Cats, Plants, Whimsical Whimsys

Cats and chaos

[tropiyas]

“i am a monument to all your sins” is such a fucking raw line for a villain it’s amazing that it came from halo, a modernish video game, and not some classical text or mythos

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

classic texts have nothing on the crazy people come up with in modern times tbh

[cerastes]

“I survived because the fire inside me burned brighter than the fire around me.”

– Joshua Graham, Who Is A Fallout New Vegas NPC, Something Most People Throwing This Quote Around Don’t Realize

[sparkylurkdragon]

“If the world chooses to become my enemy, I will fight like I always have.”

– Shadow the Hedgehog in what is widely considered one of if not the single worst game in the Sonic the Hedgehog franchise

[tarradash]

[spookyscaryskeletitties]

this is the source for this text and it haunts me on a regular basis

[onion-souls]

[oblivionsongstress]

“Pick a god and pray.”

-Fredrick from Fire Emblem Awakening

[jedijenkins]

Huh, it’s almost like art isn’t just fine art…

[mysteryseeker]

this is my addition to this ever growing list of raw quotes originating from unexpected sources

[knucklesandgyros]

[silver-tongues-blog]

[lostsometime]

#discovering that the profound is lurking behind the absurd#just waiting for the chance to peek through like sunlight through the clouds#is one of the best things in life once you start to notice it

this is a beautiful way to put it and i’m gonna cry abt it

[broadwaytheanimatedseries]

this post has gotten so much better since the last time I saw it

[rolanslide]

I would like to add

[rolanslide]

“You want to be a hero, Tommy? Then die like one.”

- Technoblade from Dream SMP

We deserve a soft epilogue, my love

- A Stucky fanfiction

[gattinidiguerra]

Truly the best shit on the internet here.

[stormfalcon2018]

Ahem @bettinalevyisdetermined could you please do a video with this?

also “you’re not brave, you’ve merely forgotten the fear of death. Allow me to reacquaint you.” Is the rawest line and it’s from dominus ghaul from destiny 2’s vanilla story when it first released.

[dat-physics-gal]

How can we forget the quote that sums up this entire reblog chain:

Why do you people feel profound thought has to come from high places? The gutter looks at the stars too

[hitmanmason]

“Spare me this mockery of justice!” (A few minutes later, a with a different character) “Silence! Or you shall be held in contempt of court!” “I have nothing *but* contempt for this court!” The Transformers: The Movie (1986)

[eric-coldfire]

“For every kid that dreams up the electric lightbulb, there’s one who dreams up the atom bomb.” - Mr. Electric, The Adventures of Sharkboy And Lavagirl (2005).

[woonanonhatesstaff]

“I like turtles!” - turtle kid

[mithrel]

“If the sea were of ink and the sky parchment I could not begin to write my love for you.”

Grandma Arbuckle reading a love letter in A Garfield Christmas.

[the-haiku-bot]

Grandma Arbuckle

reading a love letter in

A Garfield Christmas.

Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.

[sgchan]

[heehoothefool]

@tenebrisimpyris

[theworstbastardhere]

[ceridawn]

“Your secret is safe with my indifference.” Said by Taliesin Jaffe during Critical Role as Percy.

[thenerdyindividual]

“The world should have protected you, but instead you have been asked to protect it. What an honor; what an injustice.” - Brain Murphy, NADDPOD

“In the same way that your heart feels and your mind thinks, you, mortal beings, are the instrument by which the universe cares. If you choose to care, then the universe cares.” - Brennan Lee Mulligan, Dimension 20

[depsidase]

[psilopterus]

This is it, the best news story (from BBC news):

[miss-edith-cushing]

Ok, so here is the croissant that started all this mess:

When asked about what kind of animal might it be, the woman said: "It's this, oh, what is it called... A lagun!"

The devil works fast, but The Krakow Animal Welfare Society works faster:

They already made a merchandise with an illustration of the lagun - they posted information about it on Facebook on Tuesday evening and by the Wednesday morning everything was already sold out.

