An Overthinker's Ponderings

Pretty much as you would guess

[sepulchritude]

on the topic of humans being the intergalactic “hold my beer” species: imagine an alien stepping onto a human starship and seeing a space roomba™ with a knife duct taped onto it, just wandering around the ship

it doesn’t have any special intelligence. it’s just a normal space roomba. there are other space roombas on the ship and they don’t have knives. it’s just this one. knife space roomba has full clearance to every room in the ship. occasionally crew members will be talking and then suddenly swear and clutch their ankle. knife space roomba putters off, leaving them to their mild stab wounds.

“what is the point?” asks the alien as another crew member casually steps over the knife-wielding robot. “is it to test your speed and agility?”

“no it doesn’t really go that fast,” replies the captain.

“does it teach you to stay ever-vigilant?”

“I mean I guess so but that’s more of a side effect.”

“does it weed out the weak? does it protect you from invaders? do repeated stabbings let your species heal more quickly in the future?”

“it doesn’t stab very hard, it gets us more than it gets our enemies, and no, but that sounds cool — someone write that down.”

“but then what is its purpose?”

“I don’t know,” the captain says, leaning down to give the space roomba an affectionate pat. “it just seemed cool”

[aethersea]

this is the dumbest idea I’ve ever heard but I thought about it for five seconds and realized that if I were, say, a random communications officer onboard this ship and someone taped a knife to a roomba it would take maybe three weeks before even I was inordinately fond of Stabby. I would be proud of Stabby when I met up with my other spacefleet friends for space coffee, I would tell them about the time Stabby got the second mate in the ankle five seconds before the fleet admiral beamed on board and she swore in seven different languages in front of high command. 

also by the fourth day Stabby would be in the ship’s log, he’d have little painted-on insignia, people would salute him as he went by, and someone would hook up a twitter account to tweet maniacal laughter and/or a truly terrible knock-knock joke every time he managed to nick someone.

[tallteal]

Omg so the ting I typed up might actually happen this is gold

[petralemaitre]

I am suddenly astonished that Stabby isn’t Farscape canon. 1812 was weird enough.

[dearthoughthenightisgone]

Stabby’s little charging dock would start accruing cuddly toys and commemorative holo-vids of Stabby’s greatest stabs. Its insignia would start off at a fairly low rank, but soon, without anyone every discussing it, everyone would know that Stabby got to take the rank of the highest ranking crew member it stabbed. The ceremony for Flag Admiral Stabby was beautiful. The captain gave a speech. 

[jumpingjacktrash]

why am i proud of stabby this is irrational

[bisectedbrioche]

INCIDENT LOG: 46-7-2 Action #45437: Desc: Covert enemy boarding attempt

Details: Six (6) members of a Mercenary/Pirate crew of little renown attempted to infiltrate ship in order to steal equipment and/or personnel.

Prior to being detained they had remained undetected for eight (8) hours and accumulated several high value materials (see attached log), and incapacitated and restrained several crewmen (see attached log) in dock #3, with the intention of using a life boat to exfiltrate.

Just prior to their would-be escape, the boarding party encountered the ship’s mascot. A cleaning unit which had been modified by crew members to mount a traditional Terran melee weapon, as well as an officer’s insignia (having been jokingly given a commission by the Captain the night before). Curious, one picked it up, before realising the mounted weapon had a nickel finish (highly toxic to their species) on the handle, and dropped it in a panic.

As the unit’s anti-impact sensors had been disabled, it immediately tried to right itself on landing. This caused it to flip over and slash the third knee of the boarder who dropped it, prompting the rest of the boarders to flee. In doing so, they tripped over a waste container, causing the unit to “chase” them, as it collected the trail of dust they left.

The security crew were alerted to the boarding party’s presence by an entry on “Sargent Stabby’s Hit List” - an account on an intership microblogging site which automatically logs any injuries caused by the cleaning unit in question - and quickly intercepted them.

Casualties: Four (4) crewmen treated for minor lacerations sustained after detaining boarding party, one (1) captured crewman treated for negative reaction to sedatives used by captors.

