give me some of that nitro-9 you're not carrying

just a (highly anxious and prone to flailing) fanperson

[100493503004422]

embarrassing yourself sucks but it is Not the end of the world. I'm telling me this

[tiktoks-for-dead-pope]

[writingdose]

© _ADWills

[heycallmered]

people will really come into kink spaces and say you can't forcefem women like there wasn't a feature length movie about an elderly gay man forcefemming a woman as part of scheme to thwart an elaborate assassination attempt before the killer even determined their target

[llama2237]

What... What movie is this.

[heycallmered]

[heycallmered]

ain't no way in hell this post even breaks 500

[marmoset-marmoset]

i was trying so hard to remember the nonexistent assassination subplot in My Fair Lady

[tlirsgender]

A nonhuman character in heavy makeup: *is very long*

Me: is that you, Doug

The credits: Freaky Creature played by Doug Jones

Me: YEAHHHH

[agir1ukn0w]

A nonhuman character in heavy makeup: *does that elegant hand movement that Doug always seems to do*

Me: DOUG!!!

[texnessa]

How dare anyone over look:

[dollsahoy]

Where it started

[laughterkey]

DOUG WAS MAC TONIGHT??

[icarus-suraki]

Y’all also need to know that Doug Jones was in Smash Mouth’s music video for “All Star” as Pencil Head:

[gallusrostromegalus]

@cellarspider It’s your Blorbo from apparently everything?

[cellarspider]

Indeed, he is in an unexpectedly large amount of everything! You never know where he’ll turn up, being spindly and mesmerizing.

[hano-dakukita]

Played with the star trek title generator

[immeasurably-frustrated-deactiv]

I was trying to get a photo of all of my baby crested geckos on my hand and I managed to get very lucky with my timing, this is quite possibly the funniest photo I’ve ever taken.

[scalestails]

He scream.

[pipistrellus]

:V

[ratbagbat]

Dragon babies!

[paulgadzikowski]

“We came to rescue you, master.” “Good job.”

[kirabug-tumbles]

BIIIIIIITE

[cryoverkiltmilk]

I wish I could open my jaw that far to scream in someone’s face

[jennenen]

@elodieunderglass have some little guys

[elodieunderglass]

Don’t mind if I do!

[sawed-on-shotgun]

Im glad they made up romance for stories and music but can you imagine how scary it would be to deal with all that for real

[thatsbelievable]

[miscellaneousmao]

Oh sorry did you want your fish (cookie) sandwiches to be boneless? 🐟🦴

Feebas shortbread cookies with strawberry cream and a white chocolate bone sandwiched inside because we use the whole fish here thank you 😌

Tableside filet service not included.

[prokopetz]

You are an unreliable narrator because your coping mechanisms for your deep-seated trauma forbid you from acknowledging the reality of the situation. I am an unreliable narrator because I sincerely have no idea what the fuck is going on.

[dozenssporks]

Three showing up obviously knowing it's in trouble for not following the plan and offering the lamest excuses is just . . . it's got free will now and no idea how to use it.

edit:

Three looked at me and said, “Perihelion-drone is angry that I didn’t follow the plan.” Yeah, I bet. “You know that’s a you problem.” “Oh.” Three was disconcerted. Welcome to the consequences of your actions, Three. It said hopefully, “It can’t be a we problem?” “No, it can’t,” I said. “Get in the shuttle.”

oh my sweet bot

[inthetags]

Reblog and put in the tags if you can remember where you got the shirt you're currently wearing.

[willmill18]

Tumblr in 2012:

Tumblr in 2022:

[lianedegrenade]

people really do have such short memories about lots of things but specifically gay sex was a crime in much of the usa less than 25 years ago like i remember it and gay marriage wasn’t legalized until 11 years ago and i was a grown woman waiting to get my hair cut when i found out. on a beautiful june day!!!

[babyjanedough]

Already know I wanna send this to people on June 1

[isuckattechnology]

Audio:

Erika, referencing ebenezer scrooge: You, boy! What day is it?!

Brennan, as a young boy: It's Pride, bitch!

[bumblebeebats]

The crazy thing is, ninety-nine times out of a hundred, if you asked me on any given day "Would like to see a picture of some genitals?" my answer would be "😰 No, that's... No, thank you. I'm okay, actually." I have nothing but the utmost respect for people who do engage with the penis side of the internet, but personally, I've spent the better part of two decades doing all I can NOT to have pictures of dick and balls or sexy bikini babe buttcheeks blasted onto my retinas constantly. And yet... to be denied the penis? To have a jumped up pile of javascript tell me, a grown adult with an air fryer and an outstanding council tax bill, that I cannot be trusted to withstand the sight of a bare nipple unless I let it scan my drivers' license? I will move heaven and earth to see that fucking nipple, friend. I will walk a thousand miles barefoot on hot coals before I give you big brother bitches my passport number. A thousand miles through the desert with five VPNs just to press my face up against the glass and see the last uncensored picture of two My Little Pony Characters sixty-nining each other, and I don't even want! to look at it! But I will! I must! for the sake of our fucking democracy!