My university professors are so delighted about this story that they are writing tons and tons of limericks, moskaliks and lepiejs (those two last genres are very popular, ridiculous and humorous types of short poems, in last decades popularized by Wisława Szymborska) and posting them on official Facebook pages of our university departments, and I am dying of laughter.

[miss-edith-cushing]

Important update on the story: owners of cafés and bakeries in Kraków realized that this wonderful idiocy that took over the country could bring them profit and help animals, and started selling croissants labeled as laguns: i.e. Massolit Café & Bakery is sending 10% of income from selling laguns to the Krakow Animal Welfare Society. Thankfully laguns are selling like hotcakes and bakeries don't plan to stop making them, so the story that started and could quickly die as just another seasonal nonsense transformed into a tool for helping small, helpless, vulnerable creatures, far less dangerous than vicious lagun.

[injuries-in-dust]

This is how cyptids get started.

[righteousangerpodfic]

It’s also *exactly* the kind of story behind the invention of new pastries. If there’s some little change on the ingredient level that can make a “lagun” distinct from an ordinary croissant, then a new pastry will have been born, complete with fanciful cookbook-ready lore.

[gojirahkiin]

Queued up for April 15, 2024 the 3rd anniversary of the Krakowski Lagun.

[kwacpe]

4th anniversary of the Lagun

[totally-india]

HAPPY KRAKOWSKI LAGUN DAY EVERYONE

[bitchesgetriches]

Hi Bitches! I have a fun food story I think you'll like.

So I recently discovered there's a produce rescue in my state that purchases unsold wholesale produce at the border to prevent it from being tossed in the landfill. They then sell it off at hella cheap prices. You don't get to pick what's in your box, but, uh. It's 70 pounds of produce for $15, you get what you get and if you're like me you will figure out what to do with it rather than let it go to waste.

Anyway, my last box included an absolutely insane number of Persian cucumbers. So I decided I'd try something I've wanted to try for years, because if I wrecked one or two in the process it wasn't as big a disaster as if I'd tried it with expensive store bought ones, and...

I can make my own glatt kosher dill pickles now, and holy crap, Vlasic can eat its heart out. Mine are crunchier, more flavorful, better-cut and kept perfectly good food from being thrown away, doing them with my produce box meant they were about 1/8 the price, and also pickling is very easy but people think you're amazing and fancy if you pickle your own stuff.

Also if anyone is in Arizona and wants in on this action, it's called Borderlands P.O.W.W.O.W. (Produce On Wheels WithOut Waste) and you can find them here. Here's what my last box looked like:

I should note that's what's left after I split the box half and half with a friend.

HOLY MOTHERFUCKING SHITBALLS THIS IS AMAZING!!! Thank you so much for sharing this extremely frugal win AND telling the rest of us how to get in on it. With grocery prices the way they are, this is sure to keep a lot of people from going hungry or missing out on necessary nutrition. I encourage everyone outside of Arizona to look for similar programs in your state! (Though I suspect it's mostly only applicable to border states.)

Also, drop that super crunchy pickle recipe, baby.

Here's more advice:

How to Shop for Groceries like a Boss 

You Should Learn To Cook. Here's Why. 

Did we just help you out? Say thanks by joining our Patreon!

[prismatic-bell]

YOU HAVE ASKED FOR PICKLES AND YOU SHALL RECEIVE You will need a 32-oz GLASS jar with a screw-on lid. Please note the glass part is really fucking important. We're about to be pouring hot liquids and also pickle brine by its nature will leach crap out of plastics. I reuse storebought sauerkraut jars because I know they're good for holding pickled foods, but mason jars were also literally designed for this. Also please note that if you do this and then put the lid on and put it in the fridge right away, it'll vacuum-seal itself. Which isn't the least bit necessary, but is extremely cool and makes me feel like a boss, 10/10 recommend. INGREDIENTS:

--1/2 cup white vinegar

--1tbsp white sugar

--1 1/2 tsp kosher salt

--grab a bottle of dried dill and just kinda hang onto that

--4-6 ice cubes, or you can use 1/2 cup of cold water if you're afraid of eyeballing cooldown times (I recommend the ice tho)

--cucumbers 1) slice your cucumbers into coins. I used just under three Persian cucumbers and repeated the experiment later with about 2/3 of one of those giant-ass English cucumbers that's as long as your arm. You will almost definitely have to eat a little bit of unpickled cucumber. Or put it on your eyes and pretend you're at the spa with Oscar Isaac handing you a fruity drink with an umbrella, I'm not the boss of you.