Belligerent status: Two (2) members of the enemy boarding party remain in stable condition in sickbay. Three (3) remaining surrendered peacefully and remain in the brig. One (1) refuses to leave the safety of a storage cupboard he went to ground in.

Recommendations/Actions:

All captured guards to undergo debriefing and possible disciplinary action for breaches of security protocol.

Remind all crew members to report missing colleagues immediately.

Retain a guard outside cleaning storage room 87 until the final boarder can be coaxed out and properly detained.

Cleaning unit D4.87 AKA “Sargent Stabby” has been promoted to Quartermaster, and is now considered the superior officer of all autonomous drones on the ship. All Class #1 drones have been programmed to salute their superior with their effector, should it enter the room while they’re active.

[theotheristhedoctor]

Ok but what about that final bit - all the other space roombas respectfully standing to the side and saluting when Quatermaster Stabby comes past?

[flyingwerecats]

Quartermaster Stabby goes on to have many more adventures and many more promotions.

Quartermaster Stabby becomes a famous icon of the human race, proof that humans can and often are unintentionally terrifying, but maybe there actually IS something to their strange attachments to inanimate objects…?

Aliens are now convinced that humans have some weird psychic/aura powers or something. “Object Tamers” they call us. Humans are so amused that they adopt the term for themselves. They love it. They start printing it on bracelets and T-shirts. Aliens can’t tell if this is a joke or a confession.

Through a disturbing number of coincidences like the above, aliens begin to fear Quartermaster Stabby and are legitimately unsure if it has intelligence or not. It doesn’t help that humans refuse to break the joke to explain it to them.

Alien scientists try to explain the strange phenomenon that is Quartermaster Stabby. They cannot. Humans are delighted.

Quartermaster Stabby is eventually promoted to a position of authority over all autonomous drones in the entire human empire. It also escaped the ship once and managed to become the mayor of a small alien city. That city has since begun using the fact as a tourist attraction, and the episode has brought to human attention the fact that Mayor Stabby technically fulfills all of the criteria necessary to become a president or council member. (Minus the sentience.)

Humans are now trying to vote Mayor Stabby into office, using the aliens’ inability to determine its sentience level to their advantage.

They are successful. Counselor Stabby is most universally beloved representative of the human race. (Among humans, anyway. The aliens have mixed reactions, ranging from amusement, to fear, to outrage.)

Counselor Stabby goes on to somehow reveal a corrupt plot among several other counsel members and essentially averts a huge political catastrophe, all because one of the spies dropped her earring and Counselor Stabby ate it. The earring was bugged. Good call, Counselor Stabby.

Every time Counselor Stabby breaks down and has to be repaired, trillions of humans flood its social media accounts with ‘get well’ messages, and many flowers and gifts are sent to the repair bay or to its charging station.

Counselor Stabby has somehow blundered its way into receiving all of the highest honors that can be bestowed by human society. It helps run an empire. It saves lives. It cleans donut crumbs off of the floor without being asked.

All without a single sentient thought.

Counselor Stabby becomes legend.

[dixeyray]

The humans have started a campaign to use Counselor Stabby as a model to create better bots. 

“Why does a human’s consideration for a ‘better bot’ mean more knives, sir?” the young ambassador said, staring at the contraption in front of him. 

“ we are unsure of their purpose, we have many reports of these creations protecting their home ships. “ The advisor said also staring at the contraptions many spinning blades. 

The residing human walked into the room squealing, quite to loud for the ambassador’s taste, at the contraption. 

“ Aren’t you just a spinning bundle of death! “ The human cried out happily? (The ambassador was still unsure of humans deployment of emotions.) The delivery droid, with knife blades above its propellors, bobbed up and down before depositing it’s ‘gift’ (as the human called it) and leaving through the bot-hatch with a frightening scream accompanying it.

Thes humans, they were, well, humans. The ambassador would need to read more on their culture to even remotely understand them. 

