you.
Elvis sounds so steadfast and sure about all of it. He’s a better actor than people give him credit for, but this performance is going above and beyond anything you’d assumed he was capable of.
Or maybe he means it.
Your heart flips, just the way it did last night when he asked you to marry him.
The last 24 hours have gone and changed everything so quickly that your head is still spinning. The moment when Elvis kneeled on the bathroom floor with you, wiped away your sick, and offered to fix everything, it felt so very real. There wasn’t an ounce of hesitation in his eyes.
And despite it being an arrangement born out of necessity and not love, it was nothing like Gianni’s horrific proposal.
Your stomach turns at the memory of that nightmare before Parker’s voice cuts through, bringing you back to the task at hand.
“What in God’s name has gotten into you, boy?” The beady-eyed man glares around Elvis’ broad shoulders at you. You resist the urge to shiver under his accusatory gaze. “Did you threaten to go to the press, young lady? Is this about money?”
“Hey, now, Colonel,” Elvis says, deceptively calm, but his voice is low with warning. “It’s not like that at all. And you best mind your tone.”
Parker’s eyes flicker to Elvis with an edge of surprise, taking in Elvis’ protective stance and words in silence. You get the impression Elvis hasn’t stood up to the man before, not like this, anyhow. The crackle of tension in the air has you all on edge.
The older man’s eyes narrow shrewdly, and you worry you won’t be able to pull this off. You’ve observed enough in the last month to understand the influence he has over Elvis, the slight manipulations he wields, pushing Elvis right where he wants him.
Parker looks at you with scrutiny. He takes you in from head to toe. Your breath catches in your throat and you want nothing more than to disappear and pretend the last day was a dream. But you cannot. Forcing yourself to hold his stare, you remind yourself of everything at stake here.
There is no doubt in your mind he will throw you to the wolves the moment he senses anything amiss, the moment you threaten the image of his star client. So it has to be crystal clear you are here to stay, even though it makes you sick to lie.
But there are much worse things than white lies waiting for you out in the world. And as heartbroken and shocked as you are about this baby, you already know you’ll do anything to protect it.
You aren’t even conscious of the way your hand splays over your stomach, not until Parker’s eyes freeze there. His eyes snap up to yours and then to Elvis.
“Oh, you didn’t,” Parker groans. “Christ, I picked this one specifically because I thought she was smart enough not to fall into bed with you the minute you two were alone. Turns out she’s smarter than I gave her credit for—she managed to ensnare you and ensure she’d always be tied to Elvis Presley,” he spits.
Your cheeks flame hot with the accusation, and you can’t hold back your gasp at his insinuation, even though it shouldn’t be a surprise.
Elvis squeezes your hand tight and points at Parker, his eyes stormy and livid. “Don’t you dare blame her for this! On the train, you made it clear how she needed to improve her ‘attitude’ towards me and I told ya not to worry. Well, I took care of it,” he shrugs flippantly.
You try not to gape at his blasé attitude, wanting to trust Elvis to do what he needs to make this convincing.
“You damn well know I didn’t mean ‘get her pregnant’!” Parker hisses. “And we had this talk when you were just starting out! I know you know better than to—”
“I’m in love with her,” Elvis interrupts with such conviction your stomach swoops and you need to school your face to look like you aren’t amazed by how truthful his statement sounds. The earnestness on his handsome face takes your breath away.
Tom looks sorry for him. “Oh, son, we both know how easily you fall in love. But I don’t think you understand the gravity or responsibility of starting a family. What it’ll do to your image. Girls want you unattached and available, and they’re the ones buying the records."
From anyone else, it might be imbued with caring and concern, but coming from Parker, it is backhanded and insulting with the way he talks down to Elvis, as though he were still a 19-year-old kid instead of a 25-year-old man. But he does it with the finesse of a snake charmer.
You watch Elvis carefully as he recoils a bit, an innocence flashing over his features you’ve only seen in his most vulnerable moments making a quick appearance. For a second, you are terrified he’ll cave and you’ll have to pack your bags and head West after all. Thankfully, he blinks it away, steeling himself with the stubbornness which usually drives you crazy but just might work in your favor today.
“We’re in love. We’re gettin’ married, and that’s all there is to it.” It comes out as a growl and the sound reaches down to your toes.
Parker shakes his head, grasping at anything to control his client. There’s a carefully veiled desperation in his voice which barely conceals the threat he now lobs at Elvis: “This’ll ruin you, boy! What will your father do when the money is gone, hmm? Your cousins? Your friends? That big house you bought your mother? It’ll all be gone.”
Elvis looks as though he’s been slapped. But not you. Life has made you good at reading people, at seeing through men like this. Perhaps it is the fact you are running on adrenaline or because you have so much to lose, but you find yourself furious at Parker for speaking this way to Elvis.
“And after everything I’ve done to ensure your success, you’d throw it all away for—”
“How?” You barely register you’ve spoken until Parker’s glare lands on you.
Elvis looks down at you with surprise. It wasn’t part of the plan for you to interject; Elvis thought he could handle Parker on his own.
“How exactly will getting married and having a family ‘ruin’ him? Last I checked, you weren’t a young woman. How do you know it won’t help him? His audience is growing up and getting married, so why can’t he?” you say, a fierceness you usually rely on at work slicing through your nervousness.
“Young lady, you best shut your mouth before you get yourself in more trouble than you’re already in,” Parker seethes.
“You don’t talk to her that way!” Elvis yells, stepping in front of her, pointing in the older man’s face.
Parker looks taken aback, and you wonder if Elvis has ever stood up for himself the way he’s standing up for you now.
Your heart beats in double time, but you gently put your hand on Elvis’ arm to bring it down. His eyes are blazing but they catch yours and you breathe in slowly, hoping he follows your lead. Once he doesn’t look like he’s going to launch himself at Parker, you speak.
“I was going to be around for the foreseeable future anyhow, isn’t that right? Perhaps much longer based on what the doctor said,” you say, miraculously keeping the tremble out of your voice. “It is easier—and more proper—to explain a wife being by his side than a long-term girlfriend living in his house, yes?”
Parker scoffs but doesn’t speak.
“And there’s nothing more young ladies like me want more than weddings and babies, even more so when the groom is the most handsome and charismatic man on the planet, one they want the best for. They will look at pictures of us and imagine themselves as me, I’d bet. And the men will be much less threatened by the family man who served his country and might come around, too,” you continue with fervor, surprised at how easy it is to be assertive when it’s Elvis you are fighting for.
“It doesn’t matter if he is married or has a thousand babies, Mr. Parker. As long as Elvis is alive and keeps doing what he was born to do, they will flock to him because he is an incredibly talented, gorgeous, and kind man. My being by his side won’t change that one little bit. In fact, a wedding will be free publicity for his comeback album, I’d imagine.”
