Me: *setting of alarms*
Also Me: *jumps when the alarms go off*

izzy's playlists!

shark vs the universe

Origami Around
Sweet Seals For You, Always
tumblr dot com
ojovivo

blake kathryn
Show & Tell

oozey mess
we're not kids anymore.

No title available
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

tannertan36
trying on a metaphor

roma★

祝日 / Permanent Vacation
Today's Document
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ

if i look back, i am lost

★
seen from Singapore
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Brazil
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from Malaysia
seen from Australia
seen from United States

seen from Türkiye
seen from Ukraine

seen from Hungary
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
seen from Germany

seen from Malaysia

seen from Malaysia
seen from Türkiye

seen from Malaysia

seen from Singapore
@resident-ghost
Me: *setting of alarms*
Also Me: *jumps when the alarms go off*
Me, using speech to text: […] slow
Speech to text: slut
Tv: … what would cause a princess to go on a m*rder spree?
Me, without missing a beat: Boredom.
glad that im not popular enough to have an evil shadow version of my blog that exists just to make contradictions on my posts
Do Not Do This To Me
if this post hits 200k im printing it out and eating it
Achievement Unlocked:
Daily Recommended Dose of Fiber
Make an ill-advised promise within earshot of a gimmick blog.
Quick someone add a fucked-up car so we can get @identifying-cars-in-posts
1976-1977 Oldsmobile Cutlass
That car is not messed up enough. Here.
@identifying-cars-in-posts
1981-1983 Delorean DMC-12
I'll write a hauiku as a comment on this post and hope the bot sees
I’ll write a hauiku
as a comment on this post
and hope the bot sees
Beep boop! I look for accidental haiku posts. Sometimes I mess up.
@identifying-horses-in-posts
Pretty horse!
@i-say-ok
ok.
@cat-spotted
CAT SPOTTED!!☆ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ
Fine kitty appearing during our time of need! This Delightful beast only appears once every 1000 years for the small price of $2.50!
/200K
I choose @weirdly-specific-but-ok ! And it's effective!
the second i saw someone chose me for something i felt deep irrational fear. what eldritch demon is this site sacrificing me to now?
oh are we eating paper is that a thing because i am down baby
If someone asks what Tumblr is, show them this thread.
@turtleneck-crowley @ivankaramazov07 isn't this magic. :D :D ;D
TUMBLR IS HUMAN CULTURE AT ITS FINEST I TELL YOU THE DOCTOR WOULD BE PROUD TO SEE US IDIOTS. IVE SHENANID-ONCE, ILL SHENAN-AGAIN
to all those who got the ducktales reference, i send my love and kisses
I’m turning this into a picrew chain also guys lots of pressure
This is a Picrew made by Nuggts @.nuggts on TikTok You can use this Picrew as a profile picture or in a video etc. with credits! Do
Do it or the animatronics fucking get me also no I did not kill anyone what are you talking about
tags: @biscuits-lovely-corner @expresso4thedeppresso @funkingrn @aroacesigma @lastdivantruther @barracuda677 @pengumi12 @sulkystella @misschuchuw @someonebeatmetotheseusernames @blinksager @sav3yee @chuuyasboner @ur-local-remy-kinnie @urazayt @thelittleprinceconfirmed @gherkin-saute @vinylbiohazard @amioddlyart
tag all you moots this is not an option
also prev yes you @ivankaramazov07 I want you to do it as well
@probablyautism thnx for remembering the weirdest tumblrina on the planet. also can u explain to ur local grandma what she has to do(apologies are afoot)
So tap on the link above my character and simply make your own it could be an OC or you or your sona, anything.
ON IT BESTIE!
im here watching this lmao, funniest shit i seen
NOT THE KILGRAVE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
oh and @probablyautism here u go luv
CMON FOLKS
DO IT
here you are!!
@mystic-mae IM IN LOVE WITH YOUR PICREW!!!!!! beautiful business.
@weirdly-specific-but-ok @styx142 no pressue :)
Wild how I keep returning to this goddamn post. @queermarzipan ball's in your court babe.
It may still need help getting to 200,000.
Here's Aziraphale in disguise:
