I was 12 when I first started to sacrifice myself for the sake of my family. Mom fell ill and I became her primary caregiver. I sacrificed my childhood to take care of her.
I was 15 when she died, the burden of my family fell on my shoulders for now I was the "lady of the house" i cook, i clean, i take care of everything
I was 16 when my grandma broke her hip, again, I was her primary caregiver. I took on the role of a nurse and I'm still doing so
I was 17 and realized that the men of my family do nothing but sit back and enjoy life, except my father maybe, but this changed occurred only after she died
Mom gave her whole life away to others, first to her parents and then to her husband and children, she cooked, she cleaned, she took care of us while working 9-5, she did all of this single-handedly. We all were thankless, I don't want my life to like that
I mean it already has become somewhat my worst nightmare, its not like i don't want to do chores, but i don't want to do chores alone, as if its my duty exclusively, i don't want to be treated like shit, i don't want to suffer
I don't want to marry because then if i get a husband like my mom had, i will crack. I don't want my life to be wasted, first at my father's house and then at the expense of husband and kids.
I am burnt out at the age of 18 and i can't take care of people anymore, i can't handle responsibilities. the only one i want to be responsible for is myself
i want my childhood back, i want to be what i was at the age of 10
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