Sure! The rock is hollow and covers a small container of oil. There's a hole bored through his hand, leg, ass, and the rock with a wick that dangles into the oil container and feeds fuel into the flame. The wick is in a little glass tube to help regulate burn.
this is actually my favorite notification on this post because genuinely do you know how hard it is to sculpt a butt that is like. proportional but also if it's too flat you can tell that there's major muscles missing under the skin but also it needs to not be too caked or it gets weird, and it is actually a major anatomical landmark and if you mess it up the whole legs are off.
so yeah. his ass. it's barely even visible but im proud of it.
I’ve started playing dnd again and the campaign I’m in has the pitch that we all must be characters from written works. The plot is we got thrown out of our own stories and must find our way back.
I am Hamlet, a warlock who made a pact with his Dad’s ghost (it’s absolutely his Dad’s ghost, he wasn’t tricked at all, ignore the fiend patron type) to get revenge on his Uncle. But this post isn’t about him.
Because our cleric, the one entrusted with keeping the party full of heals, the only person with healing magic, is House MD.
“Wait Iz!” You cry. “House MD is a television show, not written fiction.” You’d be correct. Which is why our cleric House is not from the television show.
-me, Hamlet Prince of Denmark, warlock. Bonds: revenge. Alignment: revenge. Flaws: too much revenge. Magical item: talking skull named Yorick who is definitely a magical therapist sent by Hamlet’s ghost dad, totally legit.
-Beowulf, barbarian, stuck the longest, who uses the arm of Grendel as a weapon.
-House, cleric, who upon casting “toll the dead” makes a siren noise somehow with his mouth. He is deeply upset and put off by this.
-Inuyusha, fighter, who as previously stated, has to seduce Mr. Darcy
The party having learned they are 1. Fictional and 2. There are holes in their stories that they fell through and the universe is losing stability, decide to find the source of the issue. Worms aka bookworms are eating holes in stories leaving portals we can travel though. And so in our pursuit of fixing things, we travel though a portal and find ourselves in the British countryside, being yelled at by a girl who thinks she’s our sister.
The party arrives at the Bennett’s house and it becomes clear to the party that we’re in some sort of courtly romance and since portals open tend to open when the plot is resolved, the gang decides the solution here is one of us has to be the leading lady and therefore must seduce Mr. Darcy (who is clearly the romantic lead with all the talk about him)
The problem? House fails his dice roll for knowing shit about Pride and Prejudice except that it’s a romance. Which means we have no idea which one of us is supposed to seduce Mr. Darcy.
We’re able to rule out some candidates.It can’t be House who is Caroline as he’s “clearly here to be paired off with someone else.” Nor Katniss who is Mary. Beowulf isn’t it (who has been cast as Mr. Wickham and is confusing everyone by suddenly becoming a much more pleasant person to be around). Which leaves Hamlet (Jane) and Inuyasha (Lizzy)
Hamlet has a 20 charisma score. The party desperately hopes it’s Hamlet.
Then we get to the ball, Mr. Bingley walks up to Hamlet and everyone including Inuyasha goes “oh goddamn it.”
So some shenanigans arise and we end up positioning Inuyasha in front of Mr. Darcy, who then bends and snaps (House taught him), impressing the man. But he walks off to talk business with some guards instead of talking to Lizzy and all the sudden we realize something is up.
Now it’s been a long time since I read Pride and Prejudice but it did strike me as odd our DM kept mentioning that people owned guns. It wasn’t too odd, hunting is a thing, but I couldn’t remember this much mention of a military and chalked it up to being a minor detail I forgot. At least I did, until Mr. Darcy opened a jar of flies, followed them to a man who was standing slightly askew and promptly decapitated him.
We were not in Pride and Prejudice it turns out. We were in:
This video has been almost completely scrubbed off the internet because the loser who got decked keeps suing everyone. Luckily for you guys EYE have a copy of the video! :)
In honor of the Artemis 2 launch!!! Suck it crazies in the chat yelling about how NASA is using AI!!!
"you're a coward and a liar" it wasn't that long ago a man could be shot or stabbed with a sword for saying that to another man and nobody would think the man defending his honor had done anything wrong.
Also, Mr. Aldrin had an active military career before his astronaut days and i'd say he hasn't forgotten how to throw a damn good punch -- just look at his wide stance
10/10 well-deserved punch
additional info
at the time, Aldrin was 72 years old, 6 foot 2 inches, and 250 pounds. Sibel (the man he punched) was 37 years old
Sibel has made multiple "documentaries" about the moon landing being fake and has repeatedly harassed the astronauts involved, in this instance getting Aldrin to agree to the above meeting by pretending to be doing an interview on space for a Japanese children's television show
Buzz Aldrin's step-daughter was present, and in addition to being poked repeatedly and aggressively with a bible (Sibrel wanted him to swear on a bible that he went to the moon) Aldrin felt the man following them into the hotel refusing to leave them alone might pose a threat to her
charges against Aldrin were either dropped or never filed, based on Aldrin's lack of a prior criminal record, witness accounts of Sibrel's having drawn Aldrin to the hotel under false pretenses, Sibrel's aggressiveness before the punch, and Sibrel having declined to seek medical attention and sustaining no obvious injury visible to witnesses during the incident
I know things are scary because they're going to strike us down with their powerful kicks, but here's what YOU (yes, YOU READING THIS RIGHT NOW) can do
yeah, they did. I wrote up a big long post about the Trevor Project and the 12 hour charity livestream I'm participating in right now, and they deleted it. twice. We've raised over $50,000 for a legitimate charity but because it helps trans kids it gets deleted from the site
When Yi discovers the truth, instead of throwing down immediately, Yi seemingly "comes around to seeing sense" during his argument with Eigong. He sees that the cards are stacked against him and knows that if he raises his sword at the council, he's a dead man. He feigns support, but in the background, he schemes.
He essentially kidnaps Heng and puts her under. He doesn't entertain the slightest possibility that she wouldn't go along with his plans, so he rationalizes that she'll understand once he tells her everything. He fakes her passing to the Tianhuo so he can simultaneously make sure she's safe and make sure Eigong has no leverage over him.
He suggests that his systems need maintenance, despite its autonomy. He suggests hiring living Solarians to give the council something to focus on. She notes the suspicious lack of faith in his own work, but she plays along and creates the dusk guardians to give her an excuse to test her serum in secret.
He tried to buy time for himself. He suggests they need to test an apeman brain before they take off. Eigong agrees and sends a scout ship she personally fitted with bleeding edge tech so it comes home faster than expected.
He enters in backdoor access codes to the autonomous system he designed. She silently notices and increases the firewall of her personal guards and the largest geno-soldier division.
He spoofs his life signs in the soulscape so he can wake up during travel. She slips a piece of programming that wakes all the sols at the slightest sign of trouble, or if a sol seal isn't where it's supposed to be.
As New Kunlun hurtles through space, the start to reduce the amount of moves left to play. Yi manages to wake up multiple times in between the 500 years, making tweaks and adjustments, and Eigong does the same with her dusk guardians and continues her research.
Both of them operate in their relative secrecy, each of them setting countless spring traps for one another in the form of countermeasures and anticipated actions. It's a centuries-long qiankun match where all the pieces go through their pre-determined motions at the word "go."
Yi slowly realizes that he's outclassed. At his wits end with nothing but time and silence, he reflects on his complicity of the eternal cauldron project. He belongs to the council who damned his planet. His vitriol is turned inward when he has nowhere else to direct it. He desperately needs to make things right.
So... why not start with him?
He decides to bring in a complete unknown onto the board, even to Kuafu. He gives his sister his Rhizomatic Stabilizer and the Mystic Nymph. He places his hopes of justice and retribution to her. He tasks Ruyi with taking care of her as his Ace up his sleeve--a savior to both Solarians and Apemen, alike.
Just like how Lear removes himself from the equation during a time when his people need him, Yi does the same.
After 500 years, Shuanshuan stumbles upon Heng after he loses his parents. He wakes her up.
Ruyi breaks the news to her of the passage of time and how her brother "protected" her. She spends the next two years in emotional agony. Two years of screaming and crying when she thinks no one is watching. Two years of simultaneously cursing his name and mourning his loss. She hardens herself, stubbornly refusing to play Yi's game.
Thankfully, it's also two years of recovery and physical reform. She grows close to Shuanshuan. She finds herself helping the village through silent acts of kindness while she tries her best to hide her identity (Shennong clocks her immediately). She listens as the roots talk to her and she learns how to defend herself from the occasional wandering dragon snake by a mysterious man in the limitless realm.
When she watches Shuanshuan get risen to the altar, she can't help herself from saving him and it kicks off the events of the game.
As she goes further and deeper into New Kunlun, she comes to realize that Yi literally haunts everything. All of his designs, his cold calculations, the architecture, the engineering, his flailing efforts to never go quietly, all of New Kunlun is Yi.
At some point, she figures out the truth that was withheld from her: the eternal cauldron project and the harvesting of innocent lives was all Yi's idea. It all clicks into place for her in that moment and she immediately disowns him.
But as time goes on, in the lulls between fighting, she can't help but see the passion and love and care put into every piece of code and every angle of stone and metal. She sees him in the way the geno-soldiers are decorated in historical regalia. She sees him in the decisions to give the apemen ideal living conditions and a painless harvest.
She sees him in Kuafu, who decides to continue his best friend's legacy despite Heng screaming at him for everything he's done. She especially sees him in Shuanshuan, a genius in his own right. He sent her to save them, Shuanshuan tells her. Yi couldn't have been all that bad, right?
Over time, as she brings back gifts for Shuanshuan, she sees him most's especially in the four seasons pavilion, a place built specifically for him and Heng to live. When she finally strips away his brother's bitter vengeance and cold decisions, she's reminded of the older brother she looked up to--someone she thought would one day would change the entire world for the better.
It makes it so much harder when she brings herself to listen to his final recordings and learns that Yi didn't see himself that way at all.
Hou Yi dies utterly alone, filled with regret and wine as he thinks of home. Despite his explicit instructions of his disposal, Ruyi kept him. Heng swears she can hear her brother say "such an unnecessary sentimentality," from the grave.
Funny enough, Yi unintentionally turned Abacus into an AI with enough personhood to make its own decisions out of empathy--a posthumous breakthrough, even during his most turbulent moments. Yi was someone who could breathe life into silicate and lines of code, that's how brilliant he was.
That's how she decides to remember him and she carries it with her as she continues to finish what he started.
I've labeled this AU "Nine Sols Eclipsed" and I really hope I didn't steal someone's AU name. I thought it'd be symbolic because it can work both ways in how Heng protects everyone from the sols yet Yi basically overrides her autonomy in the beginning. I have some more thoughts on how the rest of the events would play out, but I'll save that for another post.
I think I'll have to dedicate an entire book to navigating Heng's complicated feelings towards her brother. I honest to God think I might do it.
But yeah, nine sols hurt me and in an attempt to make myself feel better about it, I metaphorically pulled out the knife it stabbed me with and ended up accidentally stabbing myself elsewhere and I wrote all this and made the feelings so much worse LMAO. To paraphrase one of my favorite writers, "writing this hurt me and I refuse to suffer alone."
If you've read this far, thanks for reading. I'm not done yet. Next time, I'm bringing back Chien.
AU Yi's belong to @/ashdistic @/gensational @/doodledrawsthings and some others I added on first glance (I'm too self conscious to tag them)
i need data for a statistics project for school, so be my sample data, worms. i need thirty people minimum so if there aren't enough voters yet i'd love if you could help. thank you very much. worms.
take this test (https://www.keithcirkel.co.uk/whats-my-jnd/), then come back here:
what's your JND?
.00030-.00099
.0010-.0017
.0017-.0024
.0024-.0031
.0031-.0038
.0038-.0045
.0045-.0052
.0052-.0059
.0059-.0066
.0066-.0073
.0073-.0080
.0080 or greater
Voting ended onMay 13
it doesnt have to be a good score, you dont have to take it multiple times, you dont have to get on a good screen, etcetera. just gimme your score please this is my final project grade :)
theartofmadeline
snowghoul
s-u-f-j-a-n-s-t-e-v-e-n-s
blakekathryn
yousharknotpass
areudirty
ellievsbear
2087
romaincrisis
