It’s Only One K, My Dudes

A moron on the internet

[eptck]

you have to be kinder to people with memory issues.

you have to be kinder to people who are slow processors.

you have to be kinder to people who don't understand your jokes.

you have to be kinder to people who forget important dates.

you have to be kinder to people with cognitive decline.

you have to be kinder to people who were always this way, too.

you have to be kind. you have to be kind.

[maidslime]

mom's minion memes for real justice

i posted these originally like 9 or 10 years ago or something but I can't find them anywhere, so now you get retortured.

[sapphireh3arts]

i know folks are gonna call me a pedo for this one, but i grew up seeing my mom and grandma naked. they had health issues and at times needed care and help showering. and i truly think more kids need to be shown the nonsexual reality of naked women at a young age. there is nothing sexual about my grandmothers breasts, they were simply body parts. more women die of heart attacks because people are too afraid of breasts to do real chest compressions, because they are scared to touch their breasts. the sexualization of our bodies literally kills us. i need people to be more normal about naked bodies and i'm 100% serious.

[queer-as-in-fuck-12]

drug addicts deserve housing, food, water, and healthcare btw

[romanceyourdemons]

i bet belle and hua mulan would love each other. the filial piety brothers 💪

[romanceyourdemons]

belle: i respect my father so much

hua mulan: hey i respect MY father so much, and also yours

belle: i would lay down my life for him in an instant, so of course when his life was on the line i didn’t hesitate to set aside whatever identity and thoughts of the future i had had to defend him

hua mulan: that’s crazy i also did that

belle: i didn’t expect that i would end up with more grandeur and authority than i ever could have accessed otherwise, but of course i didn’t forget who i was doing this for or let the power tempt me

hua mulan: 100% with you sister

belle: also the giant bloodthirsty cat creature gives insane dick like you wouldn’t even believe

hua mulan: the what

[firawren]

Not letting @dumpster-fire-rats leave that in the tags

[pearlywater]

make me feel protected and safe and i’ll lowkey fall in love with you

[naughtypiggy]

Nothing lowkey about it

[i-am-a-fish]

reminder that you are cool and legend

[dragon-in-a-fez]

one of the funniest conversations I ever had with my ex was when they were still getting used to Celsius and asked me "what's 20 degrees?" and instead of converting it, I said "it's the highest your dad will ever let you set the thermostat and when you say you're cold he tells you to put on another sweater, we're not made of money" and they went "oh, 68"

the fact that this reference was that fucking precise was something they went on to tell people about for years.

[kvothes]

a good thread

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

if I wrote a dystopian novel where the corrupt evil megacorporation that controls society has a fucking smirk for a logo, my editor would tell me to use a less heavy-handed metaphor

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

and yet

[twinkiefairy]

I love this because if I were to write a literary novel in the Western cannon that described the image of an apple with a chunk bitten off, any high school English student would tell you it is a Bible reference meant to represent the source of all evil and downfall of humanity and YET 

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

[s1r3n-slacks]

Today I discovered that melting ice makes a sound— it cracks, pops, fizzes and hisses like demonic Rice Krispies. Apparently it has to do with pressurized air bubbles and fractures from expansion, but this leads to a question which National Geographic already answered for me:

Which is similarly heavy handed but also extremely freaking metal

[abigailspinach]

https://dieworkwear.com/2022/08/26/how-to-develop-good-taste-pt-1/

From the comments "In my experience clothing on anyone looks best when it is done with confidence. We are all different shapes and sizes. I was really struck by your post on dressing well that included John Goodman in a faded t-shirt and jeans. He rocks it!"

Excellent advice, whatever gender or style one is looking for. Thank you

I'm a trans guy and Derek, I can tell you my wardrobe has improved a huge amount simply by reading your threads. The "dress for your body type" stuff never worked well for me; your threads about putting together an intentional look and for getting a good fit - that's 99% of the game.

derek guy (@dieworkwear.bsky.social)

I get this question a lot. I don't have strong views on how transmasc people should dress, but since I often get the question, I've thought

[mikkeneko]

I remember encountering exactly this sentiment when reading up about women's haircuts/hairstyles. The essay started off with "There are many different face shapes, and that means that the same hairstyle will look different on different people," and went on to list and show examples of each different facial shape. I thought, oh cool! human variety is amazing and aesthetics are so complex! And then the essay went from that right into "of course there is only one GOOD facial shape, The Beauteous Oval, and the whole point of hairstyling is to try to disguise all the other awful ugly deviant facial shapes and make everyone look exactly the same <3"

[roycohn]

there's an old anne rice interview circulating on twitter rn that i remember reading ages ago where she makes a pretty salient point about how submissive men who have bdsm fantasies etc will go to a sex worker and basically order the ala carte version of their fantasy to be performed in real life but women don't really have that same option and certainly not at the same point of availability so they read her horny books instead. and honestly that argument has been in the back of my mind every time people get on their high horses about the popularity of booktok romantasy novels or heated rivalry or whatever the "women are horny and we're upset about that" cultural property du jour is ever since. women, especially straight women, have so few outlets for their sexual desires, especially if they have a partner who doesn't share them, and i will never understand why "someone ELSE'S private sexual fantasy makes me uncomfortable and therefore they should not be allowed to engage with it, even if i am in no way being affected by it or even aware of it at all" is such a popular party line among allegedly progressive young people.