[spacefaringviking]

**STABBY**

[future-ghosts]

*buzzes happily*

[baddiemode]

[mjandersen]

I have been here, multiple times!  By referring to the order as a “Little Rosa”, you don’t have to make as big a deal out of the fact that you’re seeking help.

And believe it or not, it gets better. Rosa’s also gives out sweatshirts to the homeless (or sells them to the general public) that has information on local soup kitchens and even computer training in the area, on an insert sewn inside the sweatshirt.

(Details)

[jessicalprice]

Reblogged again for these excellent details.

[aviouslyy]

Also you can buy slices for the homeless through their online store, from anywhere, not just PA!

[royaleomens]

here is the link for anyone who wants to buy slices for the homeless

[pardonmewhileipanic]

thank you for the comment about buying online! I am in canada but would love to help

PLEASE SIGNAL BOOST

[date-a-jew-suggestions]

If you would report an undocumented immigrant to ICE you would have reported me to the Nazis and I don’t fucking trust you

[prismatic-bell]

A note:

I live in a state where you “have to” report anyone you suspect of being undocumented (that wonderful hellhole of Arizona). Now in practice this law has fallen far short, thank goodness. But if you live in such a place and they start enforcing it, here is how you get around it:

Assume everyone who doesn’t speak English is visiting.

Never ask about their job, because if they tell you they work here then you know they’re not visiting. You see them a lot for several weeks or months? Hm. Someone in the family must be ill. That’s terribly tough. They always dress in old, ratty laborers’ clothes? I feel you, my dude, I can’t afford new clothes either, and my dad has the fashion sense of an aardvark, so sometimes it’s not even about “affording” them. They say they’ve been here for years? You must have misunderstood. Spanish isn’t your first language, after all. First and last name? It never came up, or you don’t recall–you meet a lot of people.

And then, if you’re asked: no, you haven’t seen anyone residing illegally in the United States. Just people visiting.

[date-a-jew-suggestions]

Very good very important addition

[appropriately-inappropriate]

Essentially, this is the civil society version of a work-to-rule strike.

Don’t do more than is expressly asked of you, and do what you are asked with such an intense attention to protocol that not asking you at all becomes more effective than even bothering.

In this case:

“Have you seen an illegal immigrant?”

“Could you describe an illegal immigrant, officer?”

*officer describes a person who is in the country without appropriate paperwork, or who has crossed the border illegally*

“No, sir, I haven’t seen any illegal immigrant.”

And this is correct. You have NOT seen an illegal immigrant, because you have no way of knowing if Jose Fulano is here legally or not. And since you can’t see his paperwork (or lack thereof), and did not personally see him cross the border illegally, you are only answering precisely the question asked.

[dancingwiththelostboys]

I’m not American, and I have like, three followers, but this is important.

[thelawfulchaotic]

So, I’m a lawyer, who deals with immigration though does not specialize in it. But here’s the thing(s): 

1) Even someone who’s working could be here on a migrant (or other sort of) visa (hey, there are a few thousand per year, and *someone*’s got to get them, right?) or could be waiting for their case to resolve in immigration court, after having come to America to join a born or naturalized American family member. 

2) Even people who are working improperly could have come into the country legally – and just overstayed their visa or be violating the conditions of their visa, and you have no idea what the niggly little regulations that govern that might be. 

3) If a law enforcement officer asks you about a neighbor/friend/etc., take this moment to remind them that, unlike them, you cannot ask a random person off the street for their ID and be entitled to a response. 

4) Even if someone has told you that they are undocumented, you still don’t know, do you? Humans lie all the time. How could you know for sure? You can’t, because they can’t prove that they have a lack of papers. Just because you haven’t seen papers doesn’t mean they don’t exist! 

5) Don’t ever talk to cops in general. Why are you talking to a cop? Stop that, as soon as it is safe and feasible. 

Love,

a very tired public defender

[hafael-archive]

[unicornempire]

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMHm!

[we-are-star-stuff]

Herd immunity is the idea that if enough people get immunized against a disease, they’ll create protection for even those who aren’t vaccinated. This is important to protect those who can’t get vaccinated, like immunocompromised children. 