A breath wooshes out of you now your speech is finished. Your fists squeeze to hide the tremor in your hands. Silence hangs heavy and you shift uncomfortably on your feet, but you force yourself to hold Parker’s eyes.
At first, he looks at you with something akin to shock, which quickly morphs into a smirk as he throws a cigar in his mouth, considering your words, perhaps. He holds the silence and your gaze much longer than he should, and you know it’s a show of dominance. You’ve seen a similar look on the men in la famiglia when they seek to intimidate.
It equally makes you want to stand your ground and shirk back into the woodwork. You don’t want him to win, but you also know you must play a role here, and a man like him will want any good idea to seem like his own. You lower your eyes in faux deference.
“Well, Elvis, we may be able to salvage this yet,” Parker purrs, gumming the end of the cigar.
Elvis’ eyes haven’t left you since your speech—you know because you feel them boring into you—but it’s not until you look back up at those depthless blues that you see the unabashed way he’s staring.
He looks at you like he’s smitten. Like you are everything he could ever need. And he’s blushing as if bashful about what you said. His movie star gaze pins you to the spot, with his bedroom eyes at half-mast and his full lips falling open like he’s going to say something.
You would love to be able to say it didn’t make your heart flip over and your knees a little weak to be looked at like this by him; in fact, you are going to chalk it up to your hormones because this is all part of the act, you are sure.
It’s almost painful, the way you tear your eyes away from him to look at your shoes. Suddenly you are winded and exhausted.
He’s just a patient. Maybe even a friend after everything you’ve been through together this past month. A better actor than anyone gives him credit for.
Madone, I will not swoon over a man just because he’s good at pretending he loves me.
Elvis may have acted like a spoiled, sullen child the days prior to arriving back at Graceland, but you’d never in your life seen had a man so entirely consumed with your wellbeing once he knew something was wrong with you. No man had ever treated you with such care.
A swell of emotion sits like a lump in your throat when you think about his proposal. What he’s giving up to save you. To save your baby.
And he’s been so earnest it makes it hard to compartmentalize the fact this arrangement is a quid pro quo and not some romantic folly. Your mind knows this, but your heart is having trouble keeping up. It doesn’t help when he is looking at you like you hung the moon. Like you are precious and beautiful. Like you matter.
You clear your throat and look away, feeling the blush spread across your cheeks. Then, a wave of overwhelm threatens to consume you. Everything in your world has been upended in the last 24 hours, and on top of that, you still have a job to do, yet your body is fighting you every step of the way.
Pregnant.
Your stomach lurches, but you swallow the toast you’d managed to eat earlier back down. Now is not a moment to appear weak by losing your breakfast all over the floor.
Parker is sizing up the both of you, chewing on the end of his cigar like a cow chewing on cud. It makes you want to squirm, yet you force yourself to remain still.
Elvis grips your hand reassuringly, sensing your discomfort. “It’s early, so that means we should do this as soon as possible, yeah?” He says it as if asking, as if the two of you hadn’t already decided it. You can’t quite tell if he’s asking for approval or if he’s smart enough to know it will go over better if the old man thinks it’s his decision. Either way, it seems to work.
“Mmm, yes. Though some are already going to assume the reason based on your impatience,” Parker counters, pointing at your belly.
“Let ‘em think what they want. But I want it public. I want everyone to know who I’m spendin’ the rest of my life with,” Elvis says definitively.
Parker looks at him and narrows his eyes. “Are you sure, my boy? It’s quite the gamble.”
“Didn’t get where we are by always playin’ safe, did we, Colonel?” Elvis counters.
“Hmm, I suppose not,” he replies after another long moment of scrutiny, “and I know you like to charge ahead without looking, but if we give them too much at once, they might be too ravenous. And we must control the narrative.”
Parker looks at your hand. “Get her a pretty ring, then go out and about and be seen. Tell your boys, your family, but no one else. Let them start talking.” His mind starts whirring, you can tell by the gleam in his eye. “We’ll sell an exclusive to the highest bidder, with terms to run the story along with the release of the album. We’ll push the release up, but that means you need to get up to Nashville in the next few days and finish cutting the record. With singles, RCA is going to need…” He pauses to do the math. “At least 11 or 12 more songs to have enough. You think you can do that, son? With everything going on?” The challenge is clear, but you are surprised to hear concern in his voice, too. Elvis is an ill man, after all, despite how gallant he is.
Elvis nods. “Yessir, I’ll get it done.” There isn’t a lick of doubt in his words.
You, however, are worried it’ll be too much for him. It’s a lot of pressure for anyone on a good day, but for Elvis, this could be dangerous. He’s already been pushing himself to the limit with his childish behavior in Florida. You want to say as much, but Elvis must know what you are thinking because he shoots you a stern look before you can get the words out of your mouth.
“Well, then, when you get back, we’ll have a small ceremony at Graceland. A church wedding is out of the question. Safety, timing, you understand,” Parker adds, shooting you a look like he’s sorry when you both know he is anything but.
You swallow and nod, but a snake of disappointment runs through you, nevertheless. You’d been raised to expect a Catholic ceremony but realize it wouldn’t be possible anyway. Elvis isn’t Catholic. In fact, you aren’t sure what religion Elvis is. The fact you don’t know sinks in your gut.
There is so much you don’t know about the man you’re about to marry.
But he’s not Gianni, you think. And he’s willing and able to give my baby the life it deserves.
And that is enough. It has got to be. Arranged marriages still happen every day—this is no different. A love match was never in the cards for you anyway. Not with your father and Gianni in the picture.
He may drive you crazy at times, but at least with Elvis, you and the baby will be safe and cared for.
You’ll just have to quell any expectations he will see you as more than his nurse. Or more than one of the many girls just passing through.
I shouldn’t have kissed him last night.
You blush at the memory. It was a moment of weakness, but you’d been so overcome with gratitude, shock and relief, you’d let your emotions get the best of you. It was too revealing, too vulnerable, considering your roller coaster of emotions recently regarding him.
It hadn’t helped he’d kissed you back with such commitment. Like he truly wanted you.
It scared you. But you’d backed away instantly after accepting his proposal, convincing yourself the look in his eyes was nothing more than friendly and then busied yourself with putting your clothes back into his—your—closet. Then you’d used your very real exhaustion as an excuse to go right to bed after that, ignoring the gnawing feeling of want in your heart.
Elvis would never love a woman like you. A woman who’s been chewed up and spit out by horrible men, a far cry from the actress and model beauties he is used to. He is a good man, helping a woman in need out of the kindness of his heart, out of a need of his own self-preservation, but you best keep reminding yourself that pity and helpfulness is not love.
