Deadpool and Spiderman: Heartmates.

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@axeltheflurry
Deadpool and Spiderman: Heartmates.
Sebastian “I’m not doing that” Stan
You’re clearly not old enough to have children if you’re thinking of naming them after anime characters or some shit
when sasuke inuyasha grows up he’s gonna kick your ass for talking shit
Videogames: you can choose from twenty different eyelashes!!!! oh but you can’t be fat
Yeah, whine about how you can’t have a fat character that can scale walls, or sprint. Please whine more.
you’re so right kiddo….. games are very realistic……. like the parts where you die and then come back again? classic realism.
but we can’t have fat people in videogames because fat people are the real fantasy creatures and not like… the dragons. and of course, every thin person can scale a wall. sure sure.
Y’know what, here’s something that’s been pissing me off for a while.
Fat? Easy to gain. So so easy. Our bodies want to keep fat around, because we’re designed not to starve.
Dropping fat? NOT so easy. When people talk about “losing fat,” what they’re saying is “I need to override millions of years of genetics to convince my body I’m not dying and it doesn’t need this carefully-stored fuel.” Dieting? Your body thinks it’s starving. Work out like crazy? Your body thinks it’s in a situation where it needs to bring the hammer down on the regular, and that means you need more fuel – speaking just for myself, I want to eat the world after I lift. That shit doesn’t melt away, even if you’ve been training like a motherfucking monster for months and eating right, because the body wants to keep it.
So yeah, the “eat less move more” doctrine can fuck itself right in the face.
There are very, very active fat people, fat people who are experts at every sport and physical activity you can imagine. But because fat rests on top of the muscle, you don’t know when we’re jacked. Oh, sure, sometimes you can get a idea, if a person is WILDLY active, like for a fucking living. Here’s Samoa Joe, the NXT pro wrestling champion who was literally dethroned last night:
Yeah, you can see there’s a lot of power there.
But a lot of times you can’t. Here’s Vince Wilfork, two-time Superbowl tackling champion:
And here’s Holley Mangold, 2012 superheavyweight division Olympian:
These are people who fight (and flip, and do all kinds of crazy shit in Joe’s case), and run, and lift for a living.
And they’re not unusual, as much as you’d like to think so. The world is full of fat powerhouses, of fat runners, of fat Crossfitters, and they’re just as good at doing the thing as their smaller counterparts.
So realism? Fuck off. The only reason we don’t have fat game characters is because society is fatphobic as fuck.
Also? Saints Row lets you be fat, *and hot,* so don’t even come at me with “nobody wants that.”
“fat people can’t climb though”
(Exhibit A: Fezzik carrying 3 people up a cliff)
“yeah but that’s fictional!”
and video games aren’t?
Apparently weight weighs differently if it’s fat instead of, like, eight different machine guns and a rocket launcher?
Video games let you carry all sorts of shit, they can let you carry your own body.
(This got better) -V
I love whenever people are like “ugh, fat people can’t climb a wall”.
Cool story, quick question: can you?
Because plenty of people aren’t into climbing. Being skinny isn’t what allows people to climb. Training is.
The more muscle your body has naturally the more fat your body will store for food.
The more you diet and starve the highrr chance your children will be fat because genetically they that YOU went thru a famine and gave your kin something to protect in case famine comes again.
Your body will eat your muscle way faster then fat. Muscle = unnessasary where as fat =survival; fuel
Studies has show fatness is not unhealthy. Fatness is what your body wants. If you can’t get rid of your fat quickly its becahse your body wants it!
oh no but what about rhodey having that one thought “tony better be alright tony better be alright tony better be fucking alive” as he’s watching all these people around him disintegrate oh NO
Start answering people’s invasive questions with “does it matter?”
Watch them explode lmao
🤔:“Is that your hair?”
😏:”Does it matter?”
Okay but true facts, this can make a profound impact. When I was younger, I had a friend who is trans and my mom once asked what his birth name was, and I asked, “Why does it matter?” She paused and answered something to the effect of, “You’re right, it doesn’t.”