2) layer the coins into your glass jar, with a pinch of dill between each layer. Your layers will probably be flat-ish, not actually flat. This is okay and normal.

2a) (some people will say to just dump a teaspoon of dill in there and call it a day. You can do that. I think layering it helps to provide stronger pickles, but it's your kitchen and your pickles, you get to call this shot.)

3) heat your vinegar, sugar, and salt, stirring gently until everything is dissolved. I've never had mine go as far as boiling, but it does get pretty hot, so watch your hands. Congratulations! You've made brine. (Yes, it's really that simple.)

4) put your jar on top of a potholder, paper towel, or trivet--basically you just want a layer of neutral between your about-to-be-hot jar and your cold counter. Pour the brine slowly into the jar. "Slowly" here just means "in a steady stream you can control without dribbling all over the place."

5) put in your ice cubes ONE!!! AT!!!! A!!!! TIME!!!! I cannot emphasize this strongly enough! This isn't one of those "and if you don't remove the souffle at exactly 37.542 seconds at precisely the speed of 1/28th miles per hour then it will collapse" things, but it is an "if you let the brine cool too quickly you will crack or even shatter your jar" thing. You don't have to move like a snail, but please. One at a time. A second or two is all it needs before the next one goes in, but it does need that second or two.

6) put on the lid and stick it in the fridge.

7) shake it once a day. There is no precise timing on this. It just makes sure any cucumbers that've gotten too cozy-cozy with each other get fully dilled and brined.

8) after three days, you have some damn fine pickles. Also if you want some of the most sinful veggie topping ever for grilled chicken breasts, do this with sliced red onion and carrots, and just swap white vinegar for rice vinegar and dill for about one inch of grated ginger. I refuse to take responsibility for any noises you may make in front of your in-laws and regret as a result, but they'll probably understand anyway once they also taste the onions.

[lexlee20]

Now do watermelons.

No seriously, watermelons are related to cucumbers— not closely enough to cross-pollinate, but close enough that the white part of watermelon rind tastes like cucumbers and it! Can! Be! Food!

I still have three different forms of watermelon rind squirreled away from last summer: sweet pickles (Alton Brown’s recipe), candied in syrup (from a recipe for Greek “spoon sweets” I found online somewhere), and just plain frozen (sliced into green-bean-sized matchsticks first.

They are tougher than your average cucumber and need some cooking to tenderize. But that also means if otherwise unprocessed, the rind can still be crunchy even after being frozen and (briefly) cooked. I mix a handful in with sliced meat to marinate for stir-fry and the rind absorbs the flavors like mad.

If you cook them longer (like soup), the frozen rind does soften but holds its shape and doesn’t fall apart. If you put a *lot* of the rind into an otherwise mild soup, it’ll taste a lot like Chinese wintermelon soup which makes me nostalgic bc my parents used to grow wintermelons in the back yard. I also dice the pickles to mix with ground meat for empanada filling.

In theory it might be possible to shred them fresh into salad/slaw, but I always cook mine before eating bc they’ve already had the melon part eaten out of them first. The green outer skin is very tough so I usually peel that off, unless I want the pickles to be extra-crunchy.

Behold: candied w some pomegranate syrup for extra flavor/color, sweet pickle chunks, and frozen matchsticks.

[prismatic-bell]

👀👀👀👀👀👀👀

[corrundumcat]

Another option is Jam.

Jam is fucking expensive, and yours will taste better. This recipe makes bespoke sets of jam

what you want is

4 parts fruit (stone, berry, pear, apple(not mango))

2 parts sugar

1-2 tablespoons lemon juice.

Stove and Thermomix versions

A large pot or saucepan

A wooden spoon or spatula

A sterilized jar

A ladle (for transferring the jam into jars)

Stovetop

1. Prepare the Fruit:

Wash and remove any stems or pits from the fruit.