Lest you get too caught up in the fairytale you are spinning for the world, you remind yourself that once things settle down, arrangements will need to be made for him to get his other needs met.
It wouldn’t be the first or last time a powerful, famous man had dalliances, after all. They would just need to be discreet.
The thought makes your heart ache and tears prick at the back of your eyes, though you instantly try to push away the uncomfortable feeling. You don’t have time or energy to waste on such nonsense.
It takes a moment to realize the men have stopped talking and are looking at you as though waiting for a response.
“I’m sorry, what?” you say, shaking off your thoughts.
“I asked if you had any family or girlfriends that could assist you in preparations? You’ll need to get a dress and have any family travel in to be here after you get back from Nashville,” Parker says with a raised brow.
Your heart sinks. “Oh, no. There’s no one,” you say, trying not to sound as full of regret as you feel. The few friends from nursing school you had weren’t close enough to stand with you, and while you’d love to have your brothers come, there is no way to do so without alerting your father. And you feel absolutely sick at the idea of him being anywhere near you or Elvis.
Elvis looks at you with surprise. You hadn’t told him directly about the issues with Pop, but you assume he at least expected you to have friends. It’s pathetic, to be sure, but this was the reason you’d agreed to work for him in the first place. You are alone in the world.
Swallowing thickly, you hold your head high, even so.
Elvis, thankfully, takes your cue. “I’m sure Patsy would love to help,” he says with a gentle smile, pulling you into his side, his hand resting high on your waist. His double first cousin had been kind to you in the interactions you’ve had, so you suppose she will do.
You nod in response, hyperaware of the warmth of his hand radiating through your dress. It steadies you, tingling the skin beneath, and his closeness is a welcome anchor in this uncharted territory.
“Well, then, by this time next week, you’ll be newlyweds. I trust you’ll be able to continue to take care of Elvis despite your condition, Miss Cannava?” Parker asks under a veil of concern, but the accusation is palpable.
“I have no intention of shirking my duties, Mr. Parker. I want Elvis to be as healthy as possible.”
“Please, call me Colonel,” he says, an edge in his tone that lets you know your refusal to call him Colonel annoys him. But as much as you want to rub it in, you know you need him on your side.
“Of course, Colonel,” you respond, forcing a smile on your face. “And know I’ll continue to do whatever it takes to help Elvis keep doing what he wants to do.”
You swallow down the threat, adding to your already churning stomach.
*
April 3rd, 1960
Nashville, TN
“Ready, Elvis?” the engineer up in the booth buzzes in over the com.
“Yeah,” he replies, shooting you a cheeky smile and a waggle of his eyebrows as he steps up to the mic.
You roll your eyes back at him, trying not to show just how much you are appreciating his presence. The secrets you two now share have matured him. You can’t help but worry about the dark circles rimming his eyes, though it is a bit unfair how it somehow only enhances his handsomeness.
Even so, he has been remarkably steadied and attentive these past few days, considering everything going on.
It is a godsend for you. Your nerves are fraying at the edges and more than ever, you want a cigarette, but you know Elvis won’t have it. Considering what he’s doing for you and this baby, you are happy to oblige him on this, despite your cravings.
With everything you’ve gone through in your life, you pride yourself on moving through adversity—for surviving as best you can—without falling apart. But since you returned from Florida, all bets have been off.
Along with putting on the performance of a lifetime in hiding your pregnancy, you’ve also needed to play the gleeful fiancée—a role that hardly feels natural for you, even if your relationship wasn’t a farce. A thousand other girls would be beside themselves to take your place, but for you it’s different. It’s like the ground is constantly moving underneath your feet and you are holding on for dear life, trying to stay upright.
It doesn’t help that your feelings for Elvis are rapidly slipping out of your control. While his poor behavior in Florida tempered them by the time you arrived back in Tennessee, his gallant actions since then, coupled with your exhaustion, have blurred the lines completely. Every touch, every knowing glance, every concerned look sends a cascade of tingles through your body.
You want to blame the pregnancy, you really do, but you aren’t sure you can at this point. Each sliver of attention and affection from him is peeling away the armor you’ve got around your heart, and you don’t have the mental or physical energy to keep rebuilding it.
It’s a recipe for getting your heart broken.
Your fingers twist nervously, still unused to the engagement ring now on your left hand. After telling him about Gianni’s gaudy monstrosity, you’d begged Elvis to keep it simple; he’d reminded you he has a standard to uphold. The compromise was a stunning ring with three large, round stones—a diamond in the middle, with blue sapphires on either side, surrounded by smaller baguette and single cut diamonds in a white gold setting.
You wanted to hate it, solely for its extravagance, but when he had shown you the piece ahead of the “surprise” proposal you both had planned for after dinner last night, you couldn’t drudge up an ounce of dislike. He’d looked so concerned about pleasing you, telling you over and over he could take it back if you didn’t like it, but frankly, it was one of the most beautiful pieces of jewelry you’d ever laid eyes on. It was elegant and sparkling, and the uniqueness of the sapphires set it apart. It didn’t take much acting to “ooh” and “ahh” when he’d gently placed it on your finger in front of his friends and family, cementing the reality of this strange situation. A flock of butterflies had erupted in your stomach as though he really had proposed, like the proud but blushing smile on his face was really because of his love for you and not an act.
Your ring catches your eye for the millionth time today and the sapphires suddenly remind you of Elvis’ eyes. How deep and endless they seem. There is no stopping the flipping of your heart.
Oh, Madone, it’s just a ring, you chide yourself. But it doesn’t stop you from twisting it around your finger again and again like a touchstone.
After a bit of back and forth, a heavy bass line and rhythmic snapping starts, jerking your attention to Elvis. The stripped-down jazzy sound is immediately recognizable—a Peggy Lee hit from a few years ago. Your brow quirks in surprise.
The slow grin spreading across Elvis’ face is sinful as he sinks into the music.
He wanted you in the studio from the start this time around, citing you as his “good luck charm.” Part of you balked at that. The other part was flattered. After the last two times you’d watched him come alive while performing, something deep inside you awakens right alongside the beat, scaring you in its intensity.
Never know how much I love you, never know how much I care…
He starts singing. It’s quiet and deceptively relaxed, but you know him well enough now to understand he’s a live wire under it all. And that makes it even more enticing when he locks his eyes on yours, singing the words directly to you.
You give me fever…
His voice skitters across your skin, lighting fires as it goes. After the beat drops, his limbs shiver with the drums and the movement feels directly connected to the shiver running down your spine.
And he’s just warming up.
Every line, coupled with the sultry timbre of his voice, drowns you further into the depths of his eyes. They don’t let you go for the entirety of the first take. Your face is flaming, your hands gripping the edge of your seat because it feels like he’s about to eat you alive.
Madre di Dio…you’d let him. Willingly.
