I reblog so much shit this is your warning

shitpost / main blog • she/hers • writing tumblr (yeah i'm goose)

[djcatdotgif]

[mossworm]

is there a name for this

[straawberries]

hey op. i want you to know my boyfriend has been in hysterics, laughing and occasionally wheezing out "bibby" for the past half an hour because of this post. are you proud of what youve done?

[alittlemonster]

Im the bf btw I made fanart

[thedreamthieves]

please.

[conspiracydawg]

sight I saw in san francisco, twice: gaggle of tiny children leashed together being herded along, everyone in hi-vis

[mikkeneko]

[stitchposts]

what is your LEAST favorite stitch?

I don't like counted work at fucking all. So: the cross stitch.

[rabbitindisguise]

reading this as someone who does cross stitch but is scared of the other kinds of embroidery is like overhearing an incredibly tall and buff person say they have beef with Mr. Tom, the kitten that chills at the bookstore

[stitchposts]

FUCK Mr. Tom and his stupid little fluffy tail ok. And his little charted designs.

[the-dragongirl]

Okay, but this neglects the true villain of embroidery stitches: the French knot

[stitchposts]

Don't you dare malign my girl again

[im-a-dream-wizard]

Ok the french knot is very useful but it is a BITCH to do it consistently

[stitchposts]

[ao3-anonymous]

We talk about how this website’s hate mail game is insane, but this might just be a new level

[talbatross]

"skill issue" made entirely from French knots is a next level roast. no coming back from that one. damn

[floridapirate]

Some witches skating

[gwydionae]

Behold, one of my best friend's Halloween costumes, recorded and uploaded by a complete stranger with over a million views on tiktok! (I'm so proud!!)

[louisegluckpdf]

i wish i could teach fruit flies how to kill themselves

[hometoursandotherstuff]

[undeadentropy]

This is diabolical. Loud enough to notice, but virtually unidentifiable from a truck in motion. You pop the hood to see what's up and find nothing. You start it up and it doesn't make the noise. You go for a drive and it's fucking back. Psychological torture

[nessvn]

love this genre of post

[beemovieerotica]

[karlmarxmaybe]

what I love about this is that it indicates that people are way more open to experimentation in filmmaking than the industry thinks

[doriansbutt]

When we saw the Barbie movie for the first time, the entire opening sequence with the little girls and dolls was completely silent and I was like ‘oh damn this is awesome what an intriguing start to a movie like this!’

Then someone in the audience was like ‘there’s supposed to be sound….’ and then the theater started the movie over and it worked and honestly I was really disappointed. I liked the silent version way better.

[dailymarvelheroes]

get you a man who can do both

[nitramaraho]

one of my patients came in for an emergency visit, because she snapped the wire on her retainer watching the movie when MBJ took his shirt off she clenched her teeth so fucking hard she snapped it. that is the fucking funniest shit ever to me this tiny 17 year old girl thirsting so goddamn hard she busted steel

[crystalitesummerstar]

Y'all, it gets better. She found out.

[buzzfeed]

We interviewed her, obviously.

[buzzfeed]

update:

[rainbowselfies]

[blvckgeezus]

Such a developing story.

[pastdueeverything]

I love this story

[athenadcvell]

This was a wild ride from start to finish

[gambit-of-a-small-rabbit-deacti]

I know I say this a lot, But this is one of the best things on this website

[nitramaraho]

Sophia is currently doing great in college, and I still get about one kid a month in the office who asked if this really happened.

[demigoddessqueens]

I found it!! The original post!!

[lousolversons]

me watching 'gratuitous' sex and violence and ''problematic representation'' in my shows and movies made for adults

[coulsonlives]

[iron-crakka]

[technomancyshenanigans]

reblogging this with a video example, because the description doesn't do it justice.

absolutely fucking hysterical get vaporized idiot

[bittylildragon]

[thelovingend-deactivated2025073]

[toss-a-coin-to-your-stan-account]

fucking love when I'm on a call with someone and they start to do a little errand or go somewhere else and they say "and you're coming with me" like. absolutely I am let's go on an adventure I've been spirited away

[stargore]

ooh ooh or when they accidentally drop the phone or something and go “i dropped you! :(“ like. that little glowing box you’re waving around does indeed house my soul!! it’s me!! you’re holding me!!!! and we’re going on a little trip together!!! delightful!!!!!!!!

i love the suggestion that the device they are holding is my corporeal form. very silly and whimsical

[cr-s01]

[soyala04]

[thestuffedalligator]

They’ve been rebuilding the Tower of Babel, but this time they have a team of linguists on site. Every time God smites the builders and invents a dozen new languages, the linguists have a dozen decently sized translations in about a month and work can start up again.

The linguists have been really into it. They say the new phonemes are fascinating. As for God, I assume that at this point he’s just curious to see how far this goes.

[somethingusefulfromflorida]

To keep us on out toes, God gives the next group of builders an extra place of articulation called the flongus between the pharynx and the glottis, creating an entire new column of the IPA chart with sounds between sounds that are literally physiologically impossible for non-flongled people to replicate.

[somethingusefulfromflorida]

Improved symbols for the flongal plosives ("gacks"), flongal trill ("hacks"), flongal fricatives ("groans"), and and the flongal lateral approximant ("moans")

[inthefallofasparrow]

Update: The builders have now simply switched to communicating entirely through a universal sign language like they should've done to start with. No sounds need be spoken, flongal or otherwise. The Tower steadily rises. Be seeing you soon, God, you little bitch.

[koth-harvest-final]

update: the builders are all speaking different sign languages now