Chop the fruit into smaller pieces, especially if it’s large like peaches or apples. For berries, you can leave them whole.

2. Cook the Fruit:

Add your prepared fruit to a large pot. If you're using a fruit that has a lot of water content (like strawberries or peaches), you may not need to add any extra liquid. Otherwise, add about 1/4 cup of water to get things started.

Heat over medium heat until the fruit starts to soften, and release its juices (about 10-15 minutes).

3. Mash the Fruit:

Once the fruit is soft, you can mash it with a potato masher or the back of a spoon to break it down into a smoother texture. Leave it as chunky or smooth as you like your jam.

4. Add the Sugar and Lemon Juice:

Stir in the sugar and lemon juice. The lemon juice not only helps balance the sweetness but also helps the jam set.

Bring the mixture to a boil, stirring occasionally.

5. Simmer and Stir:

Once it reaches a boil, reduce the heat to low and let it simmer.

Stir frequently to prevent the jam from sticking to the bottom of the pot.

Optional: If you're using pectin, add it at this point according to the instructions on the packet.

6. Test the Jam's Consistency:

After about 20-30 minutes, the mixture should start to thicken.

To test if your jam is ready, place a spoonful of the jam on a chilled plate (you can chill a plate in the freezer beforehand). Let it sit for a minute, then run your finger through it. If the jam wrinkles and holds its shape, it’s done. If it’s still runny, keep cooking for a few more minutes and test again.

7. Jar the Jam:

Once the jam reaches the desired consistency, remove it from heat.

Carefully ladle the jam into your sterilized jars, leaving about 1/4 inch of space at the top.

Seal the jars tightly while the jam is still hot.

8. Cool and Store:

Let the jars cool completely at room temperature. As they cool, you should hear a “pop” sound, which indicates that the jars are sealing properly. If you don’t hear a pop, store the jam in the fridge and consume it quickly.

Store the sealed jars in a cool, dark place for up to 6 months. Once opened, keep in the fridge.

How to Sterilize jars

Get Some jars, they need to have a tight seal, Either clean with warm- you want hot - water, or put in your dishwasher. let dry.

Needed for Thermomix

A sterilized jar

A ladle (for transferring the jam into jars)

Thermomix

Instructions:

1. Prepare the Fruit:

Wash and chop the fruit into smaller pieces (especially if it's large, like peaches or apples).

2. Add Ingredients to Thermomix:

Place the chopped fruit, sugar, and lemon juice into the Thermomix bowl.

If using pectin, add it according to the instructions on the packet (usually after the fruit has cooked, but check the pectin’s instructions).

3. Cook the Fruit:

Set the Thermomix to 100°C, speed 2. Cook for 10-15 minutes. Stir occasionally if needed, or use the reverse function to gently mix the fruit without over-blending it.

4. Test the Jam’s Consistency:

To check if it’s ready, place a spoonful of jam on a chilled plate and run your finger through it. If it wrinkles and holds its shape, it’s ready to jar. If it’s still too runny, cook for a few more minutes and test again.

5. Jar the Jam:

Carefully pour the hot jam into sterilized jars, leaving about 1/4 inch at the top. Seal the jars immediately with airtight lids.

6. Cool and Store:

Let the jars cool at room temperature. As they cool, the jars should seal. If they don't seal properly, store the jam in the fridge and consume within a few weeks.

The sealed jars can be stored in a cool, dark place for up to 6 months.

Jam as below (its strawberry jam and was banger)

[prismatic-bell]

I love how this has turned into a home-preserving thread.

With that said, I invite you all to join me in what I'm starting this year: a LIBERTY GARDEN. As food prices go up, growing your own will become cheaper than the alternative.

The Liberty Garden takes its name from the Victory Garden of the 1940s. Americans at the time were asked to grow gardens for home use so as much fresh produce as possible could be used to feed the troops. This time WE are the troops, and an army travels on its stomach. Grow to fight for liberty!

Good, nutrient-dense options that store well are onions, garlic, potatoes, sweet potatoes, and yams. Growing your own herbs is easy and will save a ton on seasoning. (You can also grow your own ginger!) With appropriate preservation you can also plant basically anything else you like--I'm going for corn, carrots, peas, tomatoes, cucumbers, pumpkins, bell peppers, habaneros, and possibly some other stuff.