He wakes out of the spell he’s seemingly cast partway through the second take. You watch him whistle and blink a few times, coming back to himself. He’s slightly more unsure through the third, but regains his original focus by the fourth, sliding into the take like he’s been singing the song his whole life.
You can’t help but feel this is an intimate moment you shouldn’t be privy to, when he homes in on you once again. You are barely breathing the entire last take, a throbbing pulse consuming your heart along with your belly, something liquid and warm heating the core of you.
When he grits out: When her daddy tried to kill him, she said ‘Daddy, oh don’t you dare’, you hold back a gasp, wanting desperately to squirm in your seat to relieve some of the pressure in your body you don’t have any idea what to do with.
Perhaps it is because the line hits so close to your own experience, but it is as if he’s channeling you. Or channeling into you. You aren’t sure anymore, other that you are combusting from the inside out by the end of the song.
What a lovely way to burn… he repeats again and again, and trails off, finally.
Indeed.
He comes out of his near-trancelike state, bringing you with him and you are suddenly not at all sure you’ll make it through the next few days of recording.
How did you forget what happened last time you were in this room with him? With everything that had happened since, you suppose it’s not that outlandish, but those feelings of want, of need, seep back into your bloodstream just like the last time he sang to you in Miami, and here in this very room just a few weeks ago.
Seems like a lifetime ago…
Forcing yourself to breathe, you think maybe you’ll have a reprieve with the next song, but the bluesy Like a Baby is so sultry it does absolutely nothing to quell the fire in your veins. It doesn’t help he looks positively proud of himself every time he drinks you in, gauging your reaction, with every word he sings to you.
The seductive quality of it all is so overwhelming you need to excuse yourself to the restroom the moment the final take is cut. You clutch your trembling hands, splashing cool water across your rosy cheeks.
Get it together, Lori. He’s just doing his job.
Letting out a shuddering breath, you feel an unusual slickness between your thighs that sends your heartrate skyrocketing.
Oh, God—the baby.
Frantically, you hoist your skirt, pull down your stockings, and examine your underwear for any sign of blood. Panic slices through you until you discover you aren’t bleeding or miscarrying—it’s only a clear, slick discharge you’ve not had before. Something hormonal, no doubt, due to the changes in your body.
Then you realize you are relieved.
Your heart stutters.
You’re not sure you should be relieved. If this pregnancy ended naturally, it would save all of you a heap of trouble. It would mean you might be able to put the memory of Gianni’s cruelty behind you. It would mean Elvis wouldn’t have to settle for you. You could break off the engagement easily enough at this point.
But the thought of losing the baby, of losing Elvis, makes your heart ache so much tears spring to your eyes.
Oh, no. Oh, no, no, no.
You can’t want to actually marry Elvis. You barely know him. God knows you don’t feel ready to start a family, especially out of such horrid circumstances.
Then why does the idea of losing it all break your heart?
Sniffling, you look in the mirror and hold back the tears starting to well in your eyes.
It’s just hormones. Your body is just protecting itself and the baby, nothing more, you say in your calm and collected nurse voice. Nothing more.
Because anything more means perhaps your feelings for Elvis have truly gone beyond what you can handle right now.
Scrunching your eyes shut, you pray to understand the purpose of any of this. Why Elvis feels more like home than anywhere else, despite his sometimes infuriating nature. Why he has to be so alluring and charismatic.
Why the thought of being without him is untenable at this point, and not just because of Gianni or the baby.
It’s just a crush—a silly little crush.
No.
He’s all I have, you realize.
Of course, you feel connected to him. Right now, he is consuming your life and drawing out a safe future for the both of you. He is the only one truly in your corner. You may not know him completely, but he has not deserted you or thrown you back to your father. He is deep in this with you.
He could’ve easily fired and discarded you and been right to do so.
But for some reason, he did not.
A shuttering breath makes your chest heave. You can’t bring yourself to examine why that might be and you push away the thing you are most loathe to admit. The thing that makes pretending with him so very difficult, yet so sweet at the same time.
Shaking your head, you wipe your eyes, and straighten your spine. You powder your nose and reapply your lipstick. You put yourself back together, locking up the feelings you are trying so hard to fight.
Looking in the mirror, you see a young woman ready to do what she needs to do to survive.
Ignoring the headache brewing behind your eyes, you paste on a cordial smile and venture back to the studio. The light is on because they are recording, so you sit outside until it flashes off. You stand, brush off your skirt, and reach for the doorknob but it whips open before you can grasp it.
Gasping, your heart leaps in surprise as Elvis fills the doorway, looking a tad frantic.
“Little Bird, are you okay?” he asks, brow furrowed. He grasps your shoulders gently, taking you in as though you might be hurt. He thumbs your chin and looks into your eyes. “You disappeared on me.”
You bite your lip, concealing the smile wanting to appear at the fact he noticed you were gone.
“I was feeling a bit queasy,” you murmur. It’s not a lie, but not the whole truth, either.
The pad of his thumb brushes over your cheek. Your heart thumps and you look down to avoid the intensity of his gaze, lest he see more than you want him to.
“Let’s get you back to the hotel then, darlin’.”
“I’m fine,” you brush him off, “And I won’t leave you. You look tired. How are you feeling?”
The corner of his mouth quirks up. “Don’t think I don’t know you’re tryin’ to change the subject, little one,” he muses. His hands find your waist, burning through your dress. “I am tired. Let’s call it quits for the night.”
Your mouth pops open and your eyes narrow with suspicion. “Has hell frozen over? Elvis, you’ve hardly cut three songs, and the Colonel said—”
“I heard the Colonel, but I’m tellin’ ya it’s time to go.” There’s an edge to his voice, warning you his mood is shifting. “And I’m doin’ what I promised by knowin’ my limits.”
“Okay, I’m just surprised is all. I’m used to you fighting me like a stubborn goat,” you tease, trying to lighten the mood. You can’t discern if he’s doing this for your sake or his, however. Perhaps it doesn’t matter if it gets the job done.
His cheeks are flushed, so you feel his forehead with the back of your hand. “I suppose you do feel a bit warm,” you concede. “Alright, let’s go get some rest, then.”
He nips at your hand playfully as you bring it down, pulling you closer. The flirtation has you blushing and you resist the urge to giggle, rolling your eyes instead. You can’t help but notice there is no one to perform for but remind yourself he’s just an overly affectionate guy. It means nothing.
“Hey, EP, you comin’?” Charlie yells from inside the room.
“Naw, we’re heading out. I’m tired,” Elvis says, giving you a wink.
Charlie sputters but recovers quickly, gathering the group as Elvis entwines his fingers with yours and heads out to the car.
He doesn’t let you go until you arrive back at the hotel, safe in the room you share.
