Another Time Waster

Megan. 26. NC. Interested in animals, entomology, vulture culture, naps, my girlfriend, and queer shit.

[cosmicanger]

[thothoes]

clearing out my camera roll 5/?

[catchymemes]

[onceuponatmi]

Holy SHIT.

THE ONLY ONE ALLOWED TO SIT THERE SHOULD BE THE ARTIST AND THEN IT SHOULD GO BE IN A MUSEUM.

Hand made crafts should be worshipped for the art they are.

[antique-scarecrow]

i respect this SOOOOO much more than any iron sword throne chair

[callmebliss]

This one involves way more stabbing

[laylainalaska]

While walking the dog yesterday, we found the tracks of a pack of wolves that had passed across the edge of our property. (I live out in the highway in Alaska.) I took a picture of my hand next to a wolf track for comparison. 

Now here’s a picture of my hand with one of our dog’s tracks:

And he’s not an especially small dog; he’s a 55-lb retriever mix.

And the dog’s tracks next to wolf tracks:

Wolves are huge.

[weaselle]

dude, i’m tellin you, for real Sometimes people ask if my klee kai is a wolf, like, seriously. And I’m always like oh no, ha ha he kind of looks like one, though, hunh? But inside I’m always like “uh, my dog weighs thirty pounds, wolves weigh more than me and my dog put together – if he was a wolf you wouldn’t be asking if he was a wolf, you’d be peeing your pants and demanding we leave”

like, a wolf is as tall when lying down as most dogs are standing. here, see for yourself. Labs are a very dog-sized dog, wouldn’t you say? Check this out

(this is a wolf in Alaska that found an unfenced dog park and slowly over the course of months learned how to hang out and have fun with the dogs)

[weaselle]

SO BIG THO - here, have some more examples

[bogleech]

SOMETHING TO NOT FUCKING FORGET AND I DON’T THINK IT’S TOO EARLY TO REMIND ANYONE: He was at the time the most dangerously incompetent oaf to ever win U.S. presidency in anyone’s memory, he did so despite losing the popular vote with the American people, he was a laughingstock and riddled with scandal from day one, he made other countries hate us, he caused cost of living to skyrocket, his vice president was an openly homophobic warmongering maniac, he harmed environmental policy, set back health care and education, violated human rights, divided the nation, fed into racism and xenophobia and everybody you can think of from Hollywood celebrities to world leaders stood united against him. His name was George W. Bush, and after four years straight of all the above, he won another four year term by over 11 million more votes than the first one.

[thehumanarkle]

Don’t get complacent, basically.

[what-hos-there]

Do not listen to ANYONE who tells you not to vote. Do. Not. Assume that it all rides on you, that you are the last person between sanity and FOUR MORE YEARS OF THIS FUCKING JACKASS, and then vote.

[golden-reedwolf]

Taxidermy thylacine and skeleton at Tring Natural History Museum

[downwithneocolonialism]

[7elevn]

i feel like i made myself up

[1dietcokeinacan]

You did! You do! Every day! Every minute!

[regicide1997]

Maybe the real self was what we constructed along the way

[thecw4kids]

ghost in the house: GET OUT. I WILL TAKE YOU-

real estate agent: chill, its me.

ghost: oh hey. have you sold it yet.

real estate agent: obviously NOT, idiot.

[curlzformetal]

enemies to friends to lovers, 67k, ghost au

[catchymemes]

[celtic-pyro-deactivated20230725]

Australia do you take constructive criticism on your wildlife?

[glumshoe]

My cat has ice cream prescience.

I don’t know how she does it. I don’t know how she reads my intent so clearly.

When I walk to the kitchen to get a popsicle or thaw a slice of banana bread or warm up some mango slices, she doesn’t care. She stays on her chair and waits patiently.

