Yes, you

[shrekhollander]

Jade Pike: *Hayden, Shane and Jackie are inside the house getting food and Ilya is outside with the Pike kids and Anya* Uncle Shane, Uncle Ilya had an accident in the car... Ruby is helping him.

Shane and Hayden: *They get super concerned and get outside fast af because Ilya was showing off his Porsche to the kids, they immediately head out to see what happened*

Ilya: *Is stuck inside this thing*

[themoonandmyman]

I reblogged this earlier but I wanted to add the hilarious imagery of Ilya having to be cut out of this thing by the fire department and it makes the local news

[subcultureblues]

love when ppl ask to see pics of my axolotl and are expecting something cute + pink + all smiles and instead with genuine fear in their eyes, and in their heart, say WHAT the fuck is that.

[subcultureblues]

demon

[subcultureblues]

run.

[layne-loves-lying]

[t4timekeeper]

ACCIDENTALLY LEFT MY MACERATED APPLE SYRUP ON THE STOVE AND IT CARAMELIZED I GUESS?

[t4timekeeper]

it was super thick and dark and golden and bubbly so i took it off the heat. happy accident.

[t4timekeeper]

tastes delicious so good. idk what to do with it though

[t4timekeeper]

thank you for your recommendation! with brief consideration, it has been disregarded.

[allthatispeculiar]

[thetruemek]

[chillyfeetsteak]

[skeezels]

Chalk is squids road.

[communismlives]

[keydekyie]

"It would have been easier if you'd just said yes."

original

[robotslenderman]

Source

[tributary]

teetotailer

[judygemstone]

first incidence of good writing advice i've seen in 10+ years on this platform and it's in the notes of a mustelid wreaking absolute havoc in a german grocery store

[quietwingsinthesky]

@tedthetalk

[hartshorn-and-isinglass]

I don't know who needs to hear this, but it's time to move the frozen turkey to the trebuchet

[kingpin-of-steel-act3]

[ihatenearlyeverything]

its ok theyre Gods lil helpers

[oatmealbrain]

And boy are they clumsy

[hydrangeafae]

Hi, these bees are babies! They’re not clumsy at all, this is what is called orientation flights. After birth and before beginning their careers as foragers (as all Honey bees cycle through all the jobs in the Hive throughout their lifespan), Honey bees take short flights back and forth, to and from the Hive, to orient themselves with their wings and their home so they can learn its location and how to get back home after foraging! Everyone has to learn, these are just smol little baby turkeys. Bees use the angle of the sun for location so adults have a better and more direct sense of location than any human

[polar-solstice]

IM SO PLEASED TO LEARN THIS!!!

They are just!!! Student drivers!!! 😭

[sindri42]

BONK!

[should-be-sleeping]

[sometiktoksarevalid]

[tahthetrickster]

[cpunkhobie]

This is the funniest thing I've ever read. I would have LOVED to see that

[arbis-official]

three types of people

[edgar-allan-possum]

Maybe quantum physics is different in a universe where a mob boss built a working supercollider that could create portals to other worlds in 2018

[belethlegwen]

@abominablesnowdude's tags are too good to let vanish

[fluffysheeps]

Bumble sharks 🐝🦈

[pedantic-swedish-bunny-girl]

@catboy-tdick opinion on the bumble sharks?

[catboy-tdick]

WONDERFUL AND JOYOUS….

[ankle-beez]

[fishing-princess]

I Defeated the Demon Lord but it Turns Out the Demon Army was Largely Unaffected and I Fell Victim to a Flawed Belief in Great Man Theory

[leftcosine]

I Executed The Demon Lord With One Flawless Strike And After A Brief Power Struggle The New Demon Government Is Substantially More Committed To The War Because Of Some Reason I Don't Know

[humanfist]

I Successfully Overthrew The Demon Lord And Instituted Demon Democracy But They Voted For A Commie So The CIA Not Some Fantasy Equivalent The Actual CIA Who Have Known About Magic And Alternate Realms The Whole Damn Time But Won't Just Unisekai Me Launched A Counter Coup And That's When Things Really Went To Shit

[eliotquillon]

ass quality screenshot sorry but obsessed with foreman’s face after chase tries the whole ‘uwu if you’re going to call the police at least let me call my wife first’ guilt trip shtick at the end of the tyrant. he looks like he’s about to punch chase in the face lmfaooo

[all-pacas]

the face of a man realizing his career and possible jail time relies on Known Rat Robert Chase not throwing him under the bus to save his own ass and marriage

[memeuplift]

[athelind]

It's a d

it's a dus

It's a dust bu