Man, Red is so shady, she gives her daughter a basket with a password and a hood that can blend with the shadows and we're not supposed to think this woman knows how to hide a body?
Okay someone commented that in the books Red knows how to make smoke bombs so what's up with that woman??? WHY DOES SHE KNOWS THIS
You better be careful @my-middle-name-is-xylophone or you’ll be next
@cometblaster2070
Red, coming for me because I know too much:
No because this woman singlehandedly kept the fact cerise is half-wolf and that she has a second daughter from her village for YEARS if she decided i needed to dissapear no one would ever found me
Red and the Evil Queen didn’t just spend those 4 years together talking shit about Snow White and Milton. Nah, dude, those two have probably gotten away with so much shit
Badwolf Red and Evil Queen were that trio of troublemakers at school who got into the wildest shit ever and somehow came out of it completely intact (kinda like Apple and Raven). Red and Evil Queen were the instigators while Badwolf hesintantly followed along because he can't resist Red puppy dog eyes, it was a bit unfair because every time Badwolf and Evil Queen were caught they couldn't even convince headmaster Grimm that the goody-two-shoes Red was the mastermind of the prank in his officer.
I actually hc that Red had something to do with if not outright helped Evil Queen with hiding the storybook of legends. It's in her room and why would the Evil Queen not just hide into a magical mirror or whataver, and remeber this is the woman that gave her daughter a basket with a locker she would totally have a secret location in her room to hide things, not to mention it would be in her best interest to not sign the storybook of legends so there.
Also, you better believe Red would tell embarrassing stories of Evil Queen from that time to Raven to consolidate her spot as the Cool Aunt
I COMPLETELY agree with your headcanon, dude.
Like, logically speaking, it doesn’t really make sense why Red wouldn’t know about the Evil Queen hiding the book in their fucking room.
And considering the fact that we (quite clearly) know that Red despises destiny because it keeps her family apart and only went along with her story under the threat of *poofing* I don’t find it too farfetched that Red helped the Evil Queen find the perfect hiding spot.
As you’ve previously mentioned, Red did, in fact, give her daughter a basket that has the intelligence of super computer, and has kept her marriage and her daughter (Ramona) hidden from the world for like 15-16 years; it makes sense that she’d be able to hide the storybook of legends for a couple decades.
Another thing as well.
The Evil Queen is, well, evil, as the name suggests, but she doesn’t strike me as the kind of person who’d snitch on an old friend, especially considering how it seems that Red and the EQ were pretty damn close.
Besides, who’d ever suspect Little Red Riding Hood?
Her whole story is about her being a sweet, naïve little girl who trusted a ‘Big Bad Wolf’ and ended up being saved by the Huntsman. The whole story itself is a cautionary tale for children to listen to their parents.
Why would a person like that hide the storybook of legends?
Let us also keep in mind how well the book itself was hidden. I’m betting that at the very least 30-ish years passed until Briar found it, and that by itself was a complete fucking coincidence.
Nobody ever found it, and Briar and Ashlynn certainly never thought about even looking for something like that. The only reason the book was found was because Briar paid enough attention to detail; and because they figured out that the book itself was fake.
Bottom Line: Little Red Riding Hood is an absolutely terrifying woman who you do NOT want to piss off.
If you ever see a (rare) family picture of the four of them, your attention would obviously be drawn to Mr. Badwolf; I mean, he’s the big bad wolf, of course he’s dangerous, right?
And his daughter, Ramona. If her fangs are as sharp as her glare is, then you’d better watch out for her too.
Even Cerise... she seems innocent enough, but there’s something very, very dangerous lurking behind her eyes.
So you turn to Red. It’s little red riding hood herself! You know, the nice girl who just wanted to give cookies to her grandma, then got jumped by a wolf; why would you have any reason not to trust her? She’s completely harmless!
It’s funny how she’s the most dangerous of all due to the fact that she looks harmless.
Bro stop hiding these gems in the tags:
FROM THIS DAY HENCEFORTH, THIS SHALL BE KNOWN AS:
‘THE ONGOING SAGA OF SHADY RED (+SOME FUN FACTS ABOUT THEIR FAMILY BEING SHADY OVERALL)’
[Let’s just shorten it to the shady red bit]
OR IN ACRONYM FORM:
TOSOSR+SFFATFBSO
JUST PRONOUNCE IT LIKE YOU’RE FLINT LOCKWOOD FROM CLOUDY WITH A CHANCE OF MEATBALLS
On another note: CERISE COULD PREVIOUSLY THROW KNIVES AND I DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT THAT???!!
Shit, I know Eah is a kid’s show, but if they can have some sort of dystopian universe; I’m sure they can add in Cerise and Ramona’s knife throwing skills.
DAAAAMN, that would’ve been hella cool, someone needs to go make some fanart of this.
(This is a subtle cry for fanart)
Something just occurred to me.
So I know you said it was only in the pilot, but let’s just pretend for a minute that Red pulled some Black Widow KGB shit and taught both of her daughters how to throw knives.
Now, Cerise has gotta keep up this image of being this ‘nice, sweet, shy, girl next door’ kind of character.
Ramona, on the other hand, can just go fucking ham. It’s a legitimate truth that villains have more freedom than heroes ever do.
BUT
BUT, imagine one day, Ramona and Cerise were bickering over something, I don’t know, maybe Cerise was calling Ramona stupid for casually flipping knives in public like that when a student could get hurt; idk.
And in her annoyance and irritation, Ramona decides to piss Cerise off further and throw her knives without looking.
And....
I think you know where I’m going with this @my-middle-name-is-xylophone.
As someone has previously mentioned; we’ve never really seen the three little pigs again; they kinda just vanished and were replaced by the billy goats gruffs.