Been doing this for a few years now. Have often been labeled as “rude” because of it, but we don’t owe anyone more information than we want to give them. Ever.
My favorite (aka I fucking hate it) invasive question is “have you ever had sex with a man?”
Always get asked it, never fails. Of all the interesting questions you could ask a lesbian, it’s always the most boring and irrelevant one
Are fedoras really that bad?
YES YES THEY ARE
voidethered:
ask-omnipony:
I don’t really believe this mumbo jumbo
I mean it’s a goddamn hat.
Right..?
The white rose, it symbolizes the unique beauty of all the women who wish not to be with a nice guy such as myse-
I wonder if this works with other kinds of hat…
Nothing ventured, nothing gained…
WHEEEN THE MOON HITS YOUR EYE LIKE A BIG PIZZA PIE THAT’S AMORREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Men of Tumblr are my favorite kind of people…
wait, does that mean?
oh boy…….
Luckily, this nonsense doesn’t work on girls.
Observe…
IT’S GOTTEN BETTER!
This post is immaculate
It can’t be true.
And it can’t possibly work on motorcycle helmets.
I must test it.
Nothing happening so far…
HOLY SHIT IT WORKS
What in the world?
Oh why not? This should be interesting.
Here we go!
Were all mad here in Underland!
What the hell! Never Again!
… Actually …
One more time.
Alright, I gotta try this!
Can’t be that bad!
….
…oh my god…
ask-gmodsfmrocks:
LOL
This just gets better and better
This is one of my favourite things to look at
holy shit this stuff is back
The Gravity Falls one though
i wonder if it works for flower crowns?
here goes nothin-
w HAT THE
DID I JUST-
WHAT THE FUCK
Okay Clearly something is up.
Hmm… I wonder
I’m sure nothing could possibly…
HOLY SHIT
IT GOT BETTER
I HAVE BEEN SEARCHING SO LONG FOR THIS POST OH MY GOD!!!
I wonder what happens when you wear 8 of these at once…
Never not reblog
IT’S ON MY DASH. ACTUALLY ON MY DASH.
Oh my God, there are so many new ones
Friggin, yis
Always reblog.
IT HAS EVOLVED
The legend marches on…
BEWARE THE MAGIC OF HATS
JDNXHSBSBF
I T ‘ S B A C K
a classic meme from when the world was less of a tire fire
ITS ON MY BLOG YESSSS
THIS IS WONDERFUL.
time to bring back outdated memes…
what could possibly go wrong?
eww, it smells like fuckboi
welp, down this rabbit hole we go…
nothing’s happeni-
WTF-
Oh boy, this meme
I wonder if this would work with a wolf hat.
May as well try it.
Please don’t be awful, please don’t be awful, please don’t b-
get wet 4 furry
This is obviously fake
Look, I’ll prove it
Y’all are just acting
Watch and learn
WTFFFFFF
Should…… should I…….
DO IT!
Whelp guess I gotta put on the hat now
Can’t be that bad, I mean what’s the worst a squid hat can do to m-
I̖̝̪̤̠̋͞ ̛̹̱̮̳̭̓̂͑ͫ͐̎ͯ͗͝͡H͇̠͊́̚A̛̓̓҉͙̠V͍̌̏͂ͣͨͭͧ̉́E̸͙̭̣͓̓ͨͥ̿ ̽͗͗ͮ͊ͬͩͥ̚҉̪̗̝̘̟́̕A̴̴̙̝̬̪̞͂ͤͩ̍W͚̣͆ͬỎ̫̝̟͖̝͇ͥ͛ͮ͋K̨̖͓͉̺̫͉̀͗ͪ̊͌̉E͚̲̩̪̘̠͋̈͞N͉͓͕̗̱͒̔ͨͤ͛̓̂ͧ
IT GOT EVEN BETTER XD
THE HAT MEME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This is the first time I’ve seen this and it’s hilarious. I must share!
