Life’s A Garbage Fire

But here we are

[first-son-of-finwe]

I’ve realised that what I miss about fantasy is it being truly escapist. I miss it depicting places where I would actually want to go.

Every dang kid I knew waited for their Hogwarts acceptance letter. Reading the books and seeing it on screen gave you this warm, fuzzy feeling and a feeling of longing, even when they were in danger and fighting monsters and evil wizards, you want to be there.

You want to go to Middle Earth, see hobbits and elves and dwarves and run through this land of incredible beauty, mysticism and magic.

You want to be in the TARDIS, seeing the universe.

The more recent trend of fantasy is this gritty, dark realism and places where you would just never want to go. I don’t want to go to Westeros. I don’t want to be in The Hunger Games, I don’t particularly want to be in The Witcher universe. I’m living in the world of Black Mirror and I hate it.

Fantasy used to say “hey our world kinda sucks but here’s a cooler one”, but now it says “hey our world kinda sucks, but here’s an even worse one.”

That isn’t to say that the above are bad. They’re not. 

But I miss beautiful, escapist fantasy that gives me a break. That takes me somewhere magical, somewhere otherworldly and gives me messages of hope and optimism in the face of darkness. I really, really miss that.

[vardaelcntari]

As a great man once said, “Fantasy is escapist, and that is its glory”. If I want to live in a world full of injustice and suffering, I can just watch the news.

[militant-holy-knight]

Same fam tbh.

[barbarian15]

“I have claimed that Escape is one of the main functions of fairy-stories, and since I do not disapprove of them, it is plain that I do not accept the tone of scorn or pity with which ‘Escape’ is now so often used. Why should a man be scorned if, finding himself in prison, he tries to get out and go home? Or if he cannot do so, he thinks and talks about other topics than jailers and prison-walls? The world outside has not become less real because the prisoner cannot see it”

J.R.R. Tolkien

“[M]y friend Professor Tolkien asked me the very simple question, ‘What class of men would you expect to be most preoccupied with, and most hostile to, the idea of escape?’ and gave the obvious answer: jailers.”

Quoted by C. S. Lewis. "On Science Fiction"

[heroofthreefaces]

Just because it’s “escapism” doesn’t mean you’re not running to something.

[laurashapiro-noreally]

“The direction of escape is toward freedom.”

- Ursula K. Le Guin

[sshannonauthor]

This is part of why I chose to construct Priory’s world the way I did. Bad things do happen there, but I wanted it to be beautiful and escapist, too, and to ultimately end with hope. 

[iamthecutestofborg]

I guess that’s why I’ve always loved TNG so much. It’s pretty alluring, a future where our modern problems are gone and people live to better themselves and explore the universe.

[whatbigotspost]

I’ve never felt more seen by a tweet in my life.

@ 7eandra on Twitter, tweet reads “Those who have stayed inside, wore masks in public, and socially distanced during this entire pandemic are the same people who are used to doing the whole group project by themselves.”

[mysharona1987]

From The Washington Post. Damn

[leafwhirlwind]

Do not let them make you numb.

[awwshitherewegoagainn]

Get me someone who looks at me the way Data and Spot look at each other cause damn those two are such precious nuggets

[whitepeopletwitter]

[tremendoustenderness]

Reading Interview with the Vampire in my formative years has fundamentally defined my taste in fictional characters. The vast majority of all characters I take a genuine interest in can be sorted into two categories which are directly based on Louis and Lestat.

1) Sad Bitch™. Loves moping around. Good at heart but gets pulled into a world of darkness to which they hesitantly adjust. Attachement issues.

2) Sassy dumbass™. Highly morally ambiguous. Snarky comments. Good hair and killer fashion sense. Intense dramatic tendencies. Attachement issues part 2.

(You guess which one is which.)

[lierdumoa]

[whatyouwanted-whatyougot]

I reblog this every time I see it, because it’s one of life’s hardest lessons.

[internetcoward]

“Do or do not, there is no try” is the worst damn advice I was ever been given as a child. Fuck telling kids that their mistakes are the result of deliberate choice; let them know that they can fail for reasons totally beyond their control, and let them know that it’s just important that they earnestly try.

[kryptonians]

I can’t believe Captain Picard learned everything he knows from Beyoncé.

[ladyzootie-deactivated20170525]

Always reblog Picard and Beyoncé

[witchonthestrugglebus]

Friendly reminder- boys are trash

[thingstoshowdan]

I’m in Poland and they keep showing this pizza advert and it’s amazing.

It starts off with rival pizza makers who argue over who has the best pizza and are driving the customers away

Then there’s this crazy old lady who yells at them from a window to quit it (because where else do you yell business advice from?)

