[sayorithot]

hm yes the mysterious handy tool for unusual home adventures with a twist my favorite device

[jawpeople]

enough films about autistic piano and math prodigies that are clearly just inspiration porn. i want a movie about a schizophrenic who can shoot hoops like nobody's business

[auckie]

[worldheritagepostorganization]

World Heritage Post

[paininmyassachusetts]

A hitman who advertises his services the way a commission artist does

[paininmyassachusetts]

“Um hey guys. I’ve been hit pretty hard with financial difficulty lately. I’d really appreciate it if you’d consider commissioning me.”

[the-mighty-birdy-deactivated202]

Stabbings: $45

Gunshots: $100

Poisonings: $200

Thanks you guys please share if you can!  ❤️❤️❤️

[rabbits-of-negative-euphoria]

Commissions I will NOT take:

👎 Kids (Teens are fine tho)

👎 Bystanders

👎 Other Hitmen

If you want to know why, message me, but otherwise no hate pls ✨

[jelloapocalypse]

hey guys, normally i try to keep drama off of my blog but this is really important. I just wanted to let you know that someone named WetWorkKing05 has been taking credit for MY kills over on redbloodle.com and is making money off of my hard work. When I messaged him directly he blocked me and threatened to kill ME >_> I’ve tried talking with the mods about getting his account taken down, but redbloodle has NO policy for this and they are no help at all. i don’t know what to do??

PLS signal boost if you can! And in the meantime, if you need somebody killed, do NOT hire WetWorkKing05! he is a THIEF!

[jelloapocalypse]

repeat after me:

MURDER 👏 THEFT 👏 IS 👏 A 👏 WORSE 👏 CRIME 👏 THAN 👏 REGULAR  👏 MURDER  👏

[uncklerman]

Credits to the murderer

[vashito]

“Why are your prices so high???? I could kill him myself for free! whatever, ur not even that good at murder anyway”

[alertmode]

Emergency Murder Slots available!

First Person - $450, additional bodies add $375 each

(Basically a steal still my normal rate is $650. Cmon guys it’s $200 off!)

Serious inquiries only. EXPOSURE IS NOT A CURRENCY!

[klubbhead]

Guys please support all these hardworking Individuals!

Good hitmen are hard to find so it’s up to us to raise awareness!!!!

[slumberinggirl-deactivated20210]

Omg I love this guy’s work! He’s new and not so well known in the hitman community, but he’s so amazing and is appreciate it if you guys have him some love ❤️❤️

[thatquietkid108]

Support your local assassins

[helloareyouheremdfan]

”um why would I pay a hitmen would I could just steal military ai and have it kill anyone I want for free”

[shr00mie-rat]

Ai military robots can not murder like real hit men, they’re messy and lack the spirit that involves murder

[cliodevotus]

I’m never leaving this fucking app.

[the-big-mood]

[what-even-is-thiss]

You know it is kind of fascinating to me watching professionals do what they do even if it’s presented a bit weirdly. You can in fact go to school for this sort of thing.

[prokopetz]

The choice of music and the patterned wall art directly behind his head make it feel like I should be fighting this guy in EarthBound.

[teaboot]

I guess we’re having pasta, then

[teaboot]

okay.

[harbinger-of-silly]

All gays will go to hellsite

[king-of-oreo]

What if in hellsite but not gay

[punky-beaver-offical]

[king-of-oreo]

NO!

[avhira]

[skelotan]

This is what happens when you say yes to everything at the checkout.

[clickrtrained]

in 2026 we must all use girl and babe as gender neutral terms. spread the word

[clickrtrained]

men suck and girls are awesome. hope this helps

[satan-offical]

[satan-offical]

10k notes?? For this??

[pukicho]

My child will not be allowed to use chat gpt. He will be smarter and stronger than the other children and he will kill them easily.

[aggressionbread]

just letting everyone know this post has been cooking for 7 years and it'll finally post in 2028

its so old that when i click edit the corners of the boxes are still sharp

[flairina]

[what-even-is-thiss]

Why do sex gods all have to be twinks you cowards

[totally-cis-offical]

Zeus

[what-even-is-thiss]

Not a sex god, just a cloud pervert.

[what-even-is-thiss]

You don’t pray to Zeus when you’re trying to bone down.

[mothmans-cumrag]

Inanna / Ishtar

[what-even-is-thiss]

I dunno. If women can be twinks in this hypothetical we’re talking about she’s kinda skinny in most portrayals

[cyberpreppy]

Priappus?

[what-even-is-thiss]

I don’t think that tumblr would let me post pictures of him.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Even in depictions where he’s fully clothed, the phallus. Well, it cannot be contained.

[tidalbells3146]

Hold on I need to look something up

[tidalbells3146]

[what-even-is-thiss]

Yup.

[lumpyflakycum]

Bes

[bisexual-engineer-girl]

I somehow never connected the word priapism with Priappus....

[canalpolitjd]

Did you know that he was often depicted threatning sexual asualt to theves.

[boybeetles]

What is going on in r/kitchencels

[kiburebuc]

some highlights from the comments

[energyprison]

Notice there hasnt been a wednesday this year

[muppetshow2026]

you may think misogyny is good because it is made up of miso, which is delicious, and gyny, which is woman. and girl miso sounds great. but 👆 it is not girl miso

[getbentdaily-deactivated2025122]

"Miso" is Greek for "hatred". "Gyny" is Greek for "woman" Misogyny literally means "hatred of women".

The word "misogyny" is always associated with the unnecessary hatred and abuse of women. No one ever thinks about this word in a positive light.

[muppetshow2026]

will you ever forgive me

[muppetshow2026]

jesus christ did i fucking kill them im sorry

[tarantula-hawk-wasp]

Do NOT let family obligations keep you from thinking about yaoi.