Something is building between you two. You can feel it in the care of his touch, in the warmth filling your chest and your belly with each beat of your heart. It’s in his eyes as he sits on the edge of the bed, releasing the mask he wears for the rest of the world as you check his vitals.
He is tired and a little feverish. You are proud of him for following through on taking better care of himself, even if you think it is because he is looking out for you and not himself. You give him a quick little smile before turning to put away the blood pressure cuff.
“I wish you’d do that more.”
“Do what?” you ask.
“Smile. I don’t think you realize how beautiful you are when you do it,” he says, low and quiet.
It rumbles through you like thunder, your heart skipping a beat. You pay special attention to clasping your bag closed, unable to look at him but feeling the weight of his gaze.
“Elvis—” you whisper.
“I want you to be happy,” he interrupts.
You sigh with the weight of your circumstances pressing on your shoulders, still unable to meet his eyes.
“But I understand why that’s hard right now. I jus’…I-I w-want you to know I’ll do whatever I can to make things easier on ya. Because you deserve to have more of those pretty smiles.”
The clasp of your bag becomes blurry and your throat tight. You clench the leather and force a deep breath. Tilting your head up to blink back the tears, you clear your throat before you can attempt to look at him.
Why does he have to say things like that? It makes it harder to resist the pull you feel towards him. You are teetering on the very edge of being professional and he seems keen to push you over, whether he knows it or not.
“Thank you,” you finally manage out, though so many words linger unsaid on the tip of your tongue. You meet his eyes and fireworks erupt over your skin at the way he looks up at you so openly. The air is sucked out of the room, deathly still, like before a summer thunderstorm. It leaves you buzzing and dizzy.
He stands, slowly, as if not to startle you, and steps forward. With each inch closer he gets, the air shifts, beginning to crackle with electricity. Your heart gallops faster. If he touches you, you are done for, you just know it. The lightning burning bright inside of him has the power to wreak irrevocable havoc on you. And you cannot afford to let your feelings get in the way of your survival because when he breaks your heart, which you know he will, you will have nowhere to go.
You have the baby to think of now. It is easier to sit in the discomfort of your complicated feelings than in the pain of the inevitable heartbreak that will come when he realizes you’re just like any of his other women—you’re replaceable, at least romantically. And God knows you’ve had too much pain in your life related to the whims of men to add more.
The air sizzles as he reaches for you, tempting you to burn with his touch. Part of you wants to burn—the deep heat swirling unbidden low in your belly dares you to let him—but you jump back out of instinct.
“I-I should get ready for bed,” you stutter, racing to your suitcase to grab your nightgown before hightailing it to the bathroom and slamming the door harder than you intended. You think you hear him chuckle as you lean back on the door to catch your breath.
Your body shakes but not out of fear of him. No, it’s like you’ve refused it something vital and it quakes with the need of release. Like the crack of lightning in him would bring the relief of rain, cutting the heat between you.
It doesn’t make sense. You’ve never felt this before, but you know it is dangerous. Lightning is beautiful but deadly, after all.
As you stumble your way through your bedtime routine, you realize in a few short days, the storm of a man out there will be your husband. And one more boundary between you you’ve relied on to keep you on solid ground will be gone.
And one look in the mirror at the exhaustion lining your features, you wonder if it is too late; perhaps the coming storm is inevitable and will tear you to pieces no matter what you do.
There are worse ways to perish than in the arms of Elvis Presley.
*
The swell of electricity doesn’t go away. It abates some, at times, but your body is hellbent and hyperaware of Elvis’ every move, of every breath he takes.
You desperately want to blame your job—you’re supposed to be observant of him, after all—or the changes in your body because of the baby, but the waves of rolling thunder build under your skin despite the physical space he is trying to give you.
The marathon of a session on Monday does not make things better. You’d hoped it would be a distraction. He needs to be completely focused to bang out at least nine more songs to finish the album. There will be no time for anything but music.
Except you somehow forget music fuels him and makes him glow from the inside out. Instead of dissipating, the storm just builds and builds, like wild thunderheads in the sky. He lives each song so completely, expertly maneuvering through mournful ballads and bouncing pop and raunchy blues like he was born to do. It’s mind-bending and alluring, and every time he draws you in, it feels like he’s singing directly to you, about you.
He's enjoying himself, despite the long hours. Completely in his element. And electricity zings though your body during the playful moans at the end of Such a Night. By the Thrill of Your Love, you think you might combust.
And he knows it, by the sparkle in his eyes and the pull of his defiant but tempting upper lip. He wasn’t offended by the boundary you set last night in the slightest, giving you the physical space you desperately needed unless needed to keep up the ruse of your engagement. But everything he does, every lyric he sings, every twitch of his body, makes you feel as though you are swirling out of control. The more he respects your need for physical space, the more you want him to box you in.
He's doing just that, just not with his body.
You are completely on edge when not absorbed in his performance and technique. God, what an idiot you were to think he wasn’t talented. His stint in Germany only served to strengthen his craft. The world isn’t ready for this new and improved Elvis. Girls will be beside themselves.
You just never thought you’d be one of them.
By the time he gets to the last song, he can’t stave off how tired he’s getting. The marathon session has taken all night and into the dawn. He lets everyone know he’s not entirely convinced he should even sing this Are You Lonesome Tonight? but the Colonel, along with Steve, the RCA rep, press him.
Worry for Elvis’ wellbeing has you voicing your concern, but the men look at you as if you are a silly little girl and not a professional. It takes a moment to remember the only one who really knows your role here is Parker, and despite nearly being asleep on your feet, you are ready to go toe to toe with him. Elvis concedes to his manager, however, before shooting you a look and running his hands down your arms to placate you. The long touch of him distracts you enough to lessen your annoyance for the moment.
This last song is the only time he kicks you out of the room, along with everyone except the musicians, but you manage to sneak into the booth to listen. You can’t see anything through the window because he’s ordered all the lights be turned off, but the result has goosebumps rising all over your body with the emotionally eerie but gentle lilt of his performance.
By the end, tears are streaming unbidden down your cheeks, though you aren’t entirely sure why. You race to wipe your cheeks before the lights pop back on, but he catches your eye through the window and swell of emotion rises again.
You know you are careening quickly towards something beyond your control. The pregnancy is one thing pushing you towards the edge, but this new arrangement with Elvis, the intimacy involved, has your heart racing with both curiosity and fear. It is all so far out of your experience but there is no real choice. It is whatever this new normal is or running for your life.
Being off kilter and filled with feelings you don’t understand is uncomfortable, but you’ll take it versus the alternative, though you can’t help the fear you’ve put Elvis in terrible danger crawling at the edges of your mind.