If this is my first post, so be it
So apparently according to a sound coordinator for A4, there’s gonna be a scene in the movie that will contain no sound 😦
Peter Parker: Spectacular Spider-Man #310
you may spill a tear or two
Ok. Cool. Just fuck my morning up. Break my heart. Nice.
It’s okay I wasn’t using that heart anyway.
September Mood
Someone: If you could have any one super power what w-
Trans and nb people:
You all, fools: *getting tattoos based on the ancient tattoos they find on bog mummies and the other ancient dead that for all you know will bind you to a forgotten god that now by all rights has a claim on your life for better or for worse*
Me, and intellectual: *doesnt fucking do that*
A forgotten god cannot run my life any worse than I am currently running it myself.
Bog mummy take the wheel
god im just thinking about how much going to public school in the MCU would’ve made me hate captain america. every time i got caught giving some bitch the finger or writing on bathroom walls or ditching class or stealing books from the library cause i got a fine or what have you, and then they gave me lunch detention or ISS and i sat in that dumbass eraser-smelling room and im in My Chair (the chair i always sit in and yell at anyone else who tries to take it), fuming, arms crossed, full of teen angst and hating everyone around me, and AGAIN had to watch this stupid fucking video ive already seen so many times that i know it by heart and every word grates on my eardrums and i’d just see this fuckin familiar face
and i would be ready to LOSE MY SHIT
Villain Origin Story
god imagine Steve giving Peter his Captain America is Disappointed in You face/lecture over something dumb and Peter just fucking dissociating and zoning back in to “Peter! Are you even listening to me???” and looking him in the eye and being like “I’m completely immune at this point. You can’t even touch me.” and walking the fuck away
canon.
the real reason why Peter agreed to fight cap at the airport
Brothers in Arms
SO there’s the moment in Inifinity war that was gifed by @lupitanyongio, and I thought, Okoye’s reaction is very mother-like.
But then I thought about it a bit. It’s not a heart-broken mother reaction, it’s a soldier’s heart-broken moment.
I refuse to believe that the people in Wakanda didn’t know about HYDRA, at least as a concept. Within the MCU, HYDRA wasn’t really a secret, and the parts they played in WWII, was so integral to the course of history, there’s no way it was left out of any sort of history book. And it’s not like Wakanda is ignorant of what’s going on - they have War Dogs, spies posted internationally, they had to have had some inkling as to the stories of the Winter Soldier.
So enter Bucky Barnes with a programming inside his head, and he doesn’t feel safe - he’s not himself. He hides away in his little hut with his goats, because this is all he ever wanted in life, peace and quiet.
One day, Okoye’s curiosity gets the better of her, and she visits Bucky.
At first, he doesn’t really want to speak to her, but his mama raised a gentlemen, so he’s not going to tell her to get lost. But the moment she see’s him, she knows.
Okoye isn’t some wide-eyed warrior who’s just joined the Dora Milaje, she’s their General. She’s seen battle. She’s seen death. She’s seen more than enough of it in her 20, 30 years of serving the Dora. To stand before a man who has seen so much in his 100 years, battle, war, death, unspeakable crimes. To have had his will to act, his will to live stripped away.
She sees all this, and her heart breaks, because she knows.
So that look that she makes when Bucky asks “where’s the fight?” That’s of a soldier who knows her comrade has seen too much, and yet, is going back to do the right thing.
And her heart breaks.
THIS IS NOT OK
Considering he was written to represent Jewish values, he should probably be Middle Eastern.
I’m so here for black Jewish Superman
YES (ps I read is Superman Jewish fyi he is)
Black Jewish Superman? Then we know who needs to play him.
Clark Kent:
And then he changes…
…into Superman.
it got better
H ALSHF A
dXINDJBSUONSWH FJBDH XGJNXMLY B
*choked sob* please
yo turns out wE HAD A SECRET WEAPON
AN IMMIGRANT WE KNOW AND LOVE, WHO’S UNAFRAID TO STEP IN.