Keyword: ‘Vanish’
I’ll let you fill in the rest of the blanks yourselves.
It always goes back to Red knowing how to hide a body doesn't it lol. Now I'm thinking abt Red teaching Ramona and Cerise all the "how to get away with murder" shit and them not realizing how weird that is until they actually go to school for the first time
Cerise, casually going on rant about the best way to get rid of a body
The other students: ...
You're right that Ramona would get away with knowing shadier stuff because she's a villain but I think she didn't realized that as a child until much later so when other children were like "how do you know this???" She would and go "uhh my father taught me wdym" because she couldn't mention her mother.
Badwolf would get pats on the back from the other villain parents from 'wow your daughter is a natural' and 'you truly setting a example for us' he had no idea what they were talking but he just nodded along because he had an instinct it had something to do with Red and he didn't want to know. This man needs a vacation.
Meanwhile Red at the three little pigs funeral:
That would make their family dynamic soooo much more funnier.
I can just imagine a furious Grimm storming into Professor Badwolf’s office about something or the other, like:
Headmaster Grimm: NOW THIS IS THE LAST STRAW, BADWOLF!
Badwolf: ??!??!
Grimm: I COME INTO THE CAFETERIA, AND THE FIRST THING I HEAR IS DOZENS OF STUDENTS CRYING ABOUT HOW YOUR DAUGHTER KILLED THE THREE LITTLE PIGS, AND THEN BURIED THEM UNDER THE SCHOOL.
Badwolf, internally: Ah fuck, fuck, fuck, why did Red ever teach them things like this?
Badwolf on the outside: Is that so, well, uh, I guess I should go tell her good...good job, then.
Grimm:
Grimm: YOU SEE NO ISSUE WITH THIS??!!
That would be THE shit.
Left and right, teachers and students are going to Badwolf, telling him about something Ramona said, or did, or was going to do, and him just sitting down in his chair like, ‘I need a vacation, and a drink.’
The flipside of this conversation with Red would be ridiculous too.
As you’ve mentioned above, Grimm would be complaining about how Cerise just casually mentioned how to hide a body, and Red would simply smile sweetly and ask Grimm why he’d think Cerise did it.
It just sort of struck me right now that Red would also probably be a master liar and/or manipulator, because of her family’s whole deal.
You know that weird reverse psychology thing people do when they try to make you think like something they said was ‘your idea,’ or when they try to make you believe you misheard something, or were wrong about something?
Yeah, that seems like something Red would do.
There’s this one sketch by Studio C, (the Scott Sterling guys) and the little old grandma in it seems like Red with her grandkids in a couple of decades.
Red being a good liar/manipulator makes me think that she was a menace at school but nobody truly knew except Badwolf and EQ. Like she was told Snow White was allergic to something once then proceeded to pretend she had no idea what Snow White was talking about when she had an allergic reaction to the candy Red gave her or Red "misreading" the directions in the dark forest and "accidentally" leading the Prince Charming to a mud pit
Little things like that she can get away by just claiming she forgotten or misunderstood something because it's clumsy and airhead Red There's no way she meant to hurt anyone :)
Also, yes their family dynamic would so funny but just imagine Raven's reactions to all of this since she is on the secret and can't tell anyone
Apple, complaining about Badwolf teaching Ramona how to trow knives of all things since this is not supposed to be part of their destinies and also wondering what happened to the three little pigs after Ramona threw knives at them:
Raven, suddenly remembering Cerise inviting her to a "family outing" with her mom while carrying shovels and a sack covered in what she said was ketchup: *nervous laughter*
My Hc is that after Red meets Raven for the first time she wants to be her personal mentor of mischief and invites her to those super shady family quality time outings. Raven takes one look at that madness and decides to introduce her to Kitty instead
That’s a really good hc.
Because when you actually think about it, Raven, while she is all for rebellion and change, isn’t really a person who actively wants to pull pranks.
But then there’s Kitty. And Kitty loves mischief more than Sparrow Hood loves his guitar. Red takes one look at Kitty and is like, ‘Ah yes, my protégé.’
And the funny thing is, Ol’ Stilton Cheese himself can’t even say anything because pulling ‘harmless’ pranks is all part of Kitty’s story, so if he’s trying to stop her, then that technically means he’s trying to go against destiny.
While he’d bang his head against a wall, I think Kiity would be all like, “I don’t make the rules, Headmaster Grimm, I just exploit them.”
I would also find it really funny if there was an inside joke among all the people who knew Red really well like, ‘Oh, don’t make Little Red mad, otherwise she’ll make you disappear.’ And someone like Snow would be all confused and ask them why’d they say something about sweet, dear Red, while the woman herself would be amusedly smiling in the corner.
Raven.
Poor sweet Raven getting caught up in all the weird and illegal shit their family does would be amazing to see.
Red: Alright children, today we’re going to play extreme hide and seek!
Cerise: Aw, Mom, that’s a baby game.
Ramona: Yeah, we played that when we were little kids.
Raven: What’s extreme hide and seek?
Red, extremely cheerfully: Oh don’t worry, Raven, dear, you’ll find out soon enough! Now remember everyone, if you start bleeding, just put a bandage over it and play on through the pain!
Raven:
Raven: Yeah, I think I’m just going to hang out with Mr. Badwolf in the car.
I imagine them taking Raven out on all sorts of wacky adventures like this because they genuinely like Raven because she’s so sweet and nice, and Raven doesn’t have the heart to reject them because they seem so excited.
Imagine Raven spending the weekend with Cerise and her family, and when she comes back, Apple just asks her how everything went and what they did.
Raven, getting Vietnam War flashbacks about Red carrying around a bloody sack at night: We went camping.
