Facts of life

Wow I haven't been here in probably at least a decade. Maybe I'll stick around if Reddit continues down the drain.

[felderwin]

WHY WEREN’T YOU AT ELF PRACTICE?!

r-rebecca, it’s not what you think!

[neckwearr]

I WON’T HESITATE, BITCH

[hashtagloveloses]

tumblr users: please ban the Nazis

tumblr: if you post a tiddy you’ll be deleted on sight

[with-drops-of-jupiter]

I C A N N O T breathe

[wdwpres-deactivated20190130]

THAT LAST LIKE .01 SECOND

[communistbakery-deactivated2017]

OH MY G OD

[thorffour-deactivated20190920]

Before vs After Adoption

[source]

[monkeysaysficus]

[sheilikhal]

Truthfully the most precious thing I have ever had the privilege to repost.

[occultjackalope]

This makes my heart so happy. ❤️❤️❤️

[oddfilmstills]

[taylorsblue-deactivated20220812]

I tried to make a comic  in 10 minutes.  It shows. 

[commander-cullen-deactivated201]

BETTER THAN EXPECTED

[filmnoirsbian]

Is there rly any softer scene than when o'malley sees duchess and falls in love with her at first sight in the aristocats, complimenting her at every turn and climbing into a cherry blossom tree to make the flower petals snow gracefully down on her? How dreamy 🥀💕

[filmnoirsbian]

This Is Love 😍😍

[phantoms-lair]

Not to mention when he found she had kids, he was thrown for a second, then proceeded to not only still help her, but dote on them too.

[pitviperofdoom]

“Not all men” you’re right, Abraham DeLacey Giuseppe Casey Thomas O’Malley would never.

[dankmemeuniversity]

[swishersposts]

artists fuck better because we turn sex into art, masterpieces, mattresses become canvases where we can paint our love to someone with bodies.

[zsnes]

its like, impossible to come up with anything funnier than the experience of seeing this post

[targuzzler-deactivated20180224]

pharoahs fuck better because they ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh put the pussy in a scarmophogoghs

[fuck-customers]

Lmao this American girl walked up to a Hungry Jacks (Burger King) register with her drink and really, really loudly (I was at the other side of the place) proclaimed: “I asked for Lemonade, you gave me Sprite” in a really bitchy, entitled voice.

The cashier (and everyone within earshot) just looked at her like “the fuck is wrong with you”

In Australia, Sprite IS lemonade as far as we’re concerned.

Enjoy your 90c refund you cheap ass ho.

[jhenne-bean]

“Sprite IS lemonade as far as we’re concerned”

[freshest-tittymilk]

@fleamont can you verify?

[movednowbye-deactivated20221103]

Yeah this is correct. Lemonade is sprite. Clear fizzy liquid type thing. Solo is closer to what American lemonade is but we don’t actually have what you guys consider lemonade anyway so she was never going to get what she wanted lmao.

[freshest-tittymilk]

Y'ALL AIN’T GOT LEMONADE?!?!??

madness…

[kingjaffejoffer]

“we don’t actually have what you guys consider lemonade“

[thetallblacknerd]

That entire continent exists on a different realm of existence

[blasianxbri]

What the… Lmao

[yosoyleche]

Why is it called lemonade then? 🤔

[fiontan]

@casualswfan What is wrong with you guys?

[seascrapes]

IT IS THE SAME DAMN THING. You Yankees and your fifty brands of the same :P

[fiontan]

LEMONADE AND SPRITE ARE NOTHING ALIKE

[verdytai]

Things heating up in the drink fandom

[fairytalesandimaginings]

I’m pretty sure the same is true in the UK at least was in 2010 except Sprite didn’t seem to be a common brand so I’d ask for Sprite get blank looks eventually figured out to ask for lemonade 

[questions-within-questions]

Sprite is a recognised brand here, but it’s not omnipresent, it is also considered a brand of lemonade.

[larena]

This is fucked up.

[tparadox]

Sprite: lemon-lime soda (pop/carbonated beverage). Lemonade: lemons, water, and sugar. Still.

[zarekthelordofthefries]

LEMONADE IS NOT CARBONATED WHATT HEFUCC CK ARE YOU ALL DOIGN

[taiey]

Living? Sensibly?

Also on what planet does Sprite have lime in it.

