bisexual terminator

28 - 🏳️‍🌈

[draegmuth]

I was doing fortune telling for my friend from coffee beans and told him he was gonna get spit roasted soon

[tinylilemrys]

Just thinking about Ilya making the playoffs for the first time with the Cens and getting texts from Yuna and David about it.

Yuna's one is like, "HOLY SHIT THE CENTAURS ARE IN THE PLAYOFFS! I never thought I'd be so excited to say that. 😂 This is such a huge achievement and I couldn't be more proud of you! This means I'm finally going to have to cave and by an Ottawa jersey. Don't tell David I told you, but he's still drying his eyes about it. Bubbly when you and Shane come over on Saturday for SURE, okay? Love you lots. SO proud."

And David's is like, "You did it, Cap! I know how hard you worked for this and it's paid off. We'll be cheering you on for every game. I am so unbelievably proud of you, kiddo. Love you lots - can't wait to see you and Shane on Saturday."

And Ilya just sits there unable to breathe because he's never had a text like this after making the playoffs except maybe from Svetlana. He replies to the messages, eyes blurry with tears, and spends the rest of the night opening them at random times, just overwhelmed by how loved he truly is.

[shanesloverboy]

your dad just died but your situationship answers the video call looking like this, wyd

[jemimaland]

shane doing research on the health benefits of prostate stimulation

[smokingrozanov]

Shane Hollander would go on Hot Ones and barely react to a single wing. Not because they’re not spicy but because he’s scared of looking like a pussy so he straight faces every wing & still gives wildly PR-approved answers

[smokingrozanov]

Ilya Rozanov goes on Hot Ones and starts pouring sweat by wing #3 but he just keeps saying “Russians do not break” and answering the questions. When they hit Da Bomb he starts swearing in Russian and calling Sean Evans a cocksucker which gets him mildly canceled in both the gay community & the Sean Evans enthusiast community

[themoonandmyman]

#myshane couldn’t give less of a fuck about queer culture he just likes dick in his ass and he loves a Man. If you asked him about Stonewall he’d think it was the name of a tech startup.

#myilya is a fag and he loves it. him and harris watch queer movies once a month with Harris’ mom and they drink margaritas with little umbrellas in them.

[oatmealdiva]

shane:

[saints3angels]

obsessed with this poor guy who gets dragged away from his takeout menu so his evil bisexual roommate can go have the worst club experience of his life

[ilyannarozanova]

Shane at the pearly gates: Hi God :)

God: Heyyyy so listen it's very simple we just have one rule and it's that you cannot under any circumstances have asked to be called homophobic slurs while choking on it in a public bathroom during a charity gala that your parents are attending

Shane, sweating: I can explain

God: I'd rather you didn't

[rozanovs]

What is it about Shane that you love and were drawn to? He is hyper competent at this one thing. He’s stereotypically masculine in a lot of regards. He’s a kind person, and he’s so overtly Canadian. He’s harboring something that he thinks is a career-ending secret because he just doesn’t have the emotional maturity or societal maturity to sort of understand what his own queerness means. To him, it’s most likely detrimental, which is the wrong assumption to some degree, but it shatters his own idea of what his masculinity is, or at least it cripples it. And yet, he still never harms a fly. (via The Hollywood Reporter)

↳ hudcon week 2026, day four: favourite quote

[lavenderprose]

[Cliff Marleau voice] Yeah I mean none of us were really surprised that Rozy is bisexual. He takes off his shirt the girl way. Kind of hot, to be honest. Wait this is off the record right.

[lavenderprose]

No joke i had a fever last night and I do not remember making this post oh my god.

[argillaforma]

shane: 🧍🏻‍♂️

ilya: hollander i need to fuck you so bad it’s not even funny

[draegmuth]

Ilya is every bisexual girl seeing a malnourished gamer

[ilyasvodka]

has anyone drawn this with Shane & Ilya yet

[princejeanot]

Op the vision is hilarious, you win

[draegmuth]

I owe these AO3 authors my life. Why are they so funny?

Part 1 here.

[hutsonwoolyums]

There’s just something about Ilya fucking Shane while his fingers are in his mouth, and Shane is supposed to ask permission to come but he’s struggling to get the words out around Ilya’s fingers, and Ilya’s teasing him a bit like “what is that sweetheart? I can’t understand you” but he won’t pull his fingers out, and Shane’s getting more and more desperate…

[drawballa]

Sleepy boys 💤

[pirrusstuff]

They're not actually friends

[smokingrozanov]

Someone chirped Shane about putting the ‘Metro’ in ‘metrosexual’ once & he stopped using hand lotion for 2 entire years