Welcome to the Disasterverse @mistimedmanagement - Tumblr Blog

I started using Head and Shoulders ten years ago for itchy scalp and dandruff, and then for ten years I have not had itchy scalp and dandruff, so I thought “why do I still buy shampoo to combat itchy scalp and dandruff when I do not have itchy scalp and dandruff,” so I stopped buying the shampoo for itchy scalp and dandruff and can you guess I have now? Can you predict what currently afflicts me? It’s alright if you can’t because apparently I fuckin couldn’t either

andhumanslovedstories

Cutting something out of your life because you think you don’t need it any more only to realize that it was in fact working as intended and preventing a problem that will return should you stop doing this is a good experiment to run periodically with something small like dandruff shampoo, lest you start to think it would be a good idea to do this with like let’s say public health and the social safety net and vaccines

thomrainierskies

I had a liver transplant when I was 14 and like six months later I was chatting with my surgeon and he said “there’s gonna come a time, probably when you’re a teenager, where you’re gonna think, ‘I feel great, why am I still taking all this medication? I haven’t needed it in years.’ and you’re gonna want to stop taking all this medication. Guess what’s gonna happen then? You’re gonna go into rejection and your liver is gonna start failing, and you’re gonna be dying again, and we’re gonna have to find you another liver. So don’t do that.” And I said “why the fuck would anyone do that?” and he said “people are stupid.”

every once in a while when I get annoyed by a pharmacy or don’t wanna get out of bed to do my drugs I think “ugh, this is dumb, why do I do this?” and that conversation slams into me like a truck and I remember that I am, in fact, stupid

zenosanalytic

#you are not immune to the recency bias(via@arrows-for-pens)

ad-wills

daily-spooky

catchymemes

great-tweets

Beware!

rayvenreayes

Avoid sci-hub too👀

queeranarchism

From Ask for PDFs from People with Institutional Access

galaxa-13

You know what I want more of? Variety in aliens. No, I don’t mean more designs for alien species. I mean variety within a species. They always seem to have the same government, the same culture, the same religion, the same language. Come on, humans don’t work that way!

“Say, there’s a Qualar over there. What are they saying?”

“No idea.”

“What?”

“That’s a Kinzian Qualar. I’m a Surolian Qualar. You’d have just as much luck understanding them as I would. You’re lucky I even speak Human.”

“Human isn’t a language.”

“What?”

praise-the-lord-im-dead

“Carl, we’ve been speaking Russian. There’s also Arabic, French, English–about a thousand others–”

“HOW DO YOU HAVE SO MANY LANGUAGES YOUR PLANET IS TINY.”

allthedragonagenamesaretaken

My favorite part about this is that the alien is named “Carl.”

mistimedmanagement

He must've gotten a copy of TWD that we launched into space cause why tf not??

zoya-nazyalenskys-archive

people need to realise that a poor little meow meow must be a character who has committed atrocities you cannot poor little meow meow a good guy that’s not how this works

zoya-nazyalenskys-archive

what this post has shown me is that so many of people on this hellsite cannot distinguish between a poor little meow meow and a blorbo from my shows smh

luulapants

Hope this helps!

thebreakfastgenie

who made this post

marlinspirkhall

Another hit post from God themself

trekkiemage

headspace-hotel

I was about to reblog this, and then I saw the picture and I got the joke, in that order.

like this is just what a normal D&D session is like

luxlightly

If I hadn’t seen this caption I literally would never have gotten the joke. This is just a perfect representation of a normal D&D session.

naamahdarling

With 7 players? This is going incredibly well.

ad-wills

rain-droplet

all art is being beautiful and amazing

not mine though, it's special

mistimedmanagement

Nu Uh

snippit-crickit

Perfectly normal train running to greet you cmon give it a hug (FYI, its this guy i drew half a year ago and i still think about it)

werewolf-transgenderism

hey don't cry. 7,401 species of frog in the world, ok?

werewolf-transgenderism

IMPORTANT UPDATE: 7,532 species of frog in the world, ok?!

werewolf-transgenderism

great news! 7,556 species of frog in the world, ok?!

werewolf-transgenderism

hey don't cry, now there are 7,576 species of frog in the world, ok?!

werewolf-transgenderism

excellent news! 7,591 species of frog in the world, peace and love on planet earth

werewolf-transgenderism

guess what! 7,624 species of frog on planet earth, ok?

werewolf-transgenderism

hey don't cry, 7,645 species of frog on planet earth, ok? peace and love on planet autism

werewolf-transgenderism

great news! 7,653 species of frog on planet earth, ok?

werewolf-transgenderism

hey don't cry. 7,670 species of frog on planet earth, ok?

werewolf-transgenderism

new year new frogs! 7,678 species of frog on planet earth, ok?

werewolf-transgenderism

hey don't cry. 7,683 species of frog in the world, ok? ❤️

werewolf-transgenderism

hey don't cry. 7,698 species of frog in the world, peace and love on planet earth

rain-droplet

where are they coming from ? frog scientists toiling in the lab to make new versions monthly ?

aluria-sevhex

frog scientists toiling in nature to discover new versions monthly 👍

rain-droplet

I do like your take but I was implying the frog scientists were frogs who were scientists who make new frogs

bogleech

madmaudlingoes

It’s not just that the leaves will break down on their own (and enrich the soil while they’re at it!). During the winter, all sorts of insects use leaf litter for shelter, and they’re the first food available to larvae in early spring. Leaves also insulate the plants under them during the winter, which is important if you’re in an area prone to frost heaving.

