I need some advice. I need help convincing my mom to allow me to get a wheelchair. Our medical aid will cover it so money is not the problem. I'll explain what I have and what her problem with me getting a wheelchair is:
Raynaud's as a secondary condition
The POTS was diagnosed July 14th 2022
Today is September 1st 2022
Autism was diagnosed December 15th 2021
I've obviously had the autism my whole life though.
And POTS since puberty. It's idiopathic POTS meaning they don't know what caused it.
My POTS has gotten worse since I first got it, particularly in the past 2 years.
I need a wheelchair. I have immense fatigue as well as attacks of headaches and extreme nausea that can come on suddenly.
I mean I'm nauseous pretty much all of the time but it can become way worse just randomly.
The wheelchair would be to help with the immense fatigue.
My mom agreed (semi-reluctantly but still) that I could get a wheelchair. This was a week or two ago.
She (able-bodied and prone to ableism) changed her mind after talking to her (able-bodied) therapist.
This morning she came into my room to start yelling at me and say that no I can't get a wheelchair.
My fatigue is apparently caused by the fact that I'm unfit.
She called me getting a wheelchair a regression and she says that I glamourise disability and being disabled because of youtubers like Jessica Kellgren-Fozard.
(I have made her watch a few including Jessica's excellent video about having a mobility aid not meaning you're giving up and I watch Jessica quite a lot I like her.)
(I do not however want to be disabled. Obviously? I wish I had the energy to be out all the time and living not in my house and working and earning my own money and seeing my friends and not be in pain all the fucking time. I do not glamourise disability.)
The point is she's ableist and she loves me and so she's worried that I spend too much time in bed
(^^ caused by lack of energy, which is not going to be cured by exercise. Exercise is not a fucking magical cure)
She's worried because I should be out with my fellow young people.
She thinks I need to try exercising with a biokineticist, and go to her chiropractor, and try the new meds for an unspecified period of time before she will, maybe, agree to me getting a wheelchair.
I'm devastated. I was nervous but so excited about getting a wheelchair because it would mean I could see my friends more.
And go on walks without worrying I was going to be too tired to come back.
It would mean I could unpack the dishwasher without using half my energy.
It would mean I could go to Pride next year and not be in immense pain for a week afterwards.
It might mean I could get a university degree.
Of course my mother thinks I could and should be doing all these things now and that I'm just too unfit and that's the whole problem.
I'm not disabled, I'm unfit.
She's said she'd rather drive me to the park so I can hang out with my friends there and then drive us back than me have a wheelchair.
Please help me if you can. Any ways your wheelchair has helped you do more?
Or function better in our ableist capitalist society?
Has it helped you to have more energy or less nausea somehow?
Have you ever convinced a parent/guardian to get a wheelchair?
I wish I could move out but I can't live alone. I'm in the process of applying for a disability grant but it's so pitiful here in South Africa it's maximum R1900 which is 110 US Dollars/110 Euros/95 British Pounds.
Thank you in advance for your help, I appreciate it <3
P.S. Most of the post is in a big font so it's easier to read for other disabled peeps :)