🤷‍♀️

He/They lots of fandoms you'll never guess Iron Man and Batman, same people different universe, discuss.

[batmansbasement]

We went crazy together, right guys?

[green-in-the-midwest]

Why did Murray and Mr. Clarke have more chemistry than Mike and Will in Volume 2 and why is it Trump's fault

[preggingwhitaker]

Man I have issues when it comes to huckleabbot 💀

[elladorset]

maybe Jonathon and Steve should kiss about it 🤷‍♀️

[batmansbasement]

And then Robin should get with Nancy

[sometimes-petty]

Conversation carried out throughout the shift

[tabithian]

The thing where Tim is somehow able to convince people he's not an actual lunatic?

Like.

Civilians and the general public and anyone not part of the superhero crowd.

Forget picturing the goddamned Batman going to, like. Teacher-Parent night at school.

Picture Bruce sitting there listening to one of Tim's teachers tell him what a sweet, nice young man Tim is!

So polite!

An absolute angel!

Why, they're so lucky to have him in their class, etc., etc., etc.

Meanwhile Bruce is remembering the way Tim sassed him to his face not twenty minutes ago on the way to the school. Or Tim embezzling an entire damned Batmobile by hiding it in the Batarang budget - and then Impulse - Impulse! - crashed it.

(And so on and so on and so on.)

The more Bruce hears about Tim being this well-behaved/model student who's never done a thing wrong in his life, the more Bruce ages before his time/his life flashes before his eyes.

He knows it's an act Tim puts on and the so on?

But wow, do these people not know his kid.

Also. Bruce recounting the whole thing to Dick who also is like - God, Tim really has everyone fooled, doesn't he?

They absolutely love Tim and such, but whatever else Tim is, that kid is not an angel.

[batmansbasement]

Tim Drake, hes like that just because

[twobatsies]

hope this helps!!

[jackandjanetdefender]

Jack, talking to Dana at PT: He's already spending so much time with Tim, so I don't need to worry about him disliking my kid, and he's thoughtful and has abs AND a butler. I'm spiraling, Dana, SPIRALING.

Dana: He sounds a little too perfect. What's the catch?

Jack: ...

*recalls the Robin outfit in Tim's room*

Jack: well

[batmansbasement]

I wasn't aware this was an option, but now that I am, im going to make it EVERYONES problem

[batsandbirdbrains]

But what if all of Gotham knows that Brucie Wayne is a persona Bruce puts on for the public? Like they all saw him be a weird, quiet little boy even before his parents were killed. They saw him be a weirder, quieter little boy after they were killed. They saw him be a loner teenager who hated talking to people, who was always more comfortable keeping to himself.

Then he comes back after traveling the world and he’s suddenly a himbo playboy socialite? Either it’s all an act, or someone finally introduced Bruce Wayne to the good drugs. They’re more inclined to believe it’s the former considering they all start to notice that, while Bruce may always have a drink in his hand when he’s out and about, he never actually drinks it.

But they don’t say anything. They don’t call him out on it. He may be a weirdo, but he does his best to make Gotham a better place for everyone to live. He donates money to all sorts of local charities, he volunteers his time at soup kitchens, he donates brand new clothes and bedding and toiletries to shelters. He’s a good guy. Who cares if he’s a little odd.

Most Gothamites actually feel kinda bad that he must think he needs to play this goofball character in order to fit in, in order to be a contributing member to society.

So they let him play his role.

Then he adopts Dick Grayson, the little circus boy whose parents were just killed in front of him. Who’s eight years old, the same age Bruce was when his parents were also killed in front of him. And everyone knows exactly why he adopted him, because the parallels are too much, and they see so clearly in the way Bruce interacts with him that Bruce just wants to help him, that he understands exactly how Dick must be feeling.

And Dick is a very serious child, at first. He hardly speaks. He clings to Bruce’s hand if Bruce isn’t carrying him. He glares at people. When he does speak, it’s scathing, and he has a sharp tongue.

Then a couple years later, it’s like his personality has completely flipped. He’s goofy and silly and so very similar to Brucie. And they’re all reminded that Dick grew up in a circus, he’s a showman through and through, and they all know it’s an act. They all know Richie isn’t the real him.

But they let him perform, let him put on his show along with Bruce. Because Gotham loves the Waynes, and if they want to have a public persona to have some sort of privacy, then they aren’t going to stop them.

[batmansbasement]

Batman, at a Justice League meeting: Everyone, meet Robin, he's my...er...sidekick. He will be aiding us today.

Justice League, in shock:

Superman: Batman, that is a child. Isn't he a little young to be involved in our type of life?

Batman, giving the most exasperated sigh anyone in the room has ever heard, and catching everyone off gaurd: Yes. Yes, he is. He's supposed to be in bed right now. I put him to bed three hours ago. Then I got to the Watchtower, and he was there.

The Flash: What, you mean a seasoned vigilante who's fought longer than this kids been alive couldn't catch him sneaking out? I call bull.