You can see in the image how low levels of vaccination lead to everyone getting infected. Medium levels slow down the progression of the illness, but they don’t offer robust protection to the unvaccinated. But once you reach a high enough level of vaccination, the disease gets effectively road-blocked. It can’t spread fast enough because it encounters too many vaccinated individuals, and so the majority of the population (even the unvaccinated people) are protected.

Find out more here.

[sciteachers]

#vaccinateyourfxckingkids

[famallama1]

The other thing this doesn’t show is that if the virus can take a foothold in enough people it has the opportunity to mutate and then even be able to infect the people that did get vaccinated.

[bloodytales]

There are people who can’t receive vaccines for legitimate medical reasons (such as being on meds that supress their immune system, people going through chemotherapy, and very young children whose bodies aren’t strong enough yet). Herd immunity is what protects those people.

Herd immunity is a social responsibility to protect both yourself, your family, and the people who can’t protect themselves.

Vaccinate your fucking children.

[stutterhug]

So I doodled one of these then instantly became obsessed with the idea and can’t stop and have been spamming twitter with brain wolf facts sorry everyone.

[showtimechamaco]

[safitheartist]

Power move.

[newtgeiszler]

one of the most aesthetically beautiful displays of protest i’ve seen

[did-you-know]

A painter in Los Angeles kept missing his exit for the I-5 on the 110 highway, so he did his research, climbed up the overhead sign, and changed it himself without anyone noticing.

This is Richard Ankrom. He couldn’t find his damn exit, cuz it wasn’t properly labelled.  

So he took life by the balls, like any self-respecting Californian would do, and used his sign-painting expertise to fix it himself.

He called it ‘guerilla public service.’ Even got himself an outfit to look official. It worked, obvi.

Caltrans investigated, but the sign was actually up to code. They left it there for 8 years before they made an updated sign.

Source Source 2

[amarettosweet]

[asgardreid-deactivated20180407]

You can do anything if you’re wearing a hi-vis vest and hard hat.

[eclipsebykimlipmp3-deactivated2]

chaotic good

[vampires-and-witches]

I saw everyone on twitter tearing Emma Watson apart for saying she’s self - partnered instead of single and decided to watch her interview for British Vogue to know what the hell was she trying to say with that. I was very surprised to find a 30 minute video in which amongst other things she talks about the following:

She felt undeserving when she was appointed as UN Women goodwill ambassador and sought out Gloria Steinem to learn about feminist activism.

She thinks the criticism she received for being a white feminist was useful because it made her educate herself.

She says there’s a desperate need to reform the education system in the UK to change the way they are taught the history of how Britain has been involved in foreign affairs and how they profited from slavery.

She felt anxious about approaching 30 because there’s a lot of pressure to have a husband and a baby by then and she’s still figuring her life out.

She was so young when she was casted in Harry Potter that she doesn’t remember much of her life before it and she went to therapy to deal with her issues with fame. She used to feel very guilty for being unhappy because she thought she should enjoy fame more.

The interviewer is a transgender woman and they discuss transgender issues for a while. Emma is in regular contact with a trans child which makes the topic of trans rights emotional for her because she’s very anxious for this kid’s safety.

She talks about her role as Meg March in the new Little Women movie and defends that unlike what many people say choosing to be a wife and a mother doesn’t make Meg a less feminist character and quotes a line from the movie, “Just because my dreams are different than yours it doesn’t mean they are unimportant.”  

She wishes more people would realize she’s not Hermione Granger but also understands why they want to see that in her because Hermione is a symbol for her too.

She used to think she could never be happy without a partner and now that she has learnt to navigate that better and is genuinely happy single she’s started to think of herself as self - partnered in contrast to the time when she thought of herself as single = lonely.

Every media outlet decided to focus in an out of context quote from the three minutes she talked about her dating life when the actual interview had a lot of depth and way more important things were discussed. I’m sad and angry but not surprised.

[dandiliiontea-deactivated202105]

Also self-partnered is just a good term.

