Served cunt, caused problems, took names, healed generational trauma, made bank, gave face, rode dick, a whole MOTHER (metaphorically and literally) at the age of 20.
Penelope Bridgerton; they can never make me hate you.

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he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
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"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

tannertan36
$LAYYYTER
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
DEAR READER
almost home

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
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izzy's playlists!

#extradirty
Sweet Seals For You, Always

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Not today Justin
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@shaybaebae
Served cunt, caused problems, took names, healed generational trauma, made bank, gave face, rode dick, a whole MOTHER (metaphorically and literally) at the age of 20.
Penelope Bridgerton; they can never make me hate you.
Is it really Christmas Eve if your family isn’t making you cry?
Oddly specific. Got a deposit for 6,837 today
fuck it, i never ever do those “reblog for X, this one really works!” posts, but this one doesn’t have any of that BS, this is just straight up wishing us good things; and then the comment doesn’t even say any of that either. Zero claims on this post, all positive vibes
May you end this week feeling ever more certain of a future you’ll love
May you end this week feeling ever more certain of a future you’ll love
big heart, bigger dick, biggest bank account
hoe for this man
Esme really grabbed the bag with this one
sitting around wasting my 20s while thinking about how i sat around and wasted my teens
i am YELLING
Santa is on strike due to global warming. All presents this year will be delivered by Sasha the Christmas Tiger. Milk and cookies may not be sufficient.
“MUST BRING PRESENTS TO GOOD CHILDREN”
“Yes good”
“AND EAT THE BAD ONES”
“Wait no”
“EAT THEM”
“sasha no”
@burstofhope the Christmas tiger is watching
She is making a list
It is not easy with her paws but she is making it
shes almost here
Okay fine this is the ONE Christmas thing I will reblog before Thanksgiving BUT THAT’S IT
SASHA’S BACK ON MY DASH!
Y’all better behave, you have two months
You better watch out
You better watch out
You better watch out
You better watch out
Sasha!!!!!!
…ok how can I get my family on board so this is my nephews’ Christmas tradition, because that would be fuckin’ rad
“oh, Santa? yeah ok, sounds fake. I get visits from Sasha the Christmas Tiger and my continued existence is proof that I’m excellent. you just have a magic grandpa that’ll cave and give you stuff regardless”
THE AVENGERS (2012) | BLACK WIDOW (2021)
He can mimic anyone he’s ever seen. It’s like fighting a mirror.
i wish we could have subtitles in real life bc i really can’t hear anything anyone is saying to me
Steve Irwin would have been able to lift Mjolnir, reblog if you agree.
In a shocking twist of events…. melodrama over comedy?? We out here giving Bella and Edward genuine romantic believability in 2020. Let them just be in love!
Read more Twilight But Okayer! | Twitter | Instagram | Ko-fi
it’s About That Time
AU where Bella doesn’t TELL Edward that she knows, she just strolls into lunch one day and goes “hey guys, I’ve got a question for the table. Just for funsies, you know, just totally off the top of my head. Would you fuck a vampire, yes or no? I vote Yes.” And then stares across the cafeteria without blinking while Edward chokes.
OP if I write a fanfic can I use this bc YES.
THIS TOOK SO LONG TO FIND OMG.
Anyways here is the long awaited fic that I wrote….hope you all like it.
Once again, I sat with my siblings at the normal lunch table. It was the normal routine with the normal idle and incessant chatter all around us. The only thing that changed was that my attention was being constantly diverted to the cafeteria doors as I waited for Bella to arrive.
It had been a long weekend due to the sudden appearance of spring and the sun that banished me to the shadows, unable to get within the 20 feet stretch from the woods to Bella’s house. I missed talking to her, and I knew that lunch might be my first opportunity to do so.
“Good thing your power isn’t laser vision Eddie, or else that door would be up in flames” Emmett teased me, as his massive hand clapped down on my shoulder causing me to turn and face him.
“Very funny” I deadpanned, narrowing my eyes further for effect. I tended to get tired of Emmett’s constant barrage of nicknames rather quickly.
“Seriously Edward, if you keep staring like a creep, you’re just going to scare the life out of that Swan girl.”
“I’m not ‘staring like a creep’ Rosalie, my eyes are just naturally resting in that direction.” I tried to defend myself from my sisters disapproving gaze. She scoffed in response. As I readied my next response to my siblings’ reactions, Mike Newton’s thoughts got more excited than his normal drone, indicating that Bella had finally entered the cafeteria.
I caught her scent as she walked with determination across the room directly to her normal lunch table without once looking up at me. I felt the familiar confusion and frustration clouding my own thoughts as she reached her table and she dropped her bag into her seat. She slammed her hands on the table, maybe trying to get the attention of her own table, but every head at my table turned towards her as well.
“Hey guys, I’ve got a question for the table. Just for funsies, you know, just totally off the top of my head. Would you fuck a vampire, yes or no? I vote Yes”
Bella’s eyes scanned the table while she began asking the question, but she quickly changed to looking me dead in the eyes as she finished, and I felt the water that I was in the middle of taking a fake drink from suddenly explode as my grip crushed the flimsy plastic.
All my siblings either began yelling at me for getting them wet, or (in Emmett’s and Alice’s case) laughing hysterically and appreciating the guts that Bella has.
And all I could wonder as I kept my gaze locked with Bella’s as she smirked lightly and sat down to the barrage of questions from her table, ranging from “What are you talking about?” to “How hot is the Vampire?”, was how in the world did she figure it out?
It was a quiet evening in the house, with everyone busying themselves with one thing or another as Edward and I sat outside enjoying the way the sunset felt on our now frozen skin.
“Hey Bella?” Edward asked as he absentmindedly twirled one of the curls in my hair, “Do you remember that day in the cafeteria when you asked your table that question about Vampires?”
“Mmm, yeah, what about it?” I sat up a little straighter to face him, and he tucked the curl behind my ear. My eyes couldn’t help but scan his face, lasting a little longer on his lips.
“I also vote Yes.” He smirked as he brushed his fingers on my shining cheek. I smiled and pulled him to me.
Thank you to @jessamine-whitlock-hale and @local-goblin-boy for looking at it for me before I posted! :) and Openbookbells for the original post!
@rochelle-the-ravenclaw
Dearly bruhloved we are swaggered here today to join these two bros in holy matrihomie.
@haletwinsstan JUDITH HOW DARE YOU LEAVE THIS IN THE TAGS