#asexual jokes

[love-ardour-anarchism]

save a horse ride the city bus with me while I tell you about the history of public transit and the etymology of the name of every bus stop

this is a certified aro-ace post and yes, i'm autistic

[gor3sigil]

Me coming out as asexual: I named my bits "the allegations" the way I don't beat'em.

[blackpinepress]

oh so a few weeks ago my coworker was making garlic bread and he asked if i'd like to try some so ofc i said yes and i had some

the only thing was

he didn't sauté the garlic.

motherfucker gave me RAW GARLIC

[bisexuality-the-concept]

All this talk about pizza and pasta (and I do love pizza and pasta) but you know what Italian food is woefully underhyped?

G A R L I C B R E A D

[loveisloveisacomplicatedgirl]

"i'm not gonna bite you. unless you ask me to." BITCH, STOP IT, I JUST MET YOU! ALSO OUT OF CURIOSITY-

[firewolf111]

Being a sex repulsed acespike is like:

*suddenly feels sexual attraction*

"Eww nooooo! Give me back my asexuality!"

Being an sex repulsed aegosexual/pseudosexual is like:

*has a sexual fantasy*

"Ewww. No, no, no. Go away. Please and thank you."

Being aegosexual/pseudosexual in general is like:

Hmmmm. I don't think I'm really ace. I'm probably just faking.

(But seriously. Give me more labels. The more I find, the less weird I feel. I love collecting them, though now my identity has gotten kinda complicated, lol)

[strigiform-titan]

my science test: select all the organisms that were produced by asexual reproduction the actual correct answers: options a, c, and e

[slickskullshock]

starting 2026 off right: alone, except for my garlic bread