[wyvern-lain-deactivated20220315]

when I saw the term self-partnered it made me realise that I should give the same amount of energy I would give to help and support a significant other to help and support myself

[fred-erick-frankenstein]

[…]choosing to be a wife and a mother doesn’t make Meg a less feminist character and quotes a line from the movie, “Just because my dreams are different than yours it doesn’t mean they are unimportant.”

Take notes, kids. THIS is real feminism! Giving people the choice (rights etc.) to choose what they want to be!!!

[babygoose-deactivated20240106]

i just want one (1) original post of mine to be famous

[fyeahspiderman]

#he’s doing his best bonus:

[theequeerstrian]

I can’t reblog without these tags? These are an integral part of the post.

[no-mere-mortals]

Everyone in Peter’s class gets super hyped when they see Spider-Man on the news the day before an exam because that teacher will just coincidentally forget every copy of the test at home, what a shame, guess you all have one more night to study oh well,,,,,, if any of you were doing important things yesterday it’s real lucky you get this extra time to prepare,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

[winteriron-trash]

No no no, imagine this, but on an angstier level.

Post-IW, Peter has awful PTSD because duh. The wrong thing being brought up can trigger flashbacks and memories and he hates it.

Peter’s classmates all saw Spider-Man disappear with Iron Man onto the big spaceship donut and didn’t come back until after everyone was brought back from dust. They don’t know what happened to him and they’re sure they probably don’t want to know. So they take extra care to try and not accidentally trigger anything for him.

Someone mentions Footloose and Peter nearly loses it on the spot? The entire class makes the collective decision to never bring it up again, who cared about the movie anyways.

A list in the Discord serve is complied of every possible trigger for Peter. Anything from words that make him jumpy, to topics that make him need to run to the bathroom and have a panic attack. It’s extensive and constantly updated, but it’s worth it. If Spider-Man is going to protect New York, the least they can do is try to protect Spider-Man.

[laswellspup]

This post got so much better but so much worse

[quirkyambintrovert]

I have tears in my eyes

[yermemeblog]

When you’re a duck and have places to be, but safety is key

[pikaglove]

I literally saw a goose do a similar thing while I was on the highway going to work

[tall-kiwi-nerd]

Omg

[cerix-the-gray-prince]

They are learning

[counterpunches]

#respectful law abiding birds

[tsuki-chibi]

These birds are smarter than like 70% of the students at my university.

[princesstigerbelle]

Reblog the Princess ™ for future happiness and mental stability. Let her cuteness cleanse you.

[valkoswolf]

please princess™… i require your stability and happiness

[princesstigerbelle]

She is listening

[urworstenigma]

She is like my jesus

[princesstigerbelle]

@urworstenigma

[growasmileforawhile-deactivated]

[imm0bulus-blog]

I started following this girl and her whole dash ended up these. And her last post. I can’t even say words. Anons took her life. If that okay with you, then carry on with your day. If you agree this is unacceptable and okay, then reblog and spread the word. What you say can actually change a persons life! So help out

I don’t care if this makes your dash look ‘ugly’, no matter what type of blog you have you should reblog it.

[gr9--gatsby]

If you can’t reblog this, I pity you as a human being.

[sockiepie-deactivated20170426]

;~;

[ask-doctor-jadusable-deactivate]

[blood-blossom]

This is sickening. This is why I fuckin hate most anons. Most are just pure assholes. Bullies. But I realized something. They only hate on others cause their life is miserable. So they make others miserable to try and be happy. They need something to vent their pain on

[bongsausage]

No…..I will always Reblog this….This just isn’t right

[rayyyyofsunshineeeee]

if you don’t reblog shame on you..

[circasim]

So honestly think twice, and even actually think way moooooore than twice before sending anon hate and ending up being a cyber murderer…

[pixelunivairse]

[ladyhayny]

Okay, I never reblog things, but this? people have no excuse to be treating others like that, nothing can justify your terrible actions, you horrible people, I feel so mad at those assholes.. I mean come on! The world would be a better place if you kept your shitty opinions for you, it’s not my fault if you’re an asshole but at least you could keep it for yourself instead of making the world an ugly place….