It’s this that keeps you alert as you all board the bus to head back to Memphis after a quick diner breakfast. Elvis is dying on the vine, the energy of performing all night taking its toll. The darkness around his eyes and the pallor of his skin tells you everything you need to know, but his limbs twitch restlessly all the way home, even when he doses, curled up into you with his head on your shoulder. It’s as if he can’t shut it off even when he is completely drained.
It’s too much for him. Your anxiety builds and builds in the hours it takes to return to Graceland. You are worrying your lips raw between your concern for him and the position you’ve put him in. Guilt swirls in your stomach, making your carsickness worse.
On top of it, your body is desperate to be close to him, as though his presence is a balm to your burdens, but those feelings just bring more confusion. You relish the tickle of his long, soft hair against your jaw and the way his fingers interweave with yours, even in sleep. Despite how ready you were to leave mere days ago, you aren’t quite sure you could do so now without damaging a part of yourself you didn’t know existed.
It frightens you, but the tingle that zings down your arms and into your palm lets you know it is exhilarating, too.
The bus is quiet of its usual boisterousness when it pulls through the gates of Graceland in the early afternoon. It is hard to believe how much everything has changed in a few short days, since the last time you arrived like this.
“Elvis,” you whisper, but he barely stirs. His eyes are closed, and his full lips are open slightly, giving him an air of innocence that tugs at your heart. “Elvis, sweetheart, we’re home.”
Sweetheart? Madone, where did that come from? You blush at your use of the endearment, not having used it since your brothers were little boys and certainly never with a man.
Elvis sputters and his long eyelashes flutter open as he stretches his long arms. “Mmm, ‘sweetheart,’ huh?” he murmurs, his lips turning up in a small, sleepy smile.
“I—you must have dreamed that,” you reply, flustered, but you know your pink cheeks and the way you twist your ring give you away.
He just grins. “You can call me sweetheart all day, Little Bird.” Then, he pulls you down for a sweet, chaste kiss, which surprises you. He tastes of sleep and coffee and chewing gum. The kiss is quick but sends a tremble through you all the same, especially since the bus is nearly empty.
When he pulls back and takes a look at you, his eyes fill with concern. He runs his thumb under your eye, as though he could wipe away the darkness you know is there. “Did you sleep at all, baby?”
You shake your head no, trying to brush him off by getting up to walk away, but he stands and grabs your arm. Pulling you back gently, he wraps his arms around your middle. You give up trying to wiggle away—he’s stronger than you. You’re surprised to find you don’t mind it. If it were any other man, you’d be panicking at the closeness, but it seems you’ve grown used to Elvis’ near constant displays of physical affection.
“I’m fine, Elvis. Let’s go inside.”
“Little one, the doc said you need sleep…”
His vacillation through pet names and endearments should annoy you, but they don’t. Not anymore. You sigh.
“…and you’re gettin’ married tomorrow. You need ta look your best for your husband,” he says, waggling his eyebrows.
Rolling your eyes at his silliness, you try and mask the surprising buzz of excitement running through your limbs at the reality that in a day you will be married to this exasperatingly handsome and talented mess of a man. It’s overwhelming and a little exhilarating, but you can feel exhaustion pulling at you, knowing you’ll be knee deep in preparations in a few short hours.
You resist the urge to lay your head on his shoulder, but he senses your resignation in the way your body deflates. It’s hard, you realize, to let anyone else take care of you.
“How ‘bout I rest with you? Will you at least try to take a nap then?” If he’s conceding to more rest, you know you must look worse for the wear. But it does the trick.
“Alright, fine. I will rest if you do, too,” you concede.
Being back at Graceland—back home—helps you relax more. No one can get to you or Elvis here. You fear you won’t be able to sleep, but once your head hits the pillow, Elvis safe and resting inches away, you slide into the dreamless dark.
Rare B/W Candid Photo's Of Elvis Presley Opening Night At The International Hotel in Vegas NV. On The 31st July In 1969 From Elvis Presley Fan Journalist Reporter's Elvis Presley B/W Candid Photo Archives. Terry O'neill
Happy one year anniversary to the post that started it all!!
And happy 54th anniversary to this legendary outfit!! 💗🧣💗
It’s amazing how much has happened in a year and honestly, this anniversary overwhelms me a little bit for both obvious and not so obvious reasons. Making this post was where I got my original inspiration for Pink Scarf and my first post in this fandom that got any sort of traction. Since then, I’ve met so many wonderful, supportive people in this amazing community and I am so happy to be a part of such a group. You’ve changed my life in so many incredible ways and I wish I could accurately convey my feelings in this moment but it really comes down to being so grateful: to you all, to Elvis, to all the friends I’ve made here, to the multitude of little things that brought me here. I love y’all. 💗 And happy anniversary—this one’s for us! 💗🧣💗
Events In The History And Of The Life Of Elvis Presley Today On The 1st Of August In 1969.
Elvis Presley The 1969 Press Conference August 1st, 1969 Vegas NV.
Q: Elvis 'Why have you waited so long to perform Live again?' 'Did you return to Live Performing because of the Phenomenal successes of Wales Singer Tom Jones and British Crooner Engelbert Humperdinck?'
Elvis: (Elvis shook his head at the suggestion) 'I think they are great', 'But My decision to return was made in 1965, and it was hard to wait', ... 'I don't think I could have waited any longer' ... 'We had to finish up the movie commitments we had before I could start on this ... 'I missed the Live contact with an Audience'. 'It was getting harder and harder to sing to a camera all day'.
Q: 'Can you remember first coming to Vegas?'
Elvis: 'Sure, I was 19 years old'. (Elvis was actually 21) 'Nobody knew Me'.... 'Whe're you from...Boy?, They would ask'.
Q: 'How do you like being a father?'
Elvis: 'I like it!'
Q: 'Are you and Priscilla planning on adding to your Family?'
Elvis: 'You'll be the first to know'.
Q: 'What things do you do when you are at home at Graceland?'
Elvis: 'I ride horse back, swim and talk with the tourists hanging out at the gates'.
Q:'How does your wife feel about you being a Sex Symbol again?'
Elvis: 'I don't know... you would have to ask her'.
Q: 'Do your Wife and Daughter, Lisa Marie accompany you?'
Elvis: 'Priscilla is here,... but my Daughter is in L.A. with her Nanny'.... 'She could not make it'.
Q: 'How do you Manage to stay so Young?'.
Elvis: 'I don't know'. 'One of these days I'll probably fall apart'. 'I feel, I've just been lucky'.
Q: 'Are you tired of your present type of movie, have you grown tired of the movie plots?'
Elvis: 'Yes, I want to Change the type of Script I've been doing'.
Q: 'What kind of Scripts do you like?'
Elvis: 'Something with Meaning'.... 'I'm going after More Serious Material'. 'I couldn't dig always playing the Guy who'd
get into a fight, Beat the Guy up,.., and in the Next Shot Sing to Him'.