One of the best thing you can do for native pollinators in your area is Leave the Leaves!

diggingforkuponuts

My mom stopped raking her leaves when she found out about this but her neighbor used his leaf blower to clear out her yard the first year she decided to try. So she started posting a Leave the Leaves sign in the yard each year with an explanation about why it’s good and two winters later only one house still rakes their lawn each year.

We’ve seen a dramatic increase in the biodiversity in the neighborhood since. We have birds that we haven’t seen since we moved into the city from living rurally and those birds are starting to nest in the trees and gardens in spring. The swallows and bats are back at night. The single woodpecker we would only occasionally see visits daily and even has a friend that has joined it. We have more squirrels and rabbits and shockingly fewer moles and voles. We heard an owl outside last fall.

Leave the leaves indeed.

venpyr

"don't mass reblog/like :/" coward. fool. somebody just went through and liked and reblogged 64 things from my blog in the span of half an hour at most. and i've never felt more alive in my life

eerian-sadow

This isn't Instagram, my darlings. It's not considered creepy (except by people imported from Instagram and frankly they need to learn the culture HERE before trying to boss anyone around) or weird or particularly distressing. Many of us don't even look at our notifications to realize that you've done it.

And frankly, I put that on my blog to bring me some joy. If it brings you joy too, put it on your blog along with the next fifty posts in the same theme. (If you're reblogging my fics, thank you, I love you 3000.)

mischievouswork

I get SO happy when someone likes/reblogs a bunch of my posts in a row. Like, yes! I’m collecting all these for YOU!! If you loved it then I’m doing something right :D

dominant-dominion

forthefuns

follow forthefuns for more funny stuff

invenblocker

Your honor! Please direct your attention towards the manga.

As you can see there are small pieces of paper sticking out of every volume.

But no such paper is sticking out of the Batman comic.

The reason? The Batman book doesn’t belong to the library. The photographer put it there to take a picture.

minipupball

Once again making hasty assumptions, Wright?

First of all, I’d like to direct the court’s attention to this particular spot, in the top right-hand corner.

Notice how the words are blocking the top of the Batman book.

With this in mind, how can you claim that there is “no such paper sticking out of the Batman comic”?!

invenblocker

Say whaaaat?

Well uhm

Look at the size of the paper pieces, they’re all sticking pretty far out.

If there was paper in the batman comic, it would be big enough to stick up over the text.

And while gravity does exist, it probably won’t make the paper do a 90 degree turn and just lean horisontally left at the middle.

minipupball

Still grasping for straws, Wright?

Hypothetically, if there were a paper there, this picture would not be able to prove its presence. I’ve taken the liberty of drawing a diagram to illustrate my point. We are faced with three possibilities. It is possible that (1) the paper was simply tucked in deeper than the others.

Paper is a soft material, Wright. It’s not unreasonable for it to do a (2) 90 degree turn.

Or perhaps, (3) a paper does not exist there at all.

Either way, you cannot prove your client innocent without sufficient evidence.

Which, of course, is impossible thanks to the obtrusive words.

invenblocker

I’m sorry Edgeworth.

I concede that I can’t disprove theory 1

But the image you submited for theory 2 is contradictory.

Look at the tilt of the other papers. They clearly prove how much the paper would tilt.

And theory 3 is my point! Why would the library’s book not have this piece of paper when the other library books do?

While you still have thory 1, there is another contradiction.

The books are not in alphabetical order, this proves that the batman comic was placed there specifically for the picture!

minipupball

Ack.

(Perhaps I should’ve left the artistry to the forensic artist…)

Now hold it right there! It doesn’t matter which direction the paper is going because it’s impossible to prove it even exists!

Those theories are all the same! We do not have enough information to prove them. There could be an infinite amount of papers in there for all we know. I simply presented them only so that the court could better understand your baseless conjecture!

… I suppose the order of the books do seem out of the ordinary. However, therein lies not just one possibility. Clearly, those are Japanese graphic novels, also known as “manga”. And the Batman comic book is a graphic novel, too, no?

Seeing as it currently has only graphic novels in the shelf, it is possible that any other novels have simply not yet been restocked. Asserting whether or not this effect was deliberate is useless– there is no way of knowing if the photographer and the captioner are the same person, let alone their involvement in this picture.

Face it Wright, you can’t prove any of these groundless accusations!