[wisepineapple]

reblog this. reblog.right.NOW

[noticeeverything-saynothing-dea]

Please don’t take your life because some anonymous asshole told you that you were ugly. The reason they had to stay anonymous is because they are scared of you.

[delicious-ticklish-guys]

Is there any way for tumblr to find the people behind all these anons????? They could be complicit in a murder! Charge them!

[twomario-deactivated20190321]

Just… Wow.

This is such a sad way to remind us how fatal the words can be..

[futuristicallysassytragedy]

If you have EVER EVER done this to someone I want you the fuck off my blog and the fuck off this site, because there is no place for you in this fucking world, and there is certainly no place for you here

[songbird7447]

You know all those people who said she ugly ARE the ugly one. Inside and outside. There also murdermers. They deserve to die in hell in the most horrible way and I wish they will die in the most horrible way in the world. And I’m sure the poor girl was beautiful and an amazing person. So you now what

FUCK YOU ANONS!!

[fan-art-maker]

always reblog

[goddess-of-the-gay-unicorns-dea]

Congratulations anons, you just took away a families life having their baby die. How? Everyone is crushed that their child has gotten bullied and because of it they’re not living anymore. That person could have helped you so much in the future but you threw away that chance! You have invented a new kind of stupid a damage you can never undo kid of stupid an open all the cages at the zoo kinda stupid! Truly you didn’t thing it through kind of stupid

[sass41]

Please reblog this. This is very important.

[yunayin35]

…

[ruby-haitay-deactivated20181223]

…..

[toku-zaki]

…………i….miss….it…

[galaxiaspruce]

What is wrong with our world

[i-feel-fantastic-deactivated202]

Fucking cowards.

[bluthatesfabrikk]

How dare them ?

[helly-watermelonsmellinfellon]

If you have to spread hate under an anonymous name, you’re a coward and I think we all know who the world would be better off without.

[power-chords]

So, when my maternal grandmother died, we had to find loving, permanent homes for all five of her cats because otherwise she would have risen from the grave to kill the entire family. We took in Chloe because Chloe was my grandmother’s favorite, and she made my mom promise to look after her. Now my mother treats Chloe like her third child, and the cat is basically plastered to her 24/7 when she isn’t hiding from some imagined enemy like the dustbuster or my dad’s footsteps.

Anyway, we wound up giving the rest of the cats to this couple that runs a joint called Kitty Korner. They try to find loving homes for all the cats they take in, but will care for the unadoptables (read: assholes) for the rest of their lives. That’s great, because one of the cats we gave to these poor women was Tobey. I have no idea why my grandmother ever adopted Tobey. He was a huge schmuck. The most handsome orange tomcat you ever saw, and he loved to crawl in your lap. But if you ever tried to touch him, he would switch immediately into Kill Mode and you could say goodbye to your hand. Needless to say, having him in your lap was awkward. It was like holding a bomb.

Kitty Korner sends us detailed letters every year to give us updates on how Tobey’s doing. Basically, they are status reports on how much of a douche Tobey is and continues to be. These women are saints. I guess they really like cats, because these letters are like a full page of single-spaced text. But more or less, they amount to:

2003: Tobey has a real colorful personality! But, uh, we don’t think he’s suited for adoption yet

2004: Nope, still not suited for adoption

2005: I think this is pretty much a lost cause

2006: WTF

2007: Tobey is trying to kill us and every other cat in the house

2008: Tobey is still trying to kill us and every other cat in the house

2009: Tobey is a vicious dictator and can only find pleasure in the subjugation of other organisms

BUT!!!! The past few years, Tobey has apparently been making steady improvement. And in our most recent letter, we have been informed that he is no longer doing things like venturing upstairs expressly to beat the living shit out of the other cats at Kitty Korner. He will also let you pet him, and when he’s had enough he’ll give a warning nip instead of removing your limb. In fact, Tobey, at a ripe old age of 14, is ready for a new home! With an experienced cat owner, comes the necessary caveat, and like… no kids. At all. Ever. Or other cats, probably. But at least he’s no longer a psychopath.