So they work together and do some obvious flirting via pizza montage

And the old lady is all like “just kiss already”

Then they create a pizza together, combine restaurants and live happily ever after with the crazy window lady

[lofispirit-blog]

waking up to gay pizza makers, today’s gonna be a good day

[tharook]

a family pizzeria can be two lesbians and a window lady

[captainsblogsupplemental]

[iamthecutestofborg]

Life’s rough, find someone to experience the emptiness with you

[debrides]

I worked with toddlers and pre schoolers for three years. Sometimes I accidentally slip and tell a friend to say bye to an inanimate object (“say bye bus!”) & occasionally they unthinkingly just do it.

[lesbirdan]

I’m glad there’s a teacher version of “accidentally called teacher ‘mom’”

[hermionegranger]

when I worked at Medieval Times occasionally I would slip in real life and call people “my lord”

[mugsandpugs1-deactivated2019010]

One time during family prayer, dad began: “our father who art in heaven, American Airlines, how can I help you?”

[thomrainierskies]

One time my dad went to the White Castle drive-thru and the lady (who was supposed to say ‘Welcome to White Castle, what’s your crave?’) asked, “Welcome to White Castle, what’s your problem?”

She apologized profusely while my dad proceeded to lose his shit laughing.

[mirab3lle]

Yesterday I went to Wendy’s and the girl said “Welcome to McDonalds” and then just sighed

[icouldwritebooks]

Somebody in the elevator asked me what floor I lived on, and I answered “please open your books to page eight”, and we just kind of stared at each other, blinking.

[crimeronan]

i work retail full time and my script gets frequently messy - ill ask the same question twice, or say “$2.60 is your total” while handing back their change, or say “how are you doing today?” instead of “have a good day!” like name it ive bungled it

but anyway, this lady came thru my line buying a book and the review on the front said: “few books are well written, fewer still are important, and this book manages to be both”

as i handed her the bag i was trying to say “thanks, youre all set” and instead my brain mashed up the review and i said “thanks, youre important”

there was this short pause in which i tried to figure out what the fuck id just said. she blinked and then said “oh thank you! youre important too!”

the real kicker was one of my coworkers. when i was relating this story later his response was “at least you said something NICE. last week i accidentally combined ‘youre welcome’ and ‘no problem’ into ‘youre a problem’”

[agrestenoir]

one time, since I used to work as a daycare teacher with preschoolers, i was on my college campus in my gym, and someone was running in the weight room and tripped over a machine and fell, and instead of offering to help, I just stared and said, “This is why we use our walking feet.” we both sat there for a while until the guy nodded and said, “yeah, okay, i should’ve done that.”

[gin-and-eschatonic]

I’ve spent a good chunk of time working in kitchens, so I still will reflexively say shit like “behind” and “coming around” as I maneuver through spaces and around people.

Which, actually, not such a bad thing; I’m a big guy and can come across as imposing pretty easily. The position calls can help defuse that, and also help avoid collisions.

Less good is the time my brain was half functional and I let slip a “coming with a knife” while grocery shopping. THAT took some explaining.

[harold-theyre-thespians]

I work in an office and send tens of emails to customers every day. Once my mum asked me to send her a train ticket I had bought for her. I emailed her “Hello mum, as agreed, please find attached the ticked you requested. Thanks, Alex”

[narwhalsarefalling]

i worked as a camp counselor, and i would have the kids tap somewhere on my legs if they needed something because im a pretty tall dude. today asked my cat if he needed something.

[wren-likethe-bird]

I have woken up in a cold sweat saying “is that for here or to go?”

[la-mancha-screwjob]

Every time a friend thanks me, and I respond with “gladly” or “my pleasure”, I die completely 1000% inside

[fair-itself]

I work at a plasma donation center. When processing donors, we call them by name, they walk up to the counter, and then we ask for their name and donor number. One time, instead of saying “Robert” I hollered “Name and donor number!?” into a full waiting room. Three people started announcing their names and donor numbers before we all realized that I fucked up.

[maplefiasco]

In college, I was a barista at Borders (remember Borders, you guys?!) I once drove through Taco Bell on my way home after a shift. When the cashier said, “okay, that’ll be $5.46!” I cheerfully responded, “Do you have a Borders rewards card?”

[iamthatbeast]

I have dealt with so many difficult customers over the years that I used to angrily call my dog “Sir” when I was mad at him.

[widonotts]

My first job was at my nearest Panera, and after coming home from a ten-hour Sunday morning shift, I was exhausted; but when my mom called me to come downstairs, instead of replying in the grumpy teenagerish tone I usually would, I said in my cheeriest, fakest voice, “Not a problem at all, let me just check with my manager!” before realizing my mistake.