[atinymekanie]

The only issue I genuinely ever take with the romantasy tropes is that often they seem to be utterly nonconsensual on the part of the woman, as she is simply accepting (often with a lot of internal monologue about how she’s scared/concerned/upset about) the man treating her in whatever way his fantasy runs, which usually seems to be very dominance-based.

In this world where women are already subjected to the sexual whims of their male partners and their own desires are often ignored or belittled, I very decidedly don’t wish to read about that exact same thing happening to the FMC. Now, if the FMC is living her best life whilst being subjected to these tropes and shadow-daddy MMCs, then good for her!

I just really wish that the FMC’s pleasure and desires would be centered, rather than just assumed to be submissive and then executed as such without first asking.

So yeah, am I asking to see the kink negotiation scene? Hell yeah, I am.

[ariaste]

Nope. Because in a book like that, the BOOK ITSELF IS HAPPENING WITHIN THE KINK SCENE. The kink is non-diagetic! It's like saying "I don't like when movies have music that comes from nowhere, I wish they would show us where the musicians are, how do you have an orchestra pit when the heroine is running around the moors in the fog and the rain??" The kink negotiation scene isn't happening between the characters, it's happening implicitly between the reader and the author, and your power to withdraw consent is perpetual and ongoing -- all you have to do is close the book and walk away. You're allowed to do that, and I encourage you to do it.

But for things happening between the characters, if the FMC is scared-AND-horny or whatever, that's what the fantasy is supposed to be and you as the reader are expected to do some basic suspension of disbelief in order to engage with the idea that (just like in a kink scene!) this is not real, this is just for pretend, everyone is safe and no one is actually getting hurt. On account if it is fiction.

Now, if you're not into that, that's perfectly fine, I am not saying you have to be into reading things that you don't like. If you want to see some kink negotiation, that's cool. Sometimes, there are books that are about diagetic kink, and they do include those negotiation scenes. But for non-diagetic kink (aka the thing you're "taking issue" with), I don't think that it's fair to say that it's wrong for those books to be written that way. A woman's desires ARE being centered -- either the author's own desires or what the author is envisioning the reader will desire. If you're not into it--again, that's perfectly fine, it's just not the right book for you or the right genre for you. Read something else.

You missed the point of the first post, @atinymekanie, so let's read it together again:

women, especially straight women, have so few outlets for their sexual desires, especially if they have a partner who doesn't share them, and i will never understand why "someone ELSE'S private sexual fantasy makes me uncomfortable and therefore they should not be allowed to engage with it, even if i am in no way being affected by it or even aware of it at all" is such a popular party line among allegedly progressive young people.

"yes but the only issue i take with romantasy tropes [...]" literally is just "someone else's private sexual fantasy makes me uncomfortable" in different clothing. Do you see what I'm saying? You're doing the same thing. "Yes but when it comes to the thing *I* don't like, people shouldn't do it that way." Not everyone is doing it that way! Read different books!

[joannaismyqueen]

I don't have problems with tropes or kinks. I have issues with how fucking badly those books are written. There are books for children with better prose. And once the trend had gone up you suddenly have shitton of people saying that SJM is next Tolkien.

[roycohn]

buddy, if you think "sexy books with workmanlike prose" is some kind of trend, i highly recommend seeking out some pulp fiction or bodice-rippers from before 1980. there is prose there that makes SJM genuinely look like the next tolkien. if you're not enjoying it, it's not for you. move on. grow up.

[komsomolka]

looked up russians vs japanese piracy twt beef and its worse than i thought😭 it all started with japanese users being mad at discovering there's all those unofficial russian manga reading sites. russians tell them that there's not much licensed manga in russia to consume legally in the first place. japanese say its your problem, you should then go to japan and buy it legally. russians obviously go ??? it's crazy expensive to fly to japan plus we're sanctioned and often can't purchase foreign things with our money. japanese go full russophobia and say ahhh you evil aggressors deserve it for war. russians answer that even before the war this wouldn't be a solution. then brazilians join russians to fight on the side of piracy and started gotcha japanese with their war crimes and xenophobia. then other japanese users joined on the side of piracy and said anti-piracy japanese are hypocrites because its common in japan to listen to pirated western music. i guess this made japanese anti-piracy people even madder and they went all in saying crazy stuff like comparing piracy to rape. the more hilarious example was one japanese user trying to gotcha russians by threatening to pirate and read... dostoevsky🤣 sums up their level of ignorance regarding this whole topic.

