hella jazzy

Chloe. 20. maryland. she/her pronouns. grey-ace. slytherin. hopeful future graphic designer. feminist. social justice minded. passible swing dancer. gross hipster idiot. >:D

[horsegirl]

this is the most beautiful captcha ive ever seen i want to go to captcha world

[frogmoss1]

we can go together takes my hands

[perioddramamen]

Give me an occupation, Miss Dashwood, or I shall run mad.

ALAN RICKMAN as Colonel Brandon SENSE & SENSIBILITY (1995) dir. Ang Lee

[romanceyourdemons]

guy currently hurtling toward a migraine at a rate that would impress most astrophysicists: i wonder wgat is happening in my beautiful telephone

[i-am-a-fish]

If you do not use an ad blocker please consider using an ad blocker I'm on my hams and knees begging you

[bucket-system]

hams

[i-am-a-fish]

and knees

[iguanamouth]

I really like winnie the pooh, Can you draw winnie the pooh pleaseeeeee

[thetyrannosaur]

Happy 10 year anniversary to this absolutely foundational post

[skiingcows]

#really cannot emphasize enough how much iguanamouth changed the site’s sense of humor and therefore the timeline of the western world

[fascinationstreetmp3]

it's because you're always interviewing that damn vampire

[jewfrogs]

falling asleep during the day: slipping away on a clouds so easy

falling asleep at night: I heard an ant gasp downstairs

[maryfitzroy]

Have you seen Gracie? Officials in Texas search for missing giraffe

Gracie the giraffe is described as having rounded ears. She went missing from a ranch in Real County.

im crying dude

[fandomsandfeminism]

Yeehaw yall. Gracie is on the run.

[fandomsandfeminism]

To answer some common questions in the tags:

1. How do you lose a Giraffe? She apparently scaled a cliff that served as part of the enclosure (which the other giraffes in the herd had shown no interest in climbing.)

2. Well it should be easier to find her, she's a whole ass giraffe? Yeah, you'd think, but Texas ranches are fuckin huge. The man has apparently hired a helicopter and several drones to aide the search, but no luck yet. She's been seen on some game cameras on the nearby ranches though. But she's sneaky.

3. Why does a random guy in Texas have a herd of giraffes? Because it's Texas and we have basically no exotic animal regulations. No really. If you have enough land out in the hill country, you can just own stuff. It's fuckin nuts.

[asexual-thot]

[tearlessrain]

what companies who sell you anti aging stuff don't want you to know is that if you're chill about aging, your perception of attractiveness changes as you get older. there is no "wall" where you suddenly become ugly and unfuckable because in my experience what actually happens is you get into your thirties and suddenly realize that people in their thirties are hot as fuck and the "flaws" that the beauty industry wants you to panic about are a feature not a bug, and based on the std statistics in nursing homes I don't really expect that trajectory to change.

[aroace-polyshow]

honestly i never thought the phrase “i want that twink obliterated” was like a sexual thing. like when i read the phrase i imagine “a meteor like the one that killed the dinosaurs is summoned from the heavens and hits the twink in question” type situation

[blanketfortarchitect]

I always pictured something like this

[andhumanslovedstories]

There’s an emotion only unlocked when you live in a house with multiple stories. I call it “the stair emotion” and it’s when you realize the object you need is on the other side of yet another trip up and down those goddamn stairs. It’s the closest I get to transcending the desire for material goods. Maybe I don’t need that notebook. Maybe I don’t need anything.

[speedlimit15]

When youre a kid youre like wtf adults are making themselves sick with poisons and when youre an adult youre like i need more poisons ASAP

[speedlimit15]

Of all the tags on this post this is the one that worries me most

[yviisxo]

rest in peace to this diva

[lakevida]

I was born in 2003 is that normal

literally no

[avatarmerida]

Happy pride month to the tiny cowboy and tiny Trojan man from Night at the Museum

[futurakid]

[leg-stealing-bee]

[closetedguyy]

[knitordeath]

This hands down the best comment in the notes, I will not be taking criticism.

[song-of-sea-and-sky]

happy pride month 2021 I ain’t quittin’ you…

[msue0027]

[maxstarfall]

[gengaritez]

[pumpkin--rabbit]

[minyicho]

[papayajuan2019]

it feels like we're all simmering. someone turn us over. someone stir us.

[onion-souls]

Sorry, Millennials, but recent paleontologist findings and hyolaryngeal apparatus reconstructions no longer support the hypothesis that "rawr" means "I love you" in dinosaur.

[onion-souls]

I made you a bibliography but I eated it :(