Q: 'Do you think it was a mistake to do so many Movie Sound-Track Albums?'
Elvis: 'I think so'..... 'When you do Ten songs in a movie,they can't all be good songs'. 'Anyway',.. 'I got tired of Singing to Turtles'.
Q: 'When you met the Beatles', 'No press was allowed, why was that?'
Elvis: 'I think because we could relax more that way and we could talk Candidly'.
Q: 'Do you like to wear leather-jackets, like the one you wore in your TV-Special?'
Elvis: 'No'.... 'I hate wearing them, because they are too hot when your working'.
Q: 'Where did you get the design for your stage out-fits?'
Elvis: 'I got the idea by a Karate-gi,.. I once had'.
Q: 'What do you think of the Hollywood scene?'
Elvis: 'I just don't go for it....', 'I have nothing against it, but I just don't enjoy it'.
Q: 'How long did you rehearse for these shows?'
Elvis: 'I practised for nearly 3 months', 'Today I went through Three Complete Dress Rehersals'. 'This was the fourth time I did that show today', ... 'I'm really Beat'.
Q: 'How did you choose the songs for the show?'
Elvis: 'I just sang My Favorite Songs'.
Q: 'Do you want to do more Live Shows?'
Elvis: 'I want to ... I would like to play all over the World' ... 'I chose Las Vegas to Play First, Because it is a place People come to from All Over'.
Q: 'Are you trying to change your image with songs like 'In the Ghetto'?
Elvis: 'No, 'Ghetto' was such a great song, I just couldn't pass it up after I heard it'. 'There are a lot of New Records out now that have the same sound I started, ... But they're Better', ... 'I mean, you can't compare a song like 'Yesterday' with 'Hound Dog', ... Can You?'
Q: 'Why have you led such a secluded life all these years?'
Elvis: 'It's not secluded Honey' ... 'I'm just Sneaky'.
Q: 'Is it true you dye your hair?'
Elvis: 'Sure, I have always done it for the movies'.
Q: 'Did you enjoy performing Live again?'
Elvis: 'Yes ! ... 'This has been one of the Most Exciting Nights of my Life'.
Q: 'Did you feel nervous during the show?'
Elvis: 'For the First Three songs or so, I didn't feel relaxed until after Love me Tender before I loosened up' ... 'Then I Thought, What The Heck ... Get With It Man!, or you might be out of a Job Tomorrow'.
Q: 'Do you have a share in the International Hotel?'
Elvis: 'No, I have not'.
Q: 'Why did you choose a Negro backup group?:
Elvis: 'They help get a feeling and get to my soul'.
Q: 'Have you ever seen England's top singer, Cliff Richard?'
Elvis: 'Yes, I met him in Germany a long time ago'.
[Elvis was mistaken, he did not meet Cliff, but Cliff did try to meet Elvis, he visited one of Elvis' residences in Germany but unluckily for Cliff, Elvis was not home. Possibly Elvis was told the story and these years later miss-remembered the story. Memory does play tricks on people.]
Q: 'Mr. Presley',.. 'I've been sent here by 'Lord Sutch Enterprises' "To offer you One Million Pounds Sterling to make Two Apperances at the Wembley Empire Stadium in England',.... 'This Price will include a Documentary that will be Filmed during and after the Shows'. 'It will Only Take 24 Hours'.
Elvis: (Elvis points to Col.Parker) 'You'll have to ask him about that'.
Colonel Parker: 'Just put down the desposit'.
Elvis: 'Elvis, how much do you get paid for these performances?'
Colonel Parker: 'We are pleased with the deal. I am glad He is Here'.
Q: 'Is it true you get paid in International-stocks?'
Colonel Parker: (Parker Speaks up again) 'Certainly not'.... 'The only thing we get for Free are the Crickets in the Rooms'.
Q: 'Do you still own about 10 cars?'
Elvis: 'I have never owned that many'.... 'Only 4 or 5 at most'.
Q: 'Elvis is there any Other Individual You would Rather Be?'
Elvis: 'Are you Kidding?
Q: What’s it like to be the Grandfather of rock and roll?
(laughs). I didn’t know that I was.
Q: Are you doing shows because of the recent success of Tom Jones in cabaret?
No, that’s not the reason. Although I admire Tom Jones very much, and think he’s a great talent. I guess I felt it was time to do live shows because I missed doing them.
Q: I noticed in your repertoire you did some Beatles songs. What do you think of the Beatles and their material?
I admire the Beatles and think they are very good. The lyrics of pop songs are getting better all the time, they have more meaning.
Q: When you met the Beatles, why was there no press allowed?
I guess it was because we could relax and talk friendly to each other.
Q: Did anyone influence you in your career?
Yes, people like him. (Elvis introduces Fats Domino). This is one of my influences from way back, Fats Domino. Just look at those rings and that diamond watch, aren't they fabulous?
All color candid photo's here taken at Elvis Presley's 1969 vegas press conference.
Well hello there my babies! I’m deeply sorry I wasn’t able to post Broken Glass 11.1 here as planned yesterday…between navigating some ongoing health issues and having a sudden death in the family this weekend (I swear, this July (year) has been exhausting utter madness), I literally didn’t even realize I had forgotten to post until just now! It is unlocked HERE over on Patreon for free, so you should be able to read it easy-peasy (hopefully 🤞🏼) and eventually when I have more energy, I’ll post it here and on AO3.
Thanks for your patience! Like I said, things have been wild lately (hence why I’ve been MIA a lot), and I’m barely holding on to life life-ing at the moment. 😵💫
This is a common misconception because they’re such similar environments, but you should be aware that dads are native to Home Depot, while lesbians are actually native to Lowe’s. At this point, however, both dads and lesbians have made themselves at home in both Home Depot and Lowe’s to the point that trying to separate them back into their original ranges would probably do more harm than good to the delicate ecosystem of large chain hardware stores.
A properly raised and socialized Dad will be perfectly comfortable cohabiting with Lesbians. Its not really “encroaching on another’s territory”. You wouldn’t say that about foxes in a forest that also homes bobcats, would you? No. It’s just two different species that have both evolved to live in similar/the same environment. As long as they recognize each other as equals, Dads and Lesbians are more than capable of cohabitation.
Now, if you were to release a pack of Lumberjacks into a Lowes or Home Depot, that’s where chaos will reign. Being adapted to a far harsher and more demanding environment, the Lumberjacks would simply push Dads and Lesbians both out and also consume far more than a sustainable amount of resources. It would be like releasing bears at a country club.
As a former timber-harvester… I feel this is potentially accurate in theory. But highly improbable in actuality.
Lumberjacks, like most megafauna species generally require more space than the average hardware store, even a big box store could provide. The misconception is that Lumberjacks are a social species because of how they often work and live together.