[power-chords]

WE GOT ANOTHER LETTER FROM KITTY KORNER AND WE THOUGHT TOBEY HAD FINALLY KICKED THE BUCKET BUT IN FACT HE HAS FOUND A NEW HOME, AT AGE 16, WITH AN ELDERLY MAN WHO RECENTLY LOST HIS OWN CAT.

I MAY CRY.

[power-chords]

2/1/2016: old man Tobey still loving his forever home :’)

[dispetrichordia]

Amazing

[geekerypeekery]

The adoption story to end all adoption stories. Hey, does Kitty Korner have a Kickstarter anywhere?

[power-chords]

The outpouring of love for this post is amazing! I’m going to cry at the office.

They do not have a Kickstarter, however, as a no-kill foster home run exclusively through volunteer work, they always welcome donations and you also have the ability to sponsor a cat. You’ll get detailed photos and status reports on your kitty, and should he or she get a happy ending like Tobey, you’ll be the first to know!

My grandmother was a card-carrying crazy cat lady until the day she died, and she was a big supporter of Kitty Corner. The women who run it are as devoted to rescue animals as she was her entire life. Wherever she is now, she’d be humbled to know just how many people were touched by Tobey’s comeback story.

[kimmyspetals]

I’m not crying, you are… 😭😭😭

[tittytron]

tumblr friendships are hard to maintain like im sorry i know i havent talked to you in 5 months but you’re still super rad and i still consider us friends im just dumb

[ironbound-oberon]

#if you’re wondering if this is for you #it’s probably for you

[lifeisaroughjourney]

If I have ever messaged you or messaged me and never heard from me again, I still consider us friends. I just suck

[coffee-alien]

“Imagine having a child that refuses to hug you or even look you in the eyes”

Imagine being shamed, as a child, for not showing affection in a way that is unnatural or even painful for you. Imagine being forced, as a child, to show affection in a way that is unnatural or even painful for you. Imagine being told, as a child, that your ways of expressing affection weren’t good enough. Imagine being taught, as a child, to associate physical affection with pain and coercion.

[samayla]

As a preschool special ed para, this is very important to me. All my kids have their own ways of showing affection that are just as meaningful to them as a hug or eye contact is to you or me. 

One gently squeezes my hand between both of his palms as he says “squish.” I reciprocate. When he looks like he’s feeling sad or lost, I ask if I can squish him, and he will show me where I can squish him. Sometimes it’s almost like a hug, but most of the time, it’s just a hand or an arm I press between my palms. Then he squishes my hand in return, says “squish,” and moves on. He will come ask for squishes now, when he recognizes that he needs them.

Another boy smiles and sticks his chin out at me, and if he’s really excited, he’ll lean his whole body toward me. The first time he finally won a game at circle time, he got so excited he even ran over and bumped chins with me. He now does it when he sees me outside of school too. I stick out my chin to acknowledge him, and he grins and runs over and I lean down for a chin bump.

Yet another child swings my hand really fast. At a time when another child would be seeking a hug, she stands beside me and holds my hand, and swings it back and forth, with a smile if I’m lucky. The look on her face when I initiate the hand swinging is priceless.

Another one bumps his hip against mine when he walks by in the hallway or on the playground, or when he gets up after I’m done working with him. No eye contact, no words, but he goes out of his way to “crash” into me, and I tell him that it’s good to see him. He now loves to crash into me when I’m least expecting it. He doesn’t want anything, really. Just a bump to say “Hi, I appreciate you’re here.” And when he’s upset and we have to take a break, I’ll bump him, ask if he needs to take a walk, and we just go wander for a bit and discuss whatever’s wrong, and he’s practically glued to my side. Then one more bump before we go back into the room to face the problem.

Moral of the story is, alternative affection is just as valid and vitally important as traditional affection. Reciprocating alternative affection is just as valid and vitally important as returning a hug. That is how you build connections with these children. 

[tobiblack]

I just . . this is amazing, and wonderful, and should be posted everywhere where there are people and shown to everyone who thinks there is one way to show affection - by eye contact or hug.