Cats

Fandom junk. And cats. Lots of cats

[birdplushie]

fiction can be really dangerous there might be a deeply tragic woman in there who starts living in your head forever

[flowersforvax]

haha nooooo fandom don't sand off all the rough edges and pointy bits off of that character those are the parts I scratch my brain with

[bob-belcher]

[officer-eiffel]

canon blah blah blah anyway I would like to appoint myself head writer for season 4 and I have a few radical changes I’m going to make

[bumblebeebats]

Why is it that every time I google something like "Are olives poisonous to cats" the top results are always like "Fun fact: Cats are carnivores! This means that they eat meat. There is no reason to include olives in a cat's diet. You should feed your cat cat food, which is dry or wet food especially designed for cats. You can purchase this at a store." like is there a single person alive on the planet who's googled "Are blueberry muffins safe for cats" because they're planning on switching their cat to a muffin-only diet??? No, I'm asking because the little bastard somehow popped open the packet while I was putting away the groceries and dragged one under the couch before I could react and now I need to know if I should call the after-hours vet. "Cats should not eat spaghetti." NO SHIT, SHERLOCK!!!! "Try to keep human food away from cats." i live in a studio apartment with a completely silent and permanently hungry apex predator who has the intelligence of a toddler and the desperate Machiavellian cunning of a creature who spent his formative months on the streets. He can already open doors and he is this 👌 close to learning how to open the microwave. He is stronger than me and covered in knives. So im gonna do my best but for the moment i just need you to tell me whether this yoghurt is going to kill my son y/n

[spectralhauntings]

I've been using the pet poison hotline's poison list cause it has a search function. It also tells you whether something is mildly, moderately, or severely toxic which can be very handy! It doesn't contain like everything but it might be a good place to start, it also includes plants for fellow houseplant lovers <3

Explore Pet Poison Helpline®s vast knowledge on poisons by reviewing our pet poison list. Explore our top 10 poison and holiday poison lists

[littlemousling]

For plants specifically, there’s also a wildly detailed set of posts and listings about toxicity on the old, wonderful, Plants Are the Strangest People blog

[beemovieerotica]

someone on reddit shared texts of her and her husband's exclusive english dialect and it's beautiful

[beemovieerotica]

a linguist is analyzing it

[homunculus-argument]

I love browsing cover-up tattoo stuff when every once in a while there's someone asking "how do I cover up this unspeakably idiotic thing" and people are like "please do not cover that up, that's fucking amazing." You just have "shrimps is bugs" written on your leg now. That's your legacy.

[wario-hentai-hobbyist]

Have you seen that one weasel tattoo that someone was asking coverup advice for? One of the best tattoos I've seen.

[wario-hentai-hobbyist]

Found it!

[homunculus-argument]

It's so fucking beautiful I'm in tears. Laughing so hard I'm crying but what difference is that really.

[dragon-in-a-fez]

one of the funniest conversations I ever had with my ex was when they were still getting used to Celsius and asked me "what's 20 degrees?" and instead of converting it, I said "it's the highest your dad will ever let you set the thermostat and when you say you're cold he tells you to put on another sweater, we're not made of money" and they went "oh, 68"

the fact that this reference was that fucking precise was something they went on to tell people about for years.

[beesmygod]

theres a guy who got permabanned from the elden ring subreddit for self promotion for posting too many videos of him no-hit parrying various enemies and bosses but after every successful parry he turns and looks at the camera. and bc hes always wearing the albinauric mask its like:

⚔️ BWOOM

👽

⚔️ BWOOM

thank you downtown_drink1594. i thought it was funny

[wrenhavenriver]

[trulyunwaveringphase]

Skeletor has forever destroyed our ability to come up with voices for skeleton characters.

[roach-works]

this is like saying NASA has forever destroyed our ability to wonder what it's like on the moon. like we can still use our powers of imagination if we want to but the question's pretty much fucking settled.

[eebie]

The apple they fed to snow white wasnt poision at all it was just a red delicious

[gummybearattacktheworldofdespair]

[therustyskull]

@ralfmaximus Showers that will kill you

[ralfmaximus]

Holy shit I thought this was a Sims bit or someone playing with CAD software, but the last few seconds knocked me out

[batbetbitbotbut]

@thebibliosphere I'm pretty sure you are the appropriate recipient for other people's terrifying home renovation choices

[annabelle--cane]

love when an absolute nightmare of a character is introduced and all you can think is "jesus christ buddy what the hell is your problem" and the narrative gives you a hot minute to stew before explaining Exactly what is Their Problem. and you just sorta sit back in your metaphorical rocking chair and think "huh. yeah okay fair. that would do this to a person, yes."

[pancakeke]

"there's a guy in the walls" movies exist in a universe that I fucking WISH was real. imagine how easy it would be to install stuff in walls if the space behind a wall was not 3.5 inches/8.9 cm deep and I could get my whole self in there. of course that would mean a guy could get in there too, but what are the odds.

[starving-shartist]

<currently blogging from inside this idiot's walls>

[pancakeke]

PLEASE help me feed these ethernet cables downstairs or I'm gonna kill myself before you get a crack at me

[starving-shartist]

thread it down here champ, we'll get this installed come hell or high water

[pancakeke]

you are the best scary murderer who could have ever crawled into my walls

[iv-eyes]

Can Strahd von Zarovich go to Pride?

yes, we claim him

no, we don't claim him

Voting ended onJun 13

[agnesmontague]

ive invented (note: dubious claim) something i call the bear diet which is mostly fruits and vegetables with fish as the main protein source and something like once a month you eat a few hyperprocessed foods of your liking because that is when you, the bear, raid a dumpster in the suburbs

[stellarskyes]

after the hyperprocessed foods, do you take tranquilizers to simulate getting captured by animal control and returned to the wild?

[agnesmontague]

i would settle for melatonin gummies but well. knock yourself out

[machetelanding]

[husbandcinnamon]

y’all on the west coast know that nobody else calls them that right