[artwlw]

my coworker went to back up the cash registers one time and she had been at customer service right before. when we finish with a customer we have to sometimes get the attention of the next person and will shout “i can get the next person in line!” but instead of saying that she yelled “HI WHAT CAN I HELP YOU WITH” to everyone in the general area

[youlovelucie]

I have told my dog “no thank you” so many times after working at a preschool

[spacecores]

a couple of times i’ve gotten stuck in a hello how are you good how are you good how are you loop with an equally tired Fred Meyer’s cashier after a long shift but the best time was after a 10 to 10 post-holidays after they told me my total, I asked if they would like a bag today and after a confused few seconds they were like, “no… I have the bags”

[thebritishteapot]

Worked in a gallery where we asked people to take off their backpacks in order not to accidentally damage paintings. So when I went to the shop later and saw a guy in the line in front of me, I told him he had to remove his backpack. He probably thought I was politely trying to rob him.

[valkyrieritter]

The other day they had me working with softserve and fried dough. I was burned out because I kept bouncing back and forth between the fryer and my register and these people had like, 8 things in their order. We get to the ice cream part of the order, and it comes in a bowl or cone. Instead of saying “Would you like the vanilla in a bowl or cone?” I said “Would you like the bowl in a vanilla or cone?” And we all stopped and had to think that through as my cart runner is staring me down like “tf are you doing?”

[dhampir-dyke]

I work at Hardees and we have to yell “thank you” whenever we’re told to do something because of how loud the kitchen is.

One morning, my mom hollered at me to wake up, and half-asleep me yells at full volume,

“THANK YOU”

[eyefriend-deactivated20181218]

i work with dogs, and i have to be a bit strict with them sometimes in order to keep fights from breaking out. recently, while making tea, the kettle started boiling sooner than i wanted, so without thinking i turned around sharply, pointed my finger at it and stared it down, and said, “Bad boy! You need to wait!” needless to say i was very glad i was alone

[mynameisdevon]

I know I’ve reblogged this a billion times but I’ve worked retail for 8 years and these things are never not funny.

[swimtonewyorkstate]

I work with horses and whenever someone’s driving too fast I’ll say stuff like “whoa” and I’ve tried to click to a car because that’s a cue for a horse to go faster.

[flylikeeanegyptian]

I work at a movie theatre and we always make sure to remind them what theatre their movie is in once we’re done with their transaction. Well, one day my coworker who usually sells the tickets was working in the concession stand with me. After helping a customer and handing them their popcorn, she said with confidence “Theatre three is your change!” then stopped, sighed, then said “No, that’s not right” then just waved them on. We still make fun of that moment this day

[ithelpstodream]

[imsuchacapricorn]

Got this talk as an education major too. If you’re going into public service you serve all of the public.

[stop-stalin-and-suck-my-dick]

If you’re going into public service you serve all of the public.

[funnymemes-and-kinkydreams]

[alexander]

This is important hello (x)

[itsahalest0rm]

Reblogging again for the fuckboy who ignored it the first time

[henamyung]

THIS IS SO IMPORTANT

[mischiefthewitchy]

*slow clap for australia* shit mates. Wow.

[okssure]

I will probably reblog this once a day

[i-hate-chick-fil-a]

But did you hear the script from the coward, racist cop, “Put down your weapon.” “I fell threatened.”…They know the script…how to kill us and get away with it.

[lesbianshepard]

my fave greek history story to tell is that of agnodice. like she noticed that women were dying a lot during childbirth so she went to egypt to study medicine in alexandria and was really fucking good but b/c it was illegal for women to be doctors in athens she had to pretend to be a man. and then the other doctors noticed that she was 10x better than them and accused her of seducing and sleeping with the women patients. like they brought her to court for this. and she just looked at them and these charges and stripped in front of everyone like “yeah. im not fucking your wives” and then they got so mad that a woman was better at their jobs then them that they tried to execute her but all her patients came to court and were like “are you fucking serious? she is the reason you have living children and a wife.” so they were shamed into changing the law and that is how women were given the right to practice medicine in athens

[autieblesam-deactivated20190506]

Yeah, this isn’t some Greek myth story about a hero or demigod or something, Agnodice was a real person who actually did this.

[thishazeleyeddemon]

jynnislorg

[soul-likethesea]

Another amazing woman from history.

[firebreathingeli]

Please watch this series of Japanese gum commercials

You won’t regret it I promise

[fandomsandfeminism]

……wow

[williamhmasqets]

omg

[sp00ky-teacup]

OMG?

[shadamy22]

@thisismouseface

[shi1498912]

wtf?!

[iamthecutestofborg]

I will never forget this as long as I live. Like I’m gonna be on my death bed thinking about this.