#the panda redd

[spite-and-waffles]

(alt included)

Link to Video. (Please help Panda make money.)

Video description and transcript under the cut.

Description: TikTok video by The Panda Redd. Re-enactment of final scene of Under the Hood. All roles played by Panda (a tall, well-built young white man with a mohawk, wearing a grey hoodie). Setting is a dark basement lit only by a hanging light bulb.

Transcript.

Jason: (holding gun on Bruce) "Bruce, I forgive you for not saving me."

Batman: (glares silently)

Jason: "But why? Why on God's Earth—" (hits Joker across the face)

Joker (tied to a chair): *cackles*

Jason: "—is HE still alive??"

Joker: "AHAHAHAHAHHAHA!"

Batman:

Batman: "I'm sorry, d'you want me to be serious here or—?"

Jason: (in disbelief) "YES, Bruce! I want you to be serious right now! If he had done what he did to me to you, I would've done nothing but search the earth for this pile of death-worshipping garbage!"

Joker: "I love you too, Sugar Plum."

Batman: (holds hands up) "Okay, yeah, I get that, totally, I get that. Um. Have you tried?"

Jason: "Excuse you?"

Batman: "Have you tried to kill him yet?"

Jason: (to Joker) "Is he being serious?"

Joker: (also confused) "I'm gonna be honest with you, Junior. I don't know."

Jason: "Got it. Great." (turns back to Batman) "What the fuck does THAT mean?"

Batman: "Okay, so no, you haven't. Cool. Do it."

Jason:

Jason: (lowers gun) "What."

Batman: "Do it, cap his ass. Shoot him."

Joker: (finally rattled) "I'm gonna go with Junior here, and say...what??"

Jason: "You want me to shoot him?"

Batman: "I want someone to shoot him! Give me the gun, I'll do it!"

Jason: (mutters, brain blue screening) "What is going on right now? This should a lot harder than it is."

Batman: "C'mon, son! You decapitated like eleven people three days ago! Fuckin' do it!"

Joker: (turns to Jason quizzically) "This has gotta be some sort of test, ri—"

(BANG! Jason fires. Joker lands on the floor lifeless, eyes still open.)

Jason: "There, you happy? Jesus. Was that so hard? All of this time and it was THAT easy!"

Jason: "What the fuck is that supposed to—" (looks down at floor where the Joker was lying)

Batman: "I don't know what you're talking about 'easy'. There's nothing there." (nods at floor)

Floor: (is devoid of Joker)

Jason: (stares)

Floor: (continues to be sans anything but carpet)

Jason: "What the fuck?"

Batman: "Yeah."

Jason: "WHAT THE FUCK?"

Batman: "Take as long as you need with this."

Jason: (looking around frantically) "I just shot him! He hit the floor! What the f—" (turns back to the floor)

Floor: (is just vibin')

Jason: "Where the fuck did he go??"

Batman: "See that shit? That shit right there happens every fucking time!"

Jason: "There's not even a blood stain! It's just gone!"

Batman: "Yeah, like two days after you died, I chased him into a helicopter where he got shot like six times. The helicopter exploded and crashed into the ocean. And his body was gone before Superman could find it."

Jason: "Oh my God. I don't understand how this is even fucking possible!"

Batman: "He's like a cryptid! I don't fucking get it!"

Joker: (disembodied laughter) "AHAHAHAHA HAHAHA!"

Jason: (freaked out, turning in circles trying to find him) "Oh my God!"

Batman: "THAT OMINOUS SHIT HAPPENS TOO! I DON'T KNOW, DUDE!"

Jason: "Dude. Fuck whatever's going on here, that's some fucking bullshit."

Batman: "Thank you! Finally someone gets it!"

[thisiswhereikeepdcthings]

Hey look at that, a new episode of our favorite show.

[tallochar]

Video by The Panda Redd on TikTok

[incorrectbatfam]

When an author wants to exclude a certain character from their fic but doesn't want to ignore them completely, what excuse do they use for why they're not there? Wrong answers only

Bruce: Where is everyone?

Alfred: Master Dick has his hands tied with Bludhaven. I sent Master Damian to bed because it's a school night. Master Duke already patrolled in the daytime. Miss Barbara is preoccupied with a Birds of Prey mission. Miss Harper is building a fighter jet. Master Tim has dropped off the grid for the next 5-10 business days. Master Jason is committing his daily felony. Miss Stephanie said, and I quote, "Common Bruce L." And when I texted Miss Cassandra from your phone, she left it on read.

Bruce: I see.

Bruce: Alfred, call the guy.

[leblogreblog]

You know how's there been that post about Bruce knowing that Shazam is actually a kid and treating him as such while confusing everyone around because why Batman is so soft for this 30-something dude for no reason?

I want to see the same with Jason as Red Hood with this One Goon (ekhm-Bill-ekhm) that for some reason Knows with everyone confused why he gets to call their boss kid and this one time he catched him drinking booze he swipped it out his hand and their boss Red Hood, the same that very publicly cut off heads of several mafia leaders heads, only potuted and said he's no fun???

[shroudthecursedone]

[danitalkscomics]

The AbsoluteChaos™ that Man-Bat would bring to Gotham

Imagine being an average Joe, who is following Bat-rumours on social media (used to be called Postr but renamed to leX)

@BruceWayneOfficial: batman is evil i told you we have video proof, look at this security footage of people being killed by giant bat.

@Nightwing'sAss: That isn't Batman, we have traffic cam footage of them fighting.

@DamianWayneOfficial: That video is AI, Batman is evil.

[mogoskier]

Watch this! It is so good!