Two years ago I got about three dozen Roma tomatoes off a single plant. It was the only plant I got that year--I made many planting mistakes. My Fry's app tells me Roma tomatoes are currently going for about 30¢ each. That means once you take out the cost of a seed packet, I saved $8.

Now multiply that by many plants. Grow your own.

[prismatic-bell]

@corrundumcat

So funny thing. I got my dad a 10lb bag of oranges. He's an OTR trucker and loves them, so I figured I'd give him a treat for the road.

He forgot them at home.

I found this out a day and a half ago.

Yesterday I saw your addition to my post.

LOOK UPON MY MARMALADE, YE MIGHTY, AND DESPAIR.

That's about four cups of peeled oranges, about a third of a bag.

I'm debating if I should try candying the rinds on my next batch.

[corrundumcat]

YOOOOOO

You should, how was it?

I also love that you liked it. Once you make jam then fruit is going too be your friend. if you have mangos (green specifically) you can make mango chutney. its amazing.

[prismatic-bell]

It's really good. I'm debating adding habanero to my next batch just to see what happens.

👀👀

[skyberia]

was reminded of that youtube channel that records footage of that bridge that scalps trucks today. one of the fascinating developments that's happened since i last heard about it is that, in one of their many attempts to stop the trucks from being can-opened, they installed a traffic light that detects when a vehicle that's over the allowed height is coming and turns red so the driver can stop and hopefully notice the signage all around that's screaming "YOUR VEHICLE IS OVERHEIGHT TURN AROUND" and avoid an accident. However as a result sometimes drivers see the light turning yellow and IMMEDIATELY start flooring it to avoid having to stop, ensuring that the roof of their truck just gets fucking annihilated instantly. Really beautiful stuff you should check it out

[nieyao]

the comments have me in tears

[abowlofjellyfish]

[twiggies-draws]

@rogue-bard

It DOES have a sign. It turns on when it detects something too tall for the bridge. It even flashes. And the traffic lights will go red to get people to stop when it detects an over height vehicle so they read the signs. (note this lovely example where the lights are red, because the truck thought it was better than the lights)

[library-seraph]

every time I see this post I've forgotten how clearly signposted the canopener bridge is, and every time it hits me like a truck (hitting the canopener bridge and getting the top of its trailer ripped asunder)

[reality-detective]

Remember these 👆 countries once had their own culture 🤔

[nonyayo2]

Always re-post!

[emeraldmercury]

Unfriendly reminder that Indian Muslims used to dress indistinguishably from Hindus and Christians until the 90s when Saudi Mullahs started importing their extremist brand of Islam to India and insisted its Muslims should follow it.

[trinketfairy]

Disappointed with Jellycat pulling stock out of larger retailers? Want an alternative brand to fall in love with? Then check out some of the plushies from Mary Meyer!

They're most known for their Putty line, which has very adorable stuffed animals made with very interesting and soft fabric textures!

But I also really love their Marshmallow Zoo line, which has some of the softest-feeling plushies on the market right now!

Or, if you're more into the mochi-minky feel, they also have their Smootheez line of plushies!

Want a unique animal? Mary Meyer has you covered!

In conclusion: Mary Meyer is awesome and makes adorable plushies. Try them out next time you're on the hunt for a new plushie friend!

[demonboyhalo]

collection of useful things tumblr has taught me:

even if you can't fall asleep, laying down with your eyes closed will still rest your body

you don't have to brush your teeth standing up

you don't have to do any chore standing up, from dishes to showering

you don't have to shower with the lights on

if you can't brush your teeth, flossing and a tongue scraper gets rid of plaque and bad breath

if you can't do that, mouthwash kills a lot of bacteria

eating "unhealthy" food is better than eating no food

you can make the same meal everyday for however long you still want it

some pills come in syrups or chewables if you can't swallow them

kids nutritional shakes can be a quick way to get fuel if you can't eat/don't have time

if walking hurts/exhausts you on a regular basis, canes and rollers are for you, no matter how young you are

we have free will—if doing something "out of the ordinary" makes life easier for you, do it

[i-have-n0-idea-what-im-d0ing]

If it's worth doing, it's worth doing halfway. If you can't eat a whole sandwich, eating just some of it (or anything, really) is better than nothing. If you can't brush your teeth, swishing water around your mouth helps more than doing nothing. If you can't drink plain water, drinking seltzer or tea or anything is better than drinking absolutely nothing.