This is a matter of necessity, not preference, and a survival technique for thriving under the LogBoss.
A “pack” of Lumberjacks, if not under the environmental pressure of a LogBoss will naturally disperse until they each have a wide territory.
Lumberjacks rarely fight for territory.
One on one, a Lumberjack could drive out a Dad or Lesbian, however the latter tend to travel in social packs.
Lumberjacks will passively retreat on the presence of large numbers of people. Kind of like Sasquatch.
Getting a “pack” of Lumberjacks assembled would be hard enough unless they were forced into a Hardware Store by a LogBoss. In that case, they would already be in a heightened and potentially agitated state far above their natural behavior. This artificial scenario can be likened to a circus animal running amok. If it had been in the wild, the incident would not have occurred.
Free-roaming Lumberjacks are the cryptids of the Hardware ecosystem. They are surprisingly quiet and unobtrusive.
Please stop labeling Lumberjacks as dangerous roving social predators. They are intermediate level omnivores and remarkably peaceful unless threatened.
question where does the “art student” or “DIYer” “crafter” or “soap maker” or “miniaturist“ etc. who has ventured into the store for supplies fall into the ecosystem/what is their impact of said ecosystem?
Most of the above are native to craft and hobby stores (art students, historically, are native to museums, but having been introduced to hobby stores, have found a niche for themselves and thrived), but all can be seen in hardware stores on occasion due to territorial overlap. They are generally low-impact, as they tend to stick to specific small areas and primarily utilize different resources. While a large group of any of them can be disruptive (art students, in particular, are known to travel in packs), in general, they are more likely to have territorial disputes with one another than with the local fauna.
A point of clarity -“crafter” is a bit misleading; while it conjures a specific image, much like ‘fish’ or ‘reptile’ it actually covers a broad array of wildly disparate species, and in general, more descriptive nomenclature is preferred. Fiber artists in particular are a genus to watch out for, particularly in groups. Beware a roving pack of domesticated quilters. They fear nothing, will go anywhere, and due to their social nature, will often seek interaction from other species that thrive best in solitude. They are quite friendly, and will happily adopt members of other species; the concern is that their adoptees do not always wish to be adopted.
I can say as a former craft store worker that if you wish to see true fear, look into the eyes of a Dad who must venture into a craft store. Despite the overlap of familiar beings known to him from his native hardware store habitat, Dads are instinctively aware that craft stores are not for them; they contain unfamiliar perils and even the seemingly familiar may have strange variances and unnerving secrets. (”Why is this airbrush so small? What do you mean nails, why would you… WUT!!”)
Only experienced silverbacks or the boldest young Dads dare venture into a craft store for long without his mate or offspring to keep roving Craft Ladies at bay and guide him in this strange ecosystem. If a Dad enters with his mate and is separated from her, he will often scuttle for the seeming familiarity of Woodcrafts, Models, or Paints (the latter not to be confused with Fine Arts, unquestioned territory of art students), but he eyes Scrapbooking and Jewelry with trepidation and will usually venture into those exotic areas only in the company of females of his pack.
Lumberjacks are rarely spotted entering craft stores of their own volition, for while they do not fear it as Dads do, they know it is an environment unsuited for megafauna such as themselves.
Hardware store Lesbians generally adapt more easily to craft stores, although they may enlist another Lesbian of a subspecies more adapted to that environment to guide them until they find their niche. Lesbians have even been known to seek the aid of a Craft Lady, a native fauna that share similarities with Lesbians but are usually smaller and nimbler to suit their chosen habitat. Dads who witness this are often awed by the Lesbians’ temerity, for although larger, Dads are generally wary of the cunning and dexterous Craft Ladies and may mistake their enthusiastic pack greetings as predatory swarming.
Craft Ladies, secure in their ecological niche, have no fear of interlopers and take the presence of non-native beings in stride, although they may become territorial about scarcer resources.
The only truly invasive species that threaten craft stores are Brides-to-Be, who are mere annoyances individually, but like locusts may descend in hordes and lay waste, leaving swathes of destruction in their wake. Fortunately for the Craft Ladies, Brides-to-Be are seasonal and usually only a threat in the spring and early summer.
Is anybody going to address the newly invasive species of BuJo enthusiasts into the craft store/art supply store environment? Why aren’t we talking about the dangerous proliferation of Leuchtturm 1917s and the growing threat of Dotted Moleskins? I had to liberate a Dad from a tangle of washi tape in the art supply store the other day and it wasn’t pretty.
The natural habitat of journalers was stationary stores, which have been replaced by office supplies stores, not the same. Journalers invade the craft stores and art supplies stores to get the markers and washi tape and Sakura pens they require for survival.
Another thing to note is all of those habitats must adapt to the seasonal migration of goths. As soon as the faintest hint of spooky can be detected at those stores, goths will arrive in packs. A small pack of goths determined to forage can strip the shelves of a seasonal section bare in 30 minutes.
I think some people forget that some literature and some media is meant to be deeply uncomfortable and unsettling. It's meant to make you have a very visceral reaction to it. If you genuinely can't handle these stories then you are under no obligation to consume them but acting as if they have no purpose or as if people don't have a right to tell these stories, stories that often relate to the darkest or most disturbing parts of life, then you should do some introspection.
I’ve read some things that deal in sad/dark/actually depressing and disturbing subject matter. I’ve loved them and the points they make without endorsing the events portrayed.
It’s always disappointing to get online and see that the conversation is “X thing shouldn’t exist” on the grounds that it made somebody feel badly. It was meant to make you feel that way and it’s normal that it did - it’s okay that you stop reading it or don’t finish it but I am BEGGING you to consider why it made you uncomfortable and why the author felt the need (if the answer isn’t immediately obvious, as it can be). There isn’t shame in something putting you off so badly that you shelve it.
The sterilization of reality is a detriment to all who exist within it. To censor stories with painful themes is to erase the reality that such stories are based in some horrific truth and works to erase the reality that many people have endured.
This trend or whatever we want to call it has gotten so bad that I listened to an entire lecture from somebody about how awful a book was and how it shouldn’t exist at all, how the author was a terrible person for concocting it and how it hurt people. When I asked what the book was, this person not only could barely recall the name but HAD NEVER READ IT. I bought the book. I read the book. It accomplished its task beautifully and I found it to be a cathartic experience. I also understood how it could make people so uncomfortable and would never judge anybody for setting it down.
It’s okay not to like something and distance yourself from it. Remember that those rules apply only to you, though, because they speak only to your own psyche.
Periodic reminder that one of the many roles of fiction is microdosing on big scary feelings so you build resilience, empathy, understanding, and defense against the real thing.
Forever Fangirl @missmaywemeetagain - Tumblr Blog | Tumgag