But when I walk to the kitchen to scoop myself a bowl of ice cream, she’s at my heels SHRIEKING by the time I turn on the light. She knows. She’s not smelling it, she’s not hearing me say ‘ice cream’, she’s not accustomed to some predictable pattern because I rarely eat ice cream.

But she fucking figures out before I even reach the refrigerator. It’s the only human food she asks for, and I have to give her a small tithe of it to keep her from shredding the skin from my legs and popping my eardrums. She’s terrifying.

[cipheramnesia]

Registering the unique “ice cream gait”, try walking without rhythm so the cat will not be able to track your movements.

[glumshoe]

But what if it’s not my Ice Cream Groove… what if I excuse pheromones of Ice Cream Intent?

There have to be ways to thwart her Ice Cream Knowledge. Perhaps I will have to trick myself into believing that I’m actually getting up to thaw leftovers, and then I’ll start exuding Leftover Intent pheromones.

[glumshoe]

I DID IT!

I got up to make myself a cup of tea, thought Tea Thoughts, and then at the last moment I filled my tea cup with ice cream instead of tea.

My cat didn’t even notice. She didn’t smell it, or pester me while I was eating, or come running and yodeling her need when I opened the freezer.

I am free.

[casual-derg]

What happens if you think about ice cream while getting something else?

[glumshoe]

I just tested this. I got up thinking Ice Cream Thoughts, and by the time I got to the kitchen, guess who was at my heels meowing?

[glumshoe]

THIS IS SHE:

[columbojumpscare]

You have a semi omnicient god-tier goblin in your house who can read thoughts and can as such predict the future to some degree of accuracy….

…But it only wants ice cream.

That’s amazing.

[uncle-beanbag]

“Try walking without rhythm so the cat will not be able to track your movements.”

Thsis how you also avoid sandworms in the deep desert.

[rosetherandomreblogger]

This is impressive holy shit.

[ellisthegayboi-deactivated20191]

your cat looks like a devon/cornish rex, is she?

[glumshoe]

She’s a Cornish Rex in the same way that Stitch from Lilo and Stitch is a French bulldog.

[1esbrarian]

[arqueete]

check out this spotify playlist of men covering women’s songs without changing pronouns

[1esbrarian]

nice

[thegenesimmonsboots]

the same user made a playlist of women covering men’s songs without changing pronouns!

[aphony-cree]

double nice

[twitterlols]

[asdcats]

You compared me to an animal yet were surprised when I attacked. Did you forget that beasts have claws and teeth?

[sandersstudies]

What kind of Shakespeare copy is this

[sandersstudies]

“Thou calledst me dog before thou hadst a cause.

But since I am a dog, beware my fangs.”

- Merchant of Venice, Act 3 Scene 3

[sandersstudies]

[transpeterafterdark]

[sneakyfeets]

Me, plunking Stinky Bastard Man’s carrier on the counter: hi he’s here for shots and a nail trim and he’ll need to be sedated

Nurse: Are you sure? We can try-

Me: he needs to be sedated

Nurse: Well, it’ll take longer-

Me: he needs to be sedated, he will try to rip your face off

Nurse: Well we’ll try without first and we’ll let you know if we need to sedate

Me, watching her carry him away: you will need to sedate him

Nurse, coming back 10 minutes later clutching her hand: so, we will need to sedate him

Me:

[sneakyfeets]

A man with 3 caution stickers on his med file

[bumbleshark]

I didn’t know what animal this would be, but I sure as hell would have listened the first time if a cat owner told me to sedate their fucking cat

[thosedogsthatlovetherain]

Dog owners are the ones usually in denial about their pets behavior. If a cat owner says sedate, I promise you it’s because the cat is truly going to attempt murder

[cumdumpstiel]

ppl who aren’t afraid to display gender nonconformity in dress, speech or action in public places make me feel so safe and normal and ok i love feminine men and masculine women and androgynous ppl who don’t tone themselves down or make themselves more palatable and understandable to an obsessively gendered + gendering society and i hope to one day truly live that kind of life