would die for percy jackson

im drowning in fandoms

[puckwanger]

— dulce et decorum est pro patria mori

[sapphire-or-smth]

[boringmenace]

Ilya thinking he’s about to embark on a sexcation only to be bombarded by cutieful Shane Hollander with plans to spend the rest of their lives together which effectively alters Ilya’s brain chemistry to be The Boyfriend of all time is straight up the funniest thing about heated rivalry

[mutinsfromthemoon]

ilya is awake in the middle of the night and he’s just lying there in the bed, a hand behind his head, the other resting in his stomach and staring at the ceiling when he hears shane asking almost whispering still sleepy and very softly “ilya why you’re so far from me?” and ilya almost burst with the amount of love and cuteness aggression he’s feeling and right away goes snuggles with his husband “oh my baby, i’m sorry” he cooed “i’m here now. let’s go back to sleep” as he pull shane into his arms and burying his face into shane’s hair and smiling while he listen shane letting out tiny pleasure sounds and not long after that with his husband very soft and warm in his arms he finally drifts to sleep

[perlukafarinn]

I think there's a part of Shane that genuinely believes that when he finishes his last game, they will take him out back and shoot him like a sick dog.

[mutinsfromthemoon]

ilya is having sex with shane in all of his sports cars to decide which one he’s gonna take with him to ottawa cus the car where shane hits his strongest orgasm will be the winner. when it finally happens, shane is totally worn out, panting hard with his head against the glove box and ilya is kissing his back while caressing along his stomach and sometimes grabbing his chest and he goes “so this is the winner, yes?” and they both let out a breathless laugh and ilya pulls shane so that his back is against ilya’s chest and he asks “wanna go again?” and shane just shakes his head and ilya goes “no? did i wear out my baby?” and shane nods and ilya kiss behind shane’s ear and gently pats his head and goes “let’s go back inside then im gonna shower you and tuck you into bed and kiss you goodnight” and shane just nods again, completely spent and ilya lifts him up just enough to finally pull out and they both groan at the sensitivity and then ilya gets out of the car and lift shane up in bridal style to carry him back inside, ready to shower him and put him to bed

[academicblorbo]

Everyone: omg Hollander leash your dog, Ilya is barking at opponent hockey players again

Shane Enabler Hollander: ok so Ilyusha this player has had zero assists in the entire season, he got drafted last, and finally - and this is crucial - he once scored a goal in his own team's net

Ilya Heart Eyes Rozanov: thank you my ShaneWiki this is valuable data, off I go

[starcut-sand]

the thing about Tangled is that this is a story geared towards little girls (even if it's "fun for the whole family," it's a disney princess movie, it's geared towards little girls), and it says, "here is a girl who is naive and doesn't know anything about the 'Real World' or how to navigate it safely and correctly. now pay close attention: the good guys are the ones who help her grow and explore new things while still respecting her own perspective and feelings, not making her feel stupid. the bad guys are the ones who tell her that she is too weak/immature/naive to do the things she wants to do, because she is fragile and needs protecting." and I watched this when I was nine years old and it resonated deep in a part of me that I couldn't articulate with words yet.

[to-proudly-go]

Ryan "Rocky is easy to fall in love with" Gosling vs James "The best part of my job was making Ryan Gosling laugh" Ortiz

Oh they were grockying and gostizing on main

[im-out-of-it]

coming back from ghosting shane for SIX FUCKING MONTHS and has the audacity and nerve to say “maybe if you ask nicely” im sorry what? you got this down bad bottom eyes looking at you as if he worships you and your dick and you’re telling him to ask nicely about sucking your dick? IM SORRY WHAT. must be some powerful entity you hold because you certainly got me fucked up over here. big sexy Russian: 1. gay yearning little bottom eyes: -78178287.

[hyacinthsgareth]

headcanon that like his son, david hollander too can also stare at his partner with big doe eyes and get what he wants. it’s rare for ilya to see it but the first time he does he points aggressively and goes “YOU!!! is your fault i never win an argument!!!!” david just blinks while yuna nods solemnly and tells ilya that unfortunately shane learned from the best

[softgnome]

Personally I do think that sometimes non-hockey fans can end up mischaracterizing Shane and Ilya because they don't know enough about hockey/hockey playstyles

The Ilya we see in Heated rivalry would not be throwing the first punch, he's not an enforcer. Ilya is a star center and a Pest. He wouldn't be doing his job correctly if he was punching players every other game, it would end up with not enough ice time to let him be the playmaker he's paid to be.

But being a pest can be playmaking! Find a player to bait, emotionally push them just enough that they try to fight you, and then get the fuck out of there before the ref gives you both penalties. This gets your team the power play. There is probably someone on Ilya's line dedicated to helping him get out of the fights he starts, and finishing them for him!

I also think this is also something that Shane would respect. Ilya is good at it and it's a good strategy for his team. I don't think Shane would see it as some dirty tactic, because Shane probably thinks everyone with a brain can see it for what it is! He probably thinks everyone should be able to see that being an asshole is a tactic for Ilya, that it's something to ignore and not fall for, that it's a strategy and not personal beef.

I think Shane's more disappointed when a Metro falls for it. Shane sees it as Ilya set up a Looney Toons ass obvious trap and one of his teammates ran into it. Why be mad at Bugs Bunny when you can be mad at your defenceman for falling for a fucking Bugs Bunny trap.

[hothockey]

i just know ilya gets a form of cute aggression called shane-submission agression and it means ilya frequently wants to SHAKE&BITE&GNAW&EAT shane. so ilya constantly says shit like i could swallow you whole and stand still so i can bite you and there will be nothing left of you, and shane is just melting beside ilya asking, really? so pick-me smug and insufferable and eatable

[three-semicolons]

You guys have to understand the Batfam dynamic of the 90s. It was amazing.