[romansnow]

Sprite, the lemon-lime flavored carbonated beverage, is made on Earth.

Earth is the third planet from the Sun, the densest planet in the Solar System, the largest of the Solar System’s four terrestrial planets, and the only astronomical object known to harbor Sprite.

The people of Earth are known as “Earthlings” or “Spriteloids” interchangeably (although not to each other).

[elsandifer]

At least in the UK, if you order lemonade you’ll sometimes get Sprite, but if it’s proper it’s a lemon soda akin to the Italian gassosa - less sweet than Sprite.

[froborr]

Oh shit, I’ve had gassosa, it’s AMAZING.

[elexuscal]

I just want to say that the whole ‘lemonade and Sprite are interchangeable’ is pretty common throughout Asia as well, in my experience

[kingkilling-and-stormlight]

@bre-e-e-e what madness is this?!?!?!?!

[bre-e-e-e-deactivated20170219]

@kingkilling-and-stormlight so… what you are all saying is. Lemonade is … not fizzy… in America?

[lierdumoa]

You guys have orange juice at least, right? Grapefruit juice? In the US, Lemonade is a juice, like orange juice, but made with lemons instead of oranges. You can buy “fresh squeezed lemonade” at many restaurants and fast food venues. Typically it’s diluted a bit with sugar water, so the sour flavor of the raw lemon juice isn’t so overpowering. 

In the south, it’s very common for people buy whole lemons and make their own lemonade at home using a citrus juicer.

[monanotlisa]

In Germany, you’d ask for “Limonade” and yeah, you may get a Sprite or a Fanta; it’ll always be a fizzy nonalcoholic drink and usually come in lemon, lime, orange flavor. Only in healthfood or hipster establishments would it ever be an actual juice drink.

[minim-calibre]

As a fan of homemade rosewater lemonade, I am twitching at the thought of sickly sweet carbonated beverages that taste like they were invented by someone who may have been in the same room as a citrus fruit once but can’t remember what it actually tastes like being called lemonade.

[orcasocks-blog]

Wtf did y'all think beyonce was talking about????

[scuttleboat]

oh wow I hadn’t even considered that. Like millions of people worldwide hearing the album title but not understanding what lemonade means even on the most superficial level.

[maramcgregor]

This is so epically disturbing. Lemonade is such an integral part of spring and summertime. I just … this breaks my brain and my heart. The cultural references too. Just, all the American shows that reference lemonade and people in other countries are thinking Sprite? There’s a reason kids do freshly squeezed lemonade stands. You can’t buy it like that from a store. And there’s nothing quite like screwing it up and getting the sugar ratio wrong. And parents grinning through the too sour or too sweet mess and praising your efforts. Lemonade Is a Thing.

[fastphoridae]

Wait does that mean Aussies make Shandies with sprite?????

[pandor-pandorkful]

Does this mean a significant portion of the global population don’t know what to do when life hands you lemons?

[fozmeadows]

Yes, Australians make Shandies with our carbonated soft drink lemonade, though if you’re using it as a mixer, you’re less likely to be using Sprite and more likely to be using Schweppes, which looks like this:

Like. We absolutely have a concept of flat, juice-based lemonade, but as an earlier commenter said, it’s a niche hipster speciality rather than the default, and even then, it’s still going to be premade rather than fresh. 

[jeremiagoeswoah]

OH GOD THAT’S WHY AMERICAN CHILDREN CAN MAKE IT AND SELL IT SO EASILY. I ALWAYS WONDERED HOW KIDS COULD MAKE A CARBONATED DRINK AT HOME.

[ryblogs]

[allnjstn-deactivated20250522]

Reblogging for Beyonce. This thread is gold.

[gaycoffeelover]

@cresselian

[weavemama]

moral of the story is…..being racist and bitter makes you age like milk

[birdsbeard]

this bitch is FORTY THREE????

[gaypussyretard]

[overpricedvodka]

(Twitter)

President Velveeta plagiarized his inauguration cake.

A. Cake.

This is real life.

[ororomunroedontpullout]

They took the man’s cake design like they are so low down

[taffylemonknees-deactivated2018]

EVERYONE IS MISSING THE BEST GOSH DANG PART OF THIS STORY

THEY DONATED ALL THE PROFITS TO HRC!!