Batman, giving Flash the most tired glare any person has ever worn ever: You try and stop him

9 year old Dick Grayson, holding a taser (Bruce doesn't know how he acquired it), eating from a bag of lucky charms, and grinning from ear to ear at the flash: Try me Bitch.

Batman: *Sighs*

[batmansbasement]

Just uploaded a new Damian Wayne Centric fic about him struggling with undiagnosed autism and mental-health issues, starring Tim Drake being ThatBitch and Bruce Wayne being a good dad, angst, fluff, and Damian all-around needing a hug.

The Headcanon that Damian, Bruce, and Tim have autism holds a very special place in my heart ever since I heard about it, so I thought why not write about it and share my love for this headcanon.

Anyways, the fic is Move Like Gray Skies (Or Like A Bird, Of Paradise?) By Lovely_SunsCryDaily on ao3 if yall are interested!!

[fallintomidnight]

regulus : "Hey james!...why are you so sweaty?"

James : "Oh this?? It's nothing, earlier my spidey senses started to tingle a bit more than usual. Hurt my chest a bit but now I'm alright 😃"

Regulus :

James :

Regulus : "James did you have an anxiety attack?"

[n1xxi3]

this is going to be the answer i give next time this happens istfg

[batmansbasement]

The funniest thing about Kaz Brekker is that every time he found out a piece of information that the other Crows hated about themselves or maybe just didn't like about themselves all that much, he totally just repurposed it to his advantage AND made them feel better about it somehow?

Wylan: Yeah you can't use me as blackmail my dad would rather I die because I can't read

Kaz: Okay, and? You can still make a grenade. Also, what are your thoughts on identity fraud

Jesper: I'm a Grisha and I've been hiding it my whole life in shame and consolation to my mother's death

Kaz: Right, have you ever seen those old westerns where they whip out their guns really fast in a draw? That's your new job.

Inej: I can climb really well and sneak up on almost anyone, besides you for some reason, but you don't know that yet, because I haven't said a word to you

Kaz, who just laid eyes on her for the first time 3 minutes ago: How good are you with a knife?

Idk I also haven't read the books in a hot second so that's probably not how any of these interactions went but it's true in my heart guys

[dragonheroo]

"In the end, he was not Nina or Matthias or Kaz or Inej or Jesper. He was just Wylan Van Eck. He told them everything."

[batmansbasement]

PERFECTLY ENCOMPASSES HOW ACTUALLY INSANE AND UNHINGED WYLAN'S CHARACTER IS THANKYOU

[prongsinrevolt]

behind every hot girl there is unhealthy, slightly concerning, spiritual connection to harry potter’s dead parents dead friend group

[batmansbasement]

And we can't forget the one teacher that we've all decided is basically their mother, shoutout to professor McGonagall yall

[midnightonprivetdrive]

Regulus completed his mission and destroyed Voldemort and reconnected with Sirius and the rest of the marauders and was the best uncle to harry! I say as they drag me back to the asylum.

[batmansbasement]

James and Lily are both alive and well and Peter never betrayed them I scream as they lock the straight jacket in place

[my-castles-crumbling]

disappear - jegulus - @into-the-jeggyverse - word count: 339

“Alright, who took it?” James demanded, crossing his arms and staring around at his roommates. “This is the fifth time this week it’s disappeared.”

Three pairs of eyes stared back at him.

“You can only lose your virginity once, mate, but I promise none of us took it from you,” Sirius replied sarcastically from where he was curled up with Remus in his bed.

“Not that, you prat,” James rolled his eyes, throwing a jumper in his friend’s direction. “My Quidditch jersey. Just because you all get off on the attention of wearing it around the castle–”

“Oi, I haven’t stolen it since last year!” Sirius interrupted. “I’m a married man now, Prongs, I’m not trying to get any girls to look my way.”

“Sirius, we’re not married,” Remus said tiredly from next to his boyfriend. “And I’ve never taken it for the record, James.”

“Pete?” James asked, turning to the shortest of the boys.

“Nah, mate, I swear! Last time I took it was two months ago, to impress Stevens, remember? Told her I was a reserve Seeker,” Peter chuckled.

“Then where the hell…?” James mumbled, but nobody seemed to have an answer.

It wasn’t until breakfast that they figured it out.

Regulus Black, prominent cheekbones pink, but expression indifferent, walked into the Great Hall to loud murmurs, the red jersey he wore very visible against his housemates’ black and green wardrobe.

“What…the fuck,” Sirius mumbled, eyes wide. “I thought you two were keeping it a secret?”

“Only because he wanted to,” James replied softly, smiling so wide his jaw ached. “Guess he changed his mind.”

James met Regulus’s eye, and for a moment, the murmurs dulled. Regulus raised an eyebrow at him and smirked just slightly, as if asking him what he was going to do about this.

As if he wasn’t going to be completely, obnoxiously, publicly in love with him now. “Sorry, boys,” James said happily, standing up and walking toward the Slytherin table. “I have to go have breakfast with my boyfriend this morning.”