Bruce: “… >:|”

Tim: *nervous* “heh heh… guys? Guys?”

Dick: “Lmao I could not physically give a shit if I tried”

Exhibit A:

Tim: “Is he.. is he always like this?”

Dick: *joke about Batman’s name*

Exhibit B:

Tim: “Is he.. is he always like this?”

Dick: *joke about vigilante working hours*

Exhibit C:

<Big villain reveal>

Dick: “Aw man :/”

Tim: “…known WHAT?”

Exhibit D:

Tim: *concerned* “…? Nightwing?”

Dick: “>:)”

Exhibit E:

Dick: <is shot> “Dude this lowkey kinda blows”

Dick: <falls from a potentially lethal height> “whoops”

[toasted-rivalry]

A ‘Bears walk in to Ilya’s house and see him napping with Shane AU’ where Ilya somehow manages to still keep Shane’s identity a secret.

Ilya always had been a light sleeper, so no matter how lightly they stepped he was awake moments after the first shocked gasp.

Ilya knows it’s over for him. There’s no mistaking that there’s a man asleep on his chest in a clearly non-platonic cuddle. Usually Ilya would be punching the intruder, threatening violence to try and ensure they kept their mouth shut but he has quickly realised something far more important. With the way they are sleeping, Ilya on his underneath on his back and Shane on his stomach on top with his face pressed into the gap between Ilya’s neck and the couch, they can’t see his face.

He quickly pulls Shane’s hood up over his head to hide hair and rests a hand over it to gently discourage Shane from moving it should he start to wake up.

So Ilya just stares down his team and goes “you can be upset, but are going to be fucking quiet about it because if you wake my guest I’m sending all my blackmail on you to your wives, and then start fucking them to help them get over the divorce.”

So the whole “You’re fucking gay!” “No, I’m a fucking bi who is fucking a gay” conversation happens at a furious whisper, with Shane blissfully sleeping on Ilya’s chest as life implodes around him.

Shane may be a deep sleeper - and the argument in whispers - but even he starts to stir at the noise.

Ilya can’t have him moving his face into visibility now, so he just scruffs the back of his neck harshly and pressed him deeper into his shoulder.

Shane lets out a pleased (and not at all quiet) moan, and - worried that he is going to start talking - Ilya realises he needs to shut him up.

So he glares at the Bears to be quiet, while suddenly putting on the softest voice they have ever heard him use as he goes, “shhh quiet time now mоя любовь. Back to sleep.” And then shoves his fingers into Shane’s mouth.

When the Bears leave soon after, some of them have LEARNT some things about themselves. But crucially, none of them have learnt who their captain is fucking.

[rainbow-femme]

I love the idea of Shane being not just good at hockey but good at all sports, to the point where it fascinates and infuriates the other Centaurs

Because what do you mean they went to the batting cages for some silly fun to watch everyone flail at an unfamiliar sport, only for Shane to need three practice swings before figuring out the force and timing needed to start hitting every single pitch? What do you mean he sets the course record at the mini golf place they have the Pike twins birthday at? What do you mean he learned how to play cricket over a long weekend in the UK? What do you MEAN your Canadian ass that grew up on a calm, tiny lake went to visit Rose in LA and just learned to surf from “some guy” one of the days she was busy??

Shane doesn’t get why they all think it’s so crazy. He’s a professional athlete, he’s good at full body and mind control as well as adaptability and hand-eye coordination, and he’s so used to being the best in the world at hockey that he views being mundanely good at anything else as barely noticeable. He argues with Troy over whether he counts as being good at basketball just because he killed them all at the basketball shooting game at a Dave and Buster’s

They all start making bets to see who can find a sport Hollander isn’t good at. Harris is convinced he’ll win with figure skating because Shane’s muscle memory will want to work against him with a technique that’s so similar but also so different, only for Shane to come out of an afternoon learning from his old friend who was at the Olympics with the ability to do simple jumps and spins and is insisting the whole team learn so they can incorporate it into plays. Harris is not allowed to make suggestions after that

Ilya just sits back and lustily watches his husband destroy their friends at volley ball, wrestling, tennis, broom ball, and ultimate frisbee. Shane participates in an all pro athlete Ninja Warrior event to raise money for charity and Ilya can’t watch the clips of Shane flying through the course like a bat out of hell unless he is able to fuck Shane immediately after it ends

[timdrakemybeloved]

i find it surprising (but maybe i shouldn't) and alarming how many people don't consider obsession to have rape.

i was working as a counselor at a summer camp, and there was a movie night for canada day after the kids went to bed. everyone was petitioning for horror, and obsession won by a LOT. i haven't watched obsession because i can barely watch consensual sex, let alone rape. i was really really resistant, which a lot of the counselors found funny.

first of all, i don't understand what's funny about forcing someone who does not want to watch a horror movie to watch a horror movie. second of all, why did i have to explain to them that from my understanding of the plot - a man gets a wish, uses it to get his crush to like him back, they enter a (nonconsensual on her part) relationship, have (again, nonconsensual) sex - this was a movie with rape in it?? every single time they were like no it doesn't- well... and then continued to find it funny that i was so resistant. rape is so fucking common why would they firstly suggest it when we're not friends so they don't know comfort levels, especially when some of the counselors were underage, and secondly continue to not really consider it rape, and find it funny that i'm resistant once i explained to them?? so many women have experienced sexual assault, even if not penetrative. i have!!

anyways i find this alarming on multiple levels.