oh, hello [moved to mastodon.social/@trwnh]

message me if you want to keep in touch. old description: --- i tag things so well that i'm basically an internet archive. check obvious-humor.com/tags for the catalogue. strictly sfw content / dashboard. in lieu of an about me page, check obvious-humor.com/tagged/me or i guess i could say a few words. here be circa survive and punk rock and post-hardcore, one piece, cats, anarchism, math, and surrealism.

[depsidase]

[udntnome]

[ebonyweb]

[nathanielthecurious]

[vexwerewolf]

[ironboulderfan]

[yamqguchi]

im at a nice restaurant and in the bathroom they have a framed yugioh picture

[one-stop-cringe-shop]

As they should

[jadeharleyinc]

i need people online to start complaining about age verification the way they complain about AI

[segamascott]

[particularj]

From the bill summary itself in the official government website:

“…with respect to criminal offenses involving theft from an interstate or foreign shipment, the bill also makes an offense an underlying offense for prosecution under the federal money laundering statute and authorizes the criminal forfeiture of any associated property.”

So, yeah, it’s a way for the federal police and officers to enrich themselves through forfeiture the way police all across the country do.

Remember that story of the ICE agent who arrested a teen (who is a US citizen no less) and then sold that teen’s phone to a phone vending machine?

They basically just legalized that.

[nraxo]

Hanging on the edge of tomorrow!!

[sentimentalslut]

"very guilty and problematic client" holy copaganda batman

[sentimentalslut]

let’s start parsing who does and doesn’t deserve representation and assign moral weight to agreeing to protect their rights I don’t see how this could possibly go wrong

[anarchistmemedistro]

[onusjott]

This is the endpoint of assigning morality based on ontologies of people. You wind up with the simplest ontology: good or bad.

[madlori]

Getting tired of saying this but

THE POINT OF A DEFENSE ATTORNEY ISN'T TO GET THEIR CLIENT OFF. IT'S TO MAKE THE STATE PROVE THEIR CASE AND DO THEIR DUE DILIGENCE.

IT'S TO PROVIDE A CHECK ON THE POWER OF THE STATE TO JUST THROW PEOPLE IN JAIL.

If someone "gets off" because of a technicality that means the state DID NOT DO THAT.

[maykitz]

[sometipsygnostalgic]

Via @lunnefisk

[dragongirltongue]

adjusted for inflation

[undeadentropy]

We're gonna have to adjust it again for anyone in the US after these tariffs, likely to 100-120 I'm guessing

[tittyinfinity]

[oneheadtoanother]

[demonius-darkblade]

hate how they forced bugs bunny into anti-weed propaganda in the 90s, as if bugs bunny wouldn’t love smoking weed 

[clayboy2000-deactivated20210427]

To be perfectly fair, bugs bunny would also love taking money for starring in anti-weed propaganda and then using said money to buy weed

[violencevoyager-deactivated2022]

bugs bunny is not real 

[zvaigzdelasas]

[xylophonicsynapse]

[battletoads]

[scoes]

[circlusion]

[starlitmyre]

[aggressionbread]

just letting everyone know this post has been cooking for 7 years and it'll finally post in 2028

its so old that when i click edit the corners of the boxes are still sharp

[flairina]

[crabussy]

wow I love to sit crosslegged without moving for several hours straight!

[crabussy]

okay time to straighten my legs man I'm so excited

[crabussy]

I f eel like a suit of armour that was attacked by a welder

[crabussy]

I am nineteen years old

[crabussy]

I am so sorry I just turned 20 I hope you can forgive me

[crabussy]

. yeah okay true I did do that

[minecraft]

I'm at a :.|:; for words.

[shodaisatellite]

[ministarfruit]

I love this text post so I drew it

[voidandradiance]

the most disorienting thing thats ever happened to me was when a linguistics major stopped in the middle of our conversation, looked me in the eye, and said, "you have a very interesting vernacular. were you on tumblr in 2014?" and i had to just stand there and process that one for a good ten seconds

[booksandchainmail]

#i was in a car with a linguist i had never met before the car trip and like half an hour in he looked at me#after i finished describing a geology thing that was happening out the window and asked if i'd ever spent much time on tumblr#the fuckor of it all#and then we spent six more hours driving#it sure does leave linguistic markers! i'm not sure i'm good with it (tags via @thoughtsformtheuniverse)

[issela-santina]

it is one thing to be a linguist and another to be a linguist who knows enough of 2010s Tumblr to spot one of its enjoyers

[lierdumoa]

Oh! @meret118 see above comment! The use of the word "enjoyers" instead of "users" or "bloggers" -> You left a comment a while back asking, "Does this just mean vocabulary words? Other than blorbo and sweet cinnamon roll etc, I can't think of what a Tumblr accent would be." I almost never see anyone use the word "enjoyer" anywhere outside of tumblr, but I see it on tumblr fairly frequently.

Another one is the verb "perceive" i.e. "don't perceive me" "I am perceiving" "I am being percieved." That's something that feels very specific to tumblr parlance.

There's the thing where people on tumblr have an emotional reaction to something and instead of, or in addition to telling you how they feel about it using emotion words, they will narrate a fictional action in the present progressive tense. "I am gnawing at the bars of my enclosure "I am kissing you on the mouth" "you are going into the soup" "you are getting all of the awards"

I once saw someone use that response format in ... I think it was a restaurant review, or a doordash review, or something like that. It was very unexpected seeing it outside of a tumblr post.

There are a lot of other tumblr linguistic quirks I can't currently remember off the top of my head, but I'll instantly recognize them if I see/hear them outside of tumblr. It's always a bit startling to see them out of context.

[pacificnorthwhore]

[i-wear-the-cheese]

when I was in university one of my modules was about internet slang and for our grades project we had to compile and analyse a small database of 100 words used by a specific community of our choice. I chose tumblr and that's how I stumbled across Gretchen McCulloch's research and discovered that yes not only did tumblr have its own vernacular and syntax (as @lierdumoa demonstrates), it was at the time a crucible of slang and memes probably unrivalled by any other part of the internet. and it's stayed that way! even the very title is McCulloch's book because internet is an example of this specific phraseology.

sadly my project is lost due to the website being wiped from the university database after graduation and my then laptop having a major hardware failure. backup your backups people! but the crux of the entire module was that the internet is full of communities using language not only as jargon for specific purpose but also to signal membership in said community. I even wrote a bit about non capitalisation and punctuation useage as a visual cue on tumblr and how including information in the reblog body or the tags indicated different levels of importance or intimacy of thought

I am holding the side of your face and looking deep in your eyes and telling you that love is stored in the syntax, and that we are rotating words together all at once as we all nod at their new and baffling meanings. if the devils sacrament be tumblr then the devils gospel is our collective voice. thanks for coming to my tedtalk

[weirdchristmas]

I am being perceived.