[dragkingandreweldritch]

it’s cool that the bakery also gave a shoutout to the original cake designer

like they absolutely knew how shady this whole thing was and managed to handle it in the best way possible

[miracufic]

Update on #cakegate.

[thecakemonsters]

Omg this is madness

[proudly-pro-choice]

????? This is the guy in my English class that I only contact when I wasn’t in class. It’s too early for this.

If you’ve had some creep send you something worse than this, please let me know.

[proudly-pro-choice]

So he forgot he requested me on Facebook…I messaged his mother.

[justmakeitstop]

You know you fucked up when your mom tells someone to call the police about your ridiculous behavior because she tried but she is DONE, you’re supposed to be a man by now. 

[anarchetypalarchive]

i saw this post earlier about therapists and it reminded me of my old therapist paul, who in my opinion is one of the greatest men alive and who did not put up with my bullshit for even one second

anyway i go in to see paul one week in the summer of 2016, and i’m doing my usual bullshit which consists of me talking shit about myself, and paul is staring at me, and then he cuts me off and says that he’s got a new tool for helping people recognize when they’re using negative language, and gets up and goes over to his desk

and i’m like alright hit me with that sweet sweet self-help article my man, because i’m a linguistic learner and whenever paul’s like here i have a tool for you to use it’s pretty much always an article or a book or something

paul opens a drawer, takes something out, and turns back around. i stare.

i say, paul.

is that a nerf gun.

yeah, says paul.

i say, are you gonna shoot me with a nerf gun in this professional setting.

he happily informs me that that’s really up to me, isn’t it. and sits back down. and gestures, like, go ahead, what were you saying?

and i squint suspiciously and start back up about how i’m having too much anxiety to leave the house to run errands, like it was a miracle to even get here, like i’ve forgone getting groceries for the past week and that’s so stupid, what a stupid issue, i’m an idiot, how could i–

a foam dart hits me in the leg.

i go, hey! because my therapist just shot me in the leg. paul blinks at me placidly and raises an eyebrow. i squint again.

i say, slowly, it’s– not a stupid issue, i’m not stupid, but it’s frustrating me and i don’t want it to be a problem i’m having.

no dart this time. okay. sweet.

so the rest of the hour passes with me intermittently getting nailed with tiny foam darts and then swearing and then fixing my language and, wouldn’t you know it, i start liking myself a little more by the end of the session, which is mildly infuriating because paul can tell and he’s very smug about it 

anyway i leave his office and the lady having the next appointment walks in and i hear what’s all over the floor? and paul very seriously says cognitive behavioral therapy tools.

[satan-graffitied-my-soul]

The “I won’t hesitate, bitch” vine but @ friends who don’t love themselves

[thetrippytrip]

I can’t believe they oblitered straight men like that

[castlevanian]

@tabbran please add lemon man story to this

[tabbran]

PRESENTING LEMON MAN

[themightyglamazon]

That was a wild goddamn ride

[wereralph]

god this was worth the read

[hiest-moved-deactivated20190716]

have y’all seen that nasa pic of the earth with the sun behind it on the night time side it really really fucked me up my own soul became solid and like………….. weeped!

[hiest-moved-deactivated20190716]

who wouldn’t see this and then look deeply into their own emotional playing field to see what improvements could be made purely inspired by the vulnerable earth. this is the face of all literal gods

[greycloudsandlinings]

That’s actually called the Overview Effect- something experienced by some astronauts that makes them see that “from space, national boundaries vanish, the conflicts that divide people become less important, and the need to create a planetary society with the united will to protect this “pale blue dot” becomes both obvious and imperative”.

[idrils]

i see your ‘nowhere in the nursery rhyme does it say humpty dumpty was an egg’ and raise you ‘nowhere in the legendarium does tolkien say that elves have pointed ears’

[annabellioncourt]

Mary Shelley didn’t give the monster bolts.

Arthur Conan Doyle never put Holmes in a deer stalker (also “elementary my dear Watson” is never said in the books, and he doesn’t smoke a curved pipe)

There are boys at Beauxbatons and girls at Durmstrang schools

Edgar Allan Poe wrote the earliest essay on the big bang theory

[mindblownie]

#reality is an illusion

[jewish-kermit]

fuck this site I thought the tv show for the briefest of seconds and the shit machine in my skull thought “quoth the raven ‘Bazongo”