[rorochi-yomo]

To clarify:

The debate was started after TMO/TuMangaOnline a spanish pirate manga&webtoon was taken down. The fight was first with latam users and the russians came as support. Jp and kr users were incredibly racist and xenophobic (obviously) and how hilarious privileged they are and yet so dense to see it lol

My favorite interaction was between a brazilian and japanese. Goes like this:

🇯🇵"If I were to pirate a brazilian work would you be happy?"

To which they reply:

🇧🇷"Yes of course! I can send you PDFs if you're interested."

[the-haiku-bot]

🇧🇷"Yes of course! I can

send you PDFs if

you’re interested.”

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[catasters]

[idratherhavefreedom]

[prismatic-bell]

The fact he's an orange and after the foot came up it took him an absurdly long time to recalibrate

[ellowynthenotking]

I love how cats just turn into liquids, that sweet boy just oozed into that space

[anneriawings]

OKAY CAN SOMEBODY EXPLAIN TO ME HOW THE FUCK YOU SHIP A PACKAGE OF COOKIES TO A FRIEND WHO LIVES IN NEW JERSEY, ONLY TO HAVE IT NOT GET THERE ON TIME BECAUSE IT SOMEHOW ENDED UP IN GUAM?

I JUST

GUAM?

[phantomrose96]

IM CRYING REAL TEARS MAH DUDES THE COOKIES ARE IN GUAM

KATIE TRIED TO SEND US COOKIES OUTTA THE GOODNESS OF HER HEART AND JUST

“OHHHH THESE COOKIES WERE SUPPOSED TO GO TO NEW JERSEY, PHIL? I THOUGHT YOU SAID

[anneriawings]

12/27, 8:37PM CT

ITS STILL IN FUCKING GUAM

[anneriawings]

12/28, 12:18PM CT

THE COOKIES ARE IN HONOLULU GUYS THEY ***FINALLY LEFT GUAM***

[anneriawings]

12/28, 10:22PM CT

THE COOKIES ARE FINALLY ON THEIR WAY TO NEW JERSEY

GO COOKIES GO

@phantomrose96 @cupcakecreeper​ @homebeccer GET READY

[anneriawings]

lol i was looking through my history to find the tracking number page and

[anneriawings]

12/30, 12:39AM CT

@phantomrose96 @homebeccer @cupcakecreeper

holy fuCK HOLY FUCK HOLY FUCK GUYS GUYS GUYS GUYS GUYS

THE COOKIES ARE ALMOST THERE

[phantomrose96]

The saga of Katie’s Guam cookies is my Anime of the Season

[anneriawings]

THEY’VE ARRIIIIIIIIIIVVEEDDDDD THEY’RE ON THE FRONT DOORSTEP

[anneriawings]

COOKIES ACQUIRED

[homebeccer]

THE THRILLING CONCLUSION

also as a bonus visual here’s a rough approximation of these cookies’ journey

[anneriawings]

how the FUCK did this blow up and get so many notes

[anneriawings]

SO FOR SHITS AND GIGGLES, @homebeccer @phantomrose96 @cupcakecreeper AND I WANTED TO KNOW HOW MUCH IT WOULD ACTUALLY COST THE U.S. GOVERNMENT TO INTENTIONALLY SEND THESE COOKIES FROM TEXAS TO GUAM TO NEW JERSEY AND???????????????

AND 

IT’S

IT’S

IT’S NOT AN OPTION IT’S NOT AN OPTION I CAN’T I-

I COULDN’T EVEN HAVE SENT THESE COOKIES TO GUAM EVEN IF I’D HAVE TRIED 

[phantomrose96]

Cant believe we uncovered the Guam Cookie glitch folks

Its not even an in-game feature

[crowreys-wormstache]

Oh my god it’s back

[anneriawings]

H O W

[anavar-immela]

I’ve had this sort of thing happen.

At least it explained why the package took so long to get here.

[phantomrose96]

I appreciate that they have an Entire Stamp for “Missent to Nepal”

No one said “hey let’s stop missending things to Nepal” they just said “let’s make a stamp for this” and called it a day.

I’m gonna get Missent to Guam tattooed on my arm in commemoration. 

[sharkgal4]

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

[offonaherosjourney]

Get Moist von Lipwig in charge of the US postal service ASAP

[korasonata]

Ok I know this is super old now but I work at a post office and I was curious about the price so I did some digging and I still don’t have a definite answer because THE REASON it says “no shipping services available” is because all shipping services were actually suspended to Guam at the time. As in no packages, parcels, letters, or mail or any kind could be sent to Guam. So not only is it mind boggling that it got sent so far in the wrong direction of its intended destination, but because nothing should have been able to get in to Guam period.

You QUITE LITERALLY could not have sent these cookies to Guam if you tried.

[theconcealedweapon]

[the-forest-library]

[the-forest-library]

Love it when a post finds its intended audience