Incomplete tasks are better than no tasks at all.

[luntfontanne]

every day i think about the cat on twitter who looks more like a scheming eunuch than any creature has ever looked

monkey i love you beloved little freak i would die for you

[luntfontanne]

like……… look at this face

UNREAL

[whatcoloristhatcat]

dilute black (blue) tortoiseshell with low white spotting

[tillius-the-paladin]

Daily fucking reminder that Luigi Mangione is innocent, completely and fully. He has been convicted of no crime. He has had no fair trial. He is a SUSPECT. Luigi Mangione is entirely innocent and everyone needs to stop parroting this insidious propaganda that he “committed” the crime he is only SUSPECTED of. He is not a murderer. He is not a criminal. He is an innocent man.

[egelantier]

kazuaki horitomo’s tattooed cats.

[cannabiscomrade]

So Arizona launched an “education hotline” that allows “concerned parents” to report “””critical race theory””” and other things like ~gender identity~ being taught in the classroom

It would be a shame if the number and email were spread to bad actors looking to prank call the AZ Department of Education

602-771-3500 or empower @ azed .gov 🤡

Horne said two staff members are sorting through the calls, and two investigators are working on credible leads.

[yeah-yeah-beebiss-1]

and for the love of god, don’t just spam it with memes or le funny shrek jokes or whatever, they’ll just hang up

make plausible-sounding reports for things that don’t actually exist, so that they actually have to waste time/resources investigating false leads - the goal is to waste time they would otherwise be using to do their jobs, not to get tumblr clout for being an epic troll

[neko-setsuka]

So apparently the internet article said the superintendent wouldn't be deterred by the prank calls because they would 'taper off eventually'. It'd be a real shame if this post stayed in circulation via queues so they get a consistent list of prank calls to filter through. 😇

[whitepeopletwitter]

[bocceclub]

wow i wonder if that 300 year gap could be explained by any outside factors…….whoa! for some reason it lines up with the timeline of britain’s invasion and subsequent colonization of ireland! wild, huh? i wonder if the two are connected in some way? i guess the world will never know….

[trickstertime]

“why do the Irish hate the English so much? It couldn’t have been *that* bad!!”

This was in place till 1973.

[commie-cosmo]

Seeing non irish people reblogging this makes me happy

[shofarsogood]

The stereotype of “the Irish are drunks” is English propaganda used to justify paternalism and controlling the Irish. It’s bullshit.

[inkdot-deactivated20200219]

This weekend I was told a story which, although I’m kind of ashamed to admit it, because holy shit is it ever obvious, is kind of blowing my mind.

A friend of a friend won a free consultation with Clinton Kelly of What Not To Wear, and she was very excited, because she has a plus-size body, and wanted some tips on how to make the most of her wardrobe in a fashion culture which deliberately puts her body at a disadvantage.

Her first question for him was this: how do celebrities make a plain white t-shirt and a pair of weekend jeans look chic?  She always assumed it was because so many celebrities have, by nature or by design, very slender frames, and because they can afford very expensive clothing.  But when she watched What Not To Wear, she noticed that women of all sizes ended up in cute clothes that really fit their bodies and looked great.  She had tried to apply some guidelines from the show into her own wardrobe, but with only mixed success.  So - what gives?

His answer was that everything you will ever see on a celebrity’s body, including their outfits when they’re out and about and they just get caught by a paparazzo, has been tailored, and the same goes for everything on What Not To Wear.  Jeans, blazers, dresses - everything right down to plain t-shirts and camisoles.  He pointed out that historically, up until the last few generations, the vast majority of people either made their own clothing or had their clothing made by tailors and seamstresses.  You had your clothing made to accommodate the measurements of your individual body, and then you moved the fuck on.  Nothing on the show or in People magazine is off the rack and unaltered.  He said that what they do is ignore the actual size numbers on the tags, find something that fits an individual’s widest place, and then have it completely altered to fit.  That’s how celebrities have jeans that magically fit them all over, and the rest of us chumps can’t ever find a pair that doesn’t gape here or ride up or slouch down or have about four yards of extra fabric here and there.

I knew that having dresses and blazers altered was probably something they were doing, but to me, having alterations done generally means having my jeans hemmed and then simply living with the fact that I will always be adjusting my clothing while I’m wearing it because I have curves from here to ya-ya, some things don’t fit right, and the world is just unfair that way.  I didn’t think that having everything tailored was something that people did. 

It’s so obvious, I can’t believe I didn’t know this.  But no one ever told me.  I was told about bikini season and dieting and targeting your “problem areas” and avoiding horizontal stripes.  No one told me that Jennifer Aniston is out there wearing a bigger size of Ralph Lauren t-shirt and having it altered to fit her.

I sat there after I was told this story, and I really thought about how hard I have worked not to care about the number or the letter on the tag of my clothes, how hard I have tried to just love my body the way it is, and where I’ve succeeded and failed.  I thought about all the times I’ve stood in a fitting room and stared up at the lights and bit my lip so hard it bled, just to keep myself from crying about how nothing fits the way it’s supposed to.  No one told me that it wasn’t supposed to.  I guess I just didn’t know.  I was too busy thinking that I was the one that didn’t fit.

I thought about that, and about all the other girls and women out there whose proportions are “wrong,” who can’t find a good pair of work trousers, who can’t fill a sweater, who feel excluded and freakish and sad and frustrated because they have to go up a size, when really the size doesn’t mean anything and it never, ever did, and this is just another bullshit thing thrown in your path to make you feel shitty about yourself.

I thought about all of that, and then I thought that in elementary school, there should be a class for girls where they sit you down and tell you this stuff before you waste years of your life feeling like someone put you together wrong.

So, I have to take that and sit with it for a while.  But in the meantime, I thought perhaps I should post this, because maybe my friend, her friend, and I are the only clueless people who did not realise this, but maybe we’re not.  Maybe some of you have tried to embrace the arbitrary size you are, but still couldn’t find a cute pair of jeans, and didn’t know why.

[hungrylikethewolfie]

This post is one of those things that I will reblog every time it appears on my dash.  This is so important, and no one ever tells you about it.

[skeletree-blog]

I almost didn’t read this but then I did and I’m really glad that I did.

[theopinionatedartist]

Super important

[deafinatlyme]

Tldr: The reason clothes never “looked right on you” is because models and celebrities always had their clothes tailored to fit them perfectly.

[plucky-passerine]

I love this post but it always frustrated me just a little because I can’t even afford to buy new clothes let alone get the clothes I have tailored. But then I remembered that a lot of things are easier to do than you think they will be, so here’s some resources on how to alter your own clothes!

[cats-eye-galaxy]

Please read this, it’s an opportunity to learn about yourself, possibly a new skill and why it isn’t you, it’s the industry.

[altafpatel]

How to spot signs and symptoms of Breast Cancer 

[claireslash]

Reblog to literally save a life

[maximasmac]

whish they told us this in school, all they did was say “feel for lumps, you will know when you feel it”

[bokettochild]

This is important, even if it doesn’t work with your blog theme REBLOG IT!!!!

Women need to know this, not all of us have ever been told what we need to look out for!

[incubus-absolution]

yeah reblogging especially for my transmasc fellows who (like me) might be real uncomfortable with their chests and not know what to watch out for because we try to avoid this kind of thing (just me? okay)

[gwydionmisha]

Cis Men need to know it too.  They can get breast cancer even though the odds are lower.

Everyone needs to know Breast cancer symptoms

[catboybiologist]

Trans women on HRT have breast cancer risk about equivalent to cis women! Make sure you know this! Keep in mind that this might be difficult to monitor early on HRT, since your breasts will be changing size, shape, and texture rapidly, but be aware of these signs and ask your doctor if you’re unsure!

[datasoong47]

[colubrina]

[nevereverbird]