And here's a backstage shot of the Gentlemen in 1941 suits:
@tothechaos will you print and eat the entire post? If so, here is a long joke. Don't choke:
A man obsessed with trains finally steals one and immediately crashes it, killing several people.
At the trial, the man is found guilty of multiple murders and sentenced to death.
Before he faces his sentence, he’s offered a last meal, and asks for a single banana, which is given to him.
The next day, he’s led to the electric chair. They strap him in, pull the switch, and... nothing happens.
There’s never been a failure before. But because you cannot punish a person twice for the same crime, the court is forced to let him go free.
Within a week’s time, naturally, the man, who is obsessed with trains, goes and steals another one.
He doesn’t care that he can’t drive it or that he failed catastrophically before; he is obsessed with trains and his only desire is to operate one. As before, he crashes it, and kills several people.
Again, he stands trial, and again, he is sentenced to death, showing no remorse, only delight that he got to operate the train.
His last meal request is a single banana. When he goes to the chair, the executioner pulls the switch, but nothing happens. He goes free again.
The train-obsessed maniac, once more on the loose, wastes no time in hijacking a train and crashing it.
His trial is speedy, because this has already happened twice, and he is sentenced to death.
They ask him what he’d like for his last meal. “A single banana,” he says.
“Oh, no you don’t, you son of a bitch. We’re on to you, now. We know all about your little banana trick, and you’re not escaping this time!”
The guards refuse his request, and instead serve him a standard last meal of steak, potatoes, and berry cobbler.
The next morning they strap him into the electric chair, pull the switch, and... nothing happens.
“Did you give him the banana?” demands the head guard.
“No, sir! He asked for the banana but we didn’t give it to him, we swear!” says one of the guards.
Turns out the banana had nothing to do with anything. He was just a really bad conductor.
JEFF, CHANGE YOUR FUCKING URL
@writing-prompt-s
Quick! Gordon Ramsey has tasked you to come up with a new recipe with a rather special ingredient: 'this trainwreck of a Tumblr post printed out on paper'. You don't have much time as the exquisite guest will enter the doors of your fancy establishment the moment this post hits 200k notes. Come up with a recipe. Please provide detailed instructions.
Damn, does edible paper exist? Somebody get Gordon Ramsey on this. He needs to tell us if there's a such thing as edible paper and ink, and then help us find a recipe using it.
You know what? Print this whole thread on a bunch of lettuce and then put that lettuce in a 6 foot sub sandwich.
(If you don't know, I'm an engineer and one of my weirder specialties is coming up with solutions to problems no one else would have come up with. If I made a themed blog, that'dbe the theme. "Weird solutions by Mihai" or something)
Me: *knows edible paper exists*
Also Me: *eats regular paper*
The Good News: I know where the toilets are in [hospital block].
The Bad News: I know where every toilet is in [hospital block].
Car: *drifts across lanes*
Me: and indicators are…?
Me: *gets hiccups, again*
Also Me: waaa—hic!—aah!
Me: *achoo* >.<
Also Me: I’m good!
Me, holding hacksaw: *looks at arm*
Also Me: don’t cut it off.
Me:*uses a road cone to prop open door*
Also Me:*nearly trips over it dozens of times*
Me: *wears a watch*
Also Me: what’s the time?
Forecast: Cold, cold and more cold.
Me: ewww *scrunches face*
Me: *standing outside in the winter Sun*
Also Me: *slowly rotates like a rotisserie chicken*
Me: Surely I’m not this short and useless…
Also Me: I really am this short an useless *sad face*
Me: *has a fancy-smancy smart watch*
Also Me: *sets an analogue face*
Me: *turns mobile data off*
Also Me: *checks five (5) seperate times that it is actually off*
Me: *Gives my friend sh*t for doing [thing]*
6 months later
Me: *is doing what I gave my friend sh*t for*
Also Me: Great, now I’ve got to give